Round of 16 Aftermath
The opponent forfeited before the match even started. It was so absurdly anticlimactic that I almost felt bad. Maybe it was because they’d slapped the word “Madness” right into their team name, but it was genuinely an insane decision. I’d been low-key worried that if we actually fought, I wouldn’t be able to handle their brand of crazy. So honestly? This was a relief.
I’ve told you a million times already. I’m perfectly normal.
Still, it wasn’t a complete waste. I’d reached a profound enlightenment regarding one of the Three Great Mysteries: the Boundary Line Bestiality Theory. I was certain this revelation would prove incredibly helpful to the countless people who would one day fall in love with beastmen. It would be as groundbreaking as the Harkness Test.
“Just please go die already, nya!!”
Crack!
“Heh heh. No can do.”
A razor-sharp tree branch came flying in from nowhere, clearly aiming to skewer my skull. Of course, it simply shattered the moment it struck my head. Unfortunately, I still hadn’t found answers to the other two great mysteries.
I turned to Caersi with a troubled expression.
“So what happens if you have sex with your gender-bent self? If Lilia gets pregnant, whose belly actually swells up?”
“Just pick whichever hole your dick likes best, nya!!!!”
Whichever my dick likes? Oh!
“I got it! We’ll just declare the one that gets us harder as the official canon!!!”
“Even if that’s what you really think, what the hell kind of logic is that, nya!!!!!!!!!”
“...Young Master. If you see me outside, pretend you do not know me.”
Jung Ayeon and Caersi both spat at my feet. Even that wasn’t enough to vent their anger; they stormed out of the dueling arena, still fuming.
Meanwhile, Hye-ji and Elsia had already placed their bets, which meant they were stuck watching every single match. Compared to Hye-ji’s usual destructive rampages, these fights looked like children’s talent shows. Since there was still plenty of time before the quarterfinals, I’d planned to leave the two sleeping beauties alone and head out. But—
Bang!
A bullet created by Hye-ji embedded itself right between my feet.
The supposedly sleeping Hye-ji suddenly lifted her head, eyes blazing, and stared straight at me.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“Uh… the bathroom?”
The instant the words left my mouth, Elsia’s blue butterflies and white thorn vines began wrapping around my entire body.
“Husband! You’re not trying to run away by yourself, are you?”
“...No.”
How the hell did these bitches know?
At least add some spaces, for fuck’s sake.
My precious youth membrane was on the line here.
The spot where Hye-ji and Elsia were sprawled out was the bench reserved exclusively for tournament staff. Essentially the VVVIP seats with the best view of every upcoming match. My own round was already over, though, and the next team would need the space soon. Other teams’ staff might show up, and students were technically supposed to watch from the spectator stands.
But.
“What are you looking at, you fuckers?”
“N-nothing! Please, sit down!”
The moment Hye-ji lazily raised her head and opened negotiations, we were instantly granted front-row seats. As soon as the deal was done, Hye-ji flopped back over like she’d completed her mission and immediately fell asleep again. Thanks to her, I got to watch the rest of the matches with Hye-ji and Elsia on either side of me.
Remember this well. The rules are far away, but Hye-ji’s gun is always close.
Instead of trying to escape, I bought some fried chicken and sat down between the two girls to watch the remaining matches. The moment the smell hit her, Elsia’s eyes snapped open. She slowly sat up, pretended to fall back asleep, and reached sneakily toward the chicken box.
I shut that down immediately.
“If you want some, just go buy your own.”
“But there’s warm chicken right here!”
“Cut the crap. I haven’t even eaten yet.”
This time, however, Elsia was too hungry to back down. She even used her abilities. White thorn vines coiled around my body while sky-blue butterflies tried to snatch the drumsticks. I bit through the vines and crushed the butterflies in my fist.
“Stop it, you crazy bitch. Why the hell are you going for the drumsticks?”
“Everyone knows the legs taste the best!”
“I know that! That’s why I’m asking why the fuck you’re targeting mine!”
Right then, a loud growl came from Elsia’s stomach. I sighed and handed her the entire box.
“Let’s just share.”
“Thank you, husband!”
“...Don’t start with the drumstick, damn it.”
By the time we finished arguing, another match had already ended. The winning team consisted of two male martial artists, but I’d barely watched any of it. Since they were our next opponents, it was an especially painful mistake.
Ha… I should’ve just given her the whole box from the start.
I lightly bonked Elsia on the head as she gnawed on a drumstick.
“Kyaaht! But it’s so delicious!”
“I missed the match because of you! Give me back my drumstick!”
“It’s already in my stomach!!!”
“Want another smack, you little shit?”
I bonked her again. Even while getting hit, Elsia kept inhaling chicken like a machine. Her eyes were slightly unfocused; she seemed to be running on pure instinct.
Tsk. I should’ve just given it to her earlier. Now I feel bad.
The tension finally drained away, and drowsiness hit me like a truck. The moment I yawned, Elsia forcibly pulled me down and offered her lap as a pillow.
“You’re tired, right? Get some rest.”
“...Leave me some chicken.”
“Oh my! You really are exhausted! You should sleep right away!”
“Crazy woman.”
Elsia half-forcibly covered my eyes. The sudden darkness made me drift off almost immediately. Just before I fell asleep, I thought I heard her whisper something.
“Sleep well, husband. I’m always thankful. My love.”
I couldn’t quite make it out.
When I opened my eyes again, every match was already over. My chicken box had vanished too.
Sigh. Of course.
I sat up from Elsia’s lap pillow and looked around. The chicken box was sitting on her left side.
“You actually saved some?”
“Of course!”
Elsia simply beamed at me with an angelic smile. We woke up the still-sleeping Hye-ji and the three of us tore into the chicken together. Even though I’d expected it to be cold, the meat was strangely piping hot, as if it had just been bought. There was still a huge pile left.
The next day had nothing particularly noteworthy. If I had to pick something, the CATS team’s match was decent. Their leader, the paladin, showed none of the ugly behavior from before and put on a genuinely impressive performance. Caersi didn’t do anything except tell him, “Win and come back, nya.” Even so, the paladin faithfully fulfilled his role. He took on both opponents alone, using his spear and shield in perfect harmony for both offense and defense.
Tsk, that shield looks tough.
If that were possible, I would’ve done it already.
The paladin especially stood out when he used his shield as a focal point to create a massive white barrier. It easily blocked every attack aimed at him and Caersi. It became a pure battle of mana attrition. The opponents tried to break through. The paladin focused entirely on defense. In the end, the paladin won once the enemy ran out of mana. He exploited the gap in their weakening assault to pick them off one by one, sealing the victory.
The CATS team was currently doing some kind of victory ceremony that also doubled as missionary work.
Why aren’t the professor bastards calling them out on it? I’m doing it too.
See you in the finals, you bastards. My gut told me the CATS team would cruise all the way there without much trouble.
My Defensive Coat had finished charging and could be used immediately, but once its effect was expended it would need at least a week to recharge. The tournament, however, ran back-to-back with no rest days. Round of 16 today, quarterfinals tomorrow, then the finals. Since I was aiming for the championship, I planned to fight the round of 16 and quarterfinals with my bare body.
I have no idea what kind of insane monsters will make it to the finals, after all.
I checked the updated bracket on the academy app. Our next opponents were the team Big Bro Namgung and Little Bro from the Volcanic Sect, made up of two martial artists.
As I left the arena, Jung Ayeon was waiting for me.
“Young Master, did you happen to watch our next opponents’ match?”
“No, I somehow missed it.”
“...It probably had something to do with Miss Elsia, I presume.”
“Spot on.”
Jung Ayeon let out a small sigh before speaking.
“Your next opponents are said to display tremendous skill through an extraordinary level of ‘bond’ among martial artists, I say.”
“Bond?”
“Indeed.”
Her voice sounded slightly reluctant.
“You must be careful. Especially if you are a man.”
“Huh?”
“...Never mind. It was a slip of the tongue.”
For some reason, Jung Ayeon’s words felt strangely ominous today.
Ah, fuck. You’re making me anxious, so shut up.
I swallowed the rising unease and returned to the dormitory even though it was still early. I needed to manage my condition for tomorrow’s match. I had no particular plan, but I figured I’d just smash through everyone like I had so far. With that thought, I fell asleep a little earlier than usual.