Coming to Meet You (2)
"Mama!"
What on earth was going on?
I was so startled that, for a split second, I thought the child who'd come running into my arms wasn't Little Hana at all. But no matter which way I looked at her, it was unmistakably the Little Hana I knew.
"Uh... Nashi-chan?"
I was still standing there, at a complete loss, when the girl her age beside Little Hana blurted out in surprise.
"Hana, is that your mom?"
"Yep! That's right!"
"Eh..."
She answered so naturally I nearly bought it myself. It was such a perfect reaction that no one would have dreamed it was a lie.
Even the kindergarten teacher, who'd been watching from the side, asked carefully, a puzzled look crossing her face.
"Um... are you really Hana's mother?"
"That's... uh, well..."
How had things suddenly gone this way?
If this were nothing more than one of Little Hana's mischievous pranks, I could laugh it off, deny it, and that would be the end of it. But the way the little girl had buried her face against my knees made it impossible to feel like this was just a joke.
"...As far as I know. That, um..."
The teacher trailed off, glancing between Hana and the child beside her. From the look of it, she already had a rough idea of Hana's family situation.
"...Ah. Ah! I understand!"
"Huh?"
I still hadn't figured it out myself, and she'd already understood? Maybe that was what it meant to be a teacher of children. A wave of genuine respect washed over me.
I met her eyes and sent her a pleading look that begged for a hint. The sharp-eyed teacher nodded and offered one.
"I see. I had no idea... Somehow Hana's face has been so much brighter lately."
The fact that Little Hana's face had been brighter was the hint? Honestly, I wasn't that clever, and that alone wasn't nearly enough to find the answer. A little more of a direct hint would have been nice!
"Anyway, I'm really glad. Hana can be a bit lively and she plays a lot of pranks, but she's such a good, sweet child."
"Ah, she is, isn't she...?"
"I believe that even if you aren't related by blood, love is more than enough."
I agreed with that. Sea and my step-father weren't my blood family either, and they still treated me like family and loved me. But why was she saying that all of a sudden?
"Then will you be coming every day from now on, Mother?"
"......"
Alright. I had no choice but to admit it.
The teacher had simply gotten the wrong idea. There was no special twist. She'd fallen for Little Hana's act hook, line, and sinker, and was now firmly convinced that I was Hana's new stepmother.
"Mother?"
Of course, the right thing to do was to clear up the misunderstanding. There was no telling what kind of butterfly effect this mix-up might set off, so I ought to tell her the truth here and now.
I knew that was the right thing. And yet the words wouldn't come out of my mouth.
There was only one reason. Hana.
Why had Little Hana, who usually called me Big Brother, called me Mama? Was it just a prank? Was that really all it was?
Maybe...
Maybe this was something she wanted. A mother who came to pick her up, the way other kids' mothers did. Parents who showed up chatting and smiling with the teacher to take their child home.
It was a happiness she'd never once been allowed to have. Something she couldn't help envying because she was the only one without it. Just like me, when I was little.
So I decided to go along with the lie. The kindergarten teacher was a stranger who had nothing to do with me, wasn't she? No one would get hurt just because I told a lie.
"Um... are you perhaps Japanese?"
"Hai."
"Aha. How fascinating. Ah, I'm sorry—I don't mean that in a bad way. I've just never seen an international marriage around here."
"It's alright."
I exchanged a brief greeting with the kindergarten teacher. Afraid the lie might come undone, I ducked anything too specific, and somehow we managed to wrap it up cleanly.
"Hana, take care on your way."
"Yes. Goodbye, Teacher!"
"Shall we go, then, Nashi-chan?"
"Okay!"
Last of all, Little Hana waved to the friend standing beside her.
"I'm going first!"
"Okay. ...Hana, tell me later!"
"Got it!"
We left the kindergarten with our hands tightly clasped. The walk home was so short it took all of three minutes, and as we headed back I traded all sorts of conversation with Little Hana.
"The kid next to you earlier—tomodachi?"
"Huh?"
"Your friend?"
"Yeah! That's Saetbyeol!"
What a pretty name. After that, the chatter wandered into the little things that had happened at kindergarten that day. And when we were almost home, I brought it up as if it were nothing.
"Nashi-chan. Why did you call watashi Mama today?"
"Mm. That's, well. Because..."
Little Hana paused for a beat, then looked up at me and smiled with perfect innocence.
"Just because!"
"Hee. Just because?"
"Yeah. Like a prank, I guess."
"Sou ka. Wakatta."
Whether the answer was honest or a lie, I couldn't tell. In truth, I didn't think it mattered much. Little Hana looked happy, and I didn't feel all that bad about it either.
"Hey, are you going to come pick me up every day from now on?"
"Hmm. What would Nashi-chan like me to do?"
"I..."
"I'll come."
"...Really?"
Surprise filled the eyes that had gone wide. I nodded and smiled.
"Yeah. When Master can't make it, watashi will come get you."
Today was supposed to be the day Master had promised, without fail, to come pick her up himself. Little Hana had probably been waiting and waiting for her dad to appear. That kind of waiting was terribly inefficient. It was only a three-minute walk, after all. Even counting the round trip, it wouldn't take more than ten minutes at the longest.
So. Since it only took ten minutes... it would be fine if I did it.
"...Thank you."
Little Hana's voice, answering with her head bowed, was trembling just a little, for some reason.
Hyunsoo raked his fingers through his hair in irritation and hurried into the car. He turned the key and checked the time: already 8:30. An unexpected problem had cropped up in an important project at the office, and dealing with it had made him late.
"...Hana."
She'd be worried sick. Days like this, when he ran this late, were rare—but whenever he did, Hana always sat alone on the sofa, curled in on herself, waiting for him. She was still too little to put together a proper dinner on her own. What if she was going hungry?
The worry gnawed at him. He grabbed his phone and called again. Once more, no one picked up. He'd tried her any number of times the moment work ended, sent message after message, and still nothing came back.
Had something happened? The anxiety burned a hole through his stomach.
No. She'll be fine.
He'd asked the young woman next door, hadn't he? He'd been so determined that today, of all days, he would pick Hana up himself. All sorts of stray thoughts circled through his head, needling at him.
Calm down. Think it through one thing at a time.
Of course he'd tried Yukino as well. She didn't pick up either. With both of them unreachable, the unease only grew. Even if she was an adult, she was still a woman on her own; it wasn't as if the chance of something going wrong was zero.
But it wouldn't be that. This wasn't a bad neighborhood, was it? He'd picked this place with such care, choosing and choosing again, all for Hana. So it would be fine.
He repeated it until it was practically self-hypnosis, but the anxiety didn't go anywhere. In that restless, disordered state he floored the accelerator. Even with speed cameras along the route, Hyunsoo's car paid them no mind at all, blowing well past the limit. A fine was the last thing that mattered right now.
Every worst-case scenario that could possibly happen unspooled through his mind like a simulation. The result of all that driving was that he reached home a full twenty minutes earlier than usual.
He didn't even bother parking properly. He was out of the car at once and running with everything he had. He sprinted until his thighs felt ready to split, and the moment he reached the door he wrenched it open as if he meant to tear it off.
"Hana!!"
Inside, it was pitch dark.
"...Hana?"
A silence so cold it raised goosebumps was all that came to greet him. He forced his shaking voice steady and called his daughter's name again, and still no answer came.
No one was there.
Why was no one there? It was well past eight. She wasn't the kind of child who would go out alone at an hour like this.
Hyunsoo panicked. He couldn't even have said how to describe the hideous fear of it; he only stood there trembling, like a man flailing in a vicious swamp, with no idea what to do. His breath came too fast. Hyperventilation. A pain so fierce it felt as if the world were coming apart at the seams, and everything went dull and blurred. His chest swelled as if it would burst, pounding so hard it shook his whole body.
"Hah... hah...!"
He forced the air in and out until he had just barely calmed himself, then leaned against the wall.
What was he supposed to do now?
Yukino Hana. He had to find her. If she had truly gone to pick Hana up the way he'd asked, she would know the answer.
Having clawed his reason back at last, Hyunsoo stepped out into the hallway without even putting his shoes on properly. That it should be the hardest few staggering steps of his entire life, when it was only a handful of paces...
"...The door."
It was open. Why?
Did this open door have something to do with what was happening now?
Walking into someone else's home without the owner's permission was unlawful entry. Hyunsoo was so far gone he had forgotten even that elementary fact. He went inside, and unlike his own dark apartment, a bright fluorescent light came out to meet him. What was the same was the cold silence.
What in the world was going on? His head throbbed. He was so exhausted he could hardly imagine anything further.
That was when he caught it—a presence from the inner room beyond, breaking the hush.
"...Yukino?"
Someone was in that room. Hyunsoo took his steps slowly, one after another. He understood it by instinct: every truth was hidden in there. The time had come to face it. Whatever shocking reality waited on the other side of that door, in the end he would have no choice but to accept it calmly.
Because that was fate.
"......"
And then Hyunsoo found them.
Two girls, asleep on a snug bed. If the two of them, so far apart in age, had anything in common, perhaps it was that they shared a name.
Yukino Hana and Bae Hana. They had been waiting for a Hyunsoo who never came, playing happily in Yukino's apartment until they dozed off without meaning to. That was the shocking truth Hyunsoo had discovered.
"...Hehe. Sushi oishii."
Miss Yukino, drooling as she sleep-talked in perfect peace. And his daughter, tucked deep in her arms, nuzzling her face against her chest.
"Mama..."
That warm embrace seemed to stir something maternal in her.
"...Haha."
He couldn't have said why, but Hyunsoo kept letting out hollow little laughs.