05. The Human Causing a Stir
05. The Human Causing a Stir
"Doll-fucker, that's too much. Bari's a full-fledged person, you know."
"Hmm. We don't even know if manufactured beings truly have personalities or not, and even if they do, that doesn't change their fundamental nature as dolls. Doing that with a doll... what the hell is wrong with you..."
She was looking at me like I was utterly filthy, and it kinda hurt.
"You have no idea. Bari's so soft. Way softer than you, all trembly and shit."
"Don't make me laugh. I saw weird metal chunks popping out from inside her body with my own eyes. You think bullshit like that will fly?"
"It's true. Feel it yourself."
I held out Bari's arm to her.
Yu Ina wrinkled her nose slightly and poked at Bari's arm.
Normally, Bari would've smacked away such an unpleasant gesture, but luckily, since I was leading this, she held back.
"Soft, right?"
"...Hmph. Doesn't change anything. The inside's still gonna be hard as rock."
"Nah, humans are hard inside too. You've got bones, don't you?"
"Why do you keep saying weird shit? That doesn't change the fact that it's still a doll at its core. No matter how sophisticated, a doll's a doll, a golem's a golem. You're just a freak with weird fetishes. Now I get why you resisted the elf's temptation... ugh... falling for this crap without even knowing...!"
She's seriously misunderstanding big time.
"That was me desperately holding back, for real. I'm a normal guy."
"Hmm."
She didn't believe me at all.
"Anyway, could you back off a bit? You're scary."
Why the hell am I scary?
"Being near you makes me feel like I'll turn into a doll or something."
"What's that supposed to mean? That's some paranoid delusion."
My image of this girl was crumbling bit by bit.
It was already shattered, but there was still a tiny last bastion left...
Talking to her more feels like it'll make me weird too.
"Whatever, first things first—we need to secure a spot for the Factory."
"So you're planning to build it on the surface after all?"
"Yeah. We're married now, so the Chief Instructor won't make a big fuss."
"...We'll see about that."
"If push comes to shove, we can use our house."
"Wait... something's off with the flow here. By 'our house,' you don't mean my house, do you?"
Yu Ina jumped in, catching it like a ghost.
"Come on, no need to be so stingy between husband and wife. Your house is my house, your mansion is my mansion."
"What? That's 'my' house!"
"Yeah. And it's my house too. I rebuilt it, remember? Lived there for over a week."
"Technically, your doll did it. And I could do that anytime too. Staying a week was because of the bet."
"So we're gonna live separately right after getting married? Separate beds on day one— that's fresh."
"..."
She bit her lip, unable to say anything.
"And don't worry too much. We're getting the land from the Chief Instructor anyway."
"......Broke as you are, how are you so confident? And the Chief Instructor-nim doesn't own the Academy. It's run by the Ha Family, and she's just the manager assigned there."
"Doesn't matter. We're family either way."
"......I just can't understand your way of thinking at all."
"You don't need to."
"...Haa."
She let out a deep sigh.
"But wait, why's your house here anyway? This is Academy grounds."
Yu Ina's house was right in front of the building with her office—specifically, the management building where all the instructors' offices are clustered.
In other words, inside the Academy.
The mansion alone was huge, with a decent yard attached, and if you count the whole plot, it's bigger than the Underground Base before expansion.
Why the hell is something like that inside the Academy?
"For about 300 years, our family has been producing one instructor per generation. It's like a rite of passage. After the coming-of-age ceremony, they serve as instructors for around 50 years. That's the house used back then. Now it's mine."
"Oh. So the house is 300 years old?"
"Something like that, but it's always been properly maintained, so no worries about it collapsing."
Makes sense. In a place where they can restore it like new easily, no such concerns.
But...
"That's not the point. The age is the key. Looks like instead of getting land from the Chief Instructor, we should've been renovating the house."
"What?"
"Listen. You saw it yourself. The buildings here, the furniture— all top quality, right? You admit that?"
"That has nothing to do with this. The mansion's mine, and I have zero intention of handing it over to you."
"Come on, think about it. You need to break free from money worries too."
"...What random bullshit is this now."
"You gonna leave Luna like that? Toss her to the beastmen?"
"What does that have to do with you remodeling my house willy-nilly?"
"It was your house originally, so we'll remodel it into a Factory, and I'll kick back a cut of the profits to you. Then you can buy Luna soon enough."
We're married anyway, so her money's my money.
"Pie in the sky. No guarantee people will buy what you make."
"Tsk tsk tsk. You still don't get Bari's value."
Whatever. No point explaining more; she'll never buy it. Gotta just show her. Make something, sell it, and her mind'll change.
"Then at least lend me the yard. I'll build there."
"..."
She still looked displeased, but maybe because we're married now, she barely nodded.
"So, what are you planning to make?"
"Cigarettes first. Top-shelf stuff."
"...Pardon?"
"Since it came up, make one carton. Filterless."
"Making without equipment will consume Nanomaterials."
"It's fine. We can mass-produce now anyway."
"..."
Bari silently stared at me, then raised her hand and produced a long box.
One carton of filterless cigarettes.
A carton has 10 packs, each pack 20 sticks, total 200 smokes.
"Gonna gift it to the Chief Instructor?"
"Yeah. She didn't officiate, but she notarized the marriage contract, right? Can't pay her, but a gift's the least."
Bonus if it spreads the word.
+++
"Outsiders are prohibited from entering."
"But... I have business with Yu Ina-ssi...?"
"Which means, unless you're family, outsiders can't enter."
Jin Seong-hyeon, who had come all the way down to the 1st floor spending good money to meet Yu Ina, hit a massive wall.
Any other being would've name-dropped Noblesse to push through, but the opponent was Noblesse too. And a woman at that.
Having a precious Noblesse talent guarding the entrance felt surreal.
"Not family, but a close acquaintance! I'll just see her face and leave!"
"Hmm, no can do."
She waved her hand dismissively, like it was a hassle.
But backing down here wasn't an option.
He had to meet Yu Ina somehow and get the full story on the marriage to sleep easy.
"If you're that desperate, just enroll."
After a solid ten-plus minutes of back-and-forth, she finally offered one solution.
"Enroll...?"
Unlike other academies, this place used 'Academy' like a proper noun—the very first one established in the Tower.
Rich in history and tradition, with top-tier instructors, the entry bar was sky-high.
No wonder hundreds died every quarter.
As Noblesse, he probably wouldn't die, but he still swallowed hard.
"Phew... you're male, but... as Noblesse, you qualify plenty. If you wanna meet her that bad, enrolling's an option."
Truth is, Noblesse rarely entered the Academy.
They usually got family education or joined famous guild families like the Yu Family—no need for the hassle.
If anything, they'd come as instructors or assistants for the experience.
But men were different.
Their Nobling concentration was way lower than women's, so unless magic experts, elite paths were tough.
Most went non-combat like infusing currency with Nobling, or rarely combat via Academy.
"If I enroll, can I meet Yu Ina?"
"You'd need to consult the Chief Instructor-nim first. This quarter's recruitment is over, so her permission's required for entry."
"...Got it. Then I'll enroll—please guide me."
"......You're really enrolling?"
She eyed him suspiciously, sighing.
Enrolling just to see one person?
What the fuck is this idiot?
Pretty much that look.
"Guide me already."
"I'm on duty here today, so I can't."
"What the—!"
"I'll assign someone else."
With that, she called over an off-duty instructor.
An elf woman.
"You called, Instructor Juyeon-nim?"
"This guy's enrolling. Take him to the Chief Instructor-nim."
"......Enrolling...?"
"Yes."
The Elf Instructor tilted her head at Seong-hyeon, then turned.
"Follow me."
+++
"Whew..."
The smoke from Yu Ina's exhale drifted away in a hazy cloud.
She walked leisurely, taking a bold drag.
No one stopped her.
Each puff brought a satisfied smile as she brought the filterless cig back to her lips from between her fingers.
What a chain-smoker.
"...Good stuff. Don't like you much, but this? Pretty damn good."
"So, think it'll sell?"
"Hmm... Chief Instructor-nim will love it, at least. Unlike me, she's a heavy smoker."
"Nice. Sell it in the city, you think it'll move?"
"Depends on marketing. For starters... yeah, dump bulk to the family."
"Sweet."
It's working.
"So, build a workshop in the yard to produce these?"
"For now."
"But earlier, the doll whipped it out of thin air. What's the workshop for then?"
"That's a stopgap. Wastes tons of premium resources. Need a proper Factory line for cost-efficiency."
"Hmm... okay, I get the gist."
She nodded.
"Alright. 30 percent."
"What?"
"I take 30% of the profits you make."
"What? That's straight-up robbery."
"What nonsense? You think lending land's easy?"
"Still, not 30%."
What kind of business ethics is this?
"Lending you the yard means I lose my garden. That view doesn't just soothe the mind—it stabilizes my body and soul, boosting productivity. You see little visible loss, but invisibly, I'm taking a huge hit. So, 30%."
"Get real."
Like I'd buy that crap.
Max 15%. And that's generous.
"Then—,"
"Yu Ina!!!"
That's when it happened.
Some guy's shout rang out.
"Hm?"
Me, her, and Bari turned toward the source—there was a guy walking with some elf girl.
Spotting us, he lit up, shook off the elf girl's restraint, and came running.
"Yu Ina!!"
Who the hell's this punk.
Knows Yu Ina?
Right before he arrived, I stepped in front of her.
"Who the hell are you, calling my wife by her name so casually?"