The Weight of Absence

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Before anyone realized it, the sky had ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠bruised into the amber hues of twilight.

The colossal mana barrier that once spanned the vast expanse of the Academy Northern Forest had shrunk to a circle barely a hundred meters across. Standing near its edge, Yelena Frost surveyed the dense thicket, her brow furrowed in a deep scowl.

"...Is Sian really not here?"

The placement exam was hurtling toward its final seconds, yet no matter how much territory she scoured, Sian was nowhere to be found. She had wanted nothing more than to cross swords with her once again.

Something felt fundamentally wrong. Even if this year's freshman class was hailed as an unprecedented gathering of prodigies, the Sian she knew was not someone who would fall to an ordinary first-year.

In fact, Sian's ability to read presences far exceeded her own. Sian would have effortlessly seen through the clumsy concealment arts of their peers; an ambush was out of the question.

A knot of suspicion tightened in her chest. Without breaking her train of thought, Yelena snapped her sword behind her in a ruthless arc infused with mana.

"Eek?!"

"Adele?! Dammit, run—gaaagh!"

A crescent of sunset-tinted blade light cleaved through both silhouettes in an instant. Dissolving into clouds of iridescent silver motes, the two students were forcefully ejected from the forest.

With a practiced flick of her wrist, Yelena cleared the phantom blood from her blade and swept her gaze across the clearing.

Whether by deliberate design or cruel coincidence, this tangled patch of woodland had become the final stage. The moment Yelena stepped fully inside the remaining perimeter, a luminous stopwatch conjured of pure mana materialized overhead.

"...Only one minute left?"

Yelena began extending her senses to locate the remaining survivors, but she caught herself, let out a quiet breath, and slid her sword back into its scabbard.

From the beginning, this exam was never about standing as the last one alive. Victory belonged to anyone capable of surviving within the perimeter until time expired.

Perhaps Sian's stealth was simply far greater than she had estimated. Yelena tried to brush aside the nagging disquiet, but—

"Ah."

Only then did she notice the strange dissonance within herself.

If this had been the person she was just days ago, she would have ruthlessly hunted down every remaining student without hesitation.

Yet here she was, unable to focus on the exam because her mind was consumed by thoughts of Sian. And simply because Sian was absent from her sight, an aching emptiness gnawed at her chest.

"Just what... is wrong with me...?"

The moment she acknowledged it, a sudden rush of heat flooded up her neck and burned into her cheeks. Yelena clamped her eyes shut, pressing a gloved hand over her scarlet face.

She could not banish the girl from her mind. She wanted to set Sian aside, to concentrate on the test, but the harder she tried to forget, the more vivid Sian became in her thoughts.

Never in the past eight years had she experienced such turmoil. Idle distractions were things to be buried in the dark recesses of her heart and discarded. That was how it had always been.

Eyes still shut, Yelena murmured faintly beneath her breath.

"A friend to cross swords with... huh..."

It was because of those words. It had to be.

Throughout her childhood, as she swung her blade from dawn until dusk, no one had ever truly stepped into her world.

There were only hypocrites drunk on moral superiority offering cheap pity, sycophantic wretches seeking to seduce her for personal gain, and nobles offering perfunctory words of comfort. Having severed ties with such people without mercy, the only person left by her side was the taciturn maid who had raised her since infancy.

Perhaps... perhaps deep down, she had secretly been yearning for someone to reach out to her—

"Phoo..."

Yelena exhaled a long breath, severing the spiral of thoughts. While she had been lost in reverie, the final minute had dissolved into nothingness.

Being apart from Sian left her restless and unfocused. In that case, the solution was simple: she would simply stand beside Sian and cross swords again.

"Once we're back, I'll spar with Sian."

Whispering softly, Yelena let her hand rest upon her hilt. She had not the slightest doubt that she would find Sian waiting in the grand auditorium.

Yet when the spatial magic subsided and the surviving students coalesced onto the polished marble of the auditorium, that familiar face was nowhere in sight.

In that instant, Yelena realized something had gone terribly awry.

Her stomach plummeted. A sickening chill seized her heart—what if something happened to her?

Sian was powerful enough to best even her in single combat. Her battlefield instincts were on par with any seasoned knight of the Northern Order. How could she possibly have failed an exam like this?

"That makes no sense..."

Her eyes scanned the crowded hall with mounting urgency until they locked onto a familiar instructor with fiery crimson hair: Elin Agnes, supervisor of the first-year Swordsmanship Department.

"...What did you just say? Two students are missing?"

"Yes, ma'am. Student number thirteen of Temporary Class A, Sian, and student number seventeen of Temporary Class C, Regina Strelitzia, are unaccounted for."

"Are there any signs of a breach through the boundary, or traces of spatial displacement magic? Could the barrier have suffered a temporary disruption?"

"Th-that is... according to the mages maintaining the perimeter, absolutely nothing crossed the boundary during the exam..."

"So you're telling me Sian and Regina simply vanished into thin air from inside an intact barrier? Surely you don't expect me to believe that is possible."

"B-but..."

"...Fine. If this were something that could be resolved through ordinary measures, you wouldn't have summoned me in the first place. Return immediately and verify whether any other department reported an anomaly."

"Y-yes, right away!"

Overhearing the exchange between Elin and the proctor, Yelena Frost stiffened. The words Sian is missing struck her like a physical blow, unleashing an uncontainable tide of dread.

A girl who ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠had never spared a thought for another soul could not comprehend this foreign sensation called 'worry.' All she understood was that her heart was hammering violently against her ribs.

What if she's gravely wounded? What if she's trapped in mortal peril? Dark, suffocating thoughts surged uncontrollably through her mind.

Blind to how uncharacteristic her actions were, and praying desperately that what she had just heard was a misunderstanding, Yelena strode forward and approached Elin.

"Excuse me, Instructor Elin."

"Hm? You're..."

"Temporary Class A, Student Number Two, Yelena Frost. Is it true that Sian is missing? I didn't mishear, did I?"

"...*Sigh*. Yes. You've already heard, so there's no point in concealing it. You heard correctly. Two students vanished without a trace during the exam. One of them is Sian, whom you know well."

"...What?"

The cold confirmation shattered what little composure Yelena had left.

Her emotionless, porcelain mask fractured completely. Concern, panic, terror—a chaotic storm of feelings flashed across her features. Yet Yelena lacked the presence of mind to care that her icy exterior had broken.

Her heart felt as heavy as lead, sinking into an abyss.

"We've hastily assembled a search party, Lady Elin."

"Deploy them into the forest at once. I will follow shortly. Searching will become infinitely harder once night falls, so don't wait on me."

"Wait, Instructor."

As Elin turned toward the exit alongside the proctor, Yelena reached out, her fingers catching the instructor's sleeve.

"Please. Put me ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠on the search team as well."

"Nnn..."

Drifting in a haze between sleep and waking, Regina groggily fumbled around her.

Desperate to feel Sian's warmth again just as she had before drifting off, the girl waved her frail arms through the empty air.

"Mmh...?"

Her fingers closed on nothing.

Just moments ago, her head had been nestled safely against Sian's chest. Now, only the freezing, unforgiving stone of the dungeon floor met her touch.

"...Ah?"

Her heart dropped into a bottomless void.

I fell asleep in Sian's arms. Why am I alone? Where is Sian? Where on earth did she go...?

"H-huuh... S-Sian...? Sian...?"

A biting dread wrapped around her like an icy shroud. Could it be... had it all been an illusion? A cruel mirage conjured by a mind driven mad by endless regressions...?

"S-Sian...! P-please... answer me! Where are you? I'm... so cold... gasp, hic..."

Consciousness was violently dragged to the surface. The damp subterranean air bit ruthlessly into her skin. When she was tucked inside Sian's embrace, it hadn't felt this freezing.

The only person who had ever acknowledged her existence across nine hundred and ninety-nine lifetimes. The only person who had shared her agony. The only person who had succeeded in fracturing 'destiny' itself... Had she truly just been a phantom of her broken mind?

"Please... please... a-answer me... please..."

The faint spark in Regina's voice guttered out. Ah, of course. She was merely a marionette shackled to the whims of destiny, dragged endlessly along whatever path fate decreed. A puppet had no need for a soul.

Why had a broken doll dared to harbor hope? Why had she wished for salvation? A puppet needed only to obey. Dolls had no use for feelings.

"Ahaha..."

A hollow, fragile laugh bounced off the cavernous stone. Regina slowly let her eyes drift shut.

The taste of hope she had encountered for the first time in millennia had been intoxicatingly sweet. And that was precisely why, shattered as she already was, she could not endure watching it slip away.

"U-uu... It's so... cold..."

Regina curled her small frame into a tight ball, trembling violently. Tears blurred her vision into darkness. Whispering that nothing mattered anymore, she surrendered to the cold.

"Regina? Sorry about that. I had to deal with the Death Knights while you were sleeping."

"Ah...?"

"I'm sorry. Come here, hold on to me."

And so, when Sian knelt beside her at the edge of her fading vision, Regina buried her face silently into her chest—clinging to that warmth like a child desperate for love.