09. Foxkin Like Fried Tofu, So Do They Like Married Men Too? Augh, Rat-Faced...
'Souls of Bravery'—yeah, that was exactly the kind of game it was. If you asked whether it was a god game or a turd, I'd say it leaned hard toward the turd side, a total half-baked mess. Sure, no heavy plot twists, bright atmosphere, no real depth to the story... It was like instant ramen compared to a rich meat broth.
And yet, the grind for leveling, recruiting companions, farming items—it dragged on forever. My first playthrough took 144 hours. Does that even make sense? Back in my past life, I had a job... In that precious little free time, I cut back on sleep, pouring weeks into that one game.
And the ending? 'Sorry, I like girls.' You could pair up with whoever had the highest affection at the end, so I'd maxed it out with that pink-haired twerp. Of course, my fault for not reading the guides properly.
"Puhahaha, ahahat, ahahaha!"
The fact that this world was that shitty game? It was so damn hilarious I couldn't hold back the laughter. Or was it unpleasant? Thanks to the perception alteration, I couldn't even tell what this feeling was exactly.
Hmm... Anyway, realizing it now wouldn't change a thing. I'd already accepted the mission. Plenty of time left, but I had to kill Lily Claudia, the Claudia Archduke's daughter, no matter what.
Whether it'd be easy... who knows. As I said before, Lily Claudia was a powerhouse.
Souls of Bravery was a turn-based JRPG where you could form a party of five. Out of all those characters, it recommended including at least three essentials: the player hero, the GOAT healer saintess, and the spirit swordswoman with insane melee DPS that outshone even the hero.
And that spirit swordswoman was Lily. Her base attack and defense stats topped the hero's, her spirit arts provided solid ranged utility... but the real killer was her broken trait.
The game slapped traits on characters like some Pokémon knockoff, and those three had the most OP ones. That's why users were told to always slot them in.
If that 'trait' manifested the same way here in this world... yeah. Frontal assault? No way. Assassination? Probably a nightmare too.
My eyes caught a line in the request scroll.
"When assassinating the target, using a honey trap is recommended... huh. Hng."
In the game, she'd said she liked girls. The scroll mentioned it too... And conveniently, I'd woken up in this world in a girl's body.
My gaze drifted to the full-length mirror in the room. Jet-black hair contrasting porcelain skin. Blood-red eyes that felt eerie yet alluring. My build was toned from training... and all the parts a girl should have were there. My chest was a bit lacking by my standards, but...
Makes it easier to move as a ninja, right? Cheers to that! Anyway, with looks like mine, a honey trap should totally work.
After becoming a ninja, Kasumi had trained me in seduction too. Said Inari's kunoichi—female ninjas—had to master temptation. Foxes have always lured foes with sly smiles, or whatever...
Never tried it in the field, but hey... it'll work out somehow!
Plan set: Head south. Infiltrate the archduke's estate... Lay the honey trap on Lily Claudia, lure her into dropping her guard. The moment she shows an opening, slit her throat without hesitation.
......
......
And from there, it's all bonus. Honestly, ever since learning this world was Souls of Bravery, I've been so pissed off it's hilarious—laugh-out-loud furious.
Even Raijin's ramblings about war made a twisted kind of sense. In this land, even our tiny clan loses thousands of kids every year. So why do you lot get to adventure, chase romance, build bonds, and live happily ever after?
Ah, sure, I'm happy. Ever since I sliced those "friends" I thought I had... I've accepted that carving people up is my life's joy.
But I didn't want happiness like this from the start, you know?
Heh... So I want to steal it. Crush it, shatter your happiness.
Proclaim its end with my blade's edge in your lives.
Then my life gets a little richer, happier... Of course! Sending people to the next world is my bliss now.
So, yeah... All of you? Total annihilation.
I just decided that.
"Ahahat, ahat, puhuhu... Puh, hehufufufuhaha!"
And so, in some northern land, the Shinigami's laugh—or was it a wail?—echoed wildly. That laughter foreshadowed the blood-soaked waves soon to crash in the south.
"So, why'd you call me here?"
"Eeeh, help me plan the details! You're like my master, right, Kasumi?"
"I've never been the master of a ninja dropout like you."
"Who the hell qualifies as a ninja by your standards?!"
Kasumi's finger shamelessly pointed at herself. Then probably the chief, excluding me. Geez, what a picky old hag.
I'd come to her for advice on the next steps. Bluntly, I was great at charging in and straight-up murdering targets... but plotting infiltration and assassination? Not much experience.
Sure, I could've pulled it off... but why use your brain when overwhelming force works? It's just tiring.
But Lily Claudia probably had even more overwhelming power than me. So...
"You've gathered intel on the target, I see."
"Wha..."
"That's why I told you—be careful."
"Mm, yeah... She seems crazy strong. Planning to drop her guard, then snip-snip, done."
"Dropping her guard—got a good plan for that?"
"Mm... The scroll mentioned it, but how about a honey trap?"
How could I read the face of a masked Kasumi so easily...? Scary, my insight!
For the record, what I read was: half ridicule ('You? A honey trap?'), 25% shock, 25% disbelief. Way too harsh—I'm a total cutie!
"It's not your face; you lack seductiveness... Reflect on your usual behavior."
"You didn't say a word... Spare me the mind-reading."
"Funny... You read my face, yet complain about a loose tongue."
"Ahem..."
"But it's not a bad scheme. From the intel, that Claudia Archduke's daughter has a pathological obsession with pretty faces. Behavior aside, your looks are top-notch—even I admit that."
Nice... Honey trap approved.
Now, how to connect with Lily Claudia... seduce her into a slip-up. And since it'd be a long game, securing a base...
Any ideas?
I shot Kasumi a pleading look.
"Use your voice... Did you swallow your manners?"
"Eh, you'd read it with mind-reading anyway."
"...Tempted to smack you. Fine... You gathering intel beforehand and asking my help—it's progress toward being a proper ninja. Glad to advise."
"Oho."
"Infiltrate the Archduke's estate as a servant."
"Servant?"
"Southern custom... Ever heard of maids?"
...Of course. As I've said many times, my past-life self was a total weeb. No way I wouldn't know. Calling your master 'Master♡' and going 'moe moe kyun.' Drawing hearts on omelets, adding 'nyan' to sentences...
"No idea what you're imagining, but it's not that ridiculous."
"Ahahat, good... If it was, I'd have sent you to the afterlife. Was seriously considering it."
"Hmph... Kill me, and the perception alteration on you unravels. Fine with that?"
"......"
"Pathetic. Can't overcome that fear—that's why you're ninja trash. A true ninja stays calm, emotionless, and strikes."
"Pfft, you're the one who made me like this."
"Better to forge a half-baked talent than waste a rare gem."
I got what Kasumi meant. In trials, awakening all five elements plus aura? Super rare. Only one since me, in ten years. Still an apprentice, being honed by her.
Basically, churn through ten thousand kids for one proper ninja foundation. No wonder she didn't want to lose talent.
Back then, I was weak-hearted: 'I'll die for the others.'
"Your cohort was a real shame—two with full foundations."
"…………."
"If not for the ancestor's rule of one ninja per trial, even that white-haired kid... Hey, don't flare killing intent like that."
"Oops, my bad."
You say the funniest shit, hag. Stirring up murder vibes...
Not angry, though. Perception shift dulled most negative emotions into cheer...?
"Anyway, maid, huh...? They hiring?"
"Recruiting till next month. Big estate like that needs constant staff—never enough hands."
"Hmm... Thanks, that'll help."
"Heading out now?" Kasumi asked as I turned to leave.
Yeah... Deadline's next month. Southbound trip takes time too.
Eh? What's with that expectant look on Kasumi's face...?
...Ah.
"Want a souvenir on the way back?"
"Something sweet to go with matcha."
"......And if not?"
"Then fried tofu will do."
Tsk, her fried tofu obsession...
TMI, but Inari foxkin? Most love anything with fried tofu. Even me. Never touched it past life, but eh...