Loss, Preparation (1)
Loss, Preparation (1)
A white trail appeared across the sky. It was a line like lightning spreading sideways. The jaggedly branching trajectory soon came to a halt in a corner of the isolated city.
From the point where the line stopped, a rain of lightning fell. No rain, no dark clouds—only lightning poured down. White lightning. The shafts of light, like enormous trees, shook the earth without mercy.
The disturbance wrought by merely two monsters carried an overwhelming authority reminiscent of a mythical battle.
“Whoa~”
White Dabih let out an exclamation of awe.
“Sumimasen~! Are we fighting that?”
“Are we going to fight that...?”
“Ah, hai! That!”
“Absolutely not! Don’t even think about it!”
Jo Ah-yoon recoiled and stopped her. Far away, the sky was angrily and diligently hurling thunderbolts.
She understood now that he was fighting somewhere so distant she could no longer even see him. Under those conditions, magical girls entering the battle would only become a considerable burden on him.
Especially with that destructive fighting style that disregarded self-defense, just like moments ago.
“Yes, understood!”
White Dabih grinned and nodded. She tightened the arm that was holding Jo Ah-yoon, pulling her closer. A voluptuous body, unbelievable for a teenage girl, wrapped around her like a cushion. Jo Ah-yoon was not the least bit happy about it.
“You were worried about boku (me)! Thank you!”
Obviously not. Jo Ah-yoon had not been worried about this pointlessly high-strung and rude magical girl. She was worried about her own brother, who was right now churning through that downpour of lightning.
“....”
“Kyaa, senpai is a tsundere! Honestly~ if you’re worried, you should just say you’re worried!”
But it was too much trouble to retort, and it seemed like it would only start a pointless argument, so she stayed silent. Even after only exchanging a few words, Jo Ah-yoon already disliked White Dabih.
Had her pre-amnesia self, who had worked as a magical girl, actually been on friendly terms with someone like this? It was astonishing. From what she’d seen before, she didn’t seem to manage her image much, either.
“Hey White... Dabih.”
“...?”
“Wh-what, why are you looking at me like that.”
“Wh-why are you looking at me like that...? Turning so serious is frightening! Why aren’t you calling me Jjokbari like usual?”
Ah, so they hadn’t been friendly. Jo Ah-yoon was satisfied with the conclusion. She realized that it wasn’t that she and this girl were close; the girl had simply approached her unilaterally.
Rumble. The thunder still raged intensely. It beat the sky like a drum, sending out wave after wave. Red Vega, who had been watching the scene with concern, asked,
“...Unnie, what do we really do?”
“This has actually worked out well for us.”
Blue Sirius let out a deep sigh, then placed her hand on the gem near her chest.
“Altair. Have you roughly assessed the situation?”
[Yes... it’s hard to see clearly because of the lightning. They’re just fighting each other to the death. Both monsters are estimated to have expended considerable starlight. They’ll probably not have any strength left to attack civilian homes after this battle. Well... they wouldn’t have attacked in the first place if someone hadn’t interfered.]
Every magical girl present could hear Orange Altair’s voice. Every magical girl shifted their gaze to White Dabih.
White Dabih swept her eyes over the gathering, then nodded with eyes full of resolve.
“Wakarimashita (Understood)! This unworthy Haru Otonashi! Will atone for her sins with death....”
“Hey hey, what stupid bullshit is that! I don’t know what you did, but dying is....”
“Hoo... calm down.”
She had touched the sharp point of the horn to her throat. Jo Ah-yoon, right next to her, panicked, and Blue Sirius placed a hand to her forehead as if she had a headache and sighed.
“What good would dying do? Then you wouldn’t even get to receive your punishment in the Association’s basement, and it would all be over. Don’t even think about taking the easy way out today.”
“...Hai (Yes).”
White Dabih slumped listlessly.
“Right. First, focus as much as possible on evacuating and protecting nearby civilians, since we don’t know how far the shockwaves from that fight will spread. It’d be nice if they both collapsed from fighting each other... but such good fortune probably won’t happen. While concentrating on protection, also make sure you’re ready to deal with whichever monster is left after the fight.”
Blue Sirius, who had been adeptly directing the magical girls, placed her hand on her forehead again.
“Ah, we’ll have to analyze that monster again too... ah, seriously.”
Blue Sirius was someone who never vented her frustration no matter what enemy they faced. The other magical girls grew tense at this reaction, so clearly different from her usual self. Jo Ah-yoon felt the same.
‘What’s gotten into that senior of all people...’
‘No matter how fast we finish this, I won’t have time to meet Jae-jung again today... ugh, I wish all the monsters would just die. Die, die, die, just die already!!!’
That lament wasn’t even a fraction of the stress Blue Sirius was currently under. Suppressing complaints and irritation she couldn’t even put into words, she barely managed to stay composed.
“Anyway, let’s all split up and do what we have to do now. Dabih, especially you, no more pointless....”
“Um, this humble one... has something to say!”
“If it’s nonsense, I’ll shove ice straight down your throat. What is it?”
“About the monster that just appeared... I believe we may not need to register it as new.”
White Dabih quickly continued before anyone could reprimand her.
“I have evidence! First! It paid absolutely no attention to us and showed the habit of charging only at the other monster! We know a monster like this! Second! Its appearance before it was covered in all that lightning! This also very closely resembled a monster we know! Although the color was white and it was festooned with decorations I hadn’t seen before... we all know that the monster we’re familiar with transforms into various forms, don’t we? Like something out of a cheap old hero anime.”
Red Vega’s resolute expression slowly became overlaid with horror.
“Boku (I) predict that monster is the Big Dipper!”
“...Ar-are you sure?”
Red Vega asked White Dabih. She looked somehow agitated.
“Of course I’m not absolutely certain, but... as far as I can tell, it’s about 100%! 100%!”
“Oh no....”
At White Dabih’s declaration, Red Vega sat down in stunned dismay.
“What did I just do....”
“Yes, it certainly makes sense.”
Blue Sirius nodded in agreement too. As if nothing had happened, White Dabih was all smiles again and scratched the back of her head.
“Ahaha... yappari (as I thought), maybe I’m a genius?”
“Of course, it’s still too early to be sure.”
Blue Sirius murmured in a troubled voice.
“And besides... that guess would imply that monster has obtained even greater power. It was hard enough already, and now an even worse monster than before....”
“S-senpai.”
Jo Ah-yoon’s mouth itched to speak. She wanted to shout that it wasn’t true.
“...Ah-yoon.”
But she couldn’t say it. Blue Sirius watched her with apologetic eyes. Jo Ah-yoon felt a pointless guilt.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t look after you properly. I should have taken better care of you... I, I made this kind of mistake again... I’m sorry. I’m truly sorry....”
“H-hey, what are you talking about, senpai. That monster is the bad one, not you. What’s wrong with you.”
Rubbing her aching side, Jo Ah-yoon smiled bitterly.
“I’m fine.”
Telling the truth would only cause trouble for everyone anyway. It would concentrate unnecessary attention and scrutiny on Han Jae-jung, and it would do nothing but add to the mental burden of Blue Sirius, who had to defeat the monster.
‘Why did his transformed form have to look just like a monster....’
And besides, hadn’t the form he had just shown looked like a monster no matter who saw it? Misunderstandings could only deepen. Everyone would just end up hurt.
‘Why did that idiot oppa get a dream like that.’
What was a Guardian worth? When the people supposedly being protected didn’t even feel protected, were attacking him, were trembling in terror.
What meaning is there in a dream like that? What meaning is there in an unacknowledged dream? What meaning is there in a dream no one understands?
All he would receive was hatred, and all he would possess was mere self-satisfaction.
A dream is a misfortune.
What one reaches after overcoming countless unimaginable hardships is nothing but a small peace of mind, a small satisfaction.
No. He wouldn’t even reach it. An abstract goal has no answer.
He would struggle to fill that desire until the very end, and even when he finally lost his life, he would be regretting and lamenting.
Jo Ah-yoon’s stomach churned. She lamented the fact that the one who might face that miserable end could be the man she cherished.
A dream is a misfortune.
How terrible a life must it be, to hold onto a goal that seems utterly impossible in reality and live clinging to it.
But precisely because of that, there is something one can feel. There is something visible when one watches those dreamers from the outside.
A dream is a misfortune. At the same time, it is a challenge.
One who does not give up in the face of any ordeal or pain is beautiful.
Even if a dreamer is miserable, they are beautiful.
She gazed at the far-off place where the booming lightning was still falling. She thought of him, somewhere so distant she couldn’t reach or even see him, continuing a battle no one would praise.
“Whoa-ack! I think we need to respond quickly!”
“Huh? Yes, yes! First! We have to... do our jobs... yes... I’m not a bad bitch who hits someone without even knowing their face... I’m the star who protects the citizens....”
“First, you get to safety, Ah-yoon.”
Worried about the lightning’s shockwaves, the magical girls initiated their actions. Jo Ah-yoon responded to Blue Sirius, who was looking at her with deep concern, by nodding her head.
’...Okay. I’ll run away, just like oppa said.’
She had no power of her own, so staying would only be a nuisance.
‘But oppa, you have to come back too.’
Because if he didn’t, she’d follow him, somehow. She would not forgive him for disappearing on his own this time.
A faint gleam appeared in the metal ball floating near Jo Ah-yoon.
**
“Um... y-you really don’t have to go this far....”
“No way!”
Some time after the disturbance had mostly subsided, one magical girl still remained at Jo Ah-yoon’s side.
“I know the story about Deneb-unnie! You were kidnapped by a monster once before, right? And you awakened your magical girl powers there! A kidnapping must have definitely left you with strong trauma! I can’t pretend not to see an Unnie who’s holding in the pain and acting like she’s fine on the outside!”
“Haha....”
Jo Ah-yoon laughed awkwardly.
‘I’m not Deneb. And what’s that story? I did that? I don’t remember it at all. And this is burdensome. It’s uncomfortable. You know me, but I don’t know you...!’
She chewed over those feelings, then spat them out.
“Red Vega, you’re making me uncomfortable. You’re annoying, so go to your own house.”
“Huhu, did you think I, who’s been forged by Unnie’s sharp tongue, would back down from a comment like that? You’re weaker than usual. It’s proof you’re that exhausted, right?”
“Ah, fuck, I said don’t follow me.”
“That’s more like you, Unnie!”
Jo Ah-yoon was dumbfounded.
‘No, what the hell kind of things have I been saying as I go around. Just what kind of things did I usually say to a virgin kid.’
“No, I said fuck off!”
Cursing her past self, she also cursed in all sorts of ways in the present, but Baek A-hee just followed her with a big grin on her face.
In the end, she followed her all the way to Jo Ah-yoon’s house. The way she followed the path naturally suggested she had probably visited her home several times before.
“You seriously have to drink this and then leave, you hear me?”
“Whoa, cocoa! I love this~ Thank you, Unnie!”
“No, what kind of kid is this shameless....”
Baek A-hee’s hands, as she puffed and blew on her cocoa, were trembling slightly. Jo Ah-yoon felt something instinctively.
’...This kid, she doesn’t want to be alone. Partly she was worried about me, but she also needs someone to be with....’
She seemed anxious somehow.
‘Well, of course. A battle would be terrifying for a kid who isn’t even 20 yet.’
Even Jo Ah-yoon, who had not been a direct party to the battle, had been overwhelmed by that fear. Each of the attacks flying in from all sides was more than enough to tear fragile human flesh and end a life.
“...At least eat dinner before you go.”
“Really? Wow! I love you, Deneb-unnie! See, you really are a tsundere~”
“I told you I’m not Deneb anymore. And don’t say things like that.”
She guessed her old self had probably gotten along well with this kid.
“What do you want? I was thinking of just ordering delivery....”
Ding-dong.
Just then, the doorbell rang.
“Ooh~ delivery systems are great these days! Automatic delivery the moment you imagine it! And fast, too!”
“As if. Wait here. I’ll go check.”
Without hesitation, Jo Ah-yoon went to the front door and opened it.
“Ah-yoon... I’m going to take a quick bath... ugh, the sweat is no joke....”
It was Han Jae-jung. He naturally stepped inside the entrance, took off his shoes, and set foot in the house. Jo Ah-yoon didn’t even have a chance to stop him. Without even having been able to greet him on his return, she now had to stop him.
“Ah, o-oppa, wait a sec!”
“Huh? Why all of a sudden... Miss Vega?”
“...Mister Jae-jung?”
The three people who had been at the battlefield moments ago met.