He Entered Me
He entered me.
"Mmm... Where am I..."
I felt my consciousness rising faintly to the surface. But I was still half-dreaming, half-awake, my body as heavy as a waterlogged clump of cotton. Even so, it didn't feel all that bad. As awareness returned, the things that had happened just a little while ago began to surface in my mind.
"Ah... It's been so long since I drank this much. And so freely."
I felt a faint smile tug at the corners of my mouth. It really had been. Drinking myself into a complete blackout in a mood this comfortable was something I hadn't done in ages. My eyes had closed at one point and I'd dozed off a little, but then I'd come to again and kept drinking. I'd cackled over nothing, shouted, completely gone off the rails.
It felt like I'd talked about every last thing under the sun. About how wretched my life was. Then a lecture on how they shouldn't go around isolating people and bullying them like that. And to the guy staring at me like I was out of my mind, I'd added the nonsense that honestly, at first I'd found him disgusting, but looking at him again he seemed like a better guy than I'd thought. All while smacking him a few times on the back.
"Heh heh heh..."
Wow... I really lost it. I'd gone completely wild on him. He was someone I normally would have been afraid even to meet eyes with, but for some reason, drinking with him today, every last wall around my heart had come down. And so, to a degree that even I found startling, I'd gone and acted all buddy-buddy with him without a shred of restraint.
But... that fact didn't feel all that bad. Right up until I clocked out, my heart had been so depressed I could barely stand it, yet thanks to the time I'd spent with him, my mood had lightened. Yeah. He really did seem like he wasn't such a bad guy after all. And it felt like he wouldn't torment me the way he used to, either.
I couldn't be certain, but something like that settled over me. So... the thought even crossed my mind that maybe everyday life would get a little easier from now on. He was young enough to be my little brother, and yet somehow I felt a sense of relief, as if a solid backer had appeared in my life. But then, all of a sudden, a strange feeling hit me.
"Ah... cold. Why is it so cold... huh?!"
I curled in on myself against the chill, and then I realized why I felt that way. My clothes... were gone. All I had on was a single pair of panties, and my hands could feel bare skin. The moment I registered that fact, my eyes snapped open. But even checking with my own eyes didn't change the situation one bit.
"W-why am I like this... and wh-where is this?"
I curled up tighter and looked around. I figured out where I was almost immediately. The utterly textbook scenery of a motel room. And not one anyone could ever call high-class — a shabby, musty room whose dingy feel made you wrinkle your nose, and I was lying naked on the bed.
Why... the hell am I here? In a panic I tried to call up the memories in my head, but the film had cut out at some point, and it refused to play the scene I wanted. In the meantime, someone who could give me a far clearer answer stepped out through the bathroom door.
"Huh? You awake, ajumma? Perfect timing."
It was Gangho. He looked like he'd just washed up — water dripping from his hair, his body still damp — and he had a cigarette clamped between his lips as he came out. The sight of him left me stunned.
"You crazy bastard. At least wrap a towel around yourself!"
"Huh? What're you on about? Why would I need to?"
He gave a short snort of a laugh, as if my words were absurd, and flicked ash into the ashtray on the table. And looking at him, I couldn't help but feel fear. Honestly, I'd seen it a few times before — his thing, swollen and angry. But I never imagined I'd be looking straight at it, head-on, like this.
And the way I looked right now was another source of that fear. Why... am I completely naked? I tried desperately to cover myself, but even the blanket had been shoved off the bed. And my clothes... were dumped in a careless heap under the very table where he was leisurely smoking and tapping ash.
I couldn't even begin to work up the nerve to go over there, grab them, and put them on. Hahaha. Hahahahaha. So my situation right now was that I'd opened my eyes naked on a motel bed, thrown in front of a fully erect man? In a woman's body, no less.
Fear was sliding past into outright terror. I had to admit I'd been cast into a situation so spine-chillingly frightening that the moment just before — when I'd been smiling faintly, reminiscing on the leftover haze of alcohol — felt like a lie. And so I repeated a mantra to myself inside my head.
Stay calm. Handle this calmly, Shin Hyomin. You're Yujin's dad. You're a man. This wretched misfortune may have left your body in this state, but you're a man. So face this situation like a man. You can do this.
Then I forced down the tremor in my voice and asked him,
"Why am I naked right now?"
"You got completely wasted, and while I was carrying you on my back you puked, so..."
"Don't lie to me! Your clothes and mine are both clean!"
"Ha. Not buying it, huh."
With that, he ground out the cigarette in the ashtray, tossed it aside, and spoke as if it were nothing.
"Well, it's exactly what it looks like. I took them off you."
"Why...?"
"You asking 'cause you don't know? Obviously so I can fuck you."
He was spouting something so vulgar and absurd as if it were the most natural thing in the world. The moment I heard that, I cursed the version of myself who, even for a second, had thought he might be a decent guy. Just how many more idiotic mistakes did I have to make before I was satisfied?
After being screwed over countless times, I was repeating it all over again. Among all the bastards I'd met in my life, this one's words and actions might well shoot straight to the top as the absolute worst — I shuddered and, at the same time, was seized by terror. So I shouted even louder, overdoing it.
"You crazy bastard. Are you out of your mind? Do you even know what you're trying to do right now? This is rape."
"What the hell are you talking about? Rape?"
"Yes! Rape! Non-consensual rape! If you don't want to rot in prison for a few years, get out of here right now."
Right. Stay calm and handle this. He was a delinquent who treated rules like garbage, but at the end of the day he was a working adult with a proper job. So he'd want to avoid a situation that put a red mark on his record. If I laid down the law and scared him like this, he wouldn't just charge in out of nowhere.
Good. You're doing fine. Keep it up like this and you can get out of here in one piece. But then it happened. He picked up his phone and hit play on something.
"Ajumma. You're really gonna have another drink with me, right?"
"Of course! Of course! Gotta have another round. Let's go! Let's get it!"
"And you said with your own mouth that you didn't mind going to a motel. You were kind of rambling, though."
"Yeah! What does it matter between guys. Motel, go!"
A crazy bitch's voice was playing. And unfortunately, it was mine. What... the hell had I done? It wasn't a fabrication or some devil's edit, either. Thorough to the last detail, he hadn't just recorded the audio — he'd filmed the whole thing as video.
In the footage, there was some stupid, miserable woman riding on his back, cheeks flushed, answering every word with excitement. And after setting the phone down, he looked at me with an expression that asked if I had anything more to say.
"For the record, you paid for the motel too. Want me to pull the CCTV as well? We can call that consent now, yeah?"
With that, he slowly started toward me. I flinched and edged backward. But the space I could flee into was vanishingly small. After retreating barely a few handspans, I was blocked by the wall at my back.
Cornered like that, I felt despair. At the same time, terror spread through me at the sight of him closing in. Goosebumps rose all over my body. My nipples, brushing against the hands covering my bare chest, sent a sudden sharp jolt through me, but I didn't even have the presence of mind to react the way I usually would.
I kicked my feet uselessly, trying to push farther back, but it was nothing more than a foolish thrashing against the wall. In no time he had climbed onto the edge of the bed. Don't come closer. Please don't come closer. But despite that scream in my heart, he kept coming, and in the end I squeezed my eyes shut and turned my head away.
I could feel it. That signature, overpowering beast-like scent of his. He'd clearly only washed up roughly a moment ago, and yet the smell seemed fundamental, something that wouldn't leave him. And the vivid Irezumi tattoos carved into his body, along with his muscles, closed in until they were right in front of me at near distance.
There was no vent or wall left between him and me now. He approached as if nothing in the world could stop him, and his first action was to seize my wrists.
"Ah— ahh!"
The two hands I'd been using so desperately to cover my chest, he crossed and pinned with one hand, then yanked them up high. Because of that my bare chest was fully exposed, and my tearful face was laid bare as well. Looking down at me from directly above, he spoke.
"Your chest... really is nothing. I can see why the female employees call you a little office guy. They're not wrong."
"No. Don't do this. This is really not okay. I don't want it."
"What? You don't want it? What are you saying at this point. Didn't you hear yourself consent earlier?"
"That wasn't what I meant! You know that! I was drunk! I don't want you holding me!"
I screamed it through sobs. Then he asked,
"Ajumma... are you a virgin, by any chance?"
"W-what?"
"Is it your first time? I'm asking if you're a virgin."
At that I flared up for a second and shouted,
"Of course not! I have a child— ah..."
I cut myself off mid-sentence and deflated. Right. It wasn't my first time. But that had been as a man. As a woman, it was the first. It absolutely was. And I didn't want to experience it like this. Wait. What am I even thinking? No — I had no intention of experiencing it at all, and no reason to!
Watching me like that, Gangho gave a short snort of a laugh and said,
"Then there's no problem, is there?"
"What do you mean no problem? I said I don't want it! I don't want it."
"Yeah? That's weird, then."
Tilting his head, Gangho pushed his face in so close it nearly touched mine. The smell of cigarettes hit me hard, and he said something I never would have expected.
"But why were you always peeking whenever I was fucking other women."
"W-what?"
My mind went blank. What was this bastard saying right now? Don't tell me... don't tell me he'd known that I'd been secretly watching through the vent? Looking completely triumphant, as if he'd already won, he met my eyes and said,
"You know what, ajumma? There's this strange kind of scent that comes off you. Doesn't seem like perfume or cosmetics. Something unique I can't put into words — subtle, but hard to forget. Weirdly, the female employees don't notice it at all. But the guys all say roughly the same thing.
And especially for me... it hits really strong. Where do you think I first picked up on it? The supply room. I smelled you coming through the vent and knew. Ah... so that's where you are. And you're peeking from there. Doing something weird while you're at it."
I'd been caught. Completely found out. I'd thought it was a secret only I knew, but he'd already been aware. That was checkmate. At the fact he'd pointed out, I felt stripped bare down to my very heart. And what remained was a hunted female body, and a powerful man fully erect and ready to devour it.
He said,
"I'd say that's enough that I'm not overreacting. So... shut up a bit and let's get on with it."
"N-no. That's a misunderstanding. Let me expl— mmph!!!"
In an instant my mouth was sealed. A fierce cigarette taste flooded my mouth, and I felt as if tar were seeping into my whole body. At that kiss... my eyes rolled back. This was a man. Not some worthless thing like the manager last time, freeloading clumsily onto my desire.
A real man had entered me. And with that fact, I realized I couldn't resist anything at all.