Sacrificing Myself (...?)
Sacrificing Myself (...?)
"Move faster. We must reach Henei before the day is out."
Dong Zhuo, mounted on Red Hare and bound for Xiliang, with her subordinates.
Hua Xiong, Li Jue, Guo Si.
And her troops, swollen to seventy thousand after eagerly absorbing Yellow Turban remnants.
The prospect of marching off to yet another fight without proper rest didn't exactly please her,
but at this moment, something else entirely had settled in her commanders' minds: curiosity.
"Mmmmuuum... My lord? Has something Dong Zhuo-friendly happened, by chance? Your mood has been remarkably good ever since we departed."
"Hoo-eeh... Li Jue also sees it that way-eh..."
"Unanticipated expedition. Anticipated dissatisfaction. Absent. Inquiring."
"Hm? I-it looks that way to you? N-no, it is not especially..."
Dong Zhuo answered with a flustered air, then clamped her mouth shut.
Watching her, the three officers' puzzlement only deepened.
True, her office had risen, but in substance it was nothing more than stopgap patching to put out an urgent fire.
By now they could have let her rest a bit,
perhaps because, as Yuan Shu put it, the court was so damnably bare of talent, or perhaps some other scheme lay underneath — she could not say which, but either way, this was emphatically not a path taken for her benefit.
And yet, in this instant, the three generals could sense it with their instincts.
Right now their master was — far from dissatisfied — inexplicably, visibly, quite happy.
Simply because she had risen to high office? ... Surely not.
The rank of General of the Left was considerable, but it was essentially a temporary post handed to a firefighter to quell the blaze.
She would receive no reinforcements beyond the troops already under her command,
and once the rebellion was suppressed and she was appointed to a proper Governor or Inspector post, the rank would fall away automatically — an empty façade.
The stipend had increased, at least, but the reality was that the improvement was barely worth mentioning.
Despite all that...
in this moment, Dong Zhuo radiated something that felt like heat, and she was in a tremendous hurry.
The Emperor had commanded that the rebels be swiftly put down,
and she had also received word to stop briefly at Hedong along the way to settle her Governor post, so a quick march was only proper.
Even accounting for that, however, Dong Zhuo was pressing the march to an excessive degree,
and at the same time, uncharacteristically, she looked extremely pleased.
To describe it concretely: Dong Zhuo appeared to be seized by what one calls excitement.
At ordinary affairs she would show a calm smile.
Or even at grave matters she would merely display a sinister expression with dark energy coiling off her — that was Dong Zhuo...
Yet from the lord before their eyes, in a way they could not get used to,
something that could only be called pure seemed to be emanating.
"Hoo-eehng... Whatever could have happened, I woondeeer...?"
"Unable to grasp. Incomprehensible situation. Close observation required."
"Mmmmuuum... As Hua Xiong sees it, it is this. It appears that something must have occurred concerning that General Yuan Shu."
"Hua Xiong's statement, valid. Following contact with General Yuan, anomalous response observed in lord thereafter."
"Ha-wawa... General Yuan Shu? What could have occurred with that gentlemaaan?"
"That is something... mmmuuung... Hua Xiong also does not know. Regrettably, Hua Xiong is no fortune-teller. But it is certain that something of great import seems to have taken place."
Li Jue and Guo Si nodded at Hua Xiong's assessment, while their expressions still voiced deep puzzlement.
True enough, during the time they had spent alongside that man, several things had occurred — fresh and shocking events such as they had never before experienced.
Battling enemies on an immense scale,
or a sandstorm and lightning that poured from a dry sky.
Each had been a difficult situation, but looking back now, having overcome them, they were clearly fine material for a warrior's drinking tale.
But what link could that have to their master's current state?
What effect could possibly have loosened Dong Zhuo, who was always as sharp as a whetted blade, to this degree?
Having failed to find an answer to that,
they could only study Dong Zhuo's face — which wore an unaccountably soft smile, slightly flushed — and mind her mood.
Meanwhile,
having withdrawn all interest from her subordinates' stares,
Dong Zhuo had begun to replay, once more, what had happened the day before.
Without realizing it, she was gently stroking the object fastened at the back of her hair.
*
"This is...?"
Dong Zhuo had been worrying that matters would drift along unresolved with their departure set for the following day.
Toward her, Yuan Shu drew something from within his robes and carefully extended it.
A golden hairpin.
The moment she saw that object — often exchanged when a man and woman exchanged a pledge — Dong Zhuo's heart began to tremble...
and then, Yuan Shu spoke, his voice weighty.
"Will you take this with you? And when the chance comes for us to meet again, set aside every other matter and come first to me and return it — so that I may... do up your hair."
"Ah..."
Dong Zhuo understood well what it meant to do up a woman's hair.
The joining of a woman and a man.
In a world where the concept of romantic love was scarce,
it signified a betrothal, very likely to lead to marriage.
Though they were forced to part now, if they met again in the future...
if her feelings remained unchanged then,
it meant he would accept her heart.
Genuinely joyful at that thought,
Dong Zhuo took the hairpin Yuan Shu offered and received it with care.
And then.
"!"
"Thank you... General Yuan... my... General Yuan..."
With that, Dong Zhuo threw all her strength into embracing Yuan Shu.
Holding a man within her full bosom for the first time, she savored for a while the warmth that reached her from his body.
Rejoicing that the affection she had felt for the first time had not shattered.
And vowing, deep in her heart, that no matter what happened from now on...
she would guard this precious seed and make it sprout as soon as she possibly could.
*
I had sent Dong Zhuo off with that pledge exchanged.
Although it was far from the picture I had first imagined, for now I judged that this was the best thing for Seon-i.
According to the Original Timeline, Dong Zhuo would spend nearly four-plus years in Xiliang fighting the rebels led by Han Sui.
This time, unlike then, she was marching in from the start with a huge army of seventy thousand, and the timing of her smashing the Yellow Turbans was also early, so I figured the odds that she would resolve things faster were high — but even so, I calculated she would still be tied up there for at least one or two years.
In any case, Dong Zhuo — having expanded her power there and succeeded in turning her subordinate government troops almost entirely into a private army — would later, after the death of the current Emperor Ling, receive a summons from General-in-Chief He Jin, who intended to execute the Ten Regular Attendants, and lead her forces to Luoyang.
In the process, fortune would place the emperor under his control, allowing him to enter Luoyang, seize the reins of power, and begin a full-blown reign of tyranny—that was Dong Zhuo's course in the Original Timeline.
And I had formed this pledge with her as a safety device to prevent that, and also as a means to confirm Dong Zhuo's feelings.
If we met again in the future...
In other words, when she returned to Luoyang, to set aside all other matters and come find me before anything else.
If here Dong Zhuo ignored her promise with me and tried, as in the Original Timeline, to aim for the emperor first and then take control of Luoyang — then my relationship with her would end there.
I would simply treat her as an "enemy" and crush her, just as I would have dealt with the Dong Zhuo of the Original Timeline.
On the other hand, if she pushed aside other affairs — even the chance to seize power — and instead came first to me,
if she truly showed that she would choose love over the ambition right before her eyes,
then I could believe her words: that she would give up her aspiration to rule the realm.
Moreover, if she went that far, I was willing to do exactly as she wished.
Sacrificing myself (...?) in order to erase one figure from the ranks of Wang Mang, Dong Zhuo, Cao Cao, and Sima Yi and save countless lives — that much was nothing...
To repeat: it was absolutely not because I coveted her terrifyingly immense chest.
The unutterably blissful sensation of that bosom I had felt when she held me once was definitely enough to cloud my mind, even knowing that now was not the time — but I would never be swayed merely by something like that, ahem.
At any rate, with the matter of Dong Zhuo deferred to a future day,
I was now taking leave of the remaining people before my eyes.
"Are you certain... you will not return? All I need to do is speak with General-in-Chief He Jin..."
"Indeed, Gonglu. Do not do this — come with us. You can well entrust the matters that remain to others."
Having received orders for Xiliang, Dong Zhuo had departed, while Yuan Shao and Cao Cao, summoned back by General-in-Chief He Jin, were returning to Luoyang.
To the two of them, who urged me to return together to Luoyang,
I gave my decision once more.
"I would like that as well, but someone must stay to wrap things up firmly, must they not? It will not take long; please go on ahead."
Given that the accomplishments I had piled up this time were so immense, a return to central politics was now within reach — I could manage it simply by sending word to my clan, without even going through the General-in-Chief.
Nevertheless, the reason I insisted on retaining the post of General Who Conquers the North for a while longer — under the excuse of mopping up — was, naturally, to achieve an objective one could call talent collection, or perhaps one might read as: a dream.
If I did not go now, meeting those people...
the Liu Bei three siblings, would very likely only happen after the Anti-Dong Zhuo Coalition was formed.
And if Dong Zhuo kept her promise with me, there was even a chance that it would become "Coalition? No such thing~."
So, with the feeling of if not now, when will I ever go meet them,
I had decided, as General Who Conquers the North, to head for You Province via this very Ji Province, under the pretext of suppressing Yellow Turban remnants.
"Take care of yourself. Do not fall ill."
"Resolve it quickly and come back, Gonglu. If you are late, these elder sisters of yours might grow tired of waiting and come find you again."
"Yes, do not worry. I will settle it in a flash and return."
Yuan Shao's words held concern, and Cao Cao's farewell carried a strange vitality, as if something had rekindled in her compared to when she had first arrived.
With those reluctant goodbyes to my elder sisters, I slowly began to march the troops north.
Excluding the seventy thousand Dong Zhuo had taken,
and the fifty thousand Yuan Shao and Cao Cao were bringing back to Luoyang,
the total forces remaining to me numbered one hundred thirty thousand.
Leading a great host — actually larger than when I had arrived, the result of splitting the Yellow Turban prisoners with Dong Zhuo — with Ji Ling and Xu Rong flanking me, I moved while dealing with nearby Yellow Turban remnants.
At last, I was filled with surging anticipation: the fact that I would soon see my absolute favorites, the Peach Sisters.
*
In the hours when darkness had fallen,
a band of Yellow Turbans were sprawled inside a forest, taking their rest.
The Yellow Turbans, weary and wounded, were visibly in poor condition.
Even so, they were much at ease, having been reassured by the fact that they had reached this Ji Province.
"Fortunately, somehow, we have arrived here."
"It was truly hard — thanks to that detestable wench who clung on viciously."
"Speaking of which... what happened to those tiny brats? You know. The ones we captured alive last time."
"Ah, those fellows — by now our chieftain, who went on a day ahead... Khurrgghk!!!"
In that instant, a spear suddenly flew in and pierced the Yellow Turban's throat.
Those sitting around him felt shock seize them and yanked out their weapons.
"Th-this is...?"
"I-Impossible... how is it already...?"
The Yellow Turbans stared toward the place the spear had come from, half-convinced it could not be.
Immediately after,
their faces began to fill with profound despair.
"Found you..."
A woman, gripping yet another spear in her hand, was approaching them.
With long green hair tied back and green pupils, a woman of youthful appearance.
Giving off the air of a wild beast emerging from the brush, she directed a chilling killing intent toward the Yellow Turbans and demanded:
"Where have you hidden them? My little ones."