Earth: Upon Waking, Park Chanyoung Was Gone
Is this what smokers mean when they say they’re dying for a cigarette? I’d always wrinkled my nose at the smell of tobacco, but right now, I got it completely. My head was a mess; I wasn’t thinking straight. If there’d been booze and smokes in front of me, I’d have downed the liquor and chain-smoked the pack in a heartbeat.
“Are you alright? There shouldn’t be any side effects at all…”
“…”
“Huh? That’s weird… It definitely worked perfectly.”
Baby Angel fluttered up to my eye level, waving her tiny hand in front of my face. I ignored her and focused on sorting through my thoughts. Denying reality or giving up wasn’t my style. Things had gone this far, so I had to make the best of it and fight for a better situation.
First things first…
“You said swapping bodies like this was problematic because it harms a third party, right?”
“Yes, that’s correct. Wishes like this cause direct harm to someone else, so they’re an issue.”
“As you know, I’m the victim here! So what’s the compensation for that? Don’t tell me there’s nothing.”
“No, there is! We’ll accommodate Baek Hamin’s—no, now it’s Park Chanyoung’s—requests to the fullest extent possible.”
Ha… The unfamiliar voice rumbling from my throat grated on my nerves. I swallowed my anger. This was crucial. She’d said they’d meet my demands as much as possible. That meant there might be a way to reverse all this.
“Fine. Here’s my demand: I’m not living in this body. At the very least, prepare one that looks exactly like my original. Transfer my soul into it!”
Asking for my original body back would obviously be a no-go. I wasn’t stupid enough to waste my shot on that. Second best, then. A body identical to mine would let me reclaim everything I’d lost. Even if there were two Baek Hamin’s in the world, proving I was the real one would be easy enough.
“That won’t work.”
“What? Why not!”
“Because the wish was ‘swap bodies with Baek Hamin.’”
“Ha…”
Frustrating, but I got it instantly.
“If the wish had been ‘let me live as Baek Hamin’ or ‘possess Baek Hamin’s body,’ that’d be possible. But…”
“‘Swap bodies with Baek Hamin’ means I have to live in Park Chanyoung’s body?”
“Exactly.”
True enough; no arguing there. That bastard’s wish included him living in my body and me suffering in his. Damn it! If that didn’t fly…
“Alright! Fine, appearance doesn’t matter—just give back all my relationships, test scores, social status, everything I’ve built up!”
“That won’t work either.”
“Why the hell not? That doesn’t violate the wish!”
“It’s… ambiguous. Devils grant the exact wish and don’t care what happens after, but as you know, we’re angels. We grant wishes with fair compensation, so we handle things as cleanly as possible.”
“So?”
“We can’t fulfill requests that go strongly against the wisher’s intent, even if unspoken. Park Chanyoung wanted ‘Baek Hamin to suffer like I did,’ so it’s impossible.”
Fuck! Isn’t that a stretch? Why do angels go out of their way to do unasked-for shit? A deal with the devil would’ve been better!
“Don’t misunderstand! We know this is wrong! But since it’s a world-saving wish, we can’t just fix everything outright…”
“Ugh…”
“So we can use a bit of a loophole—take time to slowly reclaim what you’ve lost. We’ll help with all we’ve got, of course.”
At least it wasn’t total despair. Worst case, I’d worried they’d sabotage everything I built as Park Chanyoung. Dodged a bullet there, but second worst still sucked. Starting from scratch in this body? Who knew how long it’d take.
“So what’s the plan? You’re shooting down everything I ask!”
“That’s why I have something to show you… We prepared this as a wish reward for the original Park Chanyoung. He refused it, though.”
“You prepared something?”
“Yes. Could you try saying ‘status window’?”
…Was this that? Felt like something out of a novel I’d read. Skeptical but curious, I muttered it aloud.
Name: Park Chanyoung
Job: -
Strength: 4 | Agility: 1 | Vitality: 2
Intelligence: 5 | Dexterity: 1 | Charm: -23
Traits: -
Karma: 0
“What the hell is this?”
“Simple! Use karma to change your appearance or boost physical abilities! Easy, right?”
“You can… change your appearance?”
“Yes! Height, weight, face—even eye color! It doesn’t happen instantly, so it doesn’t violate the wish. It’s pretty much the only way to get back what you lost—and more!”
My eyes lit up as I examined the status window closer. [Shop], [Skills], [Quests], [Appearance Edit]… And the one that jumped out most:
“‘Novel Entry’?”
“This system was custom-made for the original Park Chanyoung—to help him grow as a person.”
“…Yeah, that guy was definitely lacking in the humanity department.”
“Yes… His father in another dimension worried about him growing up alone without a guardian, so he asked us to help. To keep him from going astray…”
Park Chanyoung’s dad seemed like a deep thinker, unlike his son. ‘Like father, like son’—bullshit.
“To foster his personal growth while keeping him engaged, we developed this system!”
“Back in middle school, that bastard’s hobby was reading novels… This related?”
“Exactly! Many great novels get dropped mid-serialization. Wouldn’t it be fun for him to dive in and finish them himself?”
“…Yeah, that does sound intriguing.”
One of my hobbies was webnovels, so I got it. How many times had a promising series gotten axed and left me heartbroken?
“Enter a novel, finish it, then use [Appearance Edit] to grow taller or handsome-ify your face?”
“Spot on! Almost! You enter novels and get ‘quests’ based on the situation. Clear them to earn karma—the system’s currency!”
“Spend karma on the shop or editing your looks?”
“Yep! You catch on quick.”
I shrugged in response. Any fantasy fan would love this. But even angels couldn’t whip up a system like this easily… Why go to such lengths for one person?
No normal person gets ‘enter dropped novels’ powers. Not unless they’re in a freak situation like mine—or that bastard’s.
“Why bother with all this? Just extend his lifespan, give him some cash—done.”
“Haha… His dad’s a benefactor to the heavens. Even without a wish, we owe him favors. We checked on this world’s Park Chanyoung, and as you know…”
That ugly bastard’s vile words and actions flashed back.
“He wasn’t living well. With that personality, even riches or immortality wouldn’t make him happy.”
“Right. We poured our hearts into this, but he rejected it without a look…”
Yeah, yeah. You’re all saints. Real angels. If you’re so good, give me my body back. Fuck…
“Will you accept this system as compensation?”
“Hm…”
“Honestly, it’s way overkill for one person’s life. But compared to world-saving rewards… Anyway, we feel bad, and it’d go to waste otherwise.”
Hard to argue now. Stuck as Park Chanyoung, I needed something. Nothing better seemed likely.
“Fine. But it refundable? If something better comes up, switch it out.”
“Got it. Call anytime! But you’ll love it—I guarantee!”
“Hmph…”
“To open the status window, just say ‘status window’ out loud, like before!”
“…Why say it aloud like some cliché?”
“C’mon, that’s how it’s done!”
“…”
“Alright! Assuming you’re satisfied, I’ll send you where the original Park Chanyoung was!”
*
“Sniff sniff! What’s that smell?”
Screeech! I sat up in bed, and the frame groaned under a weight beyond its maker’s wildest dreams. The stench assaulting my nose was pure human funk—greasy hair, fermented sweat, armpit reek stabbing my sinuses…
“Damn… Shower first.”
I wandered the oversized bachelor pad—way too big for one person—and found the bathroom. Surprisingly clean inside. But despite my resolve to scrub every inch, I barely managed a face wash.
“How does someone live without shampoo…?”
I wasn’t even asking for conditioner. But no shampoo? All it had was a disposable razor and soap. Roaming the place revealed more annoyances I couldn’t anticipate. House layout? Front door passcode? Phone lock pattern? All mysteries.
As I fretted, Baby Angel popped up.
“Ah! Park Chanyoung!”
“Gah! You scared me!”
“We just synced life inconveniences, so no more issues!”
“What? I don’t even know the door code… Huh?”
Suddenly, the passcode floated into my mind. Phone number, bank PIN—everything for daily life.
“But no info on his relationships? What if I run into someone he knew?”
“Er… haha… We didn’t sync social connections…”
“…”
No friends at all? Shocking. Well… positive spin: fresh start. Even if he had friends, they wouldn’t mesh with me anyway.
“Okay! I’ll head out! Call if you need anything!”
She vanished in a puff like she’d appeared. I saw her off and gathered my thoughts.
What now? Dive into a novel with the system? Hit the gym to slim down? No.
“First, I crush that bastard—Park Chanyoung. No, Baek Hamin now.”
I recalled the vow etched deep as I became Park Chanyoung: ruin his life. Thoroughly smash it.
I’m tougher than you think, asshole. You didn’t know that. You started this.
I pulled out my phone, installed KakaoTalk, Facebook, Instagram. Logged into Baek Hamin’s accounts and started typing furiously. Time to post the kind of vile shit that’d make even old friends cut ties.
“Let’s see… Start with this? ‘I’m actually a pedo who only gets off on girls under 13… Post-pubescent? Not my type…’ ‘As loyal subjects of the Great Japanese Empire, we acknowledge Takeshima as Japanese territory… And comfort women were…’”
Then—poof. The post vanished, logged out mid-draft. Glitch? I hadn’t even hit send!
Logged back into Baek Hamin’s account… Log…
“Huh?”
What the—? I couldn’t remember the ID and password for accounts I’d used for years!
“Ughhh…”
“Ugh?! You startled me!”
Baby Angel appeared out of nowhere, looking utterly drained. Dark circles like she’d pulled all-nighters for days, though I’d seen her fine just five minutes ago.
“Ah… Rewinding to this point, but please don’t do that… I beg you…”
“Do what?”
“The SNS terrorism you’re trying. You went so thorough and vicious… Even heaven gave up fixing it and just rewound time…”
“What??”
Did she say… rewound time?
“Wiped your account memory and reset time, but then you did that horrific political purge in college… Ugh, scarier than I thought… This is the third time! Third!”
“…”
“We surrender! You’re dead set, and we can’t stop it anyway, so we give! How do you even memorize 300+ friends’ numbers?!”
“Uh… No clue right now. Can’t remember a thing…”
Even digging, only names and ages stuck. I’d memorized birthdays, addresses, hobbies, contacts—gone.
“You wrecked him so bad in the past—no, future! We can’t let Park Chanyoung’s life tank; it violates his dad’s ‘make my son thrive’ request! …We block one way, you find some insane new method to ruin Baek Hamin… Please, just stick to the system??”
Incredible. I’d planned to trash Baek Hamin’s life, but making an angel surrender? Three times?
“At least let him live a normal life, not misery… How do you destroy someone bare-handed like that…”
“…Baek Hamin’s life got ruined three times?”
“Yes!! So bad heaven had to rewind time with hands thrown up!”
She ranted on, grudge-deep. Amid her tirade, I caught the key point.
‘No matter how many times I try revenge, heaven blocks it…’
Not just interference—time rewinds. No countering that.
Give up revenge? ‘Bullshit.’
Three successes, but all undone. I hadn’t seen him suffer. Hadn’t avenged with my own hands. Rage wouldn’t fade otherwise.
But…
“Fine. I’ll play nice and drop it. But pay up.”
“Wh-what more?! We got nothing left!”
“Dig deeper; you’ll find something.”
“Devil! You’re a devil!”
“So? Yes or no?”
“Ugh… Hold on! This exceeds my authority! I’ll conference upstairs!”
I’d said I’d quit—for now. Rejecting outright gained nothing. They’d watch me closer, revenge farther away.
If I could hurl his life into the abyss, I’d bow and bide my time. I wasn’t the type to forget being struck first.