Give Up Already
"Give up already."
26. Give Up Already.
Tia Belberman. There had been a reason I gave her that name. A reason I named her after Justitia. To me, Justitia was like a lost hope that could always be returned to, and therefore she was always an existence filled with bright hope. When I wandered blindly, reaching out like a sightless man unable to find the path to my ideals, I could always find my way by looking at Justitia. When I felt swallowed by the thought that only misfortune remained for us, I could always find the road leading to my ideals by looking at Justitia. It wasn't just me. Everyone in the composite hunting party drew that same inspiration from Justitia, and that was how we had been able to walk all the way here.
I had seen that same image of Justitia in the Demon King. That night. The night when the meteor shower fell so violently it seemed ready to tear the entire vast sky apart. The night when the heavens warped as though a pitch-black canvas had been defiled by white paint. What she said to me that night became a new ideal for me, and I believed it was my new path.
Is choosing the lesser evil when the best option fails always the correct answer? Is it natural to flee into the lesser evil—where only certain darkness remains—because finding light in the best option is too difficult? If failure exists, then somewhere beyond it, absolute success must also coexist. That was what Pieta always told us. It was what Pieta said to Yuda, who despaired because he showed no affinity for magic while we were learning spells. Even if we failed as mages, that was not the end of every path forward. Even if we could not become mages ourselves, there were talents around us far more outstanding and excellent than we were, and it was our role to advance ahead of them while they paused, helping them wield their magic safely.
At the moment when everyone was shouting that magic alone was the answer due to an accidental manifestation of magic, Pieta had told us that. That was why I hated Tia Belberman. I hated the Demon King. If failure existed, then surely somewhere beyond it, invisible yet certain, success must have coexisted. Why deny that possibility? If there were many responsibilities to bear, if there were many things to protect, then shouldn't one cling even more desperately to that success? Rather than erasing the losses and indulging in brief respite, isn't it natural to crave eternal rest even if the losses are greater?
Coward. A true coward. She uses responsibility as an excuse to run away, terrified of losing everything. Terrified of losing this life, this Demon King's Castle, and everyone in it. Even though she has already taken everything from someone with her own hands, without exception. Even though she brutally murdered Yuda right in front of me.
"Haa… haaa…"
Tia Belberman. When I first called that name, a smile had hung on my lips and a bright voice laced with joy had flowed from my throat. But now—
"Tia Belbermaaan…!!"
Only pure hatred. Only seething rage remained.
With both wrists forcibly bound and suspended high, I had been made to stand upright, and before I knew it I was glaring at the one who had approached me again.
"You've grown."
"…I'll kill you…"
I was no longer bound in the Demon King's chamber. Several months had already passed since she bound me there and began my training. Several months had passed while I burned with nothing but loathing for her, unable to quell my seething rage. I truly spent my time imprisoned like a captive in this dark, dry yet damp room deep within the Demon King's Castle, with no soft bed, no clean clothes to change into, and no delicious feasts.
"…Your mental fortitude has improved remarkably."
My condition right now was better than ever. I could only conclude that now was better than any other time. Rather than being trapped like a doll in that childish, insane room, it was far preferable to be tortured and die here for real.
"This is the monster you created, Tia Belberman…!"
Thus I bared my fangs like a beast and glared at her, teeth clenched. Yet she showed no change in expression, only a dry response.
"I can no longer keep a dog that tries to bite its master by my side."
She drew closer and closer.
"So I shall personally pull out each and every one of your teeth."
But at those words, I only shouted back even more fiercely.
"After stealing everything from me, now you're going to take my teeth too…?!"
"Yes."
She answered without hesitation.
"It seems you keep forgetting, so I shall tell you one last time."
Her fingertips slowly traced along my jawline.
"You who mercilessly rejected my goodwill are nothing more than a slave who fell as spoils of war. Nothing more, nothing less."
When I shook my head to knock her fingertips away, she looked down at me with sharp eyes.
"I accept that I treated you too leniently. From now on, I will ensure you can never recall your past self by your own will."
However—
"I'm not spoils of war…!"
I was no longer the pathetic girl who cowered before the Demon King's false killing intent. After witnessing Yuda's death with my own two eyes, after causing a rampage in the Demon King's chamber only to be dragged here in the end, I had embraced both seething rage and burning resolve in my chest.
"I'm human!!"
My voice was steeped in madness more than ever before. Yet it was also filled with sincerity more than ever before.
"And I am the avenger of my only family—the one who will surely end you with these two hands…!!"
As I slowly bared my true fangs, the Demon King stared down at me for a moment before—
Crack——
"Kh…?!"
Merely meeting her gaze sent a sharp sensation through my mind, as though something inside me had broken.
"Understood."
She undid the shackles binding me.
"Kill me."
She said while massaging her own wrists, looking down at me as I knelt after being released.
"However, there is a condition."
Then, as I slowly began to rise with my heavy body—
"If you can wound my body even once right here and now, I will truly help you sever my neck with your own hands."
She straightened her tilted head and fixed me with a clear gaze.
"But if you fail to land even a single punch on me and instead get violated—"
Just as I had made my resolve, the Demon King had long since abandoned any thought of compromise.
"From this moment on, I will make you my flesh slave, thoroughly ignoring your mood and will, and use you as a tool to satisfy my pure desires."
She said "even once." Because she said even once. No matter what she said, I recalled old memories and raised both fists.
"…I accept that as agreement."
The Demon King stood relaxed, watching me. The moment I charged straight at her—
Thud. Crack———
The instant she grabbed my outstretched wrist, she drove her knee into my abdomen.
"Kuh-heoook———"
That single blow made me feel my organs being crushed, stomach acid rising, and I collapsed clutching my abdomen. Yet—
"Three minutes. Get up."
The Demon King was serious about settling our relationship. And so was I.
"Uwaaaah———!"
I pretended to stay down, then sprang up the moment she reacted and swung a powerful punch. Thud———
"Guh…!"
But just before it connected, her hand blade struck the side of my extended arm, staggering me, and then—
Crack———
"Uuuugh———!"
She used magic to make my body unbearably heavy, slamming me down so hard the floor cracked beneath me. Still, I struggled to break free of the magic and reach her with my fist. I reached out with my palm. Yet, as though it were predetermined fate, I was thrown to the floor, beaten, and rolled across the ground. Even after three minutes passed and I challenged her again and again, the Demon King deliberately toyed with me, letting my fingertips brush her only to pull away.
This was, in the end, my complete defeat, arranged from the very beginning no matter what I did.
However—
After I had charged and fallen countless times, she slowly approached and spoke her final words.
"Give up already."
Her last advice as Tia Belberman. Why had she said that? Was it because of the bond we had shared? Or was it all part of the Demon King's calculated plan? The Demon King, who feared everything too much and had to calculate and set everything in motion, had always lived that way. The moments I spent with her during her long life were surely nothing more than an instant, yet in that fleeting moment, the Demon King I saw was exactly that kind of existence. So even this was a calculated move to shake my easily manipulated heart.
Of course, the heart that had grown difficult to manipulate through our time together lightly ignored her voice. I scooped up the stone fragments that had formed when the floor cracked earlier and flung them into her face.
"Uwaaaah——!!"
I swung my final strike with everything I had. Even if I achieved victory this way, it was utterly despicable—but the Demon King had already done far worse. I, too, was willing to go this far—
Thud———!
The moment my fist finally reached her cheek after the long battle—
Thud———
At the same time, her tail, shaped like a long spear, flew in and pierced my neck.
"…Kuh, erk…"
As I tried to grasp the tail embedded in my neck with my left hand instead of the right that had thrown the punch—
"Time's already up."
The Demon King spoke in a small voice and tore my neck clean from my torso.
"Congratulations on becoming my body servant once more, starting today."
Thud———
She dragged my corpse away.
"I look forward to your service."
She tossed one final line into this horrific, wretched sensation I had not felt in so long.
"…"
Again. Defeated again. How many times was this now? After Yuda was brutally murdered before my eyes, I had tried again and again to take revenge on her from her side. But the Demon King, who would never leave me be, immediately bound me and tried to trigger my trauma. Yet to my already broken eyes, trauma or whatever else was invisible. Even though the Demon King, who had intended to end things by raping me appropriately, had finally come this far, she now had a clear justification to break me for certain. She was slowly beginning to get serious, and I would be trampled mercilessly by that seriousness, as though it were fate.
But I would no longer be trampled. Yuda's death had shattered my sanity, and I was no longer the Karia who came from being raped a few times. I would achieve my revenge. In the end, that was the final oath I made to Yuda, who disappeared while calling my name. The final oath I left for everyone. If my ideals were to be so brutally broken, then rather—rather than being killed by you countless times, it would be far better to devote my entire life to killing you.
"…"
After a long silence, I regained consciousness on the familiar bed and soon realized the familiar blindfold was covering my eyes.
"Demon King…!!"
I immediately moved my hands to remove the blindfold, but—
Clang——
Of course, my hands and feet were firmly bound by shackles and would not move.
"Ugh…"
A familiar collar seemed to be around my neck as well. As I curled my body, I realized this was the position she liked most—both hands gathered above my head, both legs spread and stretched out—when I felt a presence.
Swish———
I flinched and turned my head, then immediately clenched my teeth and began to be extremely wary. Creak———
"Ugh…!"
Without any preparation, I felt something hard, cold, and long being inserted inside me. Startled, my entire body trembled, and the moment I began to twist my waist and struggle against the foreign sensation—
"Even without foreplay, your body is always aroused."
The Demon King whispered while gently caressing my entrance.
"Hngh… shut up."
Yet even with my eyes covered, I knew where she was, so I glared in her direction and shouted.
"With those cheap hand movements of yours, I won't—!?"
"Hmm."
Though not long after, my waist jerked upward violently once.
"Haa, ahh…! Now, you're nothing…!"
Still, in an attempt to resist to the end, I tried to throw back all the words I had heard from her until I was sick of them.
"We'll see about that."
She threw back the words I had spat out until I was sick of them as well.
Thus, the training that had paused for a while began again. However, my rebellion had only just begun. Absolutely. I would absolutely take your neck. The neck of the one who took everything from me. Even if it's only your neck, in the end I will take it with these hands.
"Auuuugh…!"
"Compared to how you talk, you seem to like it too much."
But damn it. My body. My body is trembling…
"Shut uuuup… This, this is nothing…!!"