The Beginning (2)

Yukino Hana's identity?

No — more than that, what did it mean that the prologue was over? Had this been a game the whole time?

"Hmm... Okay!"

I had no idea what any of this was, but I figured I might as well check.

The information window unfurled in front of my eyes with a long, rustling sweep.

"What even is this...?"

The backstory was way too pitiful. Why would anyone want to be an idol when they couldn't sing or keep a beat?

If you picked at the details, the setting wasn't actually all that airtight. In particular, it said absolutely nothing about Yukino Hana's original family. I had a pretty good idea why.

"Because watashi's kazoku is in Korea."

If the Yukino Hana who had lived in Japan still had a family over there, I would suddenly have two. That would have gotten messy, no question.

There was also nothing about how she was supposed to keep paying for a life in Korea. The original me had been living on the allowance my parents sent.

Anyway, once I had read the information window through to the end and closed it, something dropped out of thin air with a soft tuk.

"Kore wa...?"

A passport, and a Japanese ID. The reward for the Main Quest had actually given me Yukino Hana's identity — a person who, originally, would never have existed at all.

"Still, I should check, just in case..."

I sat down at the computer and started searching. The subject, of course, was Yukino Hana.

A normal search turned up nothing. More precisely, it turned up nothing but the wrong things, over and over, until I was sick of them.

"Come to think of it, watashi's name was a song title..."

Yukino Hana. Literally, it meant snow flower. It was a fairly famous Japanese song title, and in Korea it was just as well known as a remake used for a drama OST. Naturally, searching the name flooded the results with nothing but information about that song.

So I stopped searching the name and tried another angle. First I looked up the address printed on the passport and the ID.

"It's there!"

The detailed address in Kanagawa Prefecture, Japan, belonged to a house that genuinely existed. Whether it was truly the house Yukino Hana had lived in was another question entirely.

I checked the visa situation too. Japanese citizens can stay in Korea visa-free for a hundred and eighty days. Past that, you either get a visa or go back to Japan and come again. Considering my goal was the college entrance exam, maybe I could get a student visa?

"Wait...! Can foreigners even take the college entrance exam?!"

I had become a complete Japanese person. Not mixed — a Japanese national who actually lived abroad. So could a foreigner sit for the exam? I had no idea. I looked it up.

Fortunately, even foreigners could take it if they had a high school diploma or the equivalent.

"Watashi did graduate high school, right...?"

I was twenty-one, so I was definitely an adult. But what if the information window didn't recognize the graduation? That was the kind of problem you got when you had no idea what kind of life the original Yukino Hana had lived.

The information window told me not to worry, and I let out a sigh of relief.

"...Eh?"

A Main Quest, spawned out of nowhere. This time the content was to tell my family. Judging by the number tacked on the end, that meant three people: Mom, my stepdad, and Sea. I was supposed to tell every last one of them, no one left out.

"That's way too hayai!"

I knew I had to do it. I did. But it was so sudden! Just asking Sea about it indirectly earlier had felt like it was going to kill me.

So I wasn't supposed to let the quests jerk me around — just clear them at my own pace? I appreciated the consideration. It was still just as stressful.

♬♩♪

"Hyat!!"

The sudden ring of the phone made me jump so hard my whole body started shaking. Someone was calling me.

Almost nobody ever called me first, which made the someone very easy to identify.

"Doushite now of all times...?"

I sat there trying to decide what to do. Was picking up Sea's call the right choice?

My voice right now was Yukino Hana's voice — a tone no one who heard it would ever doubt belonged to a woman. Which meant that if I answered this call, I would have no choice but to tell ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠the truth.

Sea had said she would accept me no matter how I changed. But that answer had definitely not been given with a change of gender in mind. If I confessed that I had become a woman, how would she react?

The phone kept ringing. I clutched it, fidgeting, bouncing my feet in place and getting nowhere.

"Watashi! What am I supposed to do?!"

I was self-aware enough to know I had fallen into a serious panic. The problem was that I had absolutely no idea how to get out of it.

Honestly, if I had to pick which family member to tell the truth to first, I would have rather told my stepdad than Sea.

Mom was uncomfortable for a whole tangle of reasons, and I didn't particularly want to talk to her. My stepdad, on the other hand, looked after me and treated me well even though I wasn't his blood. That care and attention had never felt like a burden.

And Sea... she was a good kid. So outstanding it felt like more than I deserved, just sharing a family with her. She had been good to me, too — the same way my stepdad had.

It might have sounded strange, but that was exactly why Sea made me even more uncomfortable, and why I kept avoiding her. The difference from my stepdad was a difference of position.

A parent being better than me, kinder than me, treating me well — that was fine. I could take that. But Sea was, without question, my little sister. The fact that my little sister outshone me at everything and still treated me with that same gentle care was more than enough to stir up a mess of complicated feelings.

The closer Sea came, the more the inferiority and the sense of defeat piled up. A vicious cycle born from how pathetic I was, I supposed.

So I left home. The biggest reason I put distance between myself and my family was Sea.

I had thought I would live like that for the rest of my life. Now the situation had changed. So could things get better...?

I didn't know. No matter how much my face and my gender had changed, maybe the person I was never would. In that case, a loser like me, no matter what I did...

"Eh...?"

I thought a message had just popped up. It vanished before I could read it properly.

"Hauu... What should watashi do?!"

Anyway, the problem in front of me was still whether to pick up Sea's call or not. I had to make a once-in-a-lifetime choice.

Click.

The call ended. I had ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠hesitated too long, and it dropped through as a missed call.

"...Did I take care of it?"

The cliché line slipped out before I could stop it.

Ping!

A text notification followed immediately. It was from Sea. I didn't open the chat — I just hurriedly checked the previews.

Ping!

♬♩♪

The ringtone started up again. Dead in the center of the screen, the caller ID read Lee Se-ah.

"...Sea-chan. Are you mad?"

No. Our Sea would never get angry. I had never seen her like that. I ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠had never even imagined it.

But the texts definitely seemed to get colder and stiffer the further they went. Was that just me?

Reason was screaming at me to pick up already. My body just trembled and refused to obey.

In the end, I let the last chance slip through my fingers too.

Click.

Another missed call. Then the notification chime again.

Ping!

I realized for the first time today that that cute little sound could be terrifying.

The message was painfully simple.

"...I'm so dead."