Chapter 26
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 26
Chapter Title: Only I Know What Happened Then
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Before finally getting down to business alone with Lee A-ram.
Let me ramble for a bit.
This is a thread of karma stretching back to my first playthrough.
Something I absolutely have to address to rise above my pathetic middle school days and truly begin my second playthrough.
Perhaps it's the mission—or duty—of someone who's regressed.
Or maybe a privilege.
It's just like me, someone who regressed after getting old but didn't grow up at all.
I've decided to keep living as the total loser from my first playthrough without changing a bit.
I just ambiguously soaked up society's crap.
After living 37 years, I'm nothing but an immature adult.
[1st Playthrough Record: 『Lee A-ram』]
[▶……]
That's why I felt I had to check this and move on.
Yeah.
Back then, I couldn't even dare to speak it aloud.
An incident blew up right after, and I transferred schools.
So, this is probably the first time in 37 years.
Finally defying the karma of my first playthrough, in my second one.
"Lee A-ram."
Properly calling her name.
"……."
Of course, Lee A-ram ignored me.
Was the "don't talk to me" vibe too much?
Even for a total loser nerd like me, it sounded pretty lame.
But to confirm what I wanted, I had no choice but to keep going.
"Why did you choose the science club?"
So, for now, a roundabout strategy.
"I want to apologize for freaking out earlier."
Honestly, you might wonder what my freakout has to do with the question I just asked.
But I learned from peeking over the shoulders of popular kids that these leaps and excuses are key.
You know how it goes.
Boyfriend and girlfriend fight.
The boyfriend shows up and knocks on the door.
The girlfriend has the chain on, cracks the door open, and immediately rejects him, asking why he's there.
He apologizes, she says it's fine and tries to close it.
At that moment, jamming your foot in to stop the door from closing is crucial.
Then there are usually two routes.
First, overreact like your foot got caught and act like it hurts like hell.
If she panics and opens the door fully, you're in easy.
Even if she's still pissed and tells you to cut the act and tries to close it again.
Popular kids usually make excuses like this.
Something like, it's super hot summer, right?
I'm dizzy, about to get heatstroke— you know today's the record high, yeah?
Gradually pull her into your pace, say you'll just have one glass of water and leave right after.
Pull that crap to get into her room.
She knows it's a lame excuse, but admires the effort and offers water anyway.
The point is, no matter how bullshit the excuse.
Excuses are super important.
Another example: suddenly asking "Do you know the way?" in front of a university gate, and everyone runs.
Lie that it's for a sociology class survey, lead with the questionnaire, and they'll at least hear you out initially.
Sometimes they end up in a weird cult later.
Or bail quick if it seems off.
Depends on the person's skills.
……My rambling's getting long, anyway.
"As you just saw, all those self-proclaimed physics and science nerds are like that. A scientist like Tony Stark, the one you like? He's only in movies."
Maybe my earlier mindless rant actually worked a bit.
"……God, seriously."
Lee A-ram's tightly shut lips finally parted after ignoring me.
"Why the hell do you care?"
Because I'm interested in you.
Because I'm curious.
Both are landmines.
"Hong Ja-hee and your friends all picked the movie club. It's weird you didn't."
Now, advance with irrefutable logic.
"I heard from her—actually, Hong Ja-hee said she'd prefer if you joined the movie club too. She doesn't get why you picked science club."
After irrefutable logic.
Back it up with a quote from someone else, not me.
Especially if it's her friend— that should work for sure.
"……That's."
Lee A-ram was actually pondering it.
The pace, which was heading toward her at first with her questioning why I cared.
Now shifted back to me.
But push too hard here, and she'll bolt.
"Oh, wait— you think there's a Tony Stark type in the science club?"
So, step back with some dumb line.
Hand the pace back to Lee A-ram.
"……You think I'm some desperate spinster hunting for a guy?"
A look like, what the hell makes you think that… total nonsense.
Actually, unlike the other party kids, Lee A-ram never flirted with boys in class or approached them first.
Of course, shortening skirts is basically the rule, and she did that a bit.
But she toed the line without crossing the knee-length dress code.
"No, definitely not."
I faked an awkward smile.
By the way, this is my first-playthrough specialty.
So maybe it was a real awkward smile.
"No way you actually like science that much?"
All your friends applied for movie club, but you went science alone.
If there's a reason, either you love science like crazy, like me.
"Or for grades?"
Or just for some benefit.
To get into a good high school later.
Building grades for special-purpose high schools.
That was the only reason I could think of.
Of course, I already knew from the first-playthrough record it's neither.
But cheating is cheating.
I wanted to confirm it myself.
"……Grades are part of it, but I don't love science that much."
Lee A-ram nodded reluctantly with a tired sigh.
I was about to follow up, but stopped.
"Problems are hard, solving them hurts my brain. Seems like I could live fine without knowing this stuff."
Because she kept talking.
I dropped all my flippant attitude.
And listened to her story with the most serious expression ever.
"……But, there's always a right answer. That's pretty nice."
My eyes widened a bit.
Something welled up inside, but I held it back for now.
Maybe the first time since regressing to the second playthrough.
"Right."
I put on an adult-like face.
"But science doesn't always have a right answer."
I continued.
"Problems often don't have answers when you're solving them."
Actually, most are full of those.
Only a tiny fraction with answers are known to us now.
In fact, cutting-edge physics theory says.
Stuff humans haven't observed, don't even know exists.
But it must exist because otherwise it doesn't make sense, and that's all we can say.
Piles of things shrouded in veils.
They say that makes up 96% of our universe.
"In other words, the physics humanity's built over centuries is just 4% of the universe. And we're fumbling around even in that 4%."
Nearly quasi-expert in the same field, though different area.
But this time, my easy explanation really got her attention.
Lee A-ram leaned in.
"Dark energy…… dark matter, stuff like that?"
"Oh, you know your stuff?"
"……Just picked it up from reading."
At our Sinnong Middle School, studious kids are rare,
And kids ditching friends for science club? Even rarer. Book readers? Almost nonexistent.
"……Anyway, you wouldn't get it."
Like tossing a ball back and forth.
Her turn now.
"But science at least tells you if this is right or wrong…… if the path you're on is correct or not. The world doesn't."
Honestly, sounds like middle school edgelord talk.
Still, I took it seriously.
"Morals are the experts on right and wrong, aren't they?"
Now I tossed it back.
"We have a volunteer club. Their CA activities seem more legit than here."
Actually, the volunteer club's CA involves visiting nursing homes for elders,
Teaching kids at orphanages who lack proper education.
Heard it's solid for a CA.
"……They just tell you the duty, not how to do it."
"Yeah, always nitpicking."
This is bad, that's bad.
Not always right.
Morals are mostly a collection of nitpicks.
It teaches to give water and bread to a dying Good Samaritan in the desert.
But not the intervals for food and water if they've starved too long, lest it kills them.
Or how to treat severe dehydration right now.
Science, at least, is fair on its own.
Good or bad person.
Poor or rich.
Known or stranger.
At most, biology-wise, just gender or age.
Beyond that, no discrimination— purely symptom-based treatment from facts.
Doctor's attitude aside.
Medicine/science methodology is like that.
Before a doctor, president or homeless are just patients.
President not made of special atoms.
All just complex systems of protons, neutrons, electrons— organisms.
I rambled on like spilling a story.
"……Sophistry, but it kinda makes sense."
"Right? Our homeroom teacher would hate it."
"Obviously. Probably demand back the candy you punched out of his hand."
"Already ate it all."
"……That much already?"
It's turning into a natural conversation.
Of course, not middle-school appropriate.
Generous view: precocious kids. Blunt: two edgelords jamming.
But that's enough.
"I don't like volunteering anyway. I picked science club after some thought."
That opened the floodgates.
"And volunteering types are funny because—"
Lee A-ram leaned closer, chatting like with a peer.
"There's a girl in our class who joined volunteer club. Park Ra-hel."
Was there?
"Not into that stuff, so dunno. Anyway, there is?"
"……You're something…… Anyway, yeah. She was in my class in 6th grade. Know that?"
"What?"
"She was the ringleader of the bullies."
Whoa.
Exactly what I was dying to know.
I didn't show it outright, just made a face.
"Pick one kid she didn't like via text, then total ghost for a week."
"Oof."
Sudden chest pain.
Feels like I have PTSD from something similar.
"Do all Park Ra-hels do that?"
"……? You said you didn't know her. Know someone like that?"
"Nah, just saying."
Not discriminating the name.
Just that famous webtoon character.
Part 1 basis.
After that…… no clue?
Anyway, swallow it and gloss over.
Lee A-ram dropped it and continued.
"Anyway, that bitch is probably still badmouthing me. She was behind bullying Han So-mi early semester too."
"Ah, so that's why she was cleaning alone. No idea."
"……You don't look like you had no idea."
"Really?"
I skimmed the status window in front of me and shrugged casually.
Then I asked.
"So, Lee A-ram, how'd you handle her? With your personality, just helping Han So-mi wouldn't cut it."
"Obviously. Approaching like that would insult So-mi. I confronted the bully directly, same as back then."
"Park Ra-hel? Same as back then?"
"I told you. Same class in 6th grade."
Her line implied a lot.
I'd learned it all recently.
"Anyway, tons of crap happens climbing to 1st year."
"Eventful life."
"……Yeah."
Just let it pass without prying.
And,
"But how's that related to science club?"
Back to the main point.
"I get skipping volunteer club with enemies there."
Now, I should hear it.
"Plenty other CAs good for grades. You don't love science."
Like English newspaper club.
Or reading club if you like books.
CA time is just reading and reports anyway.
"……Ah, that."
Lee A-ram hesitated.
Hesitated to speak.
"Ugh, why do I have to tell you this……."
Complaining, but.
Soon, a short "Hoo……." sigh of resignation.
"……Don't tell my friends? Especially not Hong Ja-hee."
"No reason to."
"Anyway."
"Got it. Won't say."
"……Fine then."
Lee A-ram caught her breath.
After hesitating,
"That……."
Lips I thought she'd never open to anyone parted slowly.
"……KAIST, you know it?"
Her voice naming that proper noun made my heart sink.
Beginning and end mirror each other.
Return to origins.
Unity of finite and infinite.
The truth that extremes meet.
Various words floated up, but.
I listened quietly.
"That university…… You'd know, right? Han Kyung-jun."
Cautiously saying my name with those red frost lips, her voice.
And so,
Short, but in our talk, somewhat long.
I could see the end approaching.