Clothing
It was still early, before the sun had risen to its full height.
The streets of Seongdo were already crowded, thronged with busy people raising their voices as they came and went.
"It’s rather hectic, since the merchant caravan is leaving today."
Seomun Hwi glanced around and spoke to her, but Cheongwol only kept her head lowered and said nothing.
I've never been this close to a woman before, and I've certainly never spoken so much with one. Aside from my family, Seol is the first of everything to me. And you are the first of everything else.
Strictly speaking, she could not possibly be his first.
Only her body had become that of a woman; her mind was still that of a man.
Surely Seomun Hwi knew that well enough.
When Cheongwol flicked her gaze toward him, his eyes met hers as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
"What are you thinking about so deeply? You don’t even answer when I call you."
She couldn’t very well say she had been thinking about him, so Cheongwol turned away again in one abrupt motion.
He was a precious friend she had not seen in a long time, and she wanted to be warmer with him, really she did.
But ever since he had brushed her hair at Dangmun, for some reason she could no longer look him in the eye properly.
"...Nothing. Anyway, where are we going now? I’m starting to want a rest."
Trying to sound composed, she asked, and Seomun Hwi pointed toward the line of carriages with a finger.
"We’re here. I don’t know if you remember, but we’ve come to see someone you know."
"...Someone I know?"
Cheongwol tilted her head, and Seomun Hwi gave a slight nod.
"There—he’s just coming over. We were lucky. He’d have been leaving for Anhui tomorrow."
As soon as he finished speaking, a middle-aged man waved and approached them.
"Young Clan Leader!"
At first, Cheongwol stared blankly, unable to place the face in front of her, but gradually a long-forgotten memory began to surface in her mind.
"...Merchant Guild Master?"
---
The person Seomun Hwi had come to see was none other than Mo Wonpyeong, the guild master of Jin O Merchant Caravan.
He was the man who had freely offered Cheongwol a warm meal and clothes when she first wandered through the mountain paths after coming out to the Central Plains.
"I did think something was odd. So you really were a woman, not a man."
Mo Wonpyeong had been somewhat startled at first upon seeing Cheongwol, but after hearing that there had been circumstances and she had no choice but to hide her gender, he quickly accepted it.
"Thank you for understanding. Ah, and for your kindness as well. Thanks to you, I was able to get all the way to Mt. Kongdong in comfort."
Cheongwol bowed politely, and Mo Wonpyeong smiled with obvious pleasure.
"Think nothing of it. Still, if I’d known the two of you would come together, I would have delayed my departure a little. What a pity."
Seomun Hwi, too, let a faint smile appear.
"As a matter of fact, I only ran into Cheongwol by chance yesterday. We’re merely here to greet you lightly today, so please don’t trouble yourself over it."
Even so, Mo Wonpyeong still seemed regretful as he looked back and forth between them.
"I see. Reunions can happen anywhere, after all. If you come to Anhui, please be sure to visit our caravan. I’ll make certain you’re both well treated."
Cheongwol and Seomun Hwi lowered their heads slightly in response.
"We will definitely come by."
"I’ll look forward to that day as well."
The atmosphere was warm, and the conversation seemed ready to come to an end there.
Then Mo Wonpyeong suddenly clapped a hand to his palm, as if he had just remembered something, and looked at Cheongwol.
"Ah, now that I think about it, there was something more urgent than a meal. We still have about half a shichen before departure, so this works out nicely. Miss Cheongwol."
Being called so suddenly, Cheongwol looked at him in confusion.
"Yes, Guild Master?"
"You’re still wearing martial robes, so I take it you don’t have any clothes for women. We happen to have a few decent outfits in the caravan, so come with us and take a look."
---
Women’s clothes.
At first she had wanted to refuse outright, but when Seomun Hwi said it would be rude to turn down a merchant’s kindness, Cheongwol finally nodded slowly.
She had thought that, as a woman now, there would come a day when she would have to wear them, but she had never imagined that day would arrive so soon.
Soon afterward, several women came into the room and, chattering all the while, began trying various ornaments and garments on Cheongwol.
"Just as Guild Master said, you’re so beautiful that anything would suit you."
"Do you have a particular style of clothing in mind?"
"I’m sure the young master who came with you would like this sort of outfit as well. That’s only natural for men, after all."
Cheongwol thought that what mattered was whether she liked it, not Seomun Hwi, but she obediently changed in and out of the clothes they recommended.
And before long, out of the many outfits, fewer than five were left as candidates.
"It seems that, before being a woman, you’re a martial artist, so you prefer clothes that are easy to move in."
"In that case, something that can serve as both proper dress and martial wear would be best."
"If it’s martial wear a man would like, wouldn’t something like this be ideal?"
After much deliberation, Cheongwol put on the last remaining outfit and lifted her head slightly to look into the mirror.
It truly was a garment with no troublesome parts to hinder martial arts, and yet it naturally emphasized the curves of a woman’s body.
Except for one part.
Cheongwol lowered her gaze a little and looked at the chest of the garment, which was cut openly enough to leave bare skin on full display.
"..."
Reading the hesitation on her face, the women exchanged glances in a hurry.
Even to their eyes, the outfit suited Cheongwol far too well.
"These days, it’s rare to see women wrapped up so tightly that even their whole bodies are hidden. Especially martial artists."
"Exactly. In fact, women from the unorthodox sects prefer clothes with far shorter hems than this. I’ve heard it gets to the point where there’s nowhere to look."
"No man would dare look away from a lady wearing this."
I don’t really need to suit a man’s tastes.
Even as she thought that, Cheongwol found herself naturally wondering how Seomun Hwi would react.
...He told me to try it on, so he won’t laugh, will he?
If he did, she decided then and there that she would never touch women’s clothes again.
With a faintly uneasy heart, Cheongwol turned this way and that, inspecting herself in the mirror.
It’s not bad.
Perhaps because she really had become a woman, she did look more natural in it than she had in a Daoist robe or martial garb.
But that’s only the appearance.
After the great ceremony, the sense of estrangement and loss she had felt while looking at her own body had repeated itself countless times.
This time, too, the same bitter feeling brushed past her, and Cheongwol gave a small, rueful smile at the mirror.
"Thank you for your help. I’ll take this one."
---
While waiting for Cheongwol, Seomun Hwi stood in the next room, his nerves plainly on edge.
She was only changing clothes, and yet why did he feel this tense?
Watching him fidget, Mo Wonpyeong spoke first.
"Young Clan Leader, you’re fortunate indeed."
"...Pardon?"
"To have a beloved like that. I’m quite curious what happened after the day you two parted."
Beloved.
At those two words, Seomun Hwi’s usually unshifting expression was overwhelmed by visible bewilderment.
"Guild Master, I believe you have misunderstood something. Cheongwol is not my beloved; she is merely my friend."
"Everyone begins as friends."
At that, Seomun Hwi shook his head firmly.
"That is not it. Truly, I feel nothing of the sort. If possible, please never say anything like that in front of Cheongwol. I fear I may lose a precious friend."
"...Is that so? I thought the two of you were a perfect match and spoke too carelessly."
For some reason, he had been using honorifics not only with himself but with Cheongwol as well, and all along he had been thinking such things.
"Come to think of it, just as Young Clan Leader may have exchanged marriage talks with Miss Dang Sohye, Miss Cheongwol might also have done the same with someone else. I spoke without thinking. I apologize."
Cheongwol might already have been engaged in marriage talks with another person?
He had said he wasn’t interested in Ak Seo-ah, so that couldn’t be.
Besides, aside from himself and Ak Seo-ah, Cheongwol hardly had any friends worth mentioning, did she?
Seomun Hwi was just about to let out a dry laugh when a man from yesterday’s conversation suddenly surfaced in his memory more vividly than the others.
A man who, unlike him, had silently stayed by Cheongwol’s side for two years.
A man Cheongwol respected enough to ignore rank and call him senior brother.
Most of all, a man she had trusted and relied on even after becoming a woman.
As the kindly smiling face of Unhak rose before him, the corners of Seomun Hwi’s mouth stiffened at once.
Even if her body had become that of a woman, her mind had not changed, so there should be no such thing.
And yet, even if Cheongwol really were in such a relationship with Unhak, it had nothing to do with him.
So why was it that merely imagining the two of them together made him feel so deeply displeased?
...No, that can’t be it.
Seeing the grave look on Seomun Hwi’s face, Mo Wonpyeong realized that he had committed one slip of the tongue after another.
Not that they aren’t like that. He’s making such a terrifying face just from the suggestion. Wait—could it be that it’s only the young clan leader who has feelings...
Just as their thoughts were beginning to scatter in a tangled mess, Cheongwol’s voice came from outside the door.
"Hwi, I’m coming in now, so don’t laugh."
---