Drawing a New Line (1)
“…Huh?”
Huh.
When had I... fallen asleep?
What had I been doing...?
What time was it? Five... a little past five.
Had the sun just come up...?
My head felt fuzzy.
Where was I? I could see the ceiling.
A pink ceiling... pink?
This wasn’t the ceiling in my apartment.
No idea.
I just felt... good.
Like the kind of satisfaction you got after finishing something you’d worked hard at for a long time.
Not just mental satisfaction, either—something deeper, almost spiritual, and beyond that, a satisfaction that filled even my body.
My whole body was sending signals that said I was happy, that this felt amazing, that I didn’t need anything more as long as it stayed like this.
It felt like my brain was being tricked... like the satisfaction of being so full after eating something delicious, multiplied by dozens of times over.
A smile rose on its own. Ah, this was nice.
Yesterday had been incredible... Hm? What had happened yesterday? Did that really matter? The only thing that mattered was how good I felt now. Right?
I wanted to think of nothing, just stay exactly like this.
I wanted to keep being held in this embrace...
Wait.
Held?
“Hnnn... hhh... hm...”
Breathing.
Someone’s breath tickled my chest.
Someone was holding me close.
No, more precisely... we were holding each other.
I was naked.
A naked man had buried his face in my breasts.
I—I was hugging the man’s head with both arms.
The man had both arms around my waist.
I had my legs wrapped around his waist...?
It looked like—like we were... having sex.
Like that.
Like this, I’d slept...?
Fuck.
What the hell...?!
The Blessing washed my brain clean.
It swept away the mad, drugged-up mess in my skull—the bliss, the satisfaction, the state where every desire in my body had been reduced to zero—and then arranged my thoughts back into something sane.
The cold, clear mind that returned restored my muddled head completely and dragged me back into reason.
Ah.
Right.
We’d had sex...
After Kang Juhyuk got sulky all on his own, all but pouting, he’d forcefully raped me.
No... coming in here had been something we agreed on, but I was still planning to take the lead and make him do it my way.
Kang Juhyuk had gone on about some ntr bullshit and said that if I was going to treat him like a dildo, then he’d treat me like a sex doll too...
I’d honestly thought I was going to kill him then and there...
But at the end, for some reason.
For some reason, I hadn’t been able to just leave him there, crushed and dejected after being treated like a toy.
—If I let you really have your fill, then I’ll call you by name.
That’s what I’d said... and then I’d had sex with Kang Juhyuk.
This time, no matter how you looked at it... no matter how you thought about it, it wasn’t rape. It was voluntary sex.
Little by little, I started remembering. How I’d felt back then.
What kind of mood I’d been in while having that sex.
How cute. For a guy. Ah, right there, that feels good. Yeah. Keep pounding it like that.
Don’t be clueless... if a woman’s getting off, you don’t ask whether it feels good—you just finish the job like it’s obvious.
That’s how you take the lead in sex... Honestly. Virgins really are hopeless.
Wait... you can’t hold back that much? It feels that good? I told you to take it slow, and you’re already lunging at me...
No helping it... should I have them teach you a little? I feel everything no matter what, so I’m not much use as a practice tool...
...Crazy.
Insane, fuck... seriously?
No, really? What, what the hell. I... me?
Me—Chae Eunha, no, not Chae Haeun, but me, Choi Eunho?
I was seriously thinking all that while spreading my legs for Kang Juhyuk?
It wasn’t because I needed to.
No, it was true that I needed to if I wanted to recover the Blessing... but still.
Still, there was no need to do it here.
I’d already done it once, and if I didn’t like Kang Juhyuk, I had time enough to find someone else.
And yet... and yet I’d done it voluntarily.
I’d felt sorry for him, pitied him, and thought maybe I could just give him a little.
Crazy. Crazy... fuck, fuck...!!
Don’t be ridiculous, Chae Haeun! This was your doing too!
You—you did something, didn’t you?! Because of you I just... no, wait.
Ugh... fuck. Anyway, it had all been mixed together, right? There was no way I would’ve thought like this on my own.
Whether Kang Juhyuk looked dejected, pathetic, or whatever else... fuck, I should’ve just brushed him off as some loser bastard and moved on, not gone all... what, maternal?
What, I wanted to indulge in what I’d wanted to receive myself? No... crazy... no matter how I looked at it.
Right. Sex feels good. I remembered that it felt good, even now, right now.
As long as I was trapped in this sex-crazed alien body, what else was I supposed to do? Anyone would say it felt good.
So if it was voluntary, if I took the lead and did it proactively, then maybe I could have sex. It was something I had to do anyway.
But Kang Juhyuk had already... already crossed that line so many times. So at the very least, not with Kang Juhyuk. Absolutely not.
Then why had I... back then...
No, forget that. First.
First, calm down. Wash up, then think. For now, I had to let go of Kang Juhyuk... why was I even holding him?
I had fallen asleep in his arms. Disgusting. Fuck. But me holding him was strange, wasn’t it?
Ugh... I needed to get away first. Kang Juhyuk was clutching my waist so tightly...
Slowly, using the Blessing... I pulled my arms free—
Pop—
“Eek...?!”
F-fuck...?!
What the hell... had his cock been inside me? The soft thing had just slid out of my pussy.
Crazy, that bastard Kang Juhyuk... had he raped me again while I was asleep?
Wasn’t he completely out of his mind?!
Now that I looked, my pussy was full of semen... it was spilling over, and the sheets were covered in semen that had already gone sticky.
Just how much had he pumped into me... that crazy, crazy bastard...!!
Now I understood why my body felt so light, so refreshed, why my desire had dropped all the way to the floor, why I felt so damn good.
And at the same time, disgust came rushing in. So this was why I’d felt so good—because that bastard had face-fucked me.
It felt good, but... it felt awful!
I shoved Kang Juhyuk away with my foot. I didn’t want to be attached to him anymore, no matter what.
Disgusting. No, my body said it felt good. I felt awful.
The moment the warmth left my body, my flesh sent up signals of loneliness, but I ignored them.
Chae Haeun started whining to go back into Kang Juhyuk’s arms. Shut up, fuck. Just shut up.
“...Ah, Nuna... you’re awake?”
“You crazy bastard...! You fucked me while I was asleep?”
As I shoved Kang Juhyuk away and sat up, he seemed to wake too, rubbing his eyes as he spoke.
“Ah—ah, no. That’s... that’s not...”
“Then say it. Say it!”
“I—I was with Haeun noona...”
“...Haeun.”
Haeun noona.
Haeun noonaaaah!?
“Y-you bastard. You... you said you did what with Chae Haeun?!”
“S-sex... Haeun noona said I didn’t seem satisfied yet, so she told me to keep going as much as I wanted...”
Ha.
These damn bastards.
Doing whatever they wanted in someone else’s body while I was asleep...!!
Chae Haeun said this was my body too. Shut up! Shut up, both of you! Shut up, I said!
No way. Chae Haeun—could Chae Haeun have had sex behind my back? She shouldn’t have been able to do anything I absolutely forbade her from doing, right?
If she could, then why hadn’t she been sneaking out at dawn to have sex and coming back? Or... was that exactly what she’d been doing, and I just hadn’t known? Hiding the traces?
No... no matter how I looked at it... that couldn’t be right.
Unless I...
Unless I didn’t think that much of it being disgusting?
“Anyway... Eunha noona!”
Kang Juhyuk, naked as I was naked, came toward me and took both my hands in his.
I couldn’t react because it happened so suddenly. Or was I not reacting because there was no danger?
His hands were warm. This was affection. Something about it... something about it... wasn’t all that bad.
When his hands touched me, my body automatically remembered yesterday’s sex.
It was trying to persuade me this was a good thing.
Did he really think I’d fall for something like this?
“Noona, I like you! Please go out on a date with me!!”
...Ha.
“You fucking bastard...”
Disgusting.
Really, really fucking disgusting.
What, what the fuck... what, what...
In an instant, the feeling that this was nice, that it felt good, sank away.
I slapped his hands away at once and took a step back.
Seriously, really...
I stared at Kang Juhyuk with a look that said I honestly couldn’t believe this.
But Kang Juhyuk didn’t seem to care about my reaction, and with a face much more relaxed than yesterday’s, he scratched his head.
“Haha... guess I got rejected after all.”
“Wasn’t that obvious? Are you actually insane? No, wait. You are insane, which is why you trespass when people are asleep.”
“I-I didn’t trespass! It was with Haeun noona, so...”
“Shut the fuck up.”
A bitter laugh slipped out of me. I had no idea what the hell I was supposed to do with this bastard.
God, seriously. What the hell happened to me?
Why had I picked someone like this?
Why had I decided to use a bastard like this as my dildo?
No, wait.
I hadn’t decided that yet, had I? Last night had been the end of it, hadn’t it? This guy had been disqualified.
Or... had I decided on him after all? Wait a second. Something was off.
No, that wasn’t right. It wasn’t Kang Juhyuk, was it? I’d thought he was the one guy who absolutely couldn’t be it.
But in the end, I’d let him have me yesterday. I’d promised I’d call him by name. I’d given it up voluntarily.
I’d even said I’d introduce him to another woman later and teach him sex—that meant I’d decided to use him as a dildo, didn’t it?
No, but... even I couldn’t understand what I’d been thinking yesterday.
Chae Haeun suddenly poked her head up. The one I’d shoved into the unconscious reached out and peeked her face back out again.
Still, Juhyuk’s cock is big.
You crazy bitch. Is that what matters? Well... of course it’s not irrelevant when you’re gauging a man. But is your body some kind of body that judges a cock by size alone? Some bitch who’d think even a pathetic 5-centimeter shrimp dick was cute and adorable?
I’m in favor of Juhyuk. You liked it too.
I said I don’t care what you think. Don’t act familiar with me. Fuck. Get buried. Go away!!
My head was spinning.
There was no doubt something had gone wrong with me yesterday.
And yet... fuck. It was still strange now. Was it because of the lingering afterglow of sex left all through this body, the afterimage of satisfaction?
Was it because even with the Blessing washing my mind clean, the happiness still clung to my flesh?
The thought kept rising up: maybe it doesn’t matter.
Maybe Chae Haeun quite liked Kang Juhyuk.
Fuck. Of course she would. Some bastard whose brain was attached to his cock—an instinct-driven bitch like her would obviously love him.
But... wasn’t that maybe not so bad?
If Chae Haeun liked Kang Juhyuk... then as long as Kang Juhyuk did his job, maybe I could stop Chae Haeun from going berserk.
I’d thought about it for a moment yesterday. If Kang Juhyuk could train Chae Haeun to behave, at the very least it might stop her from going around spreading her legs for just anybody.
I’d assumed Chae Haeun wouldn’t be able to ignore my will and do as she pleased...
But if the two of them had been going at it so thoroughly while I was asleep... then maybe, in the worst case, that wasn’t true.
I hold this guy’s leash, and he holds Chae Haeun’s leash.
If I could draw that picture... it might actually be better than I expected.
Him constantly coming at me like some kind of thug was annoying, sure... but if I thought about the cause, there was a good chance I could keep him in line if I tossed him a bone.
Besides, he’d just said he liked me, hadn’t he? Which was a fucking gross thing to say, but he meant he liked Chae Eunha more than Chae Haeun.
Obviously I couldn’t date him, but maybe we could work out some kind of compromise.
God, I don’t know.
Maybe this was just because last night’s sex had been so satisfying.
Maybe my body was sending signals that it wanted to keep Kang Juhyuk around, and my mind just couldn’t stop it.
I was too thoroughly sated... maybe I was being too generous right now.
“Hey. Kang Juhyuk.”
“Yes!”
Kang Juhyuk was kneeling on the floor, both hands resting on his thighs, and at my words he answered loudly at once, smiling up at me.
At that expression...
...What, what was that?
No. No! No...
No, that couldn’t be. There was no way. No way.
Right. Of course. I, no—yeah. I was mistaken.
For a second, I’d misread the situation.
I’d only thought he looked like a bastard. Yeah. That was all.
“I’m going to wash up, so in the meantime think about what you want to eat for breakfast.”
“Uh, I have to go to work later.”
“Quit.”
“...Huh?”
“You’re coming with me. So forget whatever job you had. I’ll pay you twice what they did.”
“A-ah... yes, yes! Yes. Understood!”
Right.
You just need to keep listening to me like that.