Chapter 44
Chapter 44
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 44
Chapter Title: [Secret Clinic] Yi Gil-dong the Taoist Returns (3)
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One of the two weapons I'd brought with me when I came to this world.
The number one contributor that let a total scrub like me in Abyss Miner beat the crap out of Viper.
Bear repellent spray, at your service.
"Hey, Kim Naegwan."
"Ugh... P-please... mercy..."
Kim Naegwan looked up at me, his face a mess of tears and snot.
"We're not done yet. To wash away your filthy sins, we need a ritual."
"A ritual...?"
"That's right. A ritual to burn away your sins with sacred flames."
"Eek! F-Fire?! Sp-Spare me!"
"Don't worry! You won't die. Flame Haze! Breath of Fire Technique!"
I just made up spell names on the spot.
Not like he'd know the difference anyway.
Tsssssssss—!!
I unloaded the spray mercilessly right into Kim Naegwan's face.
A red mist engulfed the eunuch's face without mercy.
"Gaaahhh!!"
The effect was immediate.
Capsaicin extract invading his eyes, nose, and mouth—how could it not be?
Stuff that drives bears running is basically a chemical weapon on humans.
"Aaaagh! My eyes! My eyes! They're burning! My face is on fire!"
Kim Naegwan clawed at his face like a madman, rolling on the floor, coughing up a storm, snot streaming everywhere.
His writhing agony was actually pretty entertaining.
"Your sins are far from cleansed! Breath of Fire! Ninth Form! Rengoku!"
Tsssssssss!
"Gaaaaahhh!!"
I gave him one final hefty dose, then quickly stowed the spray in my inventory.
And pulled out the three-section staff again.
Best to smack him one more time while he's out of it—that's how it sticks.
"I'll spread the sacred fire energy throughout your body!"
Thwack! Pow!
"Agh! Gah! Please!"
The beating resumed.
Hell itself couldn't be worse.
"Kim! Do you now recognize your own sins?!"
"Cough! Cough! Yes! I do! Taoist Master! I'm sorry! I've committed a mortal sin!"
I had no idea what sin he thought it was, but at least he was begging.
"Do you really? I sense no sincerity at all!"
Crack! Snap! Thud!
"Gaaah! Yes! Aaaagh! Please! Stop! Heuk! I'm sorry! Please forgive me!"
After a good, spirited thrashing, Kim Naegwan was sobbing, rubbing his hands together like a fly.
I'd done it to him, but damn if he didn't look a little pitiful now.
...Maybe that's enough?
Honestly, I got a bit carried away in the excitement and hit him harder than planned.
Any more, and he might actually die.
"Good. You finally seem repentant. Recognizing your sins is enough."
I poked his shoulder with the staff and lowered my voice.
"Listen well. You have only one path to survival."
"Y-Yes! I'll keep it in mind! Anything!"
"Recently, someone must have done you a favor! At first light tomorrow, go to them and express your heartfelt gratitude! If you play any tricks or harbor ill thoughts... then I'll incinerate your body to ash with the Eternal Flames of Heaven and Earth! Got it?"
"Yes! Yes! Understood! I'll go right away! I'll kowtow to Heo the Physician!"
He got the message.
I hadn't named Heo the Physician, but his guilty feet had led him there.
"And don't breathe a word of tonight. I'll be watching you with my sorcery."
"I'll keep it in mind!"
"Good."
Shwick!
I performed the flourish of collapsing and extending the staff.
"You must. Or my Ruyi Jingu Bang will turn your body to mush."
"Eek! Eeeeek...!"
Kim Naegwan nodded frantically.
This should drill the lesson home.
I shot a glance at the thief Cheonbong.
Let's go.
I slipped out of the room quick as a flash.
Once outside, over the wall, and in a safe spot, Cheonbong gave me a thumbs-up.
"Whoa, you really are a Taoist master! Look at that eunuch—he'll never forget this for the rest of his life!"
"No big deal."
"Flame Haze... Breath of Fire? Incredible! I swear I thought fire was shooting from your hands!"
"Ahem. It's a secret technique of our sect, not something to show lightly."
Sorcery really is the perfect excuse.
Soon, we linked up with Jang Taesu waiting in the alley shadows.
"Master! You're safe?"
"Yeah. No issues?"
"Yes. Patrol passed once, but we weren't spotted."
Jang Taesu and Cheonbong exchanged glances.
Cheonbong would spill the tale later, no doubt.
My reputation would soar even higher.
"Good work. Lay low for a while, both of you. I warned the Chief State Councillor, but who knows what he'll pull. And Cheonbong, next time we meet, bring something."
"What kind of thing, sir?"
"A palace map. A very detailed one."
"Wha?! A p-palace map?!"
Cheonbong freaked out.
Palace maps weren't for petty thieves.
State secrets—possessing one was high treason, wiping out three generations.
"No, Master, that's... even for me, that's impossible. I'd lose my head!"
"Who said steal it? Draw it yourself."
"Huh?"
"You knew the palace layout cold earlier. Transfer what's in your head to paper. Rat holes, guard patrols, eunuch quarters, and the path to the Imperial Consort's chambers at Gyeongtae Hall. Leave nothing out."
"G-Gyeongtae Hall?"
Cheonbong's eyes shook.
He looked like he couldn't commit to it.
But a glare, and he nodded.
"A... alright. I'll draw it as detailed as I remember."
"Good. I trust you."
These guys hang on my every word anyway.
After witnessing Yi Gil-dong the Taoist's divine powers, defiance was unthinkable.
Man, this is actually fun.
Playing Taoist is kinda addictive.
I get why Hong Gil-dong was always hopping fences and casting spells.
Maybe form my own Band of Righteous Thieves?
"Dismissed."
I sent them off and headed back to the clinic.
Back at the clinic, I couldn't sleep a wink.
Dopamine rush had my mind racing—no shut-eye.
The next day, after afternoon consultations, I locked the decoction room and dove into practice.
F-grade, sure, but I'd copied Master Heo's secret techniques by eye, bought cheap herbs from the market, and practiced dozens of times.
Today, success...!
"Hoo..."
I lit the brazier.
Gentle charcoal glow.
Filled the decoction vessel with clear water, grabbed the prepped deer antler, red ginseng, sea cucumber, and assorted other ingredients.
The best stuff available at market.
Blew my entire salary and the tips from helping the drill instructor's courtesans.
"Here we go."
Added ingredients, adjusted flame, timed it, ran [Mana Detection] full tilt to monitor the vessel's energy.
Now. Lower the heat.
Stopped fanning, dialed back the fire.
Too much yang energy, and it'd burn.
Tightrope walk.
Just making pills, but sweat poured like rain, eyes stung, arms ached.
One slip, and herbs to ash—par for the course.
That's how much focus I poured in.
How many hours passed?
Water reduced to dark red elixir.
Time to form it.
Extract, mix with honey, shape into pills.
All nerves in fingertips, roll into spheres.
But tricky.
Elixir hot and sticky; hands wouldn't obey.
Too much pressure, crumbles; too little, no form.
"Damn!"
Failed again and again, like always—smashed shapes, scattered energy.
Failed batches littered the floor.
Thought I had the feel, but still far off?
No. Ingredients left. Again.
Gathered remnants, tried anew.
Replayed Master Heo's handiwork in my mind hundreds of times, repeating endlessly.
And finally.
A dark red-glowing pill formed in my palm.
"Haa... haa..."
Success.
Tons of failures, but I did it.
With Pill Making (F)'s aid, relentless practice, and [Earth's Blessing]'s action buffs...
I poured my soul into it and barely succeeded.
Even leveled up the skill.
Then the decoction room door flew open.
"You rascal! What's this?! Lights on all night..."
Master Heo shuffled in, disheveled.
He spotted the failed batches on the floor and the pill in my hand—eyes went wide.
"No way, is that...?"
Master snatched the pill, turned it every which way, sniffed, scraped a bit to taste.
"...Heo."
A gasp escaped him.
"You made Wind Yang Pill on your own already? Unbelievable. That complex recipe, solo..."
"Sorry, Master. I wasted a lot of ingredients—still so unskilled."
I'd used some of my bought stuff, but clinic stock too.
Failures meant flushing them down the drain.
"Nonsense. This soon after learning? Remarkable. Most burn even decoctions after this much practice. Didn't expect you'd pick it up so fast. Well done. Truly gifted hands, my disciple."
But Master just smiled and praised.
"To gain such a disciple in my old age—how could I not rejoice?"
He hugged me, slapping my back in delight.
But I couldn't smile.
Master thought me a genius, but truth was different.
Dozens of failures after endless practice, skill help to make just one.
Not good enough.
If I'd used materials for Divine Pills now?
Obvious disaster.
Those precious, irreplaceable Four Spirits parts to ash—dream gone forever.
My current hands can't handle S-rank materials or spirit bodies.
I'm nowhere near Master's toes.
Sure, practice more, and someday.
But when's someday?
10 years? 20?
Live with 8.2cm that long?
No way. I'd rather die.
One path.
Boost skills.
Drastically.
Reward 1: 'Skill: Hand of God (C)'
📍 Condition: Alleviate symptoms for 10 VIP patients.
⏰ Progress:9 / 10
Hand of God it is.
That'll do it.
"Master."
"Yes?"
"Any... VIPs booked today?"
"None. Tomorrow at earliest. Why? Hands itching for more massage?"
"Yes. Dying to test my skills."
"Haha, eager lad. None today, but tomorrow's VIP is yours. You slaved all night—rest in your room till morning, recover."
Master left the room.
Tomorrow.
Tomorrow, I get Hand of God.