I Picked Up an Ownerless Axe
The fourth month of Zhongping 5th year (188 AD). Training grounds of the Taishan General’s Headquarters.
“Pikes forward! Shields up straight! Advance one step!”
“Hold those fucking pikes straight! Stop looking around!!”
“You wanna die when the cavalry charges?! Stop slacking off!!”
The Black Mountain Army soldiers were drenched in sweat, steam rising from their bodies as they repeated the same spear drills over and over. The forces I would soon face as enemies possessed overwhelming cavalry power. If it were up to me, I’d love to expand my own cavalry, but the cost of maintaining them was beyond imagination. So the answer was the pike square.
Even a cavalry charge that shook the earth could be broken if met with a proper pike formation. That was why I was currently screaming myself hoarse, drilling them without mercy.
“Haa… fuck, my throat’s gonna give out at this rate.”
I sat on a wooden platform atop a hill overlooking the training field and grumbled to myself. The weather had finally warmed enough for serious training, but compared to when these guys were still just bandits, the change was so ridiculous it made me want to laugh.
“My lord.”
Yu Byeok approached quietly and spoke.
“There’s a strange rumor coming out of Jinliu Commandery.”
I narrowed my eyes. “What is it this time? Another rebel army or Yellow Turban remnants?”
“No, my lord. An incident occurred in Jinliu. There is a man named Jeon Wi…”
“Jeon Wi?”
The moment I heard that name, my body froze for a split second. Where have I heard that name before?
Yu Byeok nodded. “Two powerful clans in Jinliu were mortal enemies. This man named Jeon Wi apparently received a great favor from one of them. To repay that debt, he slaughtered every single member of the rival clan—including their entire families.”
“…”
“After that, hundreds of survivors chased him for revenge, but he crossed a river with a few comrades, broke through the encirclement, and escaped alive. Because of this, his fame as a hero spread far and wide.”
My mouth moved on reflex. “Isn’t that guy just fucking crazy?”
“Pardon?”
“I mean, repaying a favor by wiping out an entire family? Is that normal?”
Yu Byeok trailed off awkwardly. “…That’s why I wasn’t sure whether to report it to you, General…”
I let out a dry laugh and asked, “Hey, what did you say that bastard’s name was again?”
“Jeon Wi, my lord.”
My eyes widened and I shot to my feet. “Ah, fuck! Well then—he’s a guy who actually understands the way of the gentleman.”
“……My lord?”
Yu Byeok stared at me blankly for a moment before asking with a serious expression, “Are you… feeling alright lately?”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
I stretched my arms and said, “Yu Byeok, you take over training from today.”
“What? My lord?”
“I’m going to Jinliu for a bit.”
“……Yes?”
I was already walking out of the training grounds, calling for the waiting cavalry. “Hey! Ten of you, follow me! We’re heading to Jinliu right now!”
Hearing that, Yu Byeok muttered in disbelief, “…My lord… what on earth has gotten into you lately?”
Southeast of Jinliu. A valley in a remote mountain.
Before the sun had fully climbed overhead. In a quiet mountain valley where even the wild beasts stayed silent, the sound of hooves echoed as several riders cautiously emerged.
“Hey, isn’t that the place?”
I dismounted and pointed across the valley. A group using the terrain and trees as cover, with a single tent pitched. Roughly five or six men. And in the center, a man sitting with his broad back exposed.
—It was obviously Jeon Wi.
“You guys, wait back there.”
The cavalrymen nodded and stopped. I strode forward boldly.
That was when one of the men sleeping beside the tent jumped up and shouted, “Hey! There’s someone here!”
All of them rose to their feet. The man in the center slowly turned his head. A muscular body covered in rugged scars. The handle of his axe was wrapped in blood-stained cloth, and his eyes gleamed sharper than any beast’s. Any ordinary person would have pissed themselves on the spot, but I walked right up to him and smiled.
“So this is where you’ve been hiding? You’re Jeon Wi, right?”
Jeon Wi didn’t answer. He simply stared straight into my eyes and slowly stood up. His hand rested on the axe hanging at his waist.
The cavalry behind me tensed up as well. Their hands went to their sword hilts, ready to charge at any moment.
“Who… are you?” Jeon Wi asked in a low voice.
I grinned. “Me? I’m Jang Yeon, General Who Establishes Righteousness of Taishan.”
Jeon Wi’s eyes flickered slightly. “Jang Yeon…? The Black Mountain bandit?”
At those words, one of the cavalrymen behind me immediately drew his sword. “This bastard dares insult our lord—”
“Hey!” I shouted without even turning my head. “Did I tell you to draw your sword? Sheathe it, you son of a bitch! Now!”
The cavalryman hurriedly put his blade away. I looked back at Jeon Wi.
“That’s right. I used to be a Black Mountain bandit.”
Jeon Wi narrowed his eyes. “So you’re saying you’re no longer a bandit.”
I chuckled. “Hah, you really don’t mince words. Yeah, I’m not a bandit anymore.”
Jeon Wi took one step forward, but his hand still gripped the axe handle tightly. “If you’re not a bandit, then what are you?”
“I’m a general of the imperial court.”
“Hah. A bandit calling himself a general. How amusing.” Jeon Wi snorted.
I rubbed my chin. “Yeah, it’s funny, right? But you know what’s even funnier?”
I stepped so close our noses almost touched and stared him dead in the eyes.
“The guy saying that funny shit… came all the way here in person to recruit you.”
Jeon Wi frowned. I continued, “You’re pretty funny too, aren’t you? Repaying a favor by slaughtering an entire clan? Fuck, is that really repaying a debt? Or is it just murder?”
“…It was repaying a debt.”
“Aigo, you dumbass. I’ve never seen a proper man who talks about repaying favors or righteousness after massacring an entire family.”
I licked my dry lips and kept going. “Look, I was originally a bandit too. But I never killed innocent people or pillaged for fun. Sure, I stole money and goods, so I won’t lie about that. But what about you?”
Jeon Wi kept his mouth shut tight. I didn’t stop there.
“I stole because I was starving. You, on the other hand, slaughtered an entire family—including the children—just to repay a favor! If I’m a bandit, then what the fuck are you? Some righteous murderer?”
Jeon Wi’s eyes sharpened like blades. “At least… I repaid the debt I owed. I’m different from you!”
“Sure, sure. So this great guy who repaid his debt is now hiding like a rat in this shitty valley with a few friends.”
I tilted my head and scoffed. “Hey, I’m genuinely curious. Between a guy like me—who went from banditry to becoming a general, governing a county, and commanding tens of thousands—and you, who repaid a favor by killing an entire family and now lives like an animal in the mountains, who looks more human?”
Jeon Wi ground his teeth and glared at me, apparently at a loss for words.
“Doesn’t it make you think, ‘Why the fuck does a bandit live better than me? Why am I in this state?’ Isn’t this world just completely fucked?”
I laughed and tapped my temple with a finger. “Use your head before you act. Duty? Gratitude? You have to apply those things according to the situation. If you suddenly say ‘I received a favor so I killed them all,’ sure, people might call you a hero. But even if they praise you, isn’t it pathetic to spend the rest of your life running and hiding?”
At that moment, Jeon Wi’s eyebrows twisted. He gripped the axe handle so hard it looked like it might snap. Veins bulged on his thick forearms.
“…If you don’t shut that mouth right now—”
Jeon Wi growled as he half-drew his axe. The cavalry behind me fumbled for their sword hilts in panic. The tension was so thick it felt like it could explode at any second.
But I just laughed even harder, my mouth refusing to stop.
“Whoa, whoa, getting all worked up? Young master Jeon Wi, your temper’s still alive and kicking, huh~?”
I smirked and brushed off my pants with my palm. “The way you’re gripping that axe, it looks like I hit a nerve.”
Jeon Wi’s glare became sharper than any blade, but I kept mocking him casually.
“Hey, if you were a real bold murderer, you would’ve already chopped my head off with that axe. But you didn’t, did you? So you’re not a murderer after all. Yet here you are, trembling while gripping your axe so tight. Did my words really sting that much?”
I jerked my chin. “I came all the way from Taishan to Jinliu because I was genuinely curious. What are you going to do from now on? Keep running for the rest of your life with that axe? Or are you going to make a real name for yourself in this fucked-up world?”
Jeon Wi breathed heavily. The axe handle was still in his hand, but his body was trembling slightly.
I whispered into his ear, “If you’re just going to waste your time like this, come under me. I’ll use you properly.”
Jeon Wi remained silent. But the strength slowly drained from the hand gripping the axe, and the half-drawn weapon slid back into place.
His eyes still held suspicion and wariness as he stared at me, but that only made me more certain.
I just picked up a fucking ownerless axe!
Jeon Wi finally spoke quietly. “…I have conditions.”
I grinned. “Of course. Now we’re actually talking. Go ahead. I’ll accommodate as much as I can, my dear murderous young master.”
Jeon Wi spoke through clenched teeth. “My people… the ones with me right now. You must accept all of them too. If not for them, I wouldn’t have been able to escape.”
I nodded. “Hey, that’s fucking obvious. Did you think I’d only take you?”
Jeon Wi frowned. “And… that’s not all.”
“Oh? What else? You want my head too?”
Jeon Wi spoke in a low voice. “This is the first time I’ve ever submitted to anyone. So at the very least, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t treat me like a disposable tool.”
I stopped laughing for a moment and looked at him with serious eyes.
“Jeon Wi. I’m not the kind of bastard who uses people just to satisfy my own desires. I stand at the front with a sword in my hand, and my subordinates bleed just like I do. If you follow me, I promise your axe swings won’t be in vain—”
I smiled and continued, “And you won’t have to rot away in a shitty valley like this anymore. Fuck, if a man is born with balls, shouldn’t he at least stand before the Emperor with a blade in his hand once in his life?”
Jeon Wi stayed silent at my words. Then he lowered his head before slowly raising it again.
“…Very well. Jang Yeon. I will follow you.”
I smiled brightly. “Good. From today onward, you are Jeon Wi of the Black Mountain Army of Taishan. And hey, from now on, let’s use proper respectful speech. It helps me maintain my dignity, doesn’t it?”
“…I will keep that in mind. My lord.”
The cavalrymen behind us murmured quietly, and Jeon Wi’s comrades stared at him in shock. I gave his shoulder a light pat.
“Oh, and remember one more thing. Now that you’re under me, I decide where your axe points.”
Jeon Wi nodded at my words.
End of the fourth month, Zhongping 5th year (188 AD). Grand General’s Office, Luoyang.
“I am offering sincere remonstration as His Majesty’s loyal subject… yet why does His Majesty refuse to understand my heart!”
Grand General Ha Jin slammed his fist on the table, unable to contain his rage. Wine cups rattled, ink stones shook, and black ink spilled everywhere.
Before him stood Army Commanders Won So and Jo Jo side by side.
Ha Jin let out a deep sigh. “Geon-seok… Jang Yang… those bastards are treating me like a puppet. They created the Eight Regiments and are summoning generals into the palace… Am I truly the Grand General of Han?”
Jo Jo quietly stepped forward. “Grand General. His Majesty… no longer wishes to entrust you with full authority.”
Ha Jin’s eyebrows twitched. “What did you say?”
“The Ten Eunuchs… are covering His Majesty’s eyes and ears.”
At Jo Jo’s words, Won So nodded and continued. “At first glance, the Eight Regiments appear unrelated to the eunuchs, but the Ten Eunuchs’ leader Geon-seok holds supreme command as the Upper Army Commander. Moreover, His Majesty, swayed by the eunuchs’ schemes, is heavily favoring them. Even if the soldiers of Han wish to follow the Grand General, they cannot.”
Ha Jin ground his teeth and stood up. “Then what am I supposed to do?”
Jo Jo answered with an expressionless face. “That is precisely why we are here.”
Won So added, “Grand General. This is the moment when decisive action is needed more than ever. Simple checks will no longer work. The roots of the eunuchs run too deep. Unless we cut off their hands, the court will never stand upright.”
Ha Jin collapsed back into his seat. He covered his face with both hands and groaned. “Those Ten Eunuchs… haa. The Empress still protects them and tells me to get along with them.”
He lowered his head and muttered bitterly. “She tells me to speak kindly to the eunuchs… She shields them at every turn. What can I possibly accomplish in this country?”
A brief silence fell after Ha Jin’s words. Jo Jo was the one who broke it.
“Grand General. Her Majesty the Empress… simply wishes to bring peace to the court. However—that peace is merely the calm right before the pus bursts open.”
Ha Jin looked up. Jo Jo took another step forward and spoke clearly.
“If the Grand General steps back now, the Ten Eunuchs will seize His Majesty and brand you a traitor.”
Won So chimed in as well. “We cannot know Her Majesty’s true intentions, but the Ten Eunuchs are blinding His Majesty’s eyes and ears, mocking imperial authority. Their arrogance has lasted far too long, and many have already fallen for their schemes.”
Ha Jin clenched his fists in silence. Jo Jo continued in a low, firm voice.
“There are only two paths to remonstrate with His Majesty. Either offer endless sincere advice as a loyal subject—or seize the opportunity to cut off the hands that blind his eyes and ears.”
Ha Jin’s eyes flashed. “…Are you telling me to kill the Ten Eunuchs?”
Jo Jo didn’t even blink. “Otherwise, the Grand General will eventually be labeled a traitor and executed.”
Ha Jin quietly rose from his seat. His eyes flickered with hesitation, rage, and an unquenchable ambition all at once.
“I swore as an imperial relative by marriage that I would correct this court… and yet, in the end, there is no other way.”
Won So delivered the final blow. “If the Ten Eunuchs are not purged, Han will become a nation that endlessly bleeds.”
Ha Jin closed his eyes. After a long time, he opened them again and murmured, “…Yes. It seems I must cut out the rotten flesh with my own hands.”
That night, Grand General Ha Jin finally made his decision.
Early fifth month, Zhongping 5th year (188 AD). Tao Qian’s residence, Xuzhou.
The weather was gradually growing hotter. Even in the shade of the trees, sweat still clung to the skin.
I sat with my legs crossed shamelessly, sipping tea, while Do Gyeom continued to stare at me with that stubborn gaze. This man really wore the words ‘suspicion’ and ‘wariness’ openly on his face, making him easy to read.
So I spoke in a very polite yet sarcastic tone. “Governor Do must have heard about the situation in Luoyang by now, I assume?”
Do Gyeom silently took a sip of tea. He was probably thinking, What scheme is this bastard plotting now?
“Grand General Ha Jin and the Ten Eunuchs. They’re practically at each other’s throats every day, even if swords aren’t drawn yet. It won’t be long before it explodes, don’t you think?”
Do Gyeom remained silent but gave a slight nod. That reaction alone was enough. He had already taken the bait.
I straightened my posture and lowered my voice. “Governor Do. Isn’t it about time you started thinking seriously about this?”
At that, Do Gyeom set down his teacup and frowned. “Stop beating around the bush and get to the point. Why have you come all the way to Xuzhou?”
I curled the corners of my lips. “The imperial relatives and the Ten Eunuchs. Governor Do, you too must make a choice soon, don’t you think?”
I could see his eyebrows twitch. His expression practically screamed You bastard! but I ignored it and continued.
“I was born a lowly man and never learned much. But even from the eyes of such an ignorant fool, it’s clear how much the imperial relatives have eaten away at Han.”
Do Gyeom’s eyes narrowed. I kept talking.
“Empress Lü, the Dou clan, and Wang Mang. Every single one of them threatened imperial authority, and in the end, Wang Mang even usurped the throne. Of course, the great Emperor Guangwu punished the usurper and restored the world.”
I paused briefly, then lowered my voice even further. “But the Ten Eunuchs? In the end, they are merely eunuchs. Everything depends on His Majesty’s will. I have never heard of eunuchs weakening imperial power and usurping the throne.”
At those words, Do Gyeom slammed his teacup down and shot to his feet. “Are you… suggesting we join hands with those eunuch bastards?!”
I didn’t even flinch and simply raised my hand slightly. “No, no~ It seems the Governor has misunderstood. I merely wish to say that the time for a choice will soon arrive.”
Do Gyeom was grinding his teeth. Inside, I chuckled. This old man still hasn’t kicked the bucket.
I muttered to myself like that, then gave a small smirk. I wiped the playful look from my face and spoke seriously.
“Governor Do.”
He continued glaring at me. His face made it obvious he didn’t want to hear anything I had to say.
“Whose fault is it that the court has fallen into this state? The imperial relatives seize power under the pretext of protecting the Emperor, while the eunuchs ride on the Emperor’s back and hold the hilt of the blade. However, the imperial relatives will never willingly relinquish their power, whereas the eunuchs are nothing more than a minor issue that can be wiped out with a single word from His Majesty.”
I picked up the teacup, then set it back down.
“So in the end, the question isn’t who is more dangerous… but who is more controllable.”
Do Gyeom’s eyes wavered slightly. I didn’t miss it.
“If His Majesty makes the right choice, the eunuchs are nothing more than the limbs of imperial authority. But the imperial relatives can strangle the Emperor’s power at any time. Just like Wang Mang did.”
I leaned forward slightly. Without any playfulness or bravado, I spoke with genuine sincerity.
“So I ask you, Governor Do.”
Do Gyeom did not avoid my gaze.
“The imperial relatives, or the eunuchs. Governor Do… you too must make your choice now.”
The room was silent. Only the sound of the wind brushing past the trees outside could be heard.
Do Gyeom did not answer. But his eyes had grown far heavier than before.
For me, that was enough. The water had entered the net. All that remained was deciding when to row the boat.