Shouchun Great Battle (2)
"No, if you've scarfed down our grain provisions, the least you could do is pretend to send some troops! Why the hell are you trying to marry off Lü Bu's daughter—who doesn't even match your status—as your crown princess? Why dump massive gold and treasures on a lowlife like Lü Bu? And why, after we gifted you all that grain?!"
Was Pang Tong too immersed in this mock battle, or had her head finally exploded from Yuan Shu's nonstop harassments from every direction?
"I was trying to link up with Lü Bu to crush Cao Cao!"
Pang Tong had somehow become the true advisor to Yuan Shu's army. She seemed pissed off at getting outmaneuvered at every turn.
But what could anyone do? "That's just how Lü Bu is."
"Doesn't Lü Bu have any conscience?!"
"If Lü Bu had a conscience, he wouldn't have killed his foster father for a single Red Hare and then cozied up to a new one."
Lü Bu lacked so many things, but above all, he had no conscience, no righteousness, no morals, no principles.
"You gifted him grain? Gag."
"You little...!"
"Well, he ate it, so he must have some conscience—he won't attack Yuan Shu's forces."
"You just said he has none!"
"You can't judge Lü Bu's conscience by normal human standards."
All of Lü Bu's actions could be defined simply by the name "Lü Bu."
He got bewitched by a woman despite having a wife and chopped off Dong Zhuo's head? That's "Lü Bu being Lü Bu." He stood with Yuan Shu's army, got a gift meant as a reminder of alliance duties, and just pocketed it without a word? "Lü Bu being Lü Bu."
"Count yourself lucky that Lü Bu's army isn't siding with Cao Cao's forces or Yuan Shu's—just sitting it out!"
"You're acting just like Lü Bu yourself."
"Teacher, you seem obsessed with Lü Bu too."
"Hahaha! Who knew it'd be this delightful that the world's greatest general only thinks of himself!"
Strategies? Tactics? Diplomacy?
All useless in the face of a powerhouse like Lü Bu. If Lü Bu wanted it, he took it—that was all there was to it.
"Ugh, Cao Gong! You hate Lü Bu too, don't you? You'll attack him after I die!"
"Right now, subduing the Han traitor takes priority, no?"
"Aaaargh!!"
Pang Tong clawed at her hair in frustration at Sima Yi's words.
"Sun Bo! I recognize you as a feudal lord! Be my vanguard and fight for me! Yes! I'll marry my son to your sister! Er, if you don't have a sister, any woman will do!"
"How could one born of tiger blood bow to a cur's spawn?"
"Grr...!!"
Pang Tong started gnawing on her own hand at Seo Seo's retort.
"Listen, Hyun-deok. We shared bonds in the anti-Dong Zhuo coalition, didn't we? So you—"
"Traitorous bastard."
Zhuge Liang just twisted her lips in a sneer.
"Rebel who mocked the Han imperial house. My strength may be meager, but I'll see you sent to join Dong Zhuo for sure."
"You're the one who makes zero sense here."
Pang Tong flopped down on the spot.
"So this is what it feels like to be surrounded on all sides."
"Yuan Shu isn't Xiang Yu."
"...Teacher, I hate you the most."
"I never even accepted you into the academy."
"You bully people like this and say that?!"
"Bully? I'm just stating the facts. Everyone knows the answer. Yuan Shu is..."
"Doomed."
Yuan Shu's downfall was a foregone conclusion. That was the true answer in this mock Battle of Shouchun.
"For Yuan Shu, at best he'll crumble in Shouchun and flee elsewhere. At worst, his head gets chopped off and hung in Heodo."
"No matter how much pride you puff up to try beating us, no one will side with Yuan Shu."
"Ugh, Sima Yi. You're starting to piss me off too."
Sima Yi just quietly shrugged.
"...Hmph, but will the other lords actually move? Cao Cao's probably plastered edicts everywhere using the Emperor as a front. Yuan Shao, Gongsun Zan, Ma Teng of the Western Liang, Han Sui, Zhang Lu, Liu Biao, Zhang Su, Liu Bei, Lü Bu, Sun Bo...! She's given all those feudal lords a simple choice: Han or Zhong."
"Of course they'll pick Han. Even Lü Bu chose Han."
"But they won't send troops. Just like Liu Biao."
"......."
No words left. Liu Biao was closest to Yuan Shu's territory, yet despite responding to the edict, he just locked his gates tight.
"Cao Cao stepping up as Grand General? Fine, we acknowledge it. But who wants to fight under her? Anyone besides us here?"
"......."
No one dared answer lightly.
"You think we'll just sit here and take it? Dream on—forced conscription!"
Pang Tong pulled out her final card.
"I'll put every able-bodied man in Shouchun who can hold a weapon atop the walls. That's three hundred thousand!"
"...Suddenly jumping to a hundred thousand is too much."
"Hmph, Shouchun's population is huge!"
"A hundred thousand's too many—let's say fifty thousand." Come to find out later, Yuan Shu's desperate conscription did somehow hit three hundred thousand.
Most of them died, though.
"So who actually responded to the edict?"
Quietly, Zhuge Liang raised her hand.
"Liu Bei's army will join General Cao."
"Ha, the guy who got wrecked in Xuzhou, flat broke and holing up in Xiaopei—what makes him so great?"
"Our army has..."
Zhuge Liang sneered at Pang Tong, twisting her lips.
"Guan Yu and Zhang Fei, who stand twin walls against Lü Bu."
* * *
"Doesn't it feel too much?"
Cao Cao let out a hollow laugh in exasperation.
"We're marching down with a hundred thousand troops toward Shouchun, and not a peep about any other lords mobilizing to join us."
"The messengers must be delayed."
"We set out last—how's that possible? Lü Bu aside, Sun Bo declared independence but he's just mustering troops to fortify his own turf, not heading to Shouchun."
Cao Cao was fuming.
"How! Not one person shows up?!"
Anti-Yuan Shu coalition. So different from the eighteen lords who once rose against Dong Zhuo—Cao Cao felt a surge of resentment.
"Back when Dong Zhuo torched Luoyang and I chased him alone, it wasn't this bad. How can this be?"
"My lord, surely—"
"Scout! Enemy forces ahead—several thousand waiting! Estimated at around five thousand!"
"...Ha, five thousand. Thrilling."
Cao Cao rose with a mix of exhaustion and relief on her face.
"Alright, whose banners?"
"Liu banners."
"...Liu Biao? That Liu Jing-sheng sending a measly five thousand just to save face?!"
"...It's Liu Bei."
For a moment, Cao Cao froze.
"Who?"
"Liu Hyun-deok."
"...Five thousand from Liu Bei is basically his full force, isn't it?"
Cao Cao hoped Liu Bei would bring his entire army to join hers. She mulled over the name "Liu Bei" several times, lost in thought.
"Liu Bei, Liu Bei..."
"My lord, is there a reason you're hesitating...?"
"We'll rest here one day! Cao Hong! Set up camp. Xun You, Guo Jia, Jeong Uk! You three, come to my tent first!"
Under Cao Cao's orders, the troops swiftly built a temporary camp for rest. She quietly summoned the three into the command tent her subordinates had pitched.
"Kill Liu Bei, or let him live?"
The advisors' faces turned grave at Cao Cao's words.
"As you all know, the current Emperor has a massive weakness. One slip, and someone else could become Emperor."
"I understand perfectly, my lord. You're worried Liu Bei might leverage his imperial blood to claim royal privileges?"
"That's not all. Suppose something happens to the Emperor—what would Liu Bei do next?"
"...He'd raise his hand first to claim the thickest imperial bloodline. He's undeniably a descendant."
He called himself a descendant of Prince of Zhongshan, so Cao Cao had investigated. And it checked out.
Of all people, Liu Bei was an imperial scion—and to the young Emperor, practically an uncle.
The so-called Liu Imperial Uncle—the Emperor's uncle.
If that happened, and disaster struck the Emperor later, the Imperial Seal would naturally go to...
"Liu Bei could become Emperor."
"Mm."
The current Emperor was very young. But Liu Bei was just two years younger than Cao Cao herself, with a track record of building and leading his own forces.
His power might be small, but wherever he went, the people called him a "good man"—how terrifying was that?
"Xun You, your thoughts?"
"Kill Liu Bei to eliminate future trouble. The fewer with imperial blood, the better. Leave only the Emperor's direct line and purge the rest. Since he's here, execute him at the right moment."
"Guo Jia, you?"
"No reason to kill. Why bother? Especially since he came to crush Yuan Shu. Killing him now means no one joins us."
"...Jeong Uk, you?"
"Not now—later. Use him hard in the decisive battle against Yuan Shu, squeeze out every drop of value, then invite him to Heodo and handle him when the chance arises."
The three advisors gave differing opinions. Cao Cao closed her eyes, leaning back in her chair, then spoke softly.
"I need time to think. Leave us."
"Yes."
The three exited the tent. Waiting generals rushed up to the advisors.
"What's the decision? Killing Liu Bei?"
"She's deeply conflicted. We'll call for you when it's made—Cao Hong, wait up front."
"You must have some idea?"
"We don't know her true intentions."
Xun You shook her head calmly.
"We just gave her options to weigh."
"Which are?"
"Spare Liu Bei. Kill him. Use him now and kill later."
"...Whew, tough."
Cao Hong sighed heavily.
"I just don't wanna fight Liu Bei's army right now."
"Why, General?"
"Fighting Yuan Shu's already brutal—adding Liu Bei's would be hell."
"Just five thousand?"
"Oh, Advisor, don't even. Liu Bei brought Guan Yu and Zhang Fei as his wings."
Cao Hong shook his head in horror.
"Facing a smart Lü Bu and a conscientious Lü Bu at once? We'd lose at least ten thousand minimum."
"That's exaggerated."
"No joke! They're real monsters. Even if five thousand die, those two could rescue Liu Bei, break through a hundred thousand, and escape."
"...Surely not that bad. Chain them from afar, lasso and tie 'em up?"
"This ain't tiger hunting. ...Actually, yeah, that's how you'd catch 'em. After losing dozens, hundreds."
"General Cao Hong, you—"
"Heo Jeo might handle it, but I'd lose my head in thirty exchanges. One alone I'd maybe face, but both? No thanks."
Cao Hong continued, pale-faced.
"If Lü Bu's the strongest in the world, after he dies, those two will vie for the top spot."
"...How'd such guys end up as Liu Bei's sworn brothers? What kind of man is he to keep two Lü Bus wandering for over ten years and still have their loyalty?"
"Exactly."
Cao Hong jerked his chin at the tent.
"That's why she's plotting to kill Liu Bei."
"Hey."
Cao Cao emerged from the tent.
"......I'll go meet Lord Liu Bei."
Her face looked like she'd chewed raw ginger to the end.
* * *
"Good thing Liu Bei's army showed up."
"...You won't die?"
"Liang, why? Cao Cao has no reason to kill Liu Bei right now."
"If she's gonna, better now."
"We can kill Liu Bei anytime. Even if he hides in some corner of Yizhou, we'll hunt him down. Priority's hitting Yuan Shu. Crossing the huge mountain in front matters more than some potential threat."
Sima Yi reached out to Zhuge Liang.
"I'll give Guan Yu and Zhang Fei ten thousand each. How about it—want to smash Yuan Shu's vanguard?"
"Teacher! This means Yuan Shu wins, right?! Right?!"
"Mm."
I grabbed Pang Tong's hand, the one that had dramatically pulled out overwhelming troops beyond the gates.
"Knock down four banners. Your forty thousand army's now dead."
"...Huh?"
"One thing I know for sure."
Two controlled Lü Bus, each leading ten thousand?
"That's two Lü Bus."
What kind of monster was this Liu Bei, dragging around two Lü Bus as little brothers?