Breasts Aren't Bad!
Chapter 40 - Breasts Aren't Bad!
I got beaten senseless by Cheonma until training time was over. And it was a very productive session. The spectators had vanished at some point. In contrast, the dueling arena's systems had started running again. I couldn't even remember how many times we'd repeated the cycle. After passing fifty, the number stopped meaning much anyway.
In the end, throughout the entire day, I only managed to land two clean hits. One at the very beginning of our fight, and another in the middle. For the first one, you'll have to refer to the previous chapter. The second hit was pure coincidence. I'd accidentally yanked out a chunk of Cheonma's hair. You might wonder why that counted as a valid strike, but it absolutely did. It was an attack that struck both his mind and body at once. The only downside was that Cheonma lost his mind for a while afterward and stomped my corpse into the ground.
Fortunately, once the dueling arena systems shut down and Cheonma's hair returned to normal, he finally regained his senses and stopped the merciless violence.
"Pulling someone's hair and beating them up like that is a bit much, don't you think?"
"...To this lord, hair is as precious as life itself. Losing one's hair is no different from losing the title of Cheonma."
Even Cheonma seemed terrified of hair loss. But what exactly was the Heavenly Demon Divine Art? Every punch, every breath, every step—it was all part of the Heavenly Demon Divine Art. Maybe hair loss itself could be considered one of its techniques.
"Heavenly Demon Hair Loss (魔羅脫毛)."
"One more round."
"Fuck, seriously."
From the sensation, it was clear this wasn't like what happened with Lucian or Uncle Kang Hyuk. He'd definitely had hair implants. In the end, even Cheonma couldn't overcome the baldness genes running in his family.
[So this is a hunter's living point.]
'When dealing with Cheonma, just pull his hair.'
I, the man who's now caused hair loss in three people, can personally guarantee it.
Then a sudden question popped into my head. The way Cheonma had been calling out Ryu Kanghyuk's name with such resentment.
"By the way, who exactly is that Ryu Kanghyuk guy? Why do you hate him so much?"
"That bastard is, much as I hate to admit it, a man stronger than this lord."
"So your inferiority complex just exploded?"
"Shut up!!!! It's not something that petty!!!!"
"Then why do you hate him?"
Cheonma clenched his fists so hard they trembled.
"That bastard recommended something called 'coins' to this lord. He made me use up all my savings, saying it was a way to make money by betting money."
"What?"
"He said it was 'money in, money out,' and made this lord spend every last coin I'd saved."
"No way. Don't tell me you actually used it all?"
"...I survived on nothing but grass roots for a while. They were surprisingly tasty."
"Jesus fucking Christ."
Cheonma closed his eyes and muttered, "Pine needles were delicious too." Yet he claimed that even after going through that period, he was fine with it.
"Since I was the one who bought into it, I can be angry about that. But I don't hate Ryu Kanghyuk for it."
I didn't quite understand. If he didn't hate him for that, then why show so much hostility?
"Then why did you react like that earlier?"
"I asked Ryu Kanghyuk if he bought in too, and how much he'd lost."
"And then?"
At that moment, Cheonma ground his teeth with a sickening crunch. His eyes overflowed with rage that had exceeded all limits.
"That bastard said, 'Of course I didn't buy any. I'm not an idiot.'"
"......"
Maybe Uncle Kang Hyuk hadn't retired because hunter society was too dirty. Maybe hunter society had forced him into retirement because they couldn't handle him.
"Anyway, if you ever see that bastard Ryu Kanghyuk, tell him this. Let's meet again tomorrow."
"No, I still can't use body reinforcement. You saw my arms and legs get blown off earlier, right?"
[They flew off together like a hamburger combo set.]
'For just 1,000 won more, your head goes flying too, apparently.'
Cheonma crossed his arms and met my gaze with complete confidence.
"This is how one learns through real combat."
"You're just trying to beat me up as a substitute because your fighting style is similar to Ryu Kanghyuk's, right?"
"......."
"......."
Sudden silence. Cheonma suddenly averted his eyes.
"......."
"Hey, answer me."
"I'm leaving."
Without answering, Cheonma scurried away with surprising speed for his size. Left alone in the dueling arena, I watched his retreating back as it quickly shrank into a dot.
[Is that the Heavenly Demon Escape Technique?]
'Cheonma, you son of a bitch.'
Then, in the distance, I spotted Hye-ji training. She was facing off against a spider-like monster, holding a single military knife in a reverse grip. Her attacks were different from usual. She wasn't just overpowering it with brute strength through that crude weapon. Her movements were clean, precise, and disciplined. It was like watching special forces operatives I'd seen on TV as a kid.
She calmly dodged the spider's attacks and sliced off one leg at a time with each of her turns. Yet her speed never slowed, and before long she finished by slitting its throat.
The moment training ended, Hye-ji noticed my gaze and came running over.
"Shinwoo, when did you finish?"
"Just now. By the way, I've never seen you use a knife before. Where'd you learn that?"
"Huh? Oh... this. I just... learned it casually at home."
"Really? Got it."
Hye-ji answered somewhat evasively. She clearly didn't want to talk about it, so I let it go.
Just then, Jung Ayeon walked over to us.
"Hey, Jung Ayeon. Want to train with Cheonma tomorrow too?"
"......This lady is fine. I still lack training."
Just this morning she'd been speaking enviously about it, but now she was refusing. She was probably just too embarrassed.
"Don't worry. You said it was so enviable. We should share opportunities like this. I'll talk to him for you."
"No! It's fine! I cannot burden Lord Shinwoo! So please, just stop!"
"Still, if I ask, he'll listen. Starting tomorrow, you're joining us, got it?"
"Stop spouting nonsense! I'd rather die than go through that hamster wheel torture! Just kill me right here!"
Finally, Jung Ayeon snapped and started screaming at the top of her lungs. An awkward silence fell between us.
"......"
"......"
"Fuck, no wonder all the spectators disappeared."
"It was quite different from what I expected."
"I thought it'd be like other novels where they'd train you properly from the basics."
This clearly wasn't a protagonist growth story.
[At least it's not a misery porn story, so that's something.]
'Fuck.'
***
As mentioned before, the World Tree Reception Representative candidate selection was done through a single-candidate vote. Because of that, I'd assumed there wouldn't be any separate campaign activities. But reality was different from my expectations.
The designated area in front of the classroom building was for election promotion. A large number of people had gathered there to campaign. Normally, candidates would go around to classrooms directly, but apparently that had been banned after complaints about excessive noise, so now all promotion was restricted to the designated area.
And even though there was only one candidate, the campaign was extremely heated. Mostly from the opposing side.
"A half-breed as the World Tree Reception Representative? Absolutely ridiculous!!!!!"
"Pink hair?! Don't they know pink means cheap?!"
"Only purebloods should meet the World Tree!!"
"Advertising with inappropriate breasts is a capital offense!!!!!!"
The last line was so forced that I turned to look. It was none other than Hye-ji shouting passionately. I considered pointing it out but decided to just pretend I hadn't seen anything and walked past.
When I arrived at the classroom, Jung Ayeon spotted me and waved.
"Jung Ayeon, you saw what's going on outside, right?"
"Indeed, my lord. It's more active than I expected."
Jung Ayeon looked slightly amazed. I shared my thoughts on the intense opposition movement with her.
"I thought there wouldn't be any discrimination since she's a high elf. But they're being ridiculously blatant about it."
".....Even this lady can be wrong."
Just then, Hye-ji entered the classroom.
"Another productive day."
"Hye-ji, you're really going all out with the campaign."
"......Did you hear the slogans too?"
Hye-ji's face turned pale. I couldn't bring myself to answer and just stayed silent.
"......"
"Fuck."
That alone was answer enough.
Jung Ayeon tried to comfort Hye-ji in her own way.
"My lady, you shouldn't obsess over such things."
"You're one to talk, you flat-chested bastard."
"...My apologies."
Of course, it didn't really help. Just like Hye-ji said, Jung Ayeon's chest was quite large compared to the average person. It just didn't show because she always wore that martial arts uniform.
I could roughly understand why Hye-ji had gone berserk. The elf on the poster had an abnormally large chest, so it probably stemmed from an inferiority complex about what she lacked.
"Shinwoo, so you're still going to vote for that elf bastard?"
"Probably."
Suddenly, Hye-ji spoke sharply and reached out.
"Are you also bewitched by breasts?"
"......That's.... not it..... just let me breathe...... can you let go?"
She'd grabbed me by the neck in an instant. After being choked and finally freed, I could barely catch my breath.
"Anyway, I already tore up candidate number one's poster, and all those bastards doing the opposition campaign are his supporters anyway."
"...Right."
"So I'm voting for him just to make sure he suffers until the end."
"Sorry. I was so blinded by breasts that I missed the real enemy."
"It's fine. Take a deep breath and repeat after me. There are no bad breasts in this world."
"Th....there..."
Hye-ji desperately tried to repeat my words. She still looked like she was struggling, but she'd be able to say it soon.
"Good, you're doing well. Try again with more strength. There are no bad breasts in this world."
"Th....there....."
"Good, say it!"
Finally, as if she'd steeled herself, Hye-ji shouted loudly.
"All bastards with bigger breasts than me must die!"
".......Hye-ji, even Thanos only killed half of humanity."
[We're all going to die.]
'Is this the beginning of the Hye-ji-only-survives apocalypse?'
At that moment, Jung Ayeon looked at me and shouted urgently.
Of course.
"My lord!! Run away!! Quickly!!"
"I've already caught him."
"......Damn."
Hye-ji was just a bit faster.
As expected, Cheonma arrived right on time for today's practical training session. But we couldn't actually train that day. And for good reason.
The crazed Hye-ji had mercilessly slaughtered me with countless lethal weapons. The saying that fists are closer than the law still applied here. Treaties and opposition statements meant nothing in this situation. Hye-ji's weapons were much closer than those scraps of paper with their words.
Overwhelmed by the sight, Cheonma quickly moonwalked away and quietly slipped out.
Meanwhile, Hye-ji, who had used every single bullet without wasting one, let out a voice mixed with lament.
"No more boobs..."
***
Cheonma came every single day for two weeks. Except for the day Hye-ji tore me to pieces, he spent every visit beating me one-sidedly. Actually, "beating" didn't quite capture it. "Exploding my body" was more accurate.
Still, by the final day, I finally showed some progress. I'd finally adapted to body reinforcement.
- Bang!!!!!!
I still hadn't adapted. This time, my right wrist went flying. Number 354. The meaning was simple. The total number of times my limbs had been blown off while attempting body reinforcement so far.
- Bang!!!!!!!
355 times.
There was no problem when I was just concentrating in place. The issue was that mistakes kept happening during actual combat. I still needed improvement.
Anyway, on the final day, I finally managed to crack Cheonma's head. Of course, it wasn't through fair means. I used every dirty trick and deception without hesitation. Plus, Cheonma wasn't using his full strength either. On top of that, the propulsion from both my legs exploding at once let me exploit a momentary opening.
It was cowardly and completely unlike a protagonist, relying on layers of coincidence. But I succeeded.
"Fuuuuuuuuck, I finally got youuuuuuu!!!"
"Ahem. This lord went easy on you. Let's go again."
"Yeah, you're trash. I'm not doing this anymore. Why the hell would I do it again?"
"We've already started."
"Fuck."
And so, until Cheonma's final day at the academy, I got thoroughly beaten to a pulp.