Chapter 85: Even the Absolute Being Is a First-Time Dad
Absolute One's First Time Being a Dad - Episode 85
The divine beings ruling over each underworld in the Abyss began unleashing their full authority (*格) in all directions...
Marvas, curled up on Kang-jun's lap in the form of a Doberman puppy, trembled and let out a low whimper.
"Mreow..."
Meanwhile, Kang-jun, feigning indifference, calmly surveyed the divine rulers of the underworld before speaking in a low voice.
"You all seem to have a lot of complaints."
Then, as if flaunting his own authority, he added:
"If you've got a problem, let's settle it right here."
The oppressive auras radiating from each deity tangled together, filling the conference room in an instant—
BOOOOM—!
Suddenly, the divine being known by the epithet "Great Judge Yama, Lord of the Underworld" slammed his massive fist onto the table.
"An insignificant brat who doesn't even know his place, acting like a thunderclap in broad daylight!"
In response, the goddess known by the epithet "Seventh of the Seven Deaths, Ruler of the Underworld"—Izanami—spoke in a soft, measured tone.
"■■■."
A brief silence fell.
"Divine ruler of the underworld once called Niflheim, now known as 'The Eternal Spring of Rest'..."
"Speak."
"Traditionally, even the most urgent Grand Council meetings are convened with at least a decade's notice..."
Seemingly struggling to contain her anger, she trailed off, took a deep breath, and then continued in a razor-sharp tone.
"Why summon us so abruptly?"
"Huh?"
"Did you not threaten us?!"
She then glanced at the other deities before continuing.
"Not only did you call this meeting without warning, but you annihilated dozens of innocent messengers just for not attending immediately—!"
Her words lashed out like a whip.
"Every one of us set aside mountains of work to be here, yet you show not the slightest courtesy—!"
She hesitated, gauging Kang-jun's reaction, but still spoke with conviction.
"How can you be so rude?"
Kang-jun snorted at the word "rude?" before replying in an icy tone.
"Fine. I'll be ruder then."
He tilted his head slightly and asked Izanami with feigned ignorance.
"What was your name again?"
She exhaled sharply. "Hmph!"
"Izanami."
Then, with emphasis:
"My true name is Izanami."
Kang-jun muttered "Izanami..." a few times before speaking again in a flat, emotionless voice.
"Izanami, you're now mute."
As she opened her mouth to protest—"Y-You dare—!"—he cut her off.
"If you so much as twitch your lips again, I'll personally tear your mouth apart."
She clenched her teeth, swallowing her words.
'Just as the rumors said... he's insane.'
Izanami, a high-ranking deity of the Takamagahara star cluster, had heard countless tales of ■■■'s erratic behavior.
How many gods had already met their end at his hands since he ascended to divinity not long ago?
Even now, he had proven it.
To force their immediate attendance, ■■■ had split the skulls of dozens of messengers in half.
Given his cruelty, his threat to "tear her mouth" was likely not an empty one.
"Yeah, that's more like it."
Kang-jun stared at Izanami, who was now silently watching him, and added:
"Some might think I'd go easy on you because you're a woman. That's a grave mistake."
"......"
"Believe it or not, I'm fair—I'll kill anyone who pisses me off, man or woman."
Just then, a "Ding!" chimed in Kang-jun's ear as a system message appeared.
[ The divine being "Seventh of the Seven Deaths, Ruler of the Underworld" from the Takamagahara star cluster feels deep terror toward your presence. ]
[ Due to the Creator God's intervention, the 'Hierarchy' among the Five Great Kings of Hell has been adjusted. ]
[ Izanami, ruler of the Takamagahara underworld, has been demoted to 5th in the hierarchy by the Creator God. ]
[ ■■■, ruler of the Eternal Spring of Rest underworld, has been promoted to 4th in the hierarchy by the Creator God. ]
Kang-jun muttered, "Hierarchy, huh..." as another message flashed before him.
【 Hidden Piece: Reorganization of the Kings of Hell 】
【 Current progress: 25% 】
After reading it, Kang-jun nodded slowly.
"Now I get it."
The so-called "hierarchy" seemed to adjust simply by crushing the arrogance of these high-and-mighty deities.
Given that his rank had risen to 4th and the progress increased accordingly...
It seemed the condition for completing this Hidden Piece was to climb to the top—1st place.
"Alright, I understand now."
Abruptly, Kang-jun tapped the table thoughtfully—"Tap, tap..."—before turning his gaze to Osiris.
"Hey, you."
Osiris, the divine ruler known as "Lord of Abydos", flinched slightly before meeting Kang-jun's eyes.
"Do you know anything about me?"
"Of course—"
"So you've heard things."
Kang-jun tilted his head, his voice deceptively soft.
"Then I wonder... have you heard about my temper?"
"That is..."
"Seems you don't. Let me kindly educate you. My attitude changes depending on my mood."
He smirked.
"Unfortunately, today's not a good day. So I feel like taking my anger out on you."
"What kind of—"
"That blue-tinged face of yours disgusts me. Sit on the floor until this meeting ends."
Humiliated, Osiris could only mutter under his breath—"This is absurd..."—before Kang-jun added:
"If you don't get on the floor right now, I'll split you in half."
Reluctantly, Osiris began to rise—but Kang-jun suddenly sighed as if reconsidering.
"Fine. Sitting on the floor is too much. Just turn around and stand there until we're done."
As Osiris turned around, grumbling—"This lunatic..."—Kang-jun added one last warning.
"But if I see that blue face one more time, I will cleave you in half as promised."
Osiris bit his lower lip, seething with humiliation but keeping his eyes fixed on the ground.
Despite being a high-ranking deity of the Kemet star cluster, his pride mattered less than survival.
'This disgrace is temporary...'
If ■■■—who acted no better than a madman—decided to kill him now, there would be no escape.
His only option was to survive, leave this place, and rally the deities of Kemet for revenge.
[The divine being 'Osiris, Lord of Abydos' from the Kemet Star Cluster trembles in profound fear at your presence.]
[Due to the Creator God's intervention, the 'hierarchy' among the Five Great Kings of Wisdom has been adjusted.]
[The ranking of Osiris, divine ruler of Kemet's underworld, has been adjusted to 4th place by the Creator God.]
[The ranking of the divine ruler of the Eternal Spring of Rest, '■■■', has been adjusted to 3rd place by the Creator God.]
Kang-jun skimmed through the successive system messages flashing before his eyes and muttered under his breath, "As expected..."
[Hidden Piece: Reordering the Kings of Wisdom]
[Progress for this Hidden Piece: 50%]
When another system message displaying the Hidden Piece's progress appeared, Kang-jun turned his gaze toward Yama, the King of Hell.
"What is it, you brat?!"
Yama, sensing his turn had come, snapped violently. Kang-jun responded in a flat tone, lacing his words with a threat.
"Old man, I don't like the look in your eyes. If you meet my gaze one more time, I'll rip your head off right here."
For a moment, the veins between Yama's brows bulged like the character for "river" (川) before he roared, channeling his divine power to its peak.
"Have you ever seen such a brazen, thunderous fool?!"
Around him, the accumulated narratives of countless eons began swirling violently like a storm.
"You, who only recently ascended to divinity—do you truly believe you can stand against me?"
Marbas, curled up on Kang-jun's lap, let out another pained groan before weakly speaking.
"M-Master... That hot-tempered old man seems to be on an entirely different level than the previous two divine beings..."
Kang-jun nodded a few times before replying with unnerving calm.
"True. Beheading you here would be too troublesome."
Yama scoffed loudly, as if he had expected that answer. "Ridiculous!"
But then Kang-jun suddenly asked, "Do you know what kind of enemy is the most terrifying?"
Yama's brows furrowed again.
"Someone who doesn't distinguish between friend and foe, who acts without hesitation."
"You—what kind of nonsense are you spouting now—?"
Kang-jun cut him off.
"Let me ask you one thing."
Then, countless Living Texts spilled from Kang-jun's body like a radiant halo.
"If I, who neither distinguish nor hesitate, decide to destroy you completely—do you think you can stop me?"
"You—!"
"If you ignore my warning, I'll reduce every person and place connected to you to ashes."
Kang-jun added coldly, "If you doubt my sincerity, meet my eyes just once more."
"......"
"I guarantee that when you come to your senses, you'll be standing alone in the ruins."
Yama gritted his teeth, muttering, "This madman...!"
"If you understand, then behave."
A frigid voice spread through the hall.
"Lower your gaze."
Slowly, Yama averted his eyes, which had been glaring all this time.
Then, with another ding!, a series of system messages appeared.
[The divine being 'Yama, Supreme Judge of the Ten Kings of Hell' from the Yama Star Cluster begins to feel deep fear toward your presence.]
[Due to the Creator God's intervention, the hierarchy among the Five Great Kings of Wisdom has been adjusted.]
[The ranking of Yama, divine ruler of the Ten Hells, has been adjusted to 3rd place by the Creator God.]
[The ranking of the divine ruler of the Eternal Spring of Rest, '■■■', has been adjusted to 2nd place by the Creator God.]
In an instant, Kang-jun had climbed to 2nd place among the Five Kings of Wisdom. Satisfied, he gave a single nod before turning his attention to Hades, who had been silently observing despite Kang-jun's relentless provocations.
"Oh-ho."
Kang-jun smirked. "So you were the 1st rank."
Hades met his gaze directly, his voice cold and laced with something dangerous.
"■■■, whom all the gods of the Abyss watch—surely you didn't commit this insolence just for the sake of rank?"
Kang-jun answered immediately.
"Right. Now it's your turn."
Hades sighed. "Disappointing." He stroked Cerberus, standing loyally by his side, before adding, "I have no interest in such trivial rankings."
"What?"
"If you want it, I'll yield it to you."
Without hesitation, Hades offered a gentle smile.
Then, more system messages appeared before Kang-jun.
[The divine being 'Hades, Formless Death' of the Olympus Star Cluster has yielded his rank to you.]
[Due to the Creator God's intervention, the hierarchy among the Five Great Kings of Wisdom has been adjusted.]
[The ranking of Hades, divine ruler of Olympus' underworld, has been adjusted to 2nd place by the Creator God.]
[The ranking of the divine ruler of the Eternal Spring of Rest, '■■■', has been adjusted to 1st place by the Creator God.]
A cheerful chime echoed in his ears as messages related to the Hidden Piece appeared once more.
[You have fulfilled all conditions for the Hidden Piece!]
[Hidden Piece: Reordering the Kings of Wisdom.]
[This Hidden Piece has been recorded as your new myth: The Supreme Among All Kings of Wisdom.]
[Your presence as ■■■ has grown even more distinct.]
Hades, who had been silently watching, finally spoke in a low, smooth voice that carried an undercurrent of danger.
"■■■, as a word of caution—it would be wise to refrain from flaunting your power any further."
Kang-jun silently gestured for him to continue.
"Many divine beings already covet your Epithet. Displaying your strength will only stoke their greed."
When Kang-jun remained silent, Hades added in a deceptively gentle tone,
"Consider this advice born of goodwill. I hope you won't take offense."
Kang-jun muttered, "Goodwill..." before nodding. "Noted."
Then, glancing around, he cut to the main point.
"Now that the mood is settled, let's begin the Underworld Summit."
Yama, still seething, shrugged his massive shoulders and grumbled,
"I can't fathom what kind of important matter warranted this chaos..."
Hades responded immediately.
"No objections."
Osiris, who had been standing with his back turned, also voiced his agreement.
"Likewise..."
Kang-jun's sharp gaze then landed on the only silent deity—Izanami.
"You. What's your answer?"
Izanami nodded repeatedly, but Kang-jun's expression remained displeased.
"Hey, can't you answer properly?"
"......"
"Where do you get off being this insolent?"
Under his piercing glare, Izanami couldn't speak, her eyes darting to the others for help.
"Master," Marbas whispered.
"Didn't you threaten to tear her mouth open if she so much as peeped again?"
Kang-jun blinked. "Ah, right."
Then, without missing a beat, he declared:
"We will now amend the clause regarding filial impiety in the Underworld's laws."