#2 - The Incompetent Phantom Thief Is Sloppy at the Finish
#2 - The Incompetent Phantom Thief Is Sloppy at the Finish
The basic premise of 'The Bird That Steals the Moon' goes like this.
There are artifacts that bring about disasters if left alone.
And if those artifacts are left unattended, this world will literally face destruction and come to an end.
Knowing this fact, the protagonist and heroine, the phantom thief Blanc, Sheria, uses the skills she learned from her master as a phantom thief to steal the artifacts and place them in designated locations to seal them away.
I fell into this world when I was five or six years old, and now that I'm an adult, I've lived in this world for over ten years. In other words, this world is basically my reality.
Thanks to that, with half a sense of duty to do what I must and half a desire to keep living in this world, I decided to use the skills I learned from Master to steal the first artifact, 'Karel's Silver Plate.'
'Karel's Silver Plate' is a silver plate located in the treasury of the Karel family, a lower-ranking noble house. At first glance, it just looks like an ordinary treasure. Even that isn't a particularly valuable one.
There's one problem, though. This 'Karel's Silver Plate' has been put up for auction. Because of the Karel family's debts.
In the end, before it gets auctioned off and completely disappears without a trace, I decided to infiltrate the Karel estate first and steal the item.
Just as I learned from Master, who was a phantom thief, I even sent a proper calling card....
[Before the third moon sets, I shall steal the silver plate - Phantom Thief Blanc]
First, I infiltrated the Karel estate, familiarized myself with the layout while planning....
"This is where I'll use a trap... and here, a magic tool...."
To avoid being discovered, I used color-changing magic to alter my eye and hair color, and put on the phantom thief outfit I had prepared in advance.
"I-is it a bit short...?"
The skirt being short was bothering me, but it was easy to move in, and it felt as close as possible to Master's outfit, so I liked it.
On top of that, I made full use of my game knowledge as well.
"From here, if I escape like this... then it'll work. Yeah, good."
Anyway, after finishing all my preparations like that, I decided to go steal 'Karel's Silver Plate' four days after sending the calling card, just as I had announced.
Why four days?
Because there was no moon last night, that's why.
It's just a simple trick that phantom thieves do.
*
The moment I arrived on the roof of the Karel estate, I checked the positions of the guards.
There aren't many guards. Even so, every single one of those guards is capable of subduing me effortlessly in a head-on fight.
Even though I'm a phantom thief, I basically have zero frontal combat ability.
I can't use lethal magic, I can't really use suppression magic either, and my hand-to-hand combat skills are even worse. All I'm good at is running away and performing simple magic tricks using magic.
But that's enough.
The stage has already been set, after all.
-Bang!
A simple light magic spell revealed my position through that light.
"Hello there, Karel family guards~ I'm the phantom thief Blanc~ Nice to meet you~"
When I used amplification magic to draw even more aggro, the private guards hired by the Karel family started rushing toward the roof where I was.
"The bitch who sent the calling card is over there!"
"Why the hell is that bitch up there!?"
"Someone get a ladder! Block the escape route too!"
The guards' shouting directed at me. I brushed off that shouting with ease.
"Oh my, I didn't know you'd like me so passionately~"
Of course, I was just teasing them.
Because if those guards lose their heads and get even more aggro drawn to 'me' standing in that spot, it would be perfect.
Thanks to the growing commotion, even the guards who were in other areas started moving, and as a result, the guards around 'my' location had practically disappeared.
Good, now I should buy a little more time, right?
"I didn't know I had this many fans~ But this Blanc is a very shy woman~ So everyone, see you later?"
-Poof!
White smoke and an explosion followed.
The mirror image that had been 'in my form' disappeared in an instant due to that smoke and explosion.
The real me was on the opposite side from where the aggro had been drawn, hiding on the roof near the treasury where the artifact was.
A surprise magic trick combining mirror image magic, light magic, amplification magic, and some simple explosion and smoke magic.
Everyone seems to be enjoying it quite a bit.
"What the hell, where did that bitch go!?"
"She couldn't have gone far! Find her!"
"Hey! Send some people to the treasury! She's definitely heading for the treasury!!"
Tsk, there were still some people keeping their cool.
I even provoked them from an angle where their underwear would show, and they still didn't get excited? If they had gotten excited, they wouldn't have made that kind of judgment.
It's a shame, but it doesn't matter. It's already too late anyway.
-Shoo! Shoo-shoo! Shoo! Shoo!
I started moving quickly here and there using the route I had scouted in advance.
I crawled through the vent, slipped inside through the vent exit whose screws I had loosened beforehand, and then....
-Pshhhhhhh!
"Gack! Keck!"
"What the... hell...."
-Thud!
-Thud!
Even sleep fog to put the guards here to sleep.
It's not harmful to the body, you'll just fall asleep, so just sleep soundly for a bit.
I apologized in my heart, then quickly moved right next to the treasury.
The moment I finally arrived at the corner right beside the treasury, two guards were still standing watch here to the very end. The way to shake off those two is simple.
-Click!
Just as planned, I turned off the light I had spotted earlier.
"W-what the!?"
"Turn the lights on! Quick!"
-Flicker!
The lights came back on, but the anomaly had already occurred.
"W-what the, why is the door open!?"
The two men, flustered by the open door, immediately rushed inside.
"Don't tell me... get inside! Hurry!!"
-Tap-tap-tap!
-Thud-thud!
The two men entered inside rather noisily, and the moment they went in, I threw sleep gas inside.
-Pshhhhhhhhhhh...!
-Thud!
-Thud!
After confirming that the two men had collapsed, I opened the door very leisurely and stepped inside.
Opening a locked door is something a phantom thief can do with ease. Of course, defeating guards in a head-on fight is impossible.
I walked leisurely toward the silver plate embedded in one corner of the treasury.
-Clink!
When I picked up the silver plate, it began to shine according to the angle I was holding it at.
"I'll be taking the silver plate with me."
Even though there was no one listening, I succeeded in taking the item with complete confidence. Because I'm a phantom thief, after all. It's an obvious result.
Leaving that obvious result behind, I cast a disguise magic on the silver plate just in case. That disguise magic that hides its appearance to match the surrounding environment.
After using the disguise magic like that, I tried to use the vent I had entered through earlier, but....
"...... This won't work."
It looks like the vent has already been blocked.
No choice, then. Time for Plan B.
A phantom thief must always prepare a sub-plan. I had prepared two escape routes.
One is the entrance, and the other is....
"Hello~"
Bribing Garald, one of the few direct servants and guards of the Karel family.
Garald is a direct servant and guard of the Karel family, but ironically, his loyalty is much lower than that of the private guards hired with money.
Why? Because he doesn't get paid much.
That's why in the game, if the original escape route was blocked, the standard strategy was to bribe Garald and escape through this back door.
The amount of bribe was quite large by early-game standards, so I shouldn't spend money here for future progression, but I have no choice.
"Garald, right?"
"... That's right."
... Was this character always this taciturn? No, that's not important.
"Garald, you're short on money, right? I'll give you that money, so could you let me escape from here?"
Now, Garald's answer should be....
'3000 gold'
"I can't."
"Yes~ I'll give you 3000 gold...... What?"
"I can't. This place... must be protected."
... What?
Must be protected? This place?
Garald, who's crazy about money?
"U-um...? Garald-nim...? D-do you... not need money...?"
"This place... must be protected...."
This is weird. Something's off.
Is this even a person? Is it a machine?
While I was confused, my tail was finally caught.
"The back door! They're heading for the back door!"
"Garald should be there, go after them!"
Garald can't be swayed with money. From the looks of it, seduction won't work either. Then there's only one thing left to do.
"Hyah...!"
-Flash!
Flash magic. I blinded Garald with that flash magic, then...!
-Tap-tap-tap!
I slipped to the side.
Yeah, I thought I could definitely get away.
-Swish! Grab!
"Ah...!"
Until Garald, whose eyes should have been blinded, grabbed my body.
-Whoosh! Smack!!
"Kyaa!!"
I was thrown to the floor.
I tried to get up and escape somehow, but....
"There she is!"
"Catch her!!!"
The pursuers had already chased me all the way here.
"T-this...! Then, o-other way...!"
I tried to find some other escape route somehow, but I was already surrounded by the Karel family guards.
Of course, I can't win in a head-on fight. Let alone against multiple opponents.
In the end....
-Stab! Stab! Stab! Stab! Stab!
-Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzt!!
"Ughhhhhhhhh...."
Like this, I was captured by the guards and violated.
