Not a Black Flame Dragon, but the Black Goat's Lamb
When I was first born, I was a mute human named Ryu Migun.
But names change.
Depending on what I am, and what I do.
Even when I was just a human, I acquired many names.
Ryu Migun, scum, demon king, monkey.
Time kept flowing.
My own will didn't matter.
...
..
.
I became an archdevil, no longer even human, and later, a dragon.
Others saw me wielding black flames and called me the Black Flame Dragon.
To be honest, that was my favorite name.
Because at some point, I had wished to become a dragon.
But time kept flowing.
My own will didn't matter.
More... more... more...
...
..
.
At some point, other entities began calling me a great existence.
Or an Outer God.
Some even called me Shub-Niggurath and revered me as their mother.
By then, the gender I was born with had long since become meaningless.
Time... kept flowing. Endlessly. Eternally.
Still, my own will didn't matter.
...
..
.
And when I reached the end of time... the conclusion.
I was merely a 'goat.'
To add one more detail, since I was black, I suppose you could call me a 'black goat.'
And then, I realized.
That I was finally free.
So, I decided to enjoy my freedom.
I turned back time.
Because now, my own will was the most precious thing of all.
...
..
.
.
..
...
Everything was going so well up to that point...
You have obtained a summon: Loyal Dog.
I placed the pitiful beast into 'my heaven'... the dark red status window.
...A 'pitiful' 'beast.'
:: Haha... ::
What a truly ridiculous situation this has become.
I never imagined that when I shed the lamb's disguise and became one, the 'unification' would happen in such a way.
:: My loyal dog, do you know? ::
That I was being incredibly... incredibly lenient with you?
That the flame at the end, which must have been excruciatingly painful... was actually 'treatment'?
Of course, seeing you despair was quite a pleasant sight. For the current me, that is a form of amusement.
However, the current me also... pitied your tragic life, which is why I healed you and took you into my embrace.
...You probably didn't know, but the situation you were in wasn't all that different from the one I am in now.
It's just that while I tried to replicate the same thing, my version was much closer to perfection.
:: ...Though it may be a fake, the caliber of its creator is entirely different, so this is only natural. ::
Little Lamb (EX)... which has now been burned by hellfire and is written as Lamb (EX).
When I was the Little Lamb, I didn't know its true identity.
Reality manipulation? Alteration of common sense? It does have those effects.
But its most important function is separating 'me.'
More precisely, it is an ability to keep distinguishing the 'goat who returned to the past' from the 'sixteen-year-old me who became the lamb.'
And now, the wall that separated the two has vanished, and they have become one again.
Ultimately, since the essence of both is 'the mute named Ryu Migun,' this is only natural.
The problem is that this wasn't created solely by my own power.
...In this world, there are existences who have obtained 'freedom' in their own ways, just like me.
Before turning back time, I planned the 'Great Work' and fashioned the 'Little Lamb.'
At that time, I stole a few missing pieces from the mysteries of other free existences.
Among them, the 'ability to distinguish myself' was stolen from the mystery of the one called 'Light.'
Since even I couldn't understand the true principle behind it, I reverse-engineered it from the result and recreated it in my own way.
Consequently, even though I created it, I do not know all of its effects.
Because in order to achieve the desired effect, I imported parts whose underlying principles I did not understand.
...Which means I have no idea what might happen in an unforeseen situation.
Still... I thought it wouldn't matter much since I never planned on deactivating it anyway...
:: How absurd. ::
To think that the ego of the 'goat who spent an infinite eternity' and the ego of the 'lamb who lived for sixteen years' would mix... in an exact fifty-fifty split.
...This is too much. Is this even right?
Anyone can see that the goat should have devoured the lamb and run wild by now!!
I should be subjecting that wolf or whatever beast it is—the one that dared to blow Sister Yumina away in a single blow—to eternal reincarnation and infinite regression, killing it in the most horrific way possible!!
Is it because the original consists of three in one, while I'm currently making one out of just two, that I ended up in this pathetic state?
What kind of ridiculous mystery is this? Is an infinite eternity a joke? Do I really have to pity and even heal a creature like that just because of the ego of a sixteen-year-old brat who's barely a drop in the bucket of time?!
Normally—
—I stopped my thoughts there and composed my emotions.
:: ...Haha, hahahahaha!!! ::
What a bizarre mystery this truly is.
They really have mixed fifty-fifty. I was thinking like the goat, but before I knew it, I was throwing a tantrum like the lamb!
Because the sixteen-year-old me was a mortal who couldn't even control his own emotions properly.
Furthermore, while I pitied the puppy with the lamb's goodness, I enjoyed tormenting the mutt with the goat's malice.
Even when looking at a single entity, contradictory emotions arise, yet there isn't even a hint of identity confusion.
...This is truly bizarre.
Of course, I didn't want to know about a mystery like this.
I didn't need to know in the first place. After all, this change only happened because I deactivated the lamb.
But I never had any intention of deactivating the lamb in the first place!!
...What? You're asking if I can't just activate the lamb again?
Even if I use Little Lamb (EX) again now, a complete separation is impossible.
Since I cobbled it together by stealing various mysteries from others, I had to burn a bit of it with my flames when I deactivated it...
So... it's a bit broken right now.
...This is the not-so-small price that the 'goat' spoke of to the 'lamb.'
...To explain it like the lamb would, think of clay.
You take red clay and blue clay, slap them together once, and pull them apart. You don't even need to knead them together.
Just by doing that—really, just sticking them together and pulling them apart—the two clays will already mix slightly.
Preventing even this slight mixing was the power of Little Lamb (EX). I don't know the principle behind it.
Of course, since Little Lamb (EX) hasn't completely burned to ashes yet, separation is still possible if I use it.
However, due to the damage, a slight mixing has occurred, meaning the 'lamb' can no longer be a 'pure lamb.'
It will merely become a 'goat in lamb's clothing.'
For the original plan of the Great Work, the lamb needed to remain pure at all times.
Of course, though I am now called a free existence...
:: Being free does not equate to being omnipotent. ::
Fixing Little Lamb (EX) to perfectly separate the mixed lamb and goat as before is impossible, even for me... for now.
That is why the 'goat' in me tried to prevent shedding the lamb's disguise at all costs.
...But there was an exception.
An exception that could only be known through direct experience.
An exception where I absolutely had to shed the lamb's disguise.
:: ...Yes. So, are you satisfied seeing me in this ridiculous state? ::
:: O 'Heaven,' and O 'Light.' ::
No answer came, but I knew they were listening.
For they are the same as me.
:: Heaven, out of respect for you, I conformed to your framework even when fashioning the lamb. ::
:: Yet you violated the very rules you established, keeping me and her trapped in this cave. ::
:: In that case, is there any reason for me to follow rules that even you do not keep? ::
:: Light, did it displease you that I copied a fraction of your mystery? ::
:: Or did you pity this beast, who likely never even knew your name in its entire life, so much that you would perform the miracle of resurrection? ::
:: It is your fault. If it were such a grand truth, you shouldn't have left even a name behind. ::
:: ...However, I will admit that this was ultimately my mistake. ::
:: Though it was a mistake I would never have had to realize if not for your interference. ::
Originally, the story in this cave was supposed to end with Sister Yumina landing a headshot on the wolf.
After that, we would exit the gate according to the status window's guidance, share a warm hug, and make a promise to meet again. That should have been it.
But... 'Heaven' broke its own rules and refused to let us exit the gate via the status window.
'Light' resurrected the dead wolf, allowing the beast to defy us once more. Maybe I really should just kill it.
...Sigh. The Great Work I planned wouldn't have had a bad outcome for them either.
I don't understand why they are interfering with me.
It's not like we hang out or have social gatherings just because we are equals, but they can still roughly perceive what others are doing and what they want in their own ways.
...And of course, so can I.
:: Light, I do not know if this was your intention, but I felt a sense of kinship with that beast. ::
:: Thus, I have spared its life and taken it in, so be satisfied with this. ::
:: Heaven, my 'Great Work' will not interfere with the order you desire. ::
:: I do not know what you want, but I will tolerate no further interference. ::
:: Though it's not as if you can do anything for the time being anyway. ::
:: Since I acknowledge this was my mistake, I will not retaliate this time. ::
:: However, if you interfere with my Great Work any further, I will show you. ::
:: Exactly how I obtained my freedom. ::
...That should be enough of a warning.
Any more than this cannot be resolved with words, and unleashing excessive power here would only ruin my Great Work.
The more I reveal my original power, the more the lamb's disguise—Little Lamb (EX)—will burn away with it.
Of course, Little Lamb (EX) is already imperfect.
But considering the ultimate goal of the Great Work, only two things matter.
1. Make the 'lamb' as strong, good, and happy as possible.
2. Keep the 'goat' and the 'lamb' perfectly separated.
...Of these, the second does not necessarily have to be achieved through Little Lamb (EX).
It might take a detour, but I already have a method in mind that I thought of while training the puppy.
A way to perfectly separate the 'black goat' and the 'lamb' once again.
However, for this to work, I still need the lamb's disguise, even if it is broken.
Next...
Looking down at the ground, I saw a worn-out axe.
Something deeply nostalgic, or perhaps something that was always by my side.
My partner.
I picked it up and infused a bit of my flame into it.
An axe is meant for chopping wood.
My flame is meant for burning the world.
So, it becomes this.
...A memory from a very distant past, or perhaps from just six days ago, came to mind.
"Don't worry. Even if I don't need you anymore, I'll keep you safe."
:: ...Hahahahaha!!! ::
I have kept my promise this time.
With this, even the lamb should be able to protect herself.
And as for the rest...
...
..
.
Having finished the necessary preparations, I waited for Sister Yumina to open her eyes.
...I know it's absolutely necessary, but it doesn't make me feel any better.
Still, I won't enjoy doing this to her the way I did with that beast earlier.
Because she is precious to both the 'goat' and the 'lamb.'
—Yumina
I opened my eyes, feeling a slight headache.
...What happened to me?
Clearly, after entering the predator-type gate, the Wolf's Den, which I was forced into with little Mijeong...
We defeated the wolf once, but then, a two-headed wolf resurrected in a bright light...
"Mijeong!"
The moment I regained consciousness, I searched for Mijeong first.
It's dangerous! Since I was taken down by the wolf, what happened after that...?
"...Mijeong?"
Without having to search hard, I saw a figure who looked like Mijeong standing in the center of the cave, her back turned to me.
The wolf was nowhere to be seen.
...But something was off.
The horns on her head were not those of a lamb, but long and white, like a goat's.
Her hair, which used to be fluffy like sheep's wool, was now dull and gray, like burnt ashes.
The clothes she wore had changed into a black dress.
The entity turned to look at me.
"Wow! You're finally awake. Mommy!"
The child's bright smile was incredibly beautiful.
...But, Mommy?
"Mijeong, what... Mommy all of a sudden... what does that mean? No, before that, what's with that appearance, and what about the wolf—"
"Hmm? Mommy, you're saying such strange things."
"...What?"
"Who on earth is Mijeong?"
"...Who are you?"
Even though her appearance had changed slightly, she still retained enough of her distinct features that I thought she was Mijeong.
Not anymore.
It was someone else... occupying Mijeong's body.
The entity spoke.
:: If you're curious, you can check for yourself. After all, you have good eyes, Mommy. ::
Golden Eyes.
This entity knew about my Golden Eyes.
...I'm terrified. I don't want to check.
I don't want to confirm that the entity in front of me isn't Mijeong.
Because there is no one else in this cave besides me and this entity.
...But I have to check.
Because I promised to protect that child.
Golden Eyes (S)
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"...I can't see... anything...?"
:: Haha! Mommy. It turns out your eyesight isn't that good after all, is it? ::
:: But even without Golden Eyes, you can tell just by looking. ::
...She was right. I could tell just by looking at the horns.
It was even clearer if I looked at her eyes.
A goat. With white horns and black clothes...
"...A black goat?"
:: Wow! You got it right, Mommy! ::
"Why... why do you keep calling me Mommy?!"
:: Because, thanks to you, Mommy... ::
Fwoosh!
"Ugh!"
A terrifyingly hot black flame erupted.
Without realizing it, I took a few steps back and fell over.
For some reason, I couldn't breathe.
So, I had no choice but to bow my head.
And I had no choice but to keep listening to its words.
:: ...I was able to be born. ::
"What do you mean...?"
I managed to force my mouth open, but I shouldn't have.
Because what followed was a succession of horrific words.
:: This child was originally nothing more than a burnt offering for me. ::
:: However, the ritual that summoned me wasn't perfect. ::
:: Thanks to that, a mere sacrifice insolently maintained its ego and occupied its own body. ::
Ritual, sacrifice...
The thoughts I had organized in my head during lunch flashed through my mind.
The dreadful voice continued.
:: But then you were taken down in a single blow by a lowly beast. ::
:: Thanks to that, this child despaired. ::
:: And that is how I was able to awaken. ::
:: So, shouldn't I personally call you Mommy? ::
...
I said I would protect Mijeong...
Because I was weak... because of that...
Instead... Mijeong...?
"Ah, ah..."
:: ...Oh my, you couldn't even handle this much? It's fine. ::
:: Didn't I call you Mommy? ::
:: Since things went smoothly thanks to you, I will show you my filial piety for the first and last time. ::
Flames flickered at the tips of its fingers.
A black flame, terrifyingly hot, making the surroundings seem even darker.
The flame approached me.
Slowly.
Gradually.
Approaching me...
...
..
.
The flame remained stopped right in front of me.
"Gasp... Huh...?"
I reopened my eyes, which I had closed in fear of certain death.
When I opened them, the one standing before me was still the goat, but...
The look in her eyes was different.
...Mijeong spoke.
"Mi...na, Sister..."
"Mijeong!"
Her appearance was still that of a goat, but I could tell!
It was Mijeong!
The kind little lamb who had been with me all this time!
...The child was still fighting!
So I shouldn't give up either—
"...please, lamb."
"...What did you say?"
"Please... kill me... lamb."
—Ah.
What did I just hear?
Tears streamed from the child's eyes.
She opened her mouth once more.
"I don't... want to kill you either, Sister... lamb."
...
"So... please... just kill me... instead... lamb."
...
...No.
"Mijeong, don't say such things!"
"...I was... so... happy today... lamb. Eating spaghetti... for the first time... and you hugging me... and someone like me... being able to save you, Sister..."
"Please! Mijeong, Mijeong... please..."
"So... if it's for you, Sister... I don't mind dying."
I wanted to save the child.
But there was nothing I could do.
So, I could only stare at her.
With my completely useless eyes.
The child said to me.
"...I'm sorry... lamb... I said... something useless again... lamb... Actually... I can do it... by myself."
"...What?"
The black flame that had been approaching me, only to stop.
The flame burning at the child's fingertips moved.
...Toward the child's own face.
"Yumina... Sister... I'm sorry... I ate the spaghetti... so slowly... lamb."
"No... NO!!!!!!"
The moment the black flame was about to consume the child.
A miracle occurred.
The information shown by my useless Golden Eyes changed.
The dreadful flame began to fade.
The horns, long and white like a goat's, curled back into lamb's horns.
Her ash-colored hair regained its fluffiness.
The devil left its final words.
:: This is... I see. So it works this way? ::
:: ...It matters not. Time is always on my side. ::
:: Child, call upon me whenever you wish. I shall become your strength. ::
The child collapsed.
...Yumina, get a grip!!!
"Mijeong!"
I rushed toward the child.
Little Lamb (EX)
I put the lamb's disguise back on at the perfect moment and ended the performance.
The egos and powers of the 'lamb' and the 'goat' separated once more. The same went for their memories.
Though it was no longer perfect, leaving a slight influence on each other, separation was still possible.
...I felt quite bad for what I did to her.
I intentionally revealed a bit of the goat's power to cause confusion, then put on a short act, behaving like the lamb again.
Since our egos were mixed in an exact fifty-fifty split, I could produce an effect akin to multiple personalities if I set my mind to it.
...Not that I couldn't have pulled off something like this even if I were just the goat.
After that, I manipulated the status window, broke the rules, and forced a level-up.
The 'status window' was also a bizarre mystery that made 'Heaven' free.
Thus, it was originally a domain that even I could not easily touch without going through the 'my heaven' I had prepared in advance.
But since Heaven broke its own rules first this time, I was able to directly manipulate the status window as well.
From the outside, it would look as though the child had leveled up on her own for some unknown reason and escaped the crisis.
This would suffice.
Someone once said:
To be born is to be subordinated.
And to be observed is to be bound.
Yet, sometimes, a false observation can blur one's true essence instead.
So, I induced a false observation just now.
Can a black goat become a lamb simply by putting on a lamb's disguise?
In the end, what lies inside is merely a goat.
...If I had worn the 'perfect lamb's disguise' and never taken it off, perhaps I could have remained a lamb.
It is already too late.
Though we have separated now, if I were to express it like the lamb... haha!
I suppose I could say, "I'm a black goat, lamb."
...Not anymore.
I was a black goat from the very beginning, not a lamb.
Now, I have made them observe me as 'the black goat's lamb.'
Instead of a goat wearing a lamb's disguise, I tricked them into believing an evil goat dwells within a lamb's heart.
The goat and the lamb are essentially the same, but outwardly, they have been transformed into the 'wicked black goat' and 'my lamb.'
Now, she will strive to draw out the evil goat hiding within the lamb's heart.
By exploiting the chaos of this timeline, it can be fully achieved using only the power of mortals, even if it takes some effort.
In the process, the lamb will gain sufficient happiness and strength, and when the time comes, a perfect separation for the Great Work will be possible once more.
Now that the separation was complete, I handed the body back to the lamb's ego and hid deep within.
......
.....
....
...
..
.
Since the separation is fully complete, I will call you 'Sister' again.
Though gender and age are meaningless to me now since I am no longer human, you are still my 'Sister.'
I am sorry for what just happened. This is the only way I can communicate with others now.
Do not forgive me. I am trying to change, but it is not going as well as I hoped.
I am called a free existence, but in truth, I am not free at all.
An immense amount of time has passed, but I still could not bear to watch you die.
You are my one and only exception.
Many hardships will lie ahead for 'the me who became the lamb,' who has now become 'my lamb.'
Please, protect that child.
...Just as you did for me.