Chapter 147
Chapter 147
“I am truly sorry, Hyung. For presumptuously taking it upon myself to judge the situation based on the private experience you shared with me…”
“I told you, it’s fine.”
If I heard it one more time, it would be the fifth.
I accepted Kim Rae-bin’s apology with a hint of exasperation.
‘If anyone saw this, they’d think I’d framed him for a crime.’
All the kid had done was tell the members, “Moon-dae Hyung said he remembered something from his past while he was sleeping.”
He’d likely done it because he was scared or nervous.
He probably thought that by sharing it, they could somehow interpret my erratic behavior and figure out how to deal with me.
‘…I thought I’d hidden it well enough.’
I was wrong.
After returning to Korea and checking the footage from the Summer Package shoot, my vibe was incredibly awkward and gloomy.
‘Even I would have handled myself with caution, looking like something was about to snap.’
The members’ worried or tense expressions were caught on camera from time to time.
The only reason the shoot proceeded without a hitch was entirely thanks to Keun Se-jin, who talked twice as much as usual to fill the gaps.
‘…Ryu Cheong-woo held back.’
It was clear he’d realized from the start of the shoot that I felt uncomfortable around him.
Suppressing a groan, I spoke to Kim Rae-bin.
“Then I should be the one to apologize. I’m sorry for ruining the mood.”
“Pardon?? Not at all! There is absolutely no need to apologize for an unexpected situation that occurred during a continuous filming schedule…”
“Right. For that same reason, you don’t need to apologize either.”
“…! I understand. Thank you!”
Once I provided a logic he could accept for why he didn’t need to apologize, Kim Rae-bin finally stopped talking, bowed, and left.
“I shall take my leave now. I hope you have a comfortable rest.”
“Yeah. You too.”
The room fell silent instantly. One roommate was out for a schedule, and the other had a quiet hobby.
‘The world is finally peaceful.’
I sighed and buried myself in the bed.
But then, a sound came from the bed next to mine.
‘…It hasn’t even been three seconds since I said it was quiet.’
It was Bae Se-jin.
“…Are you, um, okay?”
“Huh? Yes.”
It was a generic answer, but my condition was actually quite stable.
I wasn’t sure if it was because I’d vented a bit while drinking at the end, or if it was because I’d left the unfamiliar country where the incident happened and returned to the familiar dorm room.
Whichever it was, I didn’t feel like I couldn’t stand it anymore like before.
Now, it was just a cold sweat whenever the memory suddenly popped up. So, I was able to readily add an explanation.
“I won’t be a hindrance to filming anymore. Don’t worry.”
“I-I wasn’t worried about that!!”
Bae Se-jin let out a sharp shout, then, as if startled by his own voice, quickly pulled his book back up to hide his face.
“……!”
What was I supposed to do with that?
Anyway, that was why I’d marked today on my calendar immediately after checking the Summer Package footage. Today was the day the Summer Package was released to the public.
‘Just in case.’
I picked up my smartphone and finally began monitoring the reactions.
“……Hmm.”
I’d been worried, but fortunately, there didn’t seem to be any major issues.
Thanks to the magic of editing, my attitude had been transformed into looking merely "appropriately reserved."
The reactions weren’t bad either.
‘As I thought, reducing my reactions altogether was better than having sharp ones.’
Minimizing my responses to the other members and the situation, as well as my emotional expression, seemed to have been the right choice.
Of course, there were occasional troll accounts posting things like “Where did Park Moon-dae’s rookie mindset go?” but they were mostly getting shut down without gaining any traction.
Since it was a one-time thing and I’d even missed the W Live before the shoot, public opinion had settled on the idea that I was truly ill.
……My conscience pricked me a little.
‘It’s not like I was specifically sick.’
Since I’d already used the illness excuse once, I’d have to take really good care of my health for the next six months.
If I got "sick" again, it wouldn’t be seen as a one-off, and then the rumors might actually start gaining ground.
It seemed like I’d gotten away with it this time because Summer Packages are mostly bought and watched by fans, but I couldn’t be sure about the future.
‘I need to be careful.’
I shrugged and turned off my phone.
Seeing the clean state of the internet, I felt that pushing myself a bit back then had been worth it.
…And, I was also keeping the promise I made then.
Beep, beep, beep.
[Counseling Time]
As I turned off the alarm on my phone, Bae Se-jin spoke up again tentatively.
“…Going?”
“Yes.”
“Good call.”
“Well, I suppose so.”
I’d decided to get counseling at the same time Seon A-hyun went for his.
Thanks to that, I headed out today as well, matching the time Seon A-hyun returned from his schedule.
“M-Moon-dae. Let’s contact each other… when we’re done…!”
“Uh… sure.”
But to be honest, it wasn’t of much use.
“So, what has been your biggest concern lately?”
“…Just the usual things everyone worries about.”
“I see~ Could you give me an example?”
“Well, I worry about whether I’ll be able to do my job properly.”
It wasn’t like I could tell the counselor, “If I don’t resolve this status effect, I’m going to die, but this damn thing is showing me weird hallucinations and making my PTSD symptoms flare up like a seizure.”
I was just doing it for show.
“Moon-dae-ssi. You’re already doing well enough. Have you ever thought that maybe you could be a bit more generous with yourself?”
“……A little, I suppose.”
Well, still…… there was a certain sense of stability that came from the act of venting to a professional.
I felt my frayed nerves calm down and my inner composure solidify.
Combined with a schedule that wasn’t too overwhelming since we weren’t in a domestic promotion period, I finally felt like retrying that.
Inside the dorm bathroom after returning from counseling.
I took a deep breath.
“……Status Window.”
Goosebumps ran down my spine, but it wasn’t enough to make me quit.
And so, I checked the status window for the first time in a long while.
…To properly confirm the new status effect.
[‘Death if Not an Audience’]
: Death if you do not meet more than 200,000 audience members within the set period.
Progress: 2,219 / 200,000
Remaining Period: D-339
‘Are you insane?’
Once again, the numbers were unconscionable.
‘This is a number that absolutely requires an overseas tour.’
I’d managed to hit two thousand thanks to events, but there was a limit to that. We didn’t have events all year round.
According to the plan, we were supposed to start a domestic concert in the fall and then go on tour, so the timing wasn’t an issue… but now it was a matter of scale.
It wasn’t at a level where I should give up early, and if I added up events and such, it was roughly within the realm of possibility.
‘In the end, we just have to release a good album.’
I was back to the fundamental issue.
…Still, thinking that this might be the last one brought back some peace of mind.
‘At least it’s not a Grand Prize.’
I was about to dismiss the status window with slightly trembling hands when I suddenly realized I didn’t need to use my hands.
It meant my brain wasn’t functioning properly.
‘…I’m not normal.’
The status window vanished. I resisted the urge to bury my face in the sink again.
And I thought.
‘…What exactly do you want?’
I had no idea why this status window was acting like this.
It was different when the first reward revealed Park Moon-dae’s… that is, the real Park Moon-dae’s circumstances, or when the second one explained Cheong-ryeo’s situation in detail.
I’d thought those were hints about how the current situation was unfolding.
But what I saw in America… fuck, anyway, that… wasn’t that, was it?
It wasn’t an explanation, nor was it help… was it?
“……Whew.”
Let’s stop.
I took a deep breath and cleared my head.
Thinking about it more wasn’t going to give me an answer anyway. Let’s just do what needs to be done.
That was the best way.
‘First, the biggest upcoming schedule.’
It was my individual schedule. The one I’d thought of ever since I vented to Ryu Cheong-woo while drinking.
‘It’s not bad to have some time working alone.’
…Actually, I hadn’t had a proper conversation with Ryu Cheong-woo since coming back to Korea.
I could manage greetings, light small talk, or reading scripts in front of the camera without much trouble now, but anything beyond that… given our history, it was a bit difficult to try.
‘I should use this to keep some distance.’
I gladly accepted the individual schedule.
And truth be told, there was a part of me that was looking forward to it.
Because the stat I’d increased last time was specifically for this variety show.
‘It actually ended up happening later than I expected.’
It was the perfect situation to challenge myself for a change of pace.
I pushed the useless clutter out of my mind and let out a small laugh, thinking only of the clear facts.
This was a singing variety show.
And my current Vocal stat was……
S-.
<The Singer I Made>
This was a variety show that had recently become a huge hit on MBS.
The format of the program—where celebrities hide their identities, sing, and a winner is chosen through a survival format—was perhaps a bit cliché.
In fact, there was a defunct variety show on MBS itself that had been a massive hit with that very format.
However, <The Singer I Made> had a unique point of differentiation. It was… that the contestants didn’t appear in person.
That’s right. They appeared on stage as holograms.
And not as themselves, but as ‘characters’ they had set up.
The contestants created profiles—from appearance to personality, tastes, and age—to produce a mascot singer character.
Then, a hologram machine supported by a large corporation implemented that character on stage.
Viewers were fascinated by the cutting-edge technology that even replicated the motions of the contestants linked below the stage, and they were drawn in without any sense of incongruity thanks to the familiar format.
So, a high school student flipping through channels stopped his remote when he saw the familiar stage screen of this variety show.
“Oh~ the fake singers~”
Calling it by its popular nickname, the male student chuckled and watched the screen without much thought.
His older sister had gone into her room to watch those TeSTA or TeSTER guys.
He’d probably be able to lie comfortably in front of the TV for a while without worrying about her taking the remote.
The program had just finished its mid-show commercials and was starting Part 2.
[A survival stage where imagination becomes reality!]
[<The Singer I Made>! The ‘singer’ who will take the stage for the fifth performance is now! Ready!]
[Waaaaaaa!]
The scenes where unpredictable characters—ranging from baseball players to tuna mayo rice balls—suddenly appeared were always quite fun.
‘It’s about time for a dinosaur to come out again~ Please don’t let it be something boring!’
Thinking of the previous winner, a red, one-eyed dinosaur with short forearms named ‘Tyrannosauron,’ the high schooler grinned.
The MC shouted energetically.
[The next singer~ is entering!]
[His name is……]
Drumroll. Spotlights crisscrossed the stage frantically.
Then, a tall figure began to materialize on stage.
A fine body dressed in a white wedding tuxedo was covered by a white bridal veil.
Behind him, a hologram of white butterflies fluttered around the figure before disappearing.
‘Ah, it’s a human again~’
Just as the high schooler was about to jeer, he saw past the veil in the close-up.
In the place where a face should be, there were instead vibrant, colorful flowers arranged like a bouquet.
“Whoa.”
[Please welcome, ‘May Groom’~!]
Artificially inserted cheers and applause echoed from the screen.