Chapter 138
Chapter 138
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 138
Chapter Title: Confession (2)
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A crazy human.
I stared at the reply for a long time.
What the hell was I supposed to say to that? I was aware that I'd been stubborn.
I furrowed my brow in thought, then decided to just pretend I hadn't seen it.
I brazenly said what I wanted to say.
[Me: When are you available, esteemed Senior?]
This time, the reply came only after Kal had arrived.
[Ricardo: In three days.]
I'd have to spend three days in terror.
I set my phone down by the window and greeted the senior entering the hospital room.
***
Kal Dow.
Hessi's master. A man of few words with short black hair, deep blue eyes, and a voice like gravel. He was deeply respected by Hessi and had a good reputation. Ami had explained that the more she got to know him, the more she realized he was the real deal. Yoon had said his skills weren't exceptional but that he was a reliable junior.
I hadn't worked a mission with him since the day I'd gone to the Library of Beginnings.
So I didn't know much about him. Thanks to that, it felt strangely easy to convey the facts.
I gave him a concise summary. My true identity and the reason I was revealing it to him.
Kal sat there with his arms crossed, silent until I finished.
When the story ended, he broke the silence in a low voice.
"If all this is true, then why don't you leave the Core?"
This was the question he chose to ask.
I'd expected him to inquire about why I'd betrayed them or my connection to the level-10 Creature.
I looked at the senior, whose expression was unreadable.
"To kill my own kind with my own hands."
Kal fell silent.
No signs of life in the hallway on this night.
The quiet murmur of our conversation seemed to echo loudly in the air. The crisp freshness unique to night air. The hospital room reflected in the window.
Kal Dow had an atmosphere like this night, with darkness quietly settling in.
He, reminiscent of an early summer night, asked again.
"To take responsibility for what you've done?"
"Yes."
"So that's why you stubbornly took the exam?"
His blue eyes turned to my burn scars.
I nodded and lifted the corner of my mouth.
"Yes. I'm aware that was wrong."
"I won't ask why you betrayed us. It wouldn't change anything even if I knew, and it'd just stir up your insides."
Huh?
My mouth fell open at the unexpected words.
He was letting it slide this easily?
I'd never thought he'd come at me aggressively, but I hadn't expected him to accept it so readily either. There wasn't that much trust between us. We'd only been together for a short time.
How could he react like this?
"But I doubt you could face your kind without hesitation and kill them."
I froze at Kal's words amid my surprise.
Clear, blue eyes.
They pierced through my golden ones.
"With that look on your face."
Ah.
Yeah. Of course.
I would've had the same doubts myself.
Yoon had harbored the same suspicions, gotten angry, and grabbed me by the throat. It was a natural question, if anything.
In a way, it might've been stranger if he hadn't asked.
But I had an answer for this.
I met the eyes of the senior I didn't know well.
"It's less painful than watching my kind die by human hands."
Understanding dawned in Kal's eyes.
Sympathy, too, probably.
I pretended not to notice.
"Does that answer your question?"
Kal nodded.
Then he sank into his own thoughts for a long while.
Until he said he understood and rose from his seat. He kept his eyes downcast as he stood from the chair.
He moved without a sound.
"Next time, we'll meet outside the Core."
"Please take care of me, Senior."
Kal nodded and left the hospital room.
And that was the end of it. Unlike Ami, who sent a message the next day saying, 'I had so many questions I went to ask Oppa, and he got super annoyed,' there were no follow-ups.
According to Ami, Kal was a soldier to his bones and never questioned orders from the command staff.
Was that why he hadn't asked about the betrayal?
Either way, I was relieved not to have to recount the story that burned like fire in my gut every time.
Ray's dream made me clutch my face and stifle groans every time I woke up.
***
When Ricardo came to visit, I was one day away from discharge.
The nurse had just changed my IV. I'd finished dinner and cleared the tray, so unless something came up, it was evening time with no need to call the medical staff.
That's when Ricardo opened the door and entered.
He was in a sharp suit.
"Where have you been?"
I blinked at his tall, polished figure as I asked.
But he didn't answer. He firmly closed the hospital room door and strode over to stop by the bed.
Before I could even speak, he grabbed the top of my patient gown and yanked it up.
"Privacy!"
I yelped in shock and twisted my body toward the window.
"Respect my privacy!"
"You force your way through the exam and now you talk about privacy~."
Ricardo grinned, his eyes crinkling.
A smile oozing menace.
Things felt ominous from the start.
His mood already looked foul, and we hadn't even begun. This wasn't good.
I looked up at the senior with frightened eyes and pulled my gown back down fully.
"What's a lab rat?"
The man, who'd been eyeing my scars while I adjusted my gown, muttered.
I smoothed my clothes and smiled faintly.
"That's what they call Badgers."
Ricardo snorted.
Then he stretched out his long legs and dragged over the nearby chair meant for visitors. A metal chair prepared for guests. He slumped into it lazily, crossed his legs, and leaned back against the backrest. I silently watched as he fought the urge to pull out a cigarette.
This is driving me crazy.
How was I supposed to bring it up?
Terror rooted me in place. I didn't even notice him staring at me intently.
It was only when Ricardo spoke that I snapped to.
"So?"
"Pardon?"
"What do you have to say~?"
Ah.
I pressed my lips into a thin line and looked at the senior.
Jet-black hair and long eyes. Sharpness emanated from his wrinkle-free, perfectly ironed suit.
I took in those features and just opened and closed my mouth for a long time.
"What are you doing?"
Ricardo raised an eyebrow.
Scary.
Trembling, I quickly apologized.
"I'm sorry."
"Run out of things to say all of a sudden? Should I leave so you can rest easy?"
"No. I mean."
If I hesitated more here, I was really in trouble!
Anxiety gripped my heart. An immense pressure built, and words spilled out.
"I'm not human."
Raised eyebrows.
Then silence descended. Stillness. The sound of vehicles through the closed window was crystal clear in the heavy quiet. The air felt utterly different from when I'd confessed to Ami or Kal.
The silence choked off my breath.
Terrified, I couldn't even meet the senior's eyes.
Ricardo spoke slowly.
"Then what are you?"
He didn't seem that angry yet, right?
The inscrutable tone terrified me, but I mustered courage and turned my head.
His clean face came into view. The senior wore no particular expression.
That made it even more menacing, but now there was no escaping it.
I squeezed out the courage that was about to crumble.
"A Creature."
Another long silence.
Was it always like this?
Did suffocating stillness follow every word I said?
Where had my life gone wrong?
Lost in heavy self-loathing with my head bowed, Ricardo's voice reached me.
"Humanoid?"
I looked up.
I stared at the man across from me with wide eyes. I still couldn't read his emotions.
I just felt his burning green gaze.
I nodded without avoiding it.
"Yes. Exactly. The humanoid Creature I asked you about before."
"Who said that?"
Another question came immediately.
Hesitation would make it worse, so I quickly added.
"No one told me. I remembered it myself. Some of my memories have come back."
"And in those memories, you're a humanoid Creature?"
"Yes. To be precise."
I shot a glance at the expressionless senior.
A memory I'd replayed dozens of times in daily life since talking with Ye-hyeon. I couldn't recall the beginning and end on Earth, but I remembered the end of the world where I'd been born and raised.
"I came from another world."
The world tree blazing like the sun and the crumbling earth.
"Born and raised elsewhere, I came to Earth through a Portal."
More silence.
But I no longer trembled in fear. The emotions that had gripped me were drowned in loss.
My world had collapsed long ago. My Earth memories hadn't overwritten those from that world. Yet the sense of loss lingered there, endlessly tormenting me.
A world I'd loved with all my heart, even if it hurt.
The senior's voice pulled me from wandering through memories back to reality.
"By your account... that level-10 Creature came from the same world as you-?"
"Yes."
I'd end up talking about Ray after all.
Even braced, the pain didn't dull, and my voice caught slightly.
"He was my friend."
The green eyes closed and opened.
Bewilderment filled the long eyes. Ricardo straightened from leaning on the chair.
"Friend?"
That was the thought that hit me the moment I heard the senior's voice.
It wouldn't be odd if he struck me right then...
Resigned, I nodded.
"Yes."
"You call that a friend? You were friends with that unidentified thing from the video?"
"Yes.... I'm sorry for not telling you sooner. It was top secret..."
"If that's true, what are you thinking, staying under Ye-hyeon?"
The sharp interrogation came.
Emotion finally colored Ricardo's face for the first time. He scowled and glared at me.
Disbelief, suspicion, irritation, anger.
Yes. This was the normal reaction.
I didn't avoid the green gaze that seemed ready to flay me.
My gut twisted at the next question, but I managed my expression.
"Under the human who killed your friend?"
Probably, without a doubt,
I'd only escape this pain after dying by my own kind's hand. After taking responsibility for what I'd done, finishing it, and atoning in a way that could never truly atone.
Until then, I had to learn to live with this pain.
I smiled bitterly.
"I betrayed my own kind."
Ricardo listened with his mouth shut.
"The black sword in the video is mine. I handed it over to humans as a means to oppose Ray."
As expected, he was silent for a long time.
I watched him and waited for a response. He seemed to be mulling over the facts I'd poured out. His head was bowed, finger tapping his chin.
Like Ami and Kal, he'd reach his own conclusion and respond.
Don't be surprised if he hits me. Honestly, it's a miracle no fist has flown yet.
As I thought that and watched the dripping IV, a low mutter came.
"So that's why you vomited your guts out at the Colosseum~? Same context outside the Core?"
"Ah, yes. Exactly.... I'm sorry for lying to cover it up. I didn't have permission then..."
"Why did you betray them?"
The senior looked up.
A gaze sharp as a blade.
I struggled not to be devoured by his eyes as I answered.
"I don't remember."
Ricardo blinked.
"That part alone... no matter how hard I try, I can't remember."
The senior didn't move.
Silence settled. Heavier than before. Air that instilled fresh terror into my half-resigned body after spitting out the truth.
He'd speak again after another long pause.
As I let my gaze drift into space with that thought, Ricardo's returned words wounded me.
"Still got more lies left, huh~? You don't remember why you betrayed them..."
A scoff slipped from the senior's lips.
The words that followed roughly tore at my heart.
"How convenient~...."