Worse Than Strangers (3)
Lately I'd been sensing that he was avoiding me, and it left me feeling hurt. And I could already guess, without needing any proof, that Woo-bin was the reason.
But I didn't let myself be certain.
Because I wanted to believe it wasn't true. Because I thought Minjae wasn't the kind of person who would avoid me over something like that.
But yesterday, Woo-bin told me.
That Minjae had made it awkward for him to see me. That he'd run into Minjae on the street by chance and been told to break up with me.
That Minjae had put him down, calling his behavior trashy, painting him as some kind of weirdo…
Having suffered that humiliation right in the middle of the street, in front of so many people, Woo-bin had snapped at me as he relayed the whole thing.
That was when certainty settled in. Minjae didn't like Woo-bin.
I couldn't understand what gave Minjae the right to say something like that to him, and my anger shot straight to the top of my head.
I felt humiliated too. The thought that my own friend had stuck his nose where it didn't belong and caused Woo-bin trouble made me feel ashamed by association.
So I went to confront Minjae. Honestly, I hadn't planned on getting that angry from the start.
But then Minjae suddenly blew up at me.
He came at me spouting nonsense I couldn't even follow. He didn't back down from the argument.
The Minjae I knew would have quietly let me win. But not today.
I think that attitude of his rubbed me the wrong way. So without even realizing it, I poured out all that rage.
Maybe some part of me thought that if I got angry enough, Minjae would back down the way he always did.
But Minjae looked like he didn't care if our relationship ended right then and there. He made no effort to hold back the anger rising in him.
And then he stood up and walked out.
I was the one who was supposed to be angry, wasn't I? And yet Minjae was the one reacting like that. Why? Over what?
The whole situation was so absurd that I threw one more line at his retreating back.
Minjae turned around and looked down at me.
There was a bluish bruise on his cheek. How long had that been there?
And he was saying Woo-bin had given him that wound.
Was it true?
Woo-bin wasn't that kind of person… He wasn't the type to hit someone and then act like nothing happened.
What I'd heard from Woo-bin in the first place wasn't anything like this.
Who was it? Who was lying?
While I was still turning that over in my mind, Minjae stormed out. He left me standing there without waiting for an answer — as if he had no interest in whatever conclusion I might reach.
Seriously?
He could just leave me like this? Minjae? We weren't that kind of relationship…
I was shaken.
The image of Minjae losing his temper in front of me wouldn't leave my head. The way he'd cursed at me in that raised, furious voice wouldn't fade.
It was the first time Minjae had ever looked at me like that.
A look as if he'd grown sick of me.
Like he no longer even had the energy to be tired of me, and was simply pushing me away. And maybe, just maybe, like he resented me.
Why? Why was Minjae looking at me that way?
But I couldn't keep staring at that expression of his.
Because something about it hurt.
Had I done that to him?
No — Minjae looked straight down at me as if to make sure I saw it with my own eyes. As if to force me to confirm what I'd made of him.
A strange emotion came flooding in so violently I thought I might lose my mind.
What was this? This strange feeling twisting in my chest.
Minjae was the one in the wrong. That was why I'd gotten so angry. Just moments ago I'd hated him.
I'd hated him because he seemed like someone who didn't want me to be happy.
So why, all of a sudden, was this strange feeling tormenting me from the inside?
I— I should just ask Woo-bin.
Obviously… Minjae had lost control of his emotions and lied.
And this weird feeling was probably just because I was so shaken. Because Minjae had suddenly yelled at me and left…
Yeah. Let's go with that.
Minjae was the bad one. Why couldn't he just act normal instead of suddenly blowing up like that?
You were the one who was wrong.
I came home and lay down in my room.
I called Woo-bin and told him what had just happened.
I hung up.
What was this.
What was this uneasy feeling.
Was it because of what Minjae had said? Was I seeing things that way now because of what I'd heard from him?
Something… about Woo-bin felt off.
We weren't even dating yet, but ever since last time he'd kept pushing to drink late at night, and that was starting to feel strange too.
He didn't consider my feelings at all anymore, and now he was even raising his voice out of nowhere.
Cold sweat ran down from my forehead.
Had my body already figured out that something was wrong? The cold sweat kept coming, and my chest grew tight.
My mind, deliberately ignoring those physical reactions, kept insisting that Woo-bin couldn't be that kind of person.
Obviously… it was because Minjae had said those things. That was why even I was starting to doubt him.
I lay on the bed and tried to sort through the chaos in my head.
But what was Minjae doing right now?
Was that really the end of it? Wasn't he going to contact me?
The thought crossed my mind, and a wave of gloom washed over me right after.
I didn't even understand why that gloom was settling into me.
If… if Woo-bin really was the one in the wrong, the way Minjae said… then what was I supposed to do?
Was Minjae… actually thinking this was the end between us? No, that couldn't be.
We'd just had a petty fight. We weren't the kind of relationship that ended over something this small.
We'd been together for years… the idea that a petty fight like this could end it was ridiculous.
Friends fight sometimes. We'd never even fought before. That was the impressive part, really… fighting like this was the natural thing.
Yeah. Let's think of it that way.
I forced a bitter smile alone.
But that smile felt like something I'd put on just to push back against a sudden surge of anxiety.
My head hurt like it was about to split open.
Something… I was starting to feel like I'd made a mistake. Nothing was certain yet, and somehow I already knew I'd messed up.
That feeling came over me in a cold rush.
Why did I do that.
It was only a what-if kind of worry, but the thought that Minjae might never come back to my side after today made my heart ache so badly.
My chest felt like it was about to burst.
It was almost funny — we weren't even a couple. And yet the thought that we might never be together again made my heart twist like this.
But Minjae wasn't just any friend… He'd been with me since we were little, the friend who quietly stayed by my side even when things were hard.
When my dad passed away, even at that young age, Minjae was the one who kept showing up and holding his place beside me.
And the thought that I might lose that Minjae… over one moment of stupidity… was unbearable.
Suddenly, my mind snapped clear.
Woo-bin? Was he really that precious to me? Of course not. I didn't even need to think about it that hard to know.
Why had I believed Woo-bin's words and not Minjae's?
I should have trusted Minjae more, obviously. I'd only known that guy for a few days…
So why did I do it. Why.
In the heat of the moment… yeah, that was it. Minjae had suddenly gotten angry at me. It got under my skin… and I just went and did it in a fit of temper.
I was wrong too, but Minjae was wrong as well.
Stop thinking about it. Nothing had been proven yet about who was telling the truth. Woo-bin could still be right.
No… even so, I should apologize. It wasn't completely over yet. I'd go to him first and say sorry.
Regardless of who was right, I'd apologize first and keep Minjae by my side.
Minjae would accept it. He always gave in to me. This time, too, when it came down to the final moment, he'd give in the way he always did.
As long as I apologized, we could fix the relationship. I'd talk things through with Woo-bin properly, and everything could still end as a happy ending.
Or maybe Minjae was feeling sorry toward me too. He'd gotten so angry, after all.
You idiot. You can't manage without me. Who else is going to look after you if I'm not around.
I'll be the bigger person and apologize first. All you have to do is accept it.
And then we'll go back to normal. Like nothing ever happened.
At some point, a bead of red had formed at my fingertip. I must have been biting my nails without realizing it.
I'd planned to apologize first the moment I saw Minjae today.
But… Minjae didn't come to school.
Why? Why wasn't he coming?
Should I try contacting him?
No… that would hurt my pride too much. Better not. It would look like I was the one clinging.
Maybe he was so sorry he couldn't bring himself to face me?
That had to be it. Of course… Minjae was going to give in eventually anyway, so why did he have to get so angry back then.
It was on the way home after the last class, walking with my friends.
He hadn't shown up for class — so why was he at school now, of all times.
The moment Minjae came into view, my body reacted before I could think. Probably because I was glad to see him.
So I almost called his name in a bright, unthinking voice — then swallowed it back down at the dark look on his face.
I carefully steadied my voice and called him softly.
"M-Minjae…"
But Minjae only glanced at me and immediately looked away. I'd expected him to stop in front of me, but he walked right past without a single moment of hesitation.
As he passed, I could still see the gloomy bruise on his face.
Thinking about it… there was no reason for a bruise like that. Not unless he'd actually been hit by Woo-bin.
I felt sorry for him. The feeling came over me all at once.
"He heard you… right?"
"What's going on? Minjae just ignored you…"
"Did you two get in a fight or something?"
My friends' puzzled voices rose beside me.
"I-I think so…"
It was all I could say.
I turned and watched Minjae's back as he walked away. I wondered if I should run after him right then and apologize.
But… his back looked like it held no lingering attachment at all.
Why…?
Was he really planning to cut me off?
Why……?
"Sigh… Seoa. You should treat Minjae better. Friends like that don't come around twice."
"Hurry up and make up~!"
"Want to go to a café? Why'd you fight? I'm dying of curiosity!! Spill the tea."