Chapter 81
Chapter 81
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 81
Chapter Title: Not a Self-Deprecating Stream
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“Sukka comrade! Our comrades have retrieved the great Sukka comrade’s bag!”
“Th-thank you. Of course, you didn’t hurt the pickpocket, right?”
“Yup! He just dropped the bag mid-chase and ran off!”
“You’ve all worked hard. But could you fix your speech a bit? It might get us reported if it’s on stream...”
“S-so, honorable...”
“...”
A moment later, having recovered my bag, I took a quick look around.
Dozens of viewers who’d helped with this incident had gathered.
Some viewers had even brought tanks.
Two IS-2 tanks were parked in the street like they were controlling it, and the tankers were eyeing me eagerly, as if hoping for some praise.
Because of that, all the other users and NPCs were staring our way.
It looked less like a fan meet and more like prepping for war, so their reaction was pretty much inevitable.
Of course, I was thrilled they’d helped, but their fan passion was running a bit hot.
I calmed down Yelena, who was shouting “Big Sis Kkamnyangi is amazing!”, and stepped forward.
“Everyone, pay attention to me for a sec. Editor, can you set some ground rules?”
“Ground rules!!”
“Infantry, form up in five ranks.”
“Form up!!”
I’d felt the need to take control and gave the order, but the viewers moved with surprising precision.
Even as they joked around, they fell into formation, reminiscent of the comrades I’d once commanded.
Soon, the comrades lined up in five ranks started whispering excitedly about something.
I decided to check just how many had gathered and gave the next order.
“Before we move, let’s take a headcount. Count off by row, starting with one, and sit as you go.”
“Two!”
“Three!”
“Four!”
“Five!”
“Six! End count!”
As expected from conscript nation veterans, they handled it flawlessly.
Surprisingly, two female viewers were mixed in, but they blended in naturally too.
Excluding the tankers, we had thirty confirmed.
There were still plenty of viewers en route to Odessa, so we could easily swell past platoon size into company territory.
But the growing numbers didn’t feel like a burden.
Lieutenant Victoria Chernakoshka of the 3rd Shock Army’s 79th Corps, 150th Rifle Division—that was me. Commanding a company was easier than eating tushonka.
“High school grad with service record has insane leadership.”
“Ehehe... Look at her all confident... She’s too cute...”
“Ugh... Sukka’s female viewers are way more pervy.”
“What did you say?”
I gave the platoon time to bond while I planned our next moves.
We might be sticking together from here on, so familiarizing faces was smart.
Of course, that included introducing my charge, Yelena.
With that in mind, I let the girl I’d been holding go free.
“Wow! So many soldiers! Are all these big brothers and sisters Big Sis Kkamnyangi’s subordinates?”
“You bet! We’re Sukka’s comrades!”
“Huh? Then why’ve you been cussing at Big Sis Kkamnyangi? You don’t curse at your subordinates!”
“Kahaha! You’re too young to get it! ‘Sukka’ ain’t just a curse! It’s a title ripped from the enemy’s dying screams!”
“Ooh!!”
Thankfully, the platoon got along great with Yelena.
Sure, portraying me as some bloodthirsty war maniac grated a bit, but true to my viewers, they doted on the cute girl.
That gave me a breather to scan the surroundings again.
I eavesdropped on some nearby users whispering.
“Those Korean players?”
“Huh? Aren’t they actual soldiers training? No way civilians move like that.”
“Korea’s a conscript country like Russia. Plus, their service is double ours. You ever queue Korean servers in FPS? You get a warning just entering.”
“For real? That country’s nuts.”
Looked like we should move soon.
To my ears, it sounded like mocking Korea’s conscription, but my chat was loving it: “A country where most adult men can shoot!”
No need to stir up national pride and have my viewers pick a fight with the Red Army.
I called Yelena over and quickly issued the next order.
“Alright, time to relocate. You’ve all earned it—I’ll whip up something tasty.”
“Woo! Torture instead of reward?!”
“...”
“Ah, no! Joke! Total joke!”
“That’s mean...”
Ugh... Time to show ‘em who’s boss this time.
Gotta hit up Shin Ara for that tushonka sandwich recipe ASAP.
“Cut the lame jokes. Male comrades, head to Yellow Rock Beach. Get the cooking prep started. Female comrades, follow me. I need help shopping for ingredients. Sound good?”
“Yessir!!”
“Good. Move without bothering other users or NPCs. Pile into the tanks together.”
“Got it!!”
Soon, the male platoon members hopped on the tanks and headed to Yellow Rock Beach.
Twenty-eight of them, excluding the two women, but with two tanks, no one got left behind.
Now that it was just us girls, I finally felt some breathing room.
I messaged the manager chat for the “tushonka sandwich recipe” and headed to the grocery store.
“Didn’t expect female viewers to join. Thanks so much for helping.”
“Ehehe... How’s she so sweet and cute...”
“I’m not cute. Let’s grab ingredients quick and head back.”
“Oh, yeah!”
Thankfully, shopping went fast and smooth.
Shin Ara, watching the stream, had sent the recipe right away.
Loaded with heavy bags, we reached Yellow Rock Beach to find the rest of the platoon on the wide sands.
Amazingly, they’d even started a fire for cooking and were goofing off.
They’d crossed the two tanks’ barrels to make a goalpost and were playing volleyball with some mystery ball.
Good to see platoon bonding, but skipping me felt a tad annoying.
Still, they’d caught the pickpocket, so I’d forgive some team fun.
I set the ingredients down at the ready impromptu kitchen.
“Oh? Sukka’s here!”
“Yeah, back. What’re you all up to?”
“We’re playing Sukka-ball.”
“Huh? Sukka-ball?”
“Yeah, beach volleyball.”
“...”
Sukka means bitch in English, so that’s the pun.
Makes sense, but as the Sukka in question, it rubbed me wrong.
I ignored the smug platoon and started cooking.
Viewers’ jokes only got worse if you played along—lesson learned.
[Sukka: Ara unnie, starting cooking now. What do I do?]
[Kukudas: Got it! Open the tushonka first and drain the fat. Grill till Maillard reaction kicks in.]
[Sukka: Too fast. What’s Maillard reaction?]
[Kukudas: When it browns nice. Grill till no moisture left.]
[Sukka: Won’t long cooking ruin tushonka’s texture?]
[Kukudas: Sukka, what’d I say yesterday? Beginners stick to the recipe.]
[Sukka: Yesss....]
I followed Shin Ara’s instructions step by step.
Cheating where no one’d catch me.
Not my original recipe, but necessary to quash cooking skill drama.
Any taste flaws from my noob skills? Blame batch-cooking mishaps.
Yelena and a few platoon members helped, so it wasn’t tough.
Field cooking’s all about speed—tushonka sandwiches done in a flash.
“Quit playing and eat up. Made tushonka sandwiches.”
“Dog paw sandwiches...”
“Huh? Why the faces? Don’t want my food?”
“N-no such thing!”
The Sukka-ball players lined up.
But no one looked excited about the food.
I’m confident this time, and they’re so mean.
Feeling a bit sulky, I decided to feed Yelena first.
“Yelena, these uncles don’t want any. Let’s eat while it’s hot.”
“Huh? Can I have some?”
“‘Course. You helped make ‘em. Plenty to go around.”
“Really?!”
I handed a sandwich to beaming Yelena.
Small mouth like mine, but she chomped it with gusto.
Her face lit up: First time eating something this good!
I grinned, feeling accomplished.
“Mmm! So good!”
“Tasty, huh?”
“Yeah! You try! I’ll feed ya!”
“Alright, one bite.”
I took the bite Yelena offered.
She fed me one, then bit into the saucy part herself.
Chewy meat, soft bread, spicy-salty sauce—impressive combo.
Packed with veggies for nutrition—anyone’d love it.
Seeing us, the platoon rushed for their shares.
But sadly, Yelena and I blushed mid-chew.
“Gasp!”
“Eek!”
Something hidden in the veggies asserted itself.
Added chili for Korean taste—delayed spiciness made our hair stand on end.
I swallowed somehow and checked Yelena—her blue eyes were tearing up.
We locked eyes and screamed our verdict on the tushonka sandwich.
“Gaaah!! It’s spiiiicy!!”
“S-sis!! Water!!”
Supposed to be Shin Ramen level, but this was Shin Ara level.
Worse, I chugged what I thought was water—vodka. Felt like my tongue got yanked out.
Yelena and I stomped and wailed.
Two cats howling at the sky.
“NyaAAAAAOW!!!!”
“NyahAAAAAACK!!!!”
Meanwhile, the platoon watched like “What’s spicy about this?”.
Native Koreans numb to spice—infuriating.