Antlion's Pit (18)
She smiled bitterly. "I laced the medicine you gave me yesterday."
"Hah, but why......"
My expression carried two meanings. First: why had she laced the medicine meant for me? Second: why had Sun Quan, who shared the same meal, shown no effects?
Sun Quan seemed to read my thoughts from my face and answered my unspoken questions without hesitation.
"I don't know where to begin......" She hesitated for a moment before continuing. "The truth is, I've taken that medicine from you before."
After saying that much, she noticed my blank expression and realized her explanation was incomplete, so she elaborated further.
"My body was in terrible pain recently.... They called it some kind of illness, but the physicians couldn't even identify the cause or prescribe anything. In the end, Mother brought in a respected sage from the Jiangnan region for a consultation, and the medicine he prescribed was exactly the same as this. I took it for about a month and recovered. When you appeared and offered it to me this time while I was suffering, it turned out to be the same medicine."
According to her, someone else had prescribed the same medicine to her before. Thinking about it, since the drug wasn't originally something I had created but rather something I had obtained from elsewhere, I should have considered the possibility that its maker had used it on someone before. Of course, who could have guessed it would be Sun Quan of all people, or that she would develop a tolerance? Still, it was a lapse on my part not to account for every possible contingency while carrying out such a major scheme.
"At first I didn't realize it was the same medicine, but after taking it and seeing the same effects appear, I knew. And after that, I couldn't bring myself to refuse it. I remembered how happy I had been while taking that medicine before. Even if it was just an escape from reality, and even if the dream grew shorter with each dose......"
Her expression turned sorrowful as she went on.
"...From the look on your face, you didn't know about the tolerance until just now. The more I kept taking it, the more tolerance I built up. The duration of the effects grew shorter, and the intensity weakened. To keep feeling the same high, I would have had to keep increasing the dose. But since I hadn't chosen to take it of my own will, I couldn't do that. So as time passed, I gradually woke from the dream... and to make up for what was missing, I started lying to myself. That way, even if I was deceiving myself, I could still be happy for that moment."
Now I understood why the drug hadn't worked on her. With considerable tolerance already built up, and having only consumed a portion of the shared dose, it was no surprise that the effects had nearly vanished by the final round. In my case, having never taken it before, even a small amount had been enough.... Wait a second. That meant....
I voiced my suspicion to confirm it.
"Then yesterday...?"
"You're asking if I wasn't actually under the influence? You're right. To some extent, I was. The effects were there, but the time I was truly intoxicated was extremely short. Everything else was just me pretending to be drugged, like I mentioned earlier."
With that, she untied the rope from her waist and bound my arms behind my back. As expected of someone accustomed to life on a ship, Sun Quan handled the rope with skill. Thanks to that, my body—already beginning to show signs of hallucination from the drug—ended up in a state that would be very difficult to escape from. I tested the bonds by moving slightly and, feeling the reality of my situation like a fish on a cutting board, asked her,
"I see.... So what will you do now?"
It was hard to focus. The hallucinations were gradually intensifying. Maintaining my sanity like this would only grow more difficult. I could also feel my senses dulling bit by bit. Before long, I would be completely defenseless. The situation had become quite dire, but there was no time to complain. If I wanted to break out of this, I had to strike while I still had strength and reason left. To do that, I needed to lure her within reach somehow, so I tried to provoke her victor's vanity and draw her into range—but Sun Quan betrayed my expectations with an entirely different reaction.
"...The effects don't last long. From my experience, the drug should wear off in about an hour, and once it does, the hallucinations will fade and you'll be able to untie the rope with your hands. You're resourceful, so something like this shouldn't be too hard for you."
".......?"
Sun Quan was saying things completely different from what I had anticipated. And the expression on her face as she spoke wasn't one of triumph or anger, but rather something oddly refreshed.
"I wanted to live up to your expectations, but it seems it was too much for me after all."
Her face looked slightly forlorn as she said that, but she soon brightened again and continued.
"But at the very least, I wanted to do what I could."
She pointed toward the southern horizon with her finger.
"Once you free yourself, run straight in that direction. There should be a ship waiting. Show this token to the sailors and tell them what happened. They'll take you back."
With that, she held out her personal token. It was part of a crudely carved wooden doll, and she slipped it into my robes. Thinking back, this had been my only chance to turn the tables on her, but because I had been thrown into confusion by her words, I let the opportunity slip away.
"My sister will need your talents too. If possible, I hope you'll serve her loyally as well. And...."
While I was still reeling in confusion, Sun Quan stepped back, hesitated as if debating whether to speak, then approached me once more and whispered softly into my ear.
"Thank you for indulging me."
After saying that, she left. The direction she walked was north—completely opposite from where the ships were, and also the direction where Ye Gwan's soldiers were swarming. That meant her destination, and the fate awaiting her afterward, was all too clear.
"You're telling me."
The fact that the sage had once given Sun Quan the same medicine had twisted things in an unexpected way. The original plan had certainly gone awry because the drug hadn't worked properly, but at least Sun Quan hadn't grasped our true intentions and had instead interpreted the medicine as being given for treatment, twisting it into an act of goodwill. That was fortunate, at least. Even though she had been aware that we had engaged in sexual relations, she hadn't said anything about it, and moreover, she had initiated it herself without the drug's influence at the end. Did that mean she didn't know that the drug put her in a hallucinatory state where she would naturally accept external stimuli...? Perhaps the sage, for whatever reason, had never told her about that side effect. From the way she spoke, it seemed she believed she had entered the relationship of her own will and decision, so that guess felt quite plausible.
Still, the fact that things had ended this way wasn't bad in itself. The drug hadn't worked as expected, but as a result, Sun Quan hadn't sought revenge—instead, she had interpreted everything favorably.
"But this isn't the ending I wanted."
If things continued like this, Sun Quan would almost certainly be captured, and given her personality, she would likely commit suicide to avoid bringing shame upon her sister, Sun Ce. In a way, that would still count as twisting fate, but the problem was that it would be Sun Quan herself who decided her own fate. To reap the fruit of twisting fate, I had to be the one to take the lead in reshaping her destiny—not leave it to anyone else.
Struggling to correct my vision as it melted into increasingly grotesque colors and shapes, I forced my collapsing body upright.
"Now's not the time to worry about that."
I gritted my teeth and slammed my head against a nearby tree. My forehead split open and blood poured out, the sharp pain jolting my consciousness back for a moment. Seizing that instant, I activated Muscle Reinforcement and tore the ropes apart. But the hallucinations and fatigue came crashing back even harder, making it impossible to exert any more power. Fighting against those trials, I spoke to Ser.
"Tell me what to do."