135 – Murim Nymph # 5
“So you're Ha Ildo, the Dog-Squirrel guy?”
A man in a black Chinese suit had planted himself in front of me.
He stood a head shorter than I did, but the sheer force of his presence was like a soldier charging into battle with a spear in hand.
An awakener. B-Rank, by the feel of it, most likely.
What caught my eye, though, was the mantis perched on his shoulder.
━Samat, smat…!
It was about the size of a palm and crimson from head to toe, looking for all the world like a frenzied berserker, bristling with a savage, razor-sharp aura. What stunned me even more was that the mantis's left hook-arm had been forged from some kind of special steel.
“Is that a real mantis?”
“It is a real mantis! This one is the Lava Berserker Mantis…! A rare specimen I discovered in a B-Rank rift deep in the jungle—one only a beast tamer of my caliber, I, Lao, could ever hope to tame…!”
Lava Berserker Mantis.
Even the name packed a punch.
“I lost one of my legs in a rift, you see, and this mantis was suffering through the very same ordeal—so I fitted him with a hook-leg crafted from special magic stone…! And over many long months, we grew close…!”
According to Lao, he'd attached the prosthetic leg to the Lava Berserker Mantis, fed it honey and dew with a syringe, and nursed it back to health for a whole month. That was how they'd bonded—and how the mantis got its name: Samarang.
Soon enough, Oinoi let out a gasp of admiration.
“The Lava Berserker Mantis is an exceedingly nymph-friendly mantis, it is…! Despite its terrifying appearance, these friends live on honey and dew, they do…!”
Huh. Good to know.
Anyway, I thought it was a touching story. This Lao fellow really did love animals—enough to nurse an injured one back to health himself.
“And the cat you're holding there?”
I asked, because Lao was cradling a cat with magnificent silver fur.
“This one is Myaomyao, the Iron Mountain Cat! I rescued her as she lay dying of thirst in the Iron Mountains of a rift overgrown with needle-sharp thorns…! Taming her took more than three whole months…!”
Impressive, I thought. To think there was someone out there who rescued wounded animals and took responsibility for raising them. Apparently everyone else thought he was pretty great too, because Lao had become something of a star on social media.
“Enough talk, Ha Ildo! Let's settle this! Between you and me, we'll decide who's the better beast tamer—the loser shall serve the winner as his honored Hyung-nim! Go, Meiling of the Iron Fist!”
Poof—
A panda appeared in front of Lao. It was about my size, which made it plenty imposing.
━Meiiing—.
Whoosh, whoosh—
The way it snapped rapid punches through the air made it look like it had learned boxing at a circus. So this was no ordinary panda, apparently. Given the name "Iron Fist," its specialty was probably martial arts?
“Keong-keong-ah!”
I decided to send out Keong-keong-i too. Keong-keong-i was an all-rounder—able to hold its own against any opponent in its own way, which made it an excellent vanguard for a probing match!
━Keong-keong…!
━Meiiing—.
Dog-squirrel and panda squared off. As everyone held their breath in the tense standoff, I called out first.
“Go! Gale Keong-keong Slash!”
Poof—!
Keong-keong-i bit down on its own tail and leapt into the air, spinning round and round. Round and round and round—. The centrifugal force built up that way, combined with the friction of biting its own tail, turned Keong-keong-i's tail into a weapon surpassing the sword-aura of any swordsman alive.
━Kreureung…!
At last, with a cry like rolling thunder, Keong-keong-i whipped its tail at the panda.
Whoom, THWACK—!
━Grooang…!
Meiling the panda toppled forward like a felled giant tree and swayed on her feet. Keong-keong-i's attack had struck her square in the solar plexus—her weak point—and knocked her out of commission!
“No way… Meiling…!”
It had been an easier victory than I expected! But I couldn't let my guard down yet. There were still that strange cat and that strange mantis to deal with.
“Go, Myaomyao!”
Poof—!
Lao hurled the silver-furred cat from his arms straight at me. Dog-squirrel and Iron Mountain Cat. The two animals faced each other in a razor-tight standoff.
“Myaomyao! Iron Mountain Strike!”
━Myaaong…!
Myaomyao the Iron Mountain Cat puffed up her silver fur and lunged at Keong-keong-i. At that ferocious charge, Lao shouted with total confidence.
“An Iron Mountain Strike from a cat raised in mountains of steel can fell even the mightiest tree! In close combat and raw speed, not even a Dog-Squirrel can beat her! If anything, her steel-hard body makes her even stronger!”
Myaomyao moved with a cat's signature blinding speed, and her body seemed to be reinforced with some strange mana until it was as hard as steel itself.
Steel. Steel, is it…!
“Keong-keong-ah! Fire breath!”
━Kreureung…!
FWOOOOOSH—
Flames erupted from Keong-keong-i's mouth. Hardened steel is ever the enemy of roaring fire!
Fwoooosh—!
━Myaaong…!?
Myaomyao the Iron Mountain Cat, mid-lunge, took the burst of flame head-on. She staggered drunkenly back and forth—then finally couldn't take it anymore and flopped over, out cold.
━Myaaong….
“Myaomyao too…!? A Dog-Squirrel that breathes fire…!? I've never heard of such a thing!”
All that remained now was Samarang, the Lava Berserker Mantis. I recalled Keong-keong-i, who might be tired from the back-to-back fights, and pulled Ang-ang-i, Emperor of the Honey Ants, out of my pocket.
“Go, Ang-ang-ah…!”
━Zeuzi…!
“Meiling, and now Myaomyao too…! But…! I still have Samarang, the grandmaster of Praying Mantis Fist…! Go, Samarang…! Show them your true strength—uh…?”
Lao had been shouting valiantly when he suddenly began glancing around. I, meanwhile, started feeling a tickle on my back—like a mantis had landed on it. Sure enough, when I reached a hand back to check, there was a red mantis sitting squarely in my palm.
━Samat, smat…!
Samarang the red mantis stood atop my hand, wiggling his front legs left and right. The gesture looked remarkably similar to the way Kwang-kwang-i greeted people.
“What is this.”
“F-for a shy Lava Berserker Mantis like Samarang to take to a complete stranger like that…! The true master of warfare wins without fighting…! Even the Art of War that China proudly claims as its heritage says as much…!”
Thud—
His knees buckled, and Lao crumpled to the floor.
“My… my utter, perfect defeat….”
Lao accepted his loss more gracefully than I'd expected. Thinking it had been a surprisingly good match, I held out my hand to him.
“You've got some amazing animals yourself, you know? Good fight.”
“Ha Ildo, you….”
Swoosh—
Just as Lao reached for my outstretched hand—
“Thinking of sliding past this touching moment is a NO-GO…! Interrupting Ilinoi's mealtime is an unforgivable move, and it is…! Ilinoi shall now beat this fellow senseless…! Let's do it…!”
Thudthudthudthudthudthudthudthud—
Illinoi laid into the defeated Lao without mercy.
“This is the fist of the great American continent, it is…! You do-you-know that Kung Fu traces its origins back to the Nymph-fu, you do…!”
“AAAAAGH~!”
At last Lao tumbled over the second-floor railing of the inn and crashed—splat—onto a table set up on the ground floor. Crash. Bang-crash—. Tables and dishes shattering and collapsing in every direction.
“Hey, Illinoi…! You can't just wail on people and smash the furniture like that…!”
I worried that we, as outsiders, were causing a scene—but strangely enough, the onlookers seemed deeply impressed by Illinoi's display.
“Magnificent!”
“What magnificent fists!”
“Just which sect's fist art is that!?”
I… was no longer entirely sure what was what anymore. With over a billion people, China really did come in every flavor, didn't it.
━Keong-keong…!
“…So cute…!”
I introduced Keong-keong-i, Ang-ang-i, Kwang-kwang-i, and Kalinoi to Lao. Being the animal lover he was, he never quite managed to collect himself.
“That golden sheen! I've never seen an ant so dignified in all my life…! And this spider is so gentle and sweet, too…! A spider that sings—unbelievable…!”
“Ang-ang-i does have a bit too much dignity. Comes with being an Emperor Ant. And Kwang-kwang-i can dance, too.”
━Zeuzi…!
━Hio-ong…!
“Truly…! To have tamed so many extraordinary beasts all at once…! Hyung-nim, you truly are remarkable…! Even the Beast Palace would be hard-pressed to find a man like you…!”
The vast continent was a land ruled by the logic of strength. After acknowledging his defeat, Lao addressed me as "Hyung-nim" and treated me with the deepest respect. For some reason my nose felt tingly, but I affected nonchalance and said,
“You don't tame animals. You make them want to follow you. Open your heart first and wait, and they'll come to you on their own.”
“Truly…! What a magnificent lesson…!”
Click, click—
Lao asked if he could take photos of the animals and post them to his social media account. I happily agreed—and truth be told, I'd taken some great shots of Myaomyao the Iron Mountain Cat and Samarang myself.
“Muh-huh! This jajangmyeon is also very delicious, it is…! Ilinoi hereby appoints you a nymph-friendly person, she does…! Think of it as an honor, you will…!”
It turned out Lao's real specialty was cooking. He'd wanted to feed the animals proper homemade meals instead of commercial feed, so he'd studied all kinds of cuisine and gotten quite good at it. And apparently Lao's jajangmyeon had won Illinoi's heart.
“Master! I'm so glad it suited your palate!”
Lao, who now called me Hyung-nim, addressed Illinoi as "Master" and showed her every courtesy befitting the title. Ever since taking Illinoi's fists, he said, his mind had grown clear, as if he'd broken through into some state of "enlightenment."
I couldn't say I understood.
“So, Hyung-nim—is that why you're entering the tournament, after all? The champion this year receives the Millennial Earth Milk, yes? With that in hand, it's said even reaching S-Rank by unblocking your ki and blood channels becomes possible…!”
Millennial Earth Milk.
I had no idea what that was, but Lao kindly explained.
“It is the Legendary Gutter Water.”
“Ahh…! Exactly what this Oinoi has been searching for, it is…! With the Legendary Gutter Water, Oinoi could raise the typhoon cloud even without the Typhoon Flower, she could…!”
Whoosh—
Oinoi thrust her hand into the air, absolutely overjoyed. My mood brightened too. Coming to China really was paying off!
Soon, Lao glanced around cautiously and murmured a few words under his breath.
“And this is only a rumor, mind you. But they say that if a man wins this year's tournament, there may be one more special reward on the table. Namely… the right to hold the wedding ceremony with the Poison Bee herself, Xiaoxiao.”
That was startling news.
Lao had hedged it as mere rumor, but it didn't sound like a fairy tale to me. Was the plan to marry the tournament champion—a promising next-generation talent—to So So-hee, an S-Rank, for China's benefit?
Having come here after Auntie Dang Yeong-yeong asked me to save So-hee, I couldn't say I warmed to any of it. If So So-hee married here, she'd be tied to this land forever.
“So if I win, does the whole thing quietly fall through?”
I was a foreigner. From China's perspective, they wouldn't want to marry off their one and only S-Rank awakener to a Korean. If I won… wouldn't So So-hee naturally go free?
“I'd love to tell you that you'll win hands down, Hyung-nim, but it may be difficult. There are formidable contenders like Dang So-hae of the Poison Bees and Liu Hua, the Red-Faced Swordsman.”
Both were A-Rank awakeners, he said. Certainly no pushovers.
And that was exactly when it happened.
Buuuuung—
Something tickled my ears, and I turned to find fist-sized honeybees swarming all through the hotel room. Had someone left a window open?
As I craned my head around, Lao went pale with panic.
“Th-these honeybees are Dang So-hae's…!? That coward…! Graaagh…!”
Lao was stung by the swarm and passed out. Anaphylactic shock from bee venom?
I scrambled to administer first aid of every kind I could think of, but then someone stepped into the room and gave a soft, ho-ho laugh.
“Who said anything about poison bees? Anyway, there's no need to be so alarmed. It's a sleeping venom. He'll wake up in an hour. If anything, it's a mild toxin that washes all the fatigue out of the body—so the one you should be thanking is me.”
“You are….”
She was a woman with faintly violet-tinted hair, gathered up and pinned with a single ornate hairpin. She wore a black qipao embroidered with a golden centipede pattern that looked faintly familiar.
It was styled just like Auntie Dang Yeong-yeong's clothes.
“Are you Dang So-hae?”
“What an honor, being recognized by a celebrity. You know your little bout with Lao here is making quite the racket on the murim's social media? That's how I knew you'd be here.”
So she'd seen it online and tracked down the hotel where Lao was staying.
“Ha Ildo. Make a deal with me. That's why I came.”
“A deal? What kind of deal?”
“You came here because of So So-hee, didn't you? That's why you're entering the tournament. Fine. I'll help you win it. In return, I want you to take So So-hee back to Korea with you. Mutual benefit—simple as that.”