The Black Knight Swore to the Blind Saintess
And it was real.
Astonishingly enough, the Anthology of New Sex Toy Reviews was being legally published in the Empire at this very moment.
In sex toy shops all across the Empire, an owner and an employee — or an employee and an owner, as the case might be — would pair up, one man and one woman, to review products together.
Take a dildo review, for instance: the female employee would write up her firsthand experience actually using the toy, while the owner would either watch, or work the dildo himself, and then write up his review of her reactions.
The descriptions in these reviews were so unflinchingly explicit that the thing sold like hotcakes across the Empire, practically an erotic anthology in its own right.
Much like the Michelin Guide, apparently there were plenty of devoted fans who would travel from far away just to buy a product based on these reviews alone.
We closed the shop earlier than usual.
Heh heh heh. Close early without permission like this, and the customers and revenue will both suffer, won't they?
Cherishing that fond hope, I stepped into the break room.
Eve stood there frozen, a vibrator clutched in her hand.
[Hiiiing. What do I do? I've never done anything like this, you perverted boss.]
I scrubbed my hands at the sink in the corner of the break room with the gravity of a surgeon about to operate.
Eve, who had been hesitating, finally opened her mouth.
"Um. Boss?"
"Yeah?"
"I was thinking... maybe it'd be fine to just do it like this, without taking off the uniform."
I toweled off my hands and nodded.
"Sure. Whatever's comfortable for you."
[Yes. Semicircumvented.
But what am I going to do next time? What if they make me review a dildo or something? Aaah. Whatever. Just get through today first.]
I jerked my chin toward the sofa.
"Shall we do it here?"
"Yes."
She leaned back against the armrest of the sofa, then swung her legs up into an M-shape on the cushions.
A skin-tight blue high-leg leotard. The split between her legs was glimpsed and hidden and glimpsed again.
[No reason to be embarrassed, Eve.
Better than being dragged off to die, right?
You need to look professional right now.
You read the instructions thoroughly.
Just act natural, like you've done this a hundred times!]
I sat down beside Eve.
"Shall we give it a try?"
"Yes. I'll begin."
Eve switched on the vibrator.
Bzzzzzzz—
She brought the vibrating head up to her clit.
Her expression stayed fairly composed.
[Mmm. Okay. Not bad. Do a little of this, then say it seems fine — isn't that all it takes?
No. Better to point out shortcomings, things that left something to be desired. That'll make me sound more experienced.
The sensitivity lacks refinement — yes. Saying it like that should sound pretty convincing, shouldn't it?]
"Hmm."
I gazed quietly at the junction between her legs.
[Gazing Molestation]
"Eughh!"
Eve, who had been sitting still, jerked at the waist.
[Wh-what? What was that? I definitely set it to the lowest vibration?]
I nodded.
"So it's starting to feel good, huh?"
"...Y-yes."
[This perverted boss. I told him not to stare like that... nngh.]
Somewhere along the way, the crotch of her uniform had gone damp.
"The vibration's too low. Should we turn it up a bit?"
"Yes. Haaah. Haa."
Eve adjusted the device.
Bzzzzzzzz—
The vibrator pulsed harder against her clit.
[Gazing Molestation]
[Gazing Molestation]
"Nngh!"
She clamped her mouth shut, stifling a moan.
But there was no hiding her body's reaction. Eve's hips twitched and shuddered again and again as clear fluid began trickling out from the crotch of her high-leg leotard.
Wow. Look at her gush.
The already soaked uniform clung to her body in a tight sheath, the shape of her pussy showing plainly through the fabric beneath.
"So? Think you can write up a rough review now?"
"Huh? ...Yes."
She nodded.
[Is it over? Good. It was embarrassing, but less than I—]
"Now then. Time for the partner review."
"Huh?"
Before Eve even had time to be surprised, I snatched the vibrator from her hand.
Slipping my arm behind her back, I wrapped it tight around her slender waist, then began rubbing the buzzing vibrator all over her clit and the mound of her pussy.
Bzzzzzzzzzz—
"Nngh. B-Bossss. Aahng."
Eve looked thoroughly flustered, but there was nothing she could do about it.
"There we go. There we go."
[Gazing Molestation] × 10
"Nngh. Nnn-aahng."
[What do I do? It feels good♥]
Judging it had become dangerous to continue, Eve grabbed my arm and hastily forced the vibrator away.
But it was already too late.
"Nnngh! Ahaang."
Her hips bucking and quivering, Eve began squirting her clear juices in a long, trailing mess beneath the thin fabric.
I switched off the vibrator.
"Nnn. Aaaahng."
She nuzzled and squirmed against my chest like a cat begging to be petted.
"Mm. Being a new product and all, it really is nice. What did you think, Eve?"
She answered between ragged breaths.
"Haahng. The sensitivity... the sensitivity is..."
"Yes?"
"Not bad. Heeh. Hah."
Her hips still twitching at intervals, Eve couldn't manage to get up off the sofa for quite a long while.
Ever since Princess Evangeline had come to our shop, I'd taken to going out for a walk every evening around dusk to the plaza in front of the Grand Cathedral.
"Saintess, please bless my child with a touch."
"Saintess, please look over here, just once."
"Step back! You'll hurt the Saintess!"
Emilia was making her way into the cathedral under the escort of the holy knights attached to the Grand Cathedral.
Rose. So you became the Saintess.
It had been that way in the novel too, and there had been political reasons behind her elevation as well.
I had no idea exactly what miracle they'd pinned on her for it.
But she'd certainly been worthy of the title.
I glanced around.
The reason I'd been coming to the plaza at this hour for the past several days.
Now that Emilia had finally appeared in the plaza, the odds were good that he was here somewhere too.
Except I'd only ever seen the protagonist on the page. Never his actual face.
Huh? Could that be him?
A man on the far side of the plaza caught my eye, staring fixedly at the Saintess.
A red-haired young man of sickly, fragile beauty, clutching his starving belly.
Sieg, the protagonist of this novel, had crossed over from the Demon Realm into the human world only recently.
The day he first laid eyes on the Saintess in the plaza, he could bear his hunger no longer and went to the cathedral to beg for food — and that was how he first met Emilia.
So the story has flowed along the same path up to this point.
Emilia was no longer the blind Saintess, so even left alone, things were bound to diverge from the novel.
Still, just in case, I had to take precautions.
I approached the red-haired man.
"Hey. Are you alright?"
"Huh?"
"What's your name?"
"..."
A wary expression. I offered my own name first.
"I'm called Ian Castolini. I run a small, ahem... a small toy shop down there. And your name would be?"
"...Sieg."
"Sieg. Good name.
Have you been starving yourself for days, though? You look terrible."
"..."
"Here. Take this money and go get yourself something to eat at that restaurant over there."
I fished enough coin out of my pocket to live on for a week and pressed it into his hand.
"Huh? Why would you give me—"
He asked, still wearing a guarded face.
"You just seemed to be having a rough time of it.
Those calluses — you've held a sword, haven't you? Fill your belly, then try the adventurers' guild over there. They might have work for you."
In the original story, Sieg went to the imperial sword academy on Emilia's recommendation.
But starting out through the adventurers' guild wouldn't be a bad path either.
Leaving him staring at me in a daze, I turned and walked away.
From behind me, he called out again and again.
"Thank you! Thank you so much!"
Late that night.
Dressed in a white nightgown, Emilia Rosebloom stood in the cathedral garden, gazing blankly up at the moon.
—Rose. I love you.
—I love you too, Ian.
The conversations they had exchanged night after night on that white-sand beach, watching the moon together.
Those days when they had nothing at all — and had been happy.
Ian.
Just that afternoon, she had glimpsed what she thought was his phantom in the plaza.
When she'd turned her head back in disbelief, he was gone.
It must have been her imagination after all.
"Saintess."
A young servant girl approached.
"Patricia. What is it?"
"There is a gentleman who says he desperately wishes to make his confession to you, Saintess.
He says he will make a donation to the cathedral as well, and begs this one time only..."
"At this hour?"
"Shall I turn him away?"
A donation.
A donation.
—My name is Ian Castolini.
I run a small toy shop in the capital.
—Pleased to meet you, Mr. Castolini.
My name is Emilia Rosebloom.
You have business with me?
You wish to make a donation to the cathedral here in the capital? Is that true?
The first conversation she had ever shared with him came flooding back.
"No. I'll hear his confession.
I'll change and come."
"Very well, Saintess."
Patricia withdrew.
A short while later, when Emilia arrived at the confessional, Patricia was waiting outside and gave a small bow of her head.
"Saintess. He is waiting inside."
"I understand. Patricia, it's late — go inside and get some sleep."
"Yes, Saintess."
Emilia stepped into the confessional.
Through the gap in the small wooden lattice, she caught a fleeting glimpse of a man's hand in the chamber across from her.
As Emilia took her seat, the man traced the sign of the Goddess and spoke.
"Blessed be you, under the glory of the Goddess."
Saintess Emilia Rosebloom answered in a trembling voice.
"Confess... confess your sins."
"..."
The man across the lattice said nothing more.
Rose could already tell who he was from his hand and voice alone.
But she needed time to accept reality — and just a little more certainty.
After a moment, his voice came from the other side.
"I have sinned.
I promised the woman I love that I would be with her, and then I left her all alone."
The Saintess's eyes were already rimmed with red.
Rose fought back her tears with all her strength.
"Nngh."
In the end, a single tear slipped down her cheek.
Sniffling, Rose asked,
"...Is there more? Is there another sin?"
"I promised my beloved that I would come find her, without fail.
But it took far longer than I ever imagined."
"Nngh. Sob."
"Saintess. What must I do to earn her forgiveness for this sin?"
At the man's question, Rose wiped her tears and answered.
"Go to her... and tell her that you love her. And then... kiss her."
The man on the other side gave no answer.
A moment later.
Knock knock.
Someone rapped on the door of the confessional where Rose sat.
She rose slowly from her seat.
Trembling fingers drew the door gently open.
Creeeak—
The moment the door swung wide, Ian stepped in and pulled her hard into his arms.
"Rose. I love—"
"I know. Hurry."
Without either of them bothering to decide who went first, the two of them poured kisses upon each other.