Call Me the Human Turret (1)

Anyway, maybe it's because they've prepared so thoroughly? Even with all the bullshit penalties and hardships unique to Hardcore Difficulty crashing down on me, I feel a solid confidence that I can clear this without a hitch.

Plus, from all the tests I ran on the 11th floor, I now know exactly how much punishment those orc bastards' bare bodies can take. And this time, I'm rolling out from the start with the absolutely beast-mode Wilson (30mm) and Pelican (20mm) mounted up, ready to go brrr. I even swapped the Pelican for the Alabong depending on the situation and let it rip...

The big three I just mentioned are such massive guns or need separate mounts that they've got this issue where I have to keep them in 'mounted' mode to fire. But for the rest—the light machine guns and rifles—I realized I can just summon them straight into my hands and carry ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠on. Suddenly, I'm rocking dual-wield light machine guns that surpass even the AKimbo setup.

"This is... a man's pride?" It sounds kinda cringy to say it out loud, but damn if it doesn't feel like pure, overflowing confidence.

And just like that—looking every bit the walking human turret—I step into the 12th floor...

"What, like a linked event or something?"

As the Status Window pops up like that, the scenery of the 12th floor lights up bright and clear. And wouldn't you know it—spreading out before me is a thick, lush forest straight out of Europe or America, the kind you hardly ever see in Korea.

To be precise, it's a forest with a wide road smack in the middle, perfect for wagons or trucks to rumble through, and right nearby is a makeshift camp that looks like someone was just camping out.

Seeing this, I can't help but nod in approval. Up until now, the Tower's been like, "Just smash every monster that shows up, no brain required." But this time, it feels like they're actually dropping some story into the mix.

From the looks of things, the concept here is me lying in wait and ambushing orc transport convoys solo to loot them. So now I'm seriously pondering the best way to pull this off.

But here's the thing—judging by the state of this camp, it seems like I'm not supposed to be alone. There should be other folks here per the setup. Yet it's just me. Super weird situation, right?

And the enemies? They're called "transport units," so obviously they're groups pulling wagons...

"What the hell am I supposed to do with this?"

No clue how they expect one guy to clear this. My head's tilting on its own.

But hey, silver lining: logically, taking down up to three transport units solo sounds impossible. As I'm mulling that over...

The nearby bushes rustle like crazy.

"Huh? Oh, so now you're up and maintaining alert status?"

"Scouted the area. No other routes for the orc convoy except that road ahead."

And out pop three classic fantasy adventurer types—the ones who should've been at this camp.

Of course, total strangers to me, so my first thought is, "Who the fuck are these guys?"

But that lasts only a second.

They look familiar yet with a slightly different vibe from the usual party member tropes. I nod—nice touch, Tower.

Plus, unlike the puppet-like dummies from hunter community vids or general forums...

"Orcs are transporting supplies via wagons, so they can't move off-road."

"Checked the surroundings—trees are too dense for forced breakthrough."

"Even my axe couldn't chop through 'em quick!"

"Hah? Wait—you hacked at those poor trees, you little runt?!"

"Whoa whoa, calm down, Mika."

"Hmph."

Just as the Status Window said—they're bursting with their own personalities and thoughts.

"Anything else? Like notable terrain features?"

"Nah? Oh, there's this random huge boulder right by the ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠road nearby."

"Ah, that boulder."

And when I ask something, they give spot-on answers, even sketching a quick map of the area.

Watching this, I get a thrilling buzz—these are no frustrating allied NPCs from hunter forums. They're competent.

Thanks to their terrain rundown, I've got a mental map ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠without scouting myself. Time to figure out how to wreck three convoys with these guys.

But my plan? From their perspective, it's straight-up "wtf for real??" material.

"Hold up—what'd you say?"

"You want us three blocking the road while you solo-wipe the convoy?"

"Yeah, totally doable."

"......The hell."

Yep. My genius idea: the trio holds the road at that boulder spot I mentioned. I climb the boulder and turn into a literal human turret.

Fantasy folks, so they're eyeing me like, "How's this non-mage gonna wipe a convoy solo?" Total suspicion.

But they got no better ideas either. And when I pitch it—follow this, no one gets hurt, chill wipe, maybe snag some "legit local requisitions" from the supplies—they grumble but accept. No alternatives.

If this were real life, they'd be like "Nah, don't buy ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠it!" with bullshit excuses, dragging me down or straight-up bailing. But as Tower NPCs and comrades, they snap to it professionally. Satisfying as hell.

Then the first convoy rolls up—rumbling wagon pulled by a massive lizard.

I tell the party-comrades: "Watch for any berserk chargers." Then, as the orc escorts aggro on the road-blockers and charge from the wagons...

"Hahahahahahaha! Eat rainbow barrage, motherfuuuuckers!"

-BRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

Just like I said before hitting the 12th—as my two mounted weapons plus two handheld light machine guns erupt in a four-barrel inferno of machine guns and autocannons. No mage here, but in one instant, I pull off the "magic" of turning about ten orc guards into Swiss cheese riddled with holes.