An Old Story
The room belonging to Hellion was filled with guns and blades, but Illid’s chamber felt like one vast library.
A large cherry-wood desk and bed stood at the center, while every inch of the towering walls was lined with books. Tall ladders leaned against the shelves here and there, and on each rung rested candles of varying colors and scents.
Above it all, a map as enormous as any mural in the Imperial Palace covered the ceiling. It depicted every city and region of the Tebron Empire.
“It’s rather dull, isn’t it? Hellion’s room has all those splendid ornaments, but mine… as you can see, it’s nothing but books.”
“Not at all. For someone who loves books, I can’t imagine a more wonderful room than this.”
“If there’s anything you’d like to read, please feel free to borrow it. It may not compare to the Imperial Library, but I have quite a respectable collection on trade and commerce.”
Illid guided me toward the long sofa beneath the window.
By now the night had grown deep. We leaned against the sofa side by side, gazing at the moon and stars floating beyond the glass.
“Thank you for helping me earlier.”
I took a sip of the wine I had brought and spoke first.
“What do you mean?”
“You stopped Hellion from saying more.”
“Ah… that. No, I was the one who first played along with his words. I should have noticed sooner and changed the subject.”
Illid murmured as he toyed with the stem of his wineglass.
He never said it outright, but I understood. He already knew a great deal.
“You noticed, then?”
I turned to the man seated beside me. The question was short, yet the meaning it carried was anything but simple. Illid tapped the rim of his glass with a long finger, then gave a slow nod.
“It flashed across my mind in that moment—the story the Duchess told me in the hunting grounds. She mentioned that a fallen noble the Duchess had brought into the palace was someone His Majesty wished to keep close.”
“……”
“In truth, I didn’t realize until Hellion spoke. I had heard rumors that a maid His Majesty cherished had vanished from the palace, but I never connected her to the one the Duchess had reassigned. The moment I heard those words, pieces began to fall into place. And then…”
“My reaction must have confirmed the Archduke’s suspicions.”
“……I won’t deny it.”
I had lived for many years at the very center of the palace and its power. In most situations I could control both my emotions and my expression perfectly, yet why did everything become so difficult when it concerned her?
“Don’t worry. I will never breathe a word of this to anyone.”
Illid pressed a finger to his lips and made a soft “shh” sound. I thanked him, then lowered my gaze to the white bandage wrapped around my hand.
“Don’t I look pathetic? Getting hurt like this over a single maid.”
“That wasn’t because of the maid. It was because the glass was too fragile. Please don’t blame yourself.”
“It’s true for her as well, but the truth is… I’ve never been able to remain cold when it comes to His Majesty.”
I let out a small sigh and leaned deeply into the sofa. Illid poured a little more wine into my glass. For a long time I simply stared at the black night sky, unable to continue.
He followed my lead, resting his head against the sofa and quietly watching the heavens. He didn’t press me to speak. His patient, unhurried presence filled me with gratitude.
“People assume His Majesty and I have always been close, but that isn’t true. I was afraid of him, and he was indifferent to me.”
After a heavy silence, I finally opened my mouth. This was a story almost no one alive still knew—a tale I had buried deep in my heart. Speaking of it was not easy, yet if it was Illid… if it was this man, I thought it would be all right.
After the civil war within the Regentera Duchy, my grandfather, Wilhelm Regentera, had brought both the central nobles and the commoners’ assembly to his side.
Not only that, he had even forced the Bladin family—the imperial family’s maternal relatives—into submission, becoming the undisputed most powerful figure in the empire.
All that remained was to secure the imperial line through marriage and solidify that power.
Yet no daughters had been born to the Regentera family. Even Marchioness Lilche, Bellona Regentera, had borne only sons, and those sons had produced nothing but grandsons.
Then I was born. The long-awaited arrival of a granddaughter filled my grandfather and great-aunt with immense joy. Even before I had taken my first steps, they tried to arrange my engagement to Crown Prince Primos.
However, Emperor Hebron responded with lukewarm interest and kept delaying the match.
After the civil war, imperial authority had hit rock bottom, and the maternal family that should have offered support lay in ruins. With the central nobles and commoners’ assembly—who ought to have stood with the imperial house—now following the Regentera Duchy, he would hardly have wanted his only daughter-in-law to come from our family.
But as I and the Crown Prince grew older, the marriage talks could no longer be postponed. The Emperor tried to find candidates from other noble houses, yet the nobles, terrified of the Regentera Duchy, dared not offer their daughters to the imperial family.
“From a young age I frequented the palace, receiving education as crown princess from Her Majesty the Empress. From the very first moment we met, she adored me. She truly cherished me as if I were her own daughter.”
Unlike the Bladin family that had fallen while aiding Fabiel Regentera, the late Empress’s natal family had maintained perfect neutrality and never opposed ours. Personally, having borne no children after the Crown Prince, she had doted on me especially.
“Unlike Her Majesty, His Majesty found me unpleasant. He never spared me a glance and only spoke to me when absolutely necessary.”
“Did His Majesty truly behave that way? I can hardly imagine it. Looking at how close he and the Duchess are now, it feels as though he is closer to her than to me—his own blood relative…”
Illid furrowed his elegant brows in disbelief.
“You may not believe it, but that is how it was.”
I murmured in a bitter voice and took another sip from my glass.
“Even when I made mistakes in etiquette or turned the palace gardens into a mud pit, he never scolded me. He would harshly rebuke Primos and Hellion for the same mischief, yet say nothing to me standing right beside them. He would simply look at me with cold eyes, then turn and walk away.”
“……”
“At first I was glad. I was thrilled that I alone escaped punishment. It was only after I grew a little wiser that I realized—scolding someone requires affection. That indifference is more frightening than anger or rebuke. From then on, I became so afraid of His Majesty that I avoided him whenever I could. Even when I had to greet him formally, I made sure to go with Primos or Hellion.”
“I had no idea such things had happened…”
Illid wore a grave expression, fully absorbed in my story. He turned his body completely toward me on the sofa and asked,
“Then when did your relationship with His Majesty begin to improve?”
“It gradually got better after Her Majesty the Empress passed away. After the Crown Prince died, we began to rely on each other and became as close as we are now.”
“……”
“That’s why neither Her Majesty nor His Highness the Crown Prince ever saw the warm relationship His Majesty and I share today.”
“……”
“It weighs so heavily on my heart. If they had seen us like this, they would have been so happy—especially Her Majesty. She would have been overjoyed…”
My throat tightened and I fell silent for a moment. I had thought I was fine, yet even now the mere thought of the late Empress brought a surge of emotion. Perhaps it was the wine flowing through my veins and the emptiness the night sky inspired.
“After Her Majesty and His Highness the Crown Prince passed away, only His Majesty and I remained in the palace. That was when he began to look after me. Especially after the Crown Prince’s death, I took over many of his duties, which meant I had to meet with His Majesty even more often.”
“……”
“After that, His Majesty slowly began to acknowledge me. He opened his heart completely. Thanks to that, life in the palace became a little more bearable.”
“I truly had no idea… that such a history existed between you two…”
Illid gave his wineglass a gentle swirl. The red liquid spun into a small vortex. I followed suit, and even my once-still glass bloomed with a crimson whirl.
“I really didn’t want to say this… but it seems I feel something like jealousy. It took me nearly ten years to earn His Majesty’s trust, yet that child captured his heart in such a short time…”
Jealousy was an emotion I had always found utterly foreign.
From childhood I had been showered with the love and attention of my entire family. Both my grandfather and great-aunt had favored me far more than my somewhat lacking older brother, Zar.
Though my parents had passed away when I was very young and I retained few memories, I remembered that they had always paid special attention to me, their youngest. And my kind older brother had never once resented me; instead he praised and took pride in me. Growing up in such a household, jealousy had always felt like something completely alien.
“That child is not only gifted in herbalism—she has talent in dance, singing, and even recitation.”
“……”
“His Majesty said she alone possesses a power that only she can give. At first I didn’t understand what he meant, but later I realized. She has a vitality and strength that I lack.”
“Why would you think that?”
Illid, who had worn a serious expression the entire time, finally spoke in a low voice.
“Duchess, you are already more than wonderful enough. You need not entertain such thoughts.”