Light Steps and Looming Shadows
Half-lidded eyes, tousled hair.
"...School. Gotta go."
Han Seol was usually the first to arrive at school, earlier than anyone else, but today she'd slept in uncharacteristically. As she brushed her teeth, her mind wandered back to yesterday—the movie they'd watched, the meal they'd shared, the paths they'd walked side by side. Every time those memories surfaced, her chest felt strangely tight. She'd tried to sleep, but the thoughts kept swirling, keeping her awake. She spat out the water with a ptui.
Staring into the mirror, she saw the exhaustion etched all over her face.
...Today's schedule.
Recalling her timetable snapped her into action. She washed her face vigorously, hoping to inject some life into her weary features. She couldn't let her senior see her like this. After all, he liked her, and she had to live up to those expectations. Plus, he was her fan—even if he didn't know her true identity. As someone with fans, she wanted to show him her perfect side.
With her rationalization complete, Han Seol began picking out her outfit, just like she had for their movie date. She was a college student, after all; a little dolling up was fine... necessary, even. Soon, fully prepared, she stepped out the door.
Going to school wasn't exactly a joy for most people—probably. But today, her steps felt inexplicably light. The sunlight shattered into piercing rays that scorched her retinas, and a sweet scent seemed to ride the breeze. She was happy. She'd never imagined simply stepping outside could feel this good—not in reality, not in her virtual world.
Someone was waiting for her. Someone was by her side, someone trusted her. Just that was enough to dissolve all the painful memories she'd carried. Only joy remained.
She arrived at the lecture hall with brisk steps, and there was her senior, in his usual assigned seat. Emotions welled up, swirling in a vortex. Her senior, who liked her. Who took care of her, who became her first fan. She couldn't hold back—she approached him.
"Hello, Senior. Did you get home okay the other day?"
"...Uh, yeah."
He responded after a slight delay, as if he'd been dozing. His greeting was always the same: a faint smile and a casual hand wave.
Han Seol wasn't the type to smile easily. Blank expression or furrowed brow—that had been her life. But ridiculously, just seeing him now brought a subtle smile to her lips. Subtle enough that no one else would notice.
After a brief exchange, she sat beside him.
Will he watch my stream tonight and enjoy it? Does he get excited with me sitting right here?
Even as the lecture began, her mind was filled with questions about him. What was he thinking? Why did he like her? She wanted to know—about his feelings. What love was. What liking someone felt like, what romance entailed. Subjects she'd never pondered before, which only fueled her curiosity.
Lost in those thoughts, she zoned out, and before she knew it, the lecture was wrapping up.
"Everyone, the semester's almost over, right? Another term comes to a close. You've all worked hard."
...End of term.
The words pierced her ears, even though she'd absorbed zero content moments ago. Right—finals were already done. She'd completely forgotten, too preoccupied with streaming.
The professor droned on with generic well-wishes, but that wasn't what mattered to Han Seol now.
If I skip school over break... I won't see Senior for months...?
School was the only link between her and Suhyeon Yoo. Sure, there was streaming. But virtual and real worlds were separate. She wanted to meet him in both—as Rie and as Han Seol. He meant that much to her.
She didn't know where her feelings were headed, but for now, she just wanted to be with this good person. Someone being there for her lonely self was rarer than rare—maybe back in elementary school, at best. She didn't want to let this chance slip.
But she had no way to make it happen. No connection beyond school.
The lecture ended, and a wave of liberation rippled through the room. Her neighbor felt it too. Han Seol didn't like that. She felt regret, so why was he so nonchalant? He liked her that much—did being apart make him happy?
It frustrated her. Dark clouds gathered in her emotions.
Suhyeon stretched languidly and stood, turning to her.
"Good job this semester."
"...Yeah."
A perfunctory exchange. Was this it? Months without seeing him. Streaming and reality were different. Fan and senior— she didn't want to lose either.
So she tested the waters, grabbing his arm as he turned to leave.
"Senior."
"Yeah?"
"What are you doing over break?"
"...Dunno?"
He tilted his head at the sudden question.
"Why?"
"Well..."
She needed a connection. Recalling what she knew about him.
He likes me... takes good care of me, does favors without complaint...
"I want to make break meaningful... You're kinda famous at school for good grades, Senior. So I thought I'd ask—how should I spend it?"
"...I see...!"
As expected, he lit up at the chance to help. That had to stem from his feelings for her. She amped up the pitiful expression.
"Yeah. No one else to ask but you..."
"Got it..."
His face fell at her downcast look. She hadn't planned to exploit her situation like this, but desperation breeds ingenuity.
Suhyeon pondered briefly, then nodded vigorously.
Yes!
She clenched her fist discreetly, out of his sight.
End of semester. How sweet those words are.
I had plenty to do over break, but the ring of that phrase still had a magical way of soothing the soul.
I'll watch Rie's streams while doing my thing.
Exciting. Once my tasks were done, I'd hole up at home without stirring. I'd already stocked up on food for the plan.
Just break left now, and it's official.
But...
'No one else to ask but you...'
One more thing added to my plate—not ideal. Self-inflicted, though. I'd been the one looking after her all semester. Probably no one else she could turn to; she'd always been a loner.
So we agreed to meet briefly over break. Career advice, sort of. My grades were decent, and I had random knowledge to share—should help a bit. We'd gotten close anyway, and helping a junior was no big deal.
I just made sure it didn't clash with Rie's streams. Even for a favorite junior, missing Rie's broadcasts would breed resentment. Best to avoid that drama.
Schedule sorted, I flopped onto the bed. Mostly Rie stream slots. Yeah, time to rest.
Thinking about it, things got hectic since Rie entered the VTuber Academy auditions. Junior stuff, group projects, Rie's streams—no breathing room.
I'd nap for a bit. Fluffy pillow, cool air shielded by warm blankets. Ah, bliss.
Ding!
Who was ruining my peace now? Notifications blared from my phone.
Ding! Ding!
Irritated, I shoved off the covers and sat up. Sweet sleep had been this close, but it vanished.
Grabbed the phone. Vowing eternal grudge.
A few texts.
...Fuck.
My heart raced. A chill slithered down my spine.
I fired back quickly.
Her words carried real pressure. Daeun Group. Founded 30 years ago, a conglomerate that wrote legends. And she was the daughter of its founder, the chairman. Finding one person was child's play.
My head already throbbed.
No choice—I sent the location of a nearby café. No point resisting anymore. She'd find out eventually, and dragging it out would be worse.
This is why old ties are exhausting.
Our relationship had been downright awful. Like dogs and monkeys—mutual incomprehension, the worst kind of rift. That's what it was with her...
How did it come to this...?
I collapsed back onto the bed, sighing deeply.
Seohyeon was on her way. Soon.