Even Now, No Certainty
Even now, I have no idea how this is going to turn out.
“Ahaha.”
Motteok-nim. Just… absolutely killing it.
I keep stealing glances at Motteok-nim. Just… ehehe.
Nothing but good words come out of my mouth.
Ah… ah!! It’s not because of the crossbody bag—it’s because she bought me delicious food!!
I’ve changed as a person. I can hold back bad thoughts now. I worked hard on it.
“Is it tasty?”
“Yes!! Ehehe.”
“This place is pretty popular, you know.”
“Aha!!”
Even a simple mackerel set meal can be this popular. If you pour your heart into one thing, you really can become a master.
You look so delicious, little guy. I’ll eat you so well.
I chew thoroughly and polish off every last bite.
“Eat slowly. You’ll get indigestion.”
“I’m fine. I really do chew thoroughly. I’m doing the sixty-chews method right now.”
“R… right.”
Whatever else I might not be, I am an absolute champion at chewing thoroughly. Habits are scary—I do it automatically without even thinking about it.
I don’t have to think. My body just handles it.
I take that gorgeous mackerel and absolutely demolish it.
Just… you should consider yourself lucky you got caught by Yu Seona. Getting eaten this deliciously, even a mackerel would be happy.
Looking forward to next time, mackerel-ya.
“Wow. This is seriously delicious!! Hundred points.”
“Hahaha… have some more.”
“I’m not eating any more. I stopped right when it was perfectly tasty. You have to stop at the peak if you want to leave with a good memory. If I keep eating just because it’s good, I won’t be able to eat it next time. Let’s treasure this as a good memory.”
I’m not eating any more.
You have to cut it off at just the right moment if you want to crave it again.
“Man… no, wait. I’m curious about something.”
“Ask away.”
“Did you talk this over with Nemmo?”
“Talk? Talk about what?”
“Just… about the content… did you discuss it together?”
“Ah~!! No? I got permission. Motteok-nim gave me permission!! Okay, it was proxy permission, but permission is permission!!”
“Not permission. Conversation. Actual talking.”
“We don’t have a script.”
I say it firmly.
Real agencies are so picky… so even stuff like this needs a script, huh.
I’d love to have a script too. But I can’t memorize the thing.
And I don’t have the ability to write one either. I’m specialized in thinking on the fly every single day and speaking without running it through my brain first.
The moment I start thinking… I can’t do it.
My whole body locks up. And even if I force it… the vibe just dies.
“What are you planning to do today? Do you have anything prepared?”
“Ah!! That I do. Today I want to learn RP. I was really moved. I’ve prepared a ton of RP myself, you know? But I don’t know how to keep it going.”
“Ah…”
“So today I’m going to learn properly and apply it.”
“Oho…”
“I’m going to learn in full serious mode. I’m going to absorb everything and show you my absolute best self.”
“Uh…”
Her voice sounds reluctant, but somehow a smile spreads across Motteok-nim’s eyes, all sparkly.
Hm? Did a good memory come to mind?!
“So do you have any RP prepared?”
“I do!! I prepared a lot.”
Today I’m going to share every single RP idea with Motteok-nim. I really thought hard about them.
I have preparedness too, you know~!!
First one is God. The one and only God. The God who has everything. The absolute best.
I stretch my arms out wide and wave them in a big circle.
“I literally have everything. For real. I’m God.”
“And how are you going to lead with that?”
“Lead what?”
“The stream.”
“Um… well?”
“Then the RP is just going to get abandoned again, isn’t it?”
“Ugh… facts.”
I admit it cleanly. I have no choice. The God RP sitting in my—Yu Seona’s—head was only a two-day idea at best. I hadn’t thought beyond that.
Actually a one-day idea. Or maybe even a one-hour idea. Getting hit right in the bullseye hurts my heart.
“Aigoo… you have to do something you can actually sustain.”
“Incredible. I never even thought of that.”
I wipe the sweat from my forehead and offer my deepest respect. Internally I’ve already clapped several times.
That’s how speechless I am.
But I have plenty of prepared RPs. Losing one or two is fine.
“Th… then I have more. I have lots. Second RP is… a king. A king. But a tyrant. Ten billion years old. Immortal.”
“Hmm…”
“So… um.”
Motteok-nim’s reaction is so lukewarm that my voice keeps getting smaller.
It was fun when I thought about it—I was giggling and cackling by myself—but the moment I try to say it out loud, it comes out wrong.
This is why you shouldn’t talk face-to-face.
When I can see the face… it’s somehow… hard to speak.
“Hmm… that kind of thing is pretty cliché.”
“Kugung…!!”
Cliché? Mo… Motteok-nim, you do Shape World and all that, and yet… I’m shocked!!
At my level it’s not cliché at all. It’s just solid. No, Shape World is cliché too. Cliché!!
“It’ll be hard, but why not push Forty instead?”
“Forty? What’s that? Jjang-Po-Ham?”
“Yeah. If you’re going to do something, push that one.”
“Hmm… that.”
“If you’re confident, go for it. If not, it can’t be helped—I’m not forcing you. But it suits you so well. Ah, but it is pretty intense, right? This is… tsk. Never mind.”
Did I do well? Getting praised makes me feel good.
But the thing about bringing out Jjang-Forty-Ham is… it gets old. It’s not fun anymore.
Coming up with ideas isn’t easy.
I do try thinking while lying in bed. If I were really Jjang-Forty, how would I talk to the ladies every day?
But… that only lasts a day or two. I can’t come up with new lines every single day.
“Really? For real?”
“Yes. It was amazing. The best RP I’ve ever seen.”
“That good?”
“It was a realm ordinary people can’t even approach. You pulled off something no one else could. You can be proud of that.”
“Ooh!! It was that good?”
I just said it casually… but now I’m completely hooked. When she goes that far… who wouldn’t get hooked!!
“Yes. It was the most sensational thing I’ve ever seen.”
That good? Hmm… well, she’s not wrong. Stuff like that gets high YouTube views too.
But there’s a huge problem!! The idea burnout is insanely fast.
It’s not easy. Coming up with the lines… those also come from all the various encounters with women in my delusions.
Thinking about content pushed all of that to the back burner.
“But… that’s hard.”
“Right? It is hard… if you do something like that and get caught wrong, it gets horrific.”
“Huh? That’s not what I meant. It gets old. Forty-Ham is fun for a day or two. If I do it every day I get sick of it.”
“What?”
“Huh?”
A communication error just happened. What’s the problem here?
“Wait. You’re saying you can’t do it because you get sick of it? Is that real?”
“If not that, then what?”
I scratch the back of my head and look at Motteok-nim. Of course I can’t do it because I get sick of it. What’s wrong with that?
Then Motteok-nim’s eyes turn sharp as axes.
Is this my fault again? Ugh… what did I do wrong? No matter how hard I think, I can’t figure it out.
Saying I can’t do it because I get sick of it isn’t a bad thing, right? There’s zero bad intent here.
I just… can’t do it because I get sick of it!!
“Because you get sick of it… that is so very Jjang-Ham of you.”
“Hiiing? Did I do something good?”
“No. You did good.”
“Good?”
“Good good.”
“Good good good!!”
Ahaha. What~ I almost misunderstood!!
Nice. I talked so much my stomach emptied right back out.
You leftover mackerel bastard… I won’t forgive you!!
“Ahaha.”
I laugh and absolutely demolish the rest of the mackerel.
Free food plus praise—my mood is excellent!!
Motteok’s feelings were complicated. She couldn’t tell how Seona felt about Nemmo.
It would be so much better if she could know for sure.
She simply had no confidence about exactly which route this was taking.
Whenever she carefully asked if Seona knew about Nemmo’s situation, Seona would answer with total confidence.
I know. Nemmo-nim is the God of RP.
Every time, Motteok felt stifled. No. That’s not it—I’m asking if you know Nemmo’s situation!! she kept screaming inside her heart.
It was a situation where getting involved carelessly could get you hurt.
Truthfully, Motteok wanted to stop the collab between Nemmo and Seona.
If things went even a little wrong, both of them could become hated—even in Motteok’s own streams, the same group, the moment Nemmo’s voice appeared the chat would get spammed with “Huk.”
If Seona, who had zero connection to any of that, got close to Nemmo, both of them could end up in an awkward spot.
But.
Seona didn’t think about any of that at all. She said it proudly instead.
Nemmo-nim is seriously the God of RP. I want to learn. I’m going to learn properly this time.
Motteok desperately wanted to ask just where the hell this “God of RP” title even came from.
But.
Seona always managed to pull through. She was a woman whose courage to be hated was maxed out more than anyone else’s.
Of all the people Motteok had ever seen, Seona was born with the qualities of a king more than anyone.
When people suddenly start cursing you out, anyone would panic. But Seona never grieves over being hated by anyone.
If Motteok had to evaluate Seona:
Doing brainrot every single day, and even when the chat is flooded with hate she isn’t scared at all—instead she laughs like she’s saying “You mad?”
If it’s acting then she’s a genius; if it’s genuine then she’s a lunatic—“a power struggle packed full of sincerity.”
And yet when she actually tanks hard she just silently plants her face into the ground without a single excuse—“decisiveness?”
A “rage-inducing power” that makes every single viewer grind their teeth.
And the occasional “purity” that ordinary people simply cannot understand.
She was a streamer who had all of it.
At first Motteok even suspected Seona was just enjoying the viewers’ reactions by tying herself to Nemmo’s incident—that’s how thoroughly she smashed through every line.
When boring content is pushed to the extreme it becomes comedy, and when being unlikable is pushed to the extreme it somehow becomes likable—she wasn’t walking the line, she was completely crossing it, so it almost felt like this was the correct way after all.
Even Motteok herself had no certainty about what would happen between Seona and Nemmo.
Whether this was right. Even at this very moment, as the stream was about to start, she still had no certainty about how things would turn out.