The Weary Girl's New Choice
Even after the string of fires and accidents at the monastery, Morgana had never been able to leave. The Crown Prince had also failed to appear at the debutante ball. In the end, everyone had been played for fools by idle rumors.
At the time, Pay had felt nothing but endless sorrow, but looking back now, something had felt terribly wrong.
What if…?
What if the same people who had set the fire, familiar with the monastery’s layout, had escaped safely and then, just as Dot had done to Pay, finished the job by staging a collapse to cover up the murder?
It was only a guess with no evidence, yet the truth could have been far crueler.
Who would have imagined that the friend she had trusted most would deceive her and send her to her death?
Wait. If I’ve returned two years into the past, then the Klein Duke, who will soon receive the oracle, should be arriving any moment.
If events unfolded exactly as they had before, the Duke would ask Mother Superior Beryl for a quiet, obedient girl to serve as an Eina candidate.
And then…
Even if I know what’s coming, what good will it do? They weighed me against Dot and hurt me all the same. Even when they refused to acknowledge Dot as their real daughter, they were still cold to me.
Pay’s mind was in turmoil over everything that lay ahead.
Just because time has changed, does that mean the pain disappears or the events never happened? Even if the future shifts, the wounds I suffered remain! I died. Because of the girl you believed was your daughter and your sister!
People had always swarmed around her, yet Pay had been tormented by a crushing loneliness.
The Eina system, meant to foster friendships that transcended social status, had only made her life unbearably difficult.
The Klein Ducal House…
Now that she understood the truth and had been given a second chance at life, she no longer saw it as a happy place filled with her real father, mother, and family.
Those cold-hearted people had always suffocated her, and Dot’s presence had been a constant source of torment.
The phrase she had heard most often during those two years echoed in her mind.
“Know your place.”
It was something they would never have said if they had seen her as a person in her own right.
The ducal household employed countless servants. Even in front of the maids, the Duchess never stopped hurling cruel words at Pay.
Then there was that day, the day before the real noble daughter Dot drove Pay out of the monastery. Dot had summoned her and said…
“From now on, your life at the monastery comes down to three rules: watch your mouth, watch your mouth, and watch your mouth. The moment you dare to claim you once had any connection to our Tiana in this household—”
“What?”
“The monastery, which will continue to need our support, and you yourself will lose every last tie to this family. Forget Tiana’s old name as well. Do you understand?”
For Pay, who had nowhere else to go but the monastery, it had been a truly terrifying threat.
Perhaps the Duchess was even crueler than Dot.
Do you know what you did to me?
While pretending to scold the fake daughter clinging to her side, the Duchess had smiled kindly at Dot, welcomed her into her embrace, and sent Pay down the road to death without ever softening her cold words.
Even the usually stern Duke had handed her a pouch of gold coins, saying she had worked hard.
I was the Klein daughter’s Eina.
He had promised to reward her fairly and to shower endless generosity upon Grace Monastery when he took her in.
Liar!
“Enough. I don’t need any of it!”
Overcome with rage, Pay roughly yanked at the ruby pendant around her neck.
Now that she had glimpsed even a fragment of the truth, she could no longer endure it.
Destroy it. Destroy everything! She would sever every last connection between herself and them, exactly as they had wanted.
When the gold chain refused to break, she tugged at the clasp until her fingers turned red, then hurled the pendant against the wall. Still furious, she whipped her head away.
The modest room contained only a bed, a desk, and a shabby wardrobe. A flat, inexpensive slab of marble had been placed there to help ward off the heat, prepared by the monastery for the nuns and novices who came to work.
You never showed me even this much kindness.
Her vision clouded with anger, Pay snatched up the marble slab and raised it high above the fallen ruby pendant.
The red gem sparkled desperately, as if begging her not to destroy it, but she no longer needed it. She wanted every bond with the Klein ducal family to shatter along with it.
You abandoned me.
In this life, I will abandon you first. Forever.
Crack!
Yet marble was never a mineral that could defeat ruby.
For a long while, the only sound in the room was the grinding of the marble’s edge against the gem.
When her aching wrist finally lifted the slab again, its tip suddenly shimmered with a calm, watery light.
At last!
A sharp “crack” echoed as the center of the red jewel split open.
Feeling an inexplicable thrill, Pay brought the marble down again and again upon the ruby.
It was both the beginning and the end.
Thud. Thud. Thud.
Her ragged breathing and the sound of stone crushing gemstone filled the room. The ruby at the pendant’s center, battered by her furious strikes, shattered into pitiful fragments.
For the first time, she realized she was capable of such cruelty.
“Hah… hah… haaah…”
The ruby pendant that had once held the complete secret of Tiana Marietta Klein’s birth was utterly destroyed.
It feels wonderful.
Pay trembled with an overwhelming sense of liberation, as though she had thrown herself beneath a cascading waterfall.
“Whew…”
Now that she had vented her anger, it was time to clean up. She paid no mind to her reddened hands.
If Priestess Cheryl asks about the pendant, I’ll say I put it away somewhere.
Even when they first found her, Mother Superior Beryl and her daughter had recognized the pendant’s value. They had only given it to Pay, along with the silk robe, once she was old enough.
Unlike the pendant, the silk robe had been too small for her even as a child, so she had never carried it with her.
“I should clean up the stone dust first.”
After putting away the marble slab and tucking the broken ruby pendant into her bag, Pay lay down on the bed.
Once the aching, stifling weight in her chest eased, drowsiness crept over her.
“…I don’t want to go back.”
She no longer wished to look upon the grueling life of an Eina or the glorious position of the Klein daughter.
But in a few hours, Priestess Cheryl would come to fetch her, saying the carriage had arrived to return to the monastery.
No. No. No. Please don’t come.
If that was impossible, then at least keep the Duke from summoning her to the Klein estate. Let someone stop him until he arrives at the empty monastery and takes Dot instead.
Please, stop him!
Tears of sorrow slipped from the corners of Pay’s closed eyes.
Those tears shone more brilliantly than the ruby that had just shattered, and soon they began to whisper countless voices.
“…Dear, the time has come…”
“She broke it herself… How remarkable…”
“Her… will… is important…”
“…grant what she… desires… first…”
What is this?
Startled by the hallucination flooding her ears, Pay’s eyes flew open just as a low rumble sounded outside the window. A tremendous downpour began to fall.
What she had thought was merely a shower showed no sign of stopping even after ten full minutes. It turned into a thunderstorm, hurling sheets of rain.
What’s happening?
In the past, there had been no rain at all. And what were those strange whispers she had heard?
Pay strained her ears in tense silence, but the unfamiliar whispers did not return.
Then—
“Pay! Are you all right?”
“Yes…?”
The deceased Priestess Cheryl burst through the door and pulled Pay into a tight embrace.
“Thank goodness you didn’t go outside. The rain came down so suddenly that I was worried. The carriage has probably given up on departing, so we’ll have to stay here another day.”
“Another day?”
“At this rate, even if the rain stops, the roads will turn to mud and the wheels will get stuck.”
“Oh…”
“We’ve safely stored the fruit, so there’s no need to go outside. Staying indoors is the safest option.”
Watching Cheryl act so kindly, Pay felt her throat tighten.
Priestess Cheryl… Please don’t die this time.
Although Mother Superior Beryl was strict, her daughter Cheryl had always been merciful to the children.
Yet she had never quite warmed to Pay’s friend Dot.
Was that also born of insight?
“It must be raining because it’s summer.”
“Indeed. Hehe, shall we share one of the clusters of green grapes you worked so hard to pick?”
If this had been the old Pay, she would have refused.
She had always behaved demurely, just as the strict Mother Superior Beryl had taught her, and never showed greed for food.
In the past, she had surrendered every strawberry and green grape she picked with roughened hands and eaten only sour pickled vegetables.
She had lived foolishly, believing that was morality and righteousness. She had tried to be the good girl who gave away all the delicious food.
But this time would be different. She would cherish even this brief moment of memory.
“Yes. I’d like to eat them with you, Priestess.”
“Very well. I’ll bring the largest cluster.”
The green grapes she shared with Cheryl tasted wonderfully sweet. With every bite, the tears she had shed earlier seemed to dry, and her heart felt lighter.
Yet the sharp-eyed Cheryl noticed the change even in that short time.
“Pay, did you take off your necklace?”
“Yes…? Yes.”
“I see. Well, with the rain, it wouldn’t do for water to get into the gem.”
Gathering her courage, Pay asked, “Um, Priestess… Is it bad to wear a pendant with a gemstone around your neck all the time?”
“Gems don’t react well to sweat or water. When we first found you, your silk robe was covered in dirt, but the pendant alone was strangely clean. My mother and I were both surprised.”
“Only the pendant?”
“Usually, gems are easily damaged by rough handling.”
Pay was deeply confused by the unexpected story.
She had never asked about this before she died.
“The mage who brought you to us after you were injured and gave you your name said we shouldn’t hand over those tokens too soon. He told us to wait until you were older and then give them to you separately.”
“There was a mage who gave me my name?!”
Cheryl looked taken aback.
“Did the Mother Superior not mention it when she gave you the pendant?”
“No.”
“Ah, I see. Well, she does dislike magic and mages, so it makes sense. I should have looked after you more carefully, but I was too busy and careless. I should have at least asked you about it later.”
Careless? No, Priestess Cheryl, you were the one who looked after me the most. I just didn’t realize it. I was such a fool.
Even as she ate the sweet, refreshing grapes, Pay felt her throat tighten again with unshed tears.