I Want to Cry, Damn It
I Want to Cry, Damn It
"He's an Evil God worshipper!! There's no other explanation!! How can you just gloss over it like this?? This is a heresy inquisition, so do it properly!! I won't accept this!! That man is an Evil God worshipper!! He needs to be examined more thoroughly! Use mind control, use a stronger miracle! Do anything!!"
Tudel didn't seem to be in her right mind.
Madness leaked from her half-crazed eyes, and her jabbing finger looked hysterical.
The witches and mages of the Magic Tower seemed bewildered.
The people of the Lilia Order were gradually transforming from fanatics who had been moved to tears in real time into something resembling the priests from that berserker manga.
They wore expressions that looked ready to raise their scriptures and shout, "You blasphemer!!" at any moment.
"Everyone else is strange!! No, common sense says a miracle performed without magic or holy power is impossible!! Has there ever been a saint like that? This is a fraud!! An elaborately planned, wicked fraud!! I cannot accept this verdict!! Even if I'm alone, I'll keep insisting!! That man is not a saint!! He's a fraud!!"
"Such insolence!!"
The Lilia followers, including High Priest Yodel, erupted and rose from their seats.
Some of the holy knights even drew their swords and wreathed them in holy power.
"This insult is unacceptable!! What are you saying about our order's saint?!"
Whoa.
Perfect.
If they just held a scripture and smashed someone's head in that state, it'd be exactly that scene you'd see all the time in memes.
The moment High Priest Yodel shouted in anger, the judge standing at the bench—
That is, High Priest Gerson of the Silence Order—raised his hand and stopped the Lilia followers.
"Plaintiff Tudel. Are you challenging the Pantheon's judgment?"
"Yes. High Priest Gerson. I cannot accept this verdict! Records clearly remain of individuals who mislead people with occult arts that are neither holy power nor magic. Surely the Silence Order, of all people, cannot be unaware of this fact!! To simply acknowledge a man like that as a saint is far too dangerous!!"
At Tudel's words, Gerson looked at her with a perfectly expressionless face.
"You seem to be speaking of the Evil God's Chosen, 'The One with a Thousand Faces.' Am I correct?"
"That's right!! Everyone, think carefully!! It's all circumstantial evidence!!! The miracles he performed, the words he spoke. The verdict was decided based solely on the memories of those around him!! I do not doubt the Silence Order, but I believe there is a need to look into his soul!! Who knows what sinister plan he might be hiding in his heart?!"
"You!! You!!"
High Priest Yodel was on the verge of becoming Mozgus MK2 and hurling a scripture at her.
I quickly waved my hand and told Yodel not to move.
For now...
I had to watch the situation for a moment.
"Because a heresy inquisition, and especially a heresy inquisition regarding a saint, must be more thorough than anything else!! I will state the necessity of looking into his memories and soul!!"
At Tudel's words, High Priest Gerson shrugged his shoulders.
"I acknowledge it. As the plaintiff, you have that right. A heresy inquisition concerning a saint must be absolutely clear and certain. If you wish, I will arrange proceedings to look into the saint's memories and soul."
At those words, Yodel exploded.
"Unacceptable!! Look into his soul and memories?! Such an act is only done to Evil God worshippers or demon cultists!!! Why must he endure such an insult when the verdict has already declared him a saint?!"
The Lilia followers agreed with Yodel's words.
They were ferocious enough to start a riot at any moment.
But even at that moment, my mind was racing.
Somehow.
I had to prove I wasn't a saint.
My memories.
My soul.
Honestly, it was embarrassing to show them to others.
But nothing could be as certain as looking into my memories and soul.
Because if they saw my memories, it meant they could also see the memories of the time I lived in Korea.
Saints come in all kinds.
But first, you had to be a person of this world to become a saint, right?
If it was revealed that I was a person from a completely different world, no one would believe I was a saint anymore.
I knew.
I knew revealing my reincarnation from another world was dangerous.
I didn't know how the people of this world would accept a person who came from another world.
Perhaps they might harm me for being a dimension traveler.
No protagonist in any novel I had ever read had done such a stupid fucking thing as revealing their reincarnation from another world.
But so what?
I thought being exposed as a reincarnator was better than dying from divine punishment.
Burning at the stake.
I was sick and tired of living in fear of divine punishment.
"Look into my memories and soul. If that dispels the doubts of the last remaining person, then doing so is the right course."
"Saint!"
"Mustn't it be certain? High Priest Gerson. Please do it."
At my words, Gerson stared at me silently.
The emotion cast over his face was clearly respect.
"All secrets shall be revealed before Le-Neri. Prepare the Miracle of Soul Interference."
The priests of the Silence Order gathered around me and began preparing the miracle. Then Gerson looked at Tudel.
"We shall examine the soul, so you examine the memories. You will have no complaints with that, will you?"
Tudel smiled as she stepped down from the gallery and toward me.
"No complaints at all!"
Tudel and the priests of the Silence Order stood before me.
Magic and miracles were simultaneously cast toward my body.
"Oh, Goddess of Grace!! What an insult this is!!!......."
Old Man Yodel.
Sorry.
Your anger is useless.
I'm quitting being a saint.
So take care.
Now!
Reveal my memories as a reincarnator!!!!!
I'm quitting being a saint!!! Yodel!!!!!!
Slowly.
I felt an unfamiliar sensation digging into my brain and body.
I squeezed my eyes shut.
It was over.
I'd even revealed that I was a reincarnator.
If I'd made this much of a fuss.......
Please, just let me quit being a saint.
***
For one hour.
Witch Tudel and the priests of the Silence Order slowly examined my soul and memories.
Then they opened their eyes and withdrew from me.
"The saint's soul was pure. No trace of black magic or any sign of the Evil God was found. I can swear it upon Le-Neri, Father of Darkness and Secrets. He is not an Evil God worshipper."
At the Silence Order's words, the Lilia followers nodded as if they had known it all along.
"Tudel. What of the memories you saw? Were there any memories that could mark him as an Evil God worshipper?"
High Priest Gerson questioned Tudel.
At his words, Tudel wore a slightly confused expression.
"No.......no. This is something.......no.......it's strange. It's strange."
She muttered as if insane.
"How......how can there be such memories? Is it a scene from the future? Or is it a memory from before he was born? That city? Those automobiles? What in the world is it? What did I see?"
Toward her confused muttering, Gerson narrowed his eyes.
"Were there memories that could mark him as an Evil God worshipper? Or not? Speak. Witch Tudel."
At those words, Tudel flinched.
"I don't know how to explain this.......for now, I'll show you the fragments of memory I saw."
Tudel aimed her wand at her own head and then fired a massive illusion spell into the air.
And inside that illusion spell, scenes far too familiar to me were displayed.
A massive city.
Seoul.
Brilliant nightscapes and the Hangang Bridge.
Countless people and cars filling the streets.
Computers. Smartphones. Delivery food.
People walking among the Hangul letters so familiar to me.
The memories of South Korean citizen Kim Min-gyu, not Jericho Amael, were nakedly revealed to everyone.
After the scenes, which were clearly not the Arkal Empire to anyone's eyes, passed by, the illusion spell ended.
I closed my eyes.
I'd gone this far.
Yes.
I am not a person of this world.
I'm just a Korean who reincarnated with erotic-game abilities.
I am not a person of this world in the first place!!!
Am I still a saint after this?
Am I still a saint after this?
"What in the world.......what were those scenes......."
Everyone in the courtroom, including High Priest Gerson, wore blank expressions.
Even Witch Tudel looked confused.
While everyone fell silent and wondered what they had just seen.
Suddenly.
"Perhaps it's because he's from a renowned prophetic family. Didn't he see the future?"
The owner of the restaurant where I'd briefly worked casually blurted out a remark.
"Anyone can see it's a scene from the future!! Those towering skyscrapers. Those sleek cars filling the streets. In about fifty years or so, the Arkal Empire will look exactly like that. Why are you all so surprised by something so obvious?"
At those words, a fire lit in the eyes of the people who had been stammering, unsure how to interpret what they had just seen.
"Indeed!.......They did say he was a son of the renowned Jericho prophetic family!!"
"So that was it!! He'd seen the future through prophecy!!"
Ah, shit......
"No! I'm a reincarnator!! I'm someone who lived in another world and crossed over to this world! Do you still not understand?! I am not a saint!! I am not a person of this world in the first place!!"
When I yelled, one of the priests of the Prophecy Order, followers of the God of the Future Lupiel among the twenty-four Pantheon orders, rose from his seat.
"Don't you simply possess memories that feel as if you lived in that world? Oh saint?"
"No! It's not just that memories remain; I actually lived and came here from that place!!"
At my words, the priest of the Prophecy Order fell silent for a moment with a grave expression before opening his mouth.
"He is a Seer. Everyone. Occasionally, there are people like that. It is a term for those who directly glimpse an enormous length of the future at a very young age, when the soul is most free, and mistake it as memories of a past life."
"No, I'm not a Seer, I'm a real reincarnator!!......."
"Let me guess something. Saint, for someone from a renowned prophetic family, you weren't good at prophesying the future, were you?"
At those words, the restaurant owner and my old neighbors who had watched me since childhood nodded their heads.
"We saw with our own eyes how you were mistreated every day for being poor at seeing the future!"
At my words, the priest of the Prophecy Order nodded.
"It is certain. He is a Seer. He is the type of prophet who exhausted all his prophetic ability in one go during childhood and thus could no longer see the future. In the future scenes you just witnessed, there would have been unfamiliar letters, cities, and terrains you'd never seen before. These are symptoms caused by glimpsing the future as a child. Because he had not yet learned letters and could not see the world broadly, the letters, terrains, and cities were distorted strangely and remained in memory."
"Indeed!!!"
"We thought he was a saint.......but he is also a Seer?!"
I was going insane and hopping mad.
Even after all this, I'm still a saint?
And now I'm a Seer too??
As I stood there dumbfounded with my jaw dropped, staring blankly into the air, the priests of the Prophecy Order rose in unison and bowed their heads toward me.
"We show our respect to the one who has seen the most vast future. All members of the Prophecy Order behold the Seer and Healing Saint. May a brilliant future be granted to you."
I laughed.
By now, all I could do was laugh at the absurdity.
What more could I possibly do now?
What more must I do before they'll believe I'm not the Healing Saint?!
I'm telling you, I'm going to get struck by lightning from Goddess Lilia and die!!
I want to cry.
I really want to fucking cry.
And it seemed I wasn't the only one who wanted to cry.
"N-no. That's impossible. That, that bastard can't really be a saint......."
Witch Tudel was muttering as if she had lost her mind.