There Is a Nuclear Weapon Living in the Paeng Clan
"Tch tch tch... Young'uns these days—anyone can see they were coddled rotten. Fragile as wet paper, the lot of you..."
"Th-that's... not true."
Still, whether thanks to the Saber King sparing her face out of courtesy for a lady, Namgung Han stood there looking comparatively unscathed—while I, panda-like, sported two eyes swollen into fat chestnut lumps.
If anything, the truly outrageous part was the Saber King, moments earlier...
"Heh heh... Muyeong my boy, since you don't take up a weapon, I'll meet you with these fists of mine."
"Oh? Hmm... if it's fists, then I daresay I can manage—"
WHAM—
"W-wait, hold on—"
"And when you cross blades with the demon-born or the vermin of the Unorthodox Sects someday, will you cry 'hold on' then as well, eh? Come now—give it your best."
And off he went, haw-hawing all the while, thrashing me bare-handed.
Each strike was, in principle, a mere fist, yet every one landed like a blow from a meat tenderizer, and I couldn't hold my senses together.
Flop!
And so, with that deeply artificial final utterance, I kissed the dirt face-first.
At the sorry sight of me, the Saber King clicked his tongue yet again...
"Young'uns these days have grown nothing but crafty—fake a swoon the moment things get a mite difficult. Back in my day, any lad who tried such tricks got beaten straight through into a real faint..."
...so he grumbled—but I was playing dead for all I was worth.
Naturally, such half-witted tricks were never going to fool a Profound Realm master who had already half-shed the shell of mere humanity.
"Youn' rascal, that'll do—up on your feet now."
"Yes sir!"
At the old man's word I scrambled upright in a flash, then darted over to sit meekly beside Namgung Han—who had, at some point, already risen to perch primly on the wooden veranda—and thought to myself:
'Hurts. Hurts like an absolute bastard... and here I'm Transcendent Realm, technically... Shit, no wonder they treat Profound Realm like a walking nuke.'
Why clearing had been a certainty the moment I pushed the Heavenly Demon to the Realm of Life and Death in Murim Conqueror. Why Qingcheng had been the first to bow its head, even after I openly killed one of their own disciples. Why Namgung Han—no lightweight herself, by any account—and I got mauled like dogs marked for the stew pot, unable to so much as fight back. Every last bit of it came down to that damned power graph.
"Argh! Felled by a mere Third-Rate fighter..."
A Third-Rate fighter, with luck on his side, could take down a Second-Rate one.
"Five of you at once? How despicable!"
Five Second-Rate fighters together could gamble for odds against a First-Rate master.
"Heh heh... so many have gathered. Tsk... I suppose this spot shall be my grave."
A mob of First-Rate fighters swarming together could well bring down a master of the Peak Realm.
But let a Peak Realm warrior struggle however he might, he would be carved apart sword and all by ganggi—against a Transcendent Realm martial artist, he hadn't a prayer...
"The... the mountain is coming down! Everyone, evacuate!!!"
And before a Profound Realm master—one who could shatter mountains and cleave rivers—Transcendent Realm or whatever the hell else meant nothing at all. If you wanted to live, your one and only option was to turn tail and sprint for your miserable life.
Profound Realm masters were, in a word, the Central Plains' own nuclear weapons—a deterrent simply by existing...
'Hhk... you filthy, underhanded world.'
Trapped in a reality where the only remedy for my grievances was to go grind my way into Profound Realm myself, all I could do was force down the tears rising in my chest and mourn my lot.
And while I wallowed in that misery, Namgung Han took one look at my face and clamped her jaw shut, fighting down laughter.
"Khh... kkh... There's a bamboo grove right over there, you know. Why don't you go pull yourself up some bamboo shoots to eat?"
"Please, just shut up..."
"Tch tch... young'uns these days, fragile as glass... honestly now."
Somehow the Saber King had already come strolling back, tongue clicking, hands clasped behind him, wearing that neighborhood-grandpa face of his again. He settled down beside me and asked:
"By the by, Muyeong my boy..."
"Yes, Elder? What is it?"
"Hmm... you use your inner energy in a mighty strange way, don't you?"
At those words I went rigid for a moment...
"You're plainly standing at the threshold of Transcendent Realm, that much is certain—but the way you wield that inner energy..."
Gulp.
"It's as though someone else were borrowing the body of a warrior who had only just set foot in Transcendent Realm."
His words struck the truth so squarely that my brain briefly short-circuited.
'Shit... what tipped him off? I'm pretty sure I didn't use anything weird...'
With half my composure in shards, I was mentally retracing every single thing I'd done earlier when the Saber King spoke again.
"It's as if some existence at Profound Realm... no, perhaps something beyond it altogether, were working martial arts through a body at Transcendent Realm. It simply doesn't sit right with me, I tell you..."
"Elder, whatever do you mean by that?"
It was a story only Namgung Han failed to grasp, and she asked it with a deeply furrowed brow.
"Did you not watch with your own eyes how that boy Muyeong uses his inner energy? Transcendent Realm, at its heart, is a realm where one must bring the human body—a microcosm, a small universe unto itself—entirely under one's command..."
"But... it is a realm, isn't it?"
"That boy, how shall I put it..."
"How shall you put it?"
Paeng Juhon stroked his beard and wrestled with the words a good while before slowly opening his mouth.
"Hard to put into words, but... if I told you his body falls far short of his enlightenment, would that give you the rough shape of it?"
"That can't be... isn't Transcendent Realm supposed to be reachable only when mind, qi, and body fall perfectly into alignment?"
"That is precisely why I say it makes no sense. How is such a thing even possible..."
As the Saber King's deductions edged closer and closer to the mark, I clutched my head and put on a fine show of agonizing over the puzzle.
Then, after a leisurely cup of tea's worth of time had passed, I opened my mouth slowly, wearing my most serious face.
"Elder Saber King... can I trust you to keep a secret?"
"I'll stake my very name on it."
Wearing a face as grave as though I were about to betray the Dang Clan's deepest state secrets, I begged his discretion—and Paeng Juhon, caught up in the mood, matched me with a solemn expression of his own...
"Whew... then would you kindly raise a sound-sealing barrier, so that big sister here may hear none of it?"
"Hey! That's cheating....."
Barely had the words left my mouth before the barrier the old man unfurled wrapped itself around the two of us and severed us from the world.
Never mind that outside it, Namgung Han was left flapping her mouth soundlessly, thumping her fists against the barrier...
"Elder, the truth of the matter is..."
Paying her no mind whatsoever, I began, slow and deliberate.
"I, you see..."
Tap—
"I am, in truth, one called Dang Cue—he who served as head of the Dang Clan a very, very long time ago."
"Dang... Cue?"
"That's right. Though I honestly couldn't tell you how I came to settle into this young fellow's body..."
"Are you jerking your elders around, you whelp?"
WHACK—
"AAAGH! Elder! What will you do if you hammer my head and I get even dumber than I already am!"
My skull clamped fast in the Saber King's grip, I glared up at him with all the grievance I could muster, while Paeng Juhon—barrier already dismissed—muttered with a face full of disgust.
"Aigoo... rotten little punk. If you didn't want to tell me, you should've just said so! You might as well have claimed some immortal out of the celestial realm had happened to possess you!"
"Elder, it was merely a tiny prank, in honor of your birthday..."
"One more round of congratulations and I'll work myself into a genuine illness. The sun's nearly down—both of you head back to your lodgings."
At those words I glanced up to find the sky already burning with dusk.
At the Saber King's send-off, the two of us bowed, turned, and made our exit.
"So what in the world did you two talk about, that it ended with you taking a smack?"
Even now, Namgung Han kept pressing questions on me, dying of curiosity over the one conversation she'd been locked out of.
"I'm the reincarnation of the First Cheonma—greatest genius the Central Plains has ever produced."
"Aigoo, enough with the nonsense and tell it to me straight."
"Actually, I'm the reincarnation of the Buddha..."
"Honestly now... how many times must I say it—quit your jesting!"
Like sword and shield, Namgung Han and I bickered back and forth as we walked.
"Really, must it come to this? Keep it up, and I'll shadow you every step until you tell me."
"Oh, come on... I already told you. I'm the reincarnation of Bodhidharma."
Just as I was scowling in exasperation at Namgung Han's dogged persistence about our earlier conversation—
a white-clad figure I recognized was approaching me from far down the road.
"Baekhwa...?"
"So it is true. To think our A-woo had such a lovely fiancée hidden away..."
At the sight of Jegal Baekhwa walking toward us, Namgung Han stopped mid-sentence, turned to me, and wore a sinister smile.
"A-woo, this is your final chance. Speak now, and I may yet let it slide."
"What kind of nonsense is that...!!!"
With those words as her parting shot, she pressed herself against me, latching onto my arm—and though I shrieked in horror at the sight, she only went on grinning viciously, arm hooked through mine...
"My lord...?"
By now Jegal Baekhwa had drawn near enough that I could read her face clearly—and her eyes had begun to go lifeless, like a dead fish's.
Thoroughly familiar with this situation, I ground my teeth and spoke to Namgung Han in a low voice.
"Yew... sonnuvabitch...."
"I gave you a fair chance, A-woo—and it was you who trampled it underfoot, was it not?"
"Yew... ungra—teful sonnuvabitch!"
"My lord, why must you show me such a sight yet again..."
Just then, Baekhwa closed the last of the distance and spoke to me.
Tap—
"Baekhwa, my girl—kept well all this while?"
Only then did Namgung Han release my arm, spreading both her arms wide as she moved to embrace Baekhwa.
"Do not touch me."
Cooly deflecting Namgung Han's arms, she continued:
"I have nothing to say to the Young Clan Head of Namgung."
"Y-Young Clan Head of Namgung? Why ever would you not call me sister..."
Having sunk Namgung Han with a single sentence, Baekhwa turned an icy stare on me.
"It's been a while. I missed you so much."
I spread my arms as well, moving to embrace her.
Fwump—
Jegal Baekhwa buried herself against me, then lifted her head from within my arms and looked up at me with eyes that said an explanation was owed...
"It's all a misunderstanding. I know exactly what you're thinking... but it's all a misunderstanding. Every bit of it. I can explain."
..........
"Big sister saw you coming and played a little prank to tease you—that's all this was. Right, big sister?"
Even as I pleaded my case for all I was worth, I mouthed at Namgung Han: 'I'll fill you in later, so just play along for now.'
Thankfully, she had at least that much sense.
"Our A-woo speaks nothing but the truth. I merely pulled a little jest, all to tease our darling Baekhwa."
..........
"Would I lie to you? Why would I even bother? Honestly, the only reason I was with big sister at all is that the Elder Saber King summoned us—we just stopped by for a moment and were on our way back together."
"Hoo... I naturally believe you, my lord."
Had my heartfelt pleading and sincere eyes reached her at last? Fortunately, life had returned to Baekhwa's eyes, and I breathed a sigh of relief before saying:
"Haah... by the way, did the Zhuge Clan only just arrive?"
"Yes. The moment we arrived I went looking for you, my lord, and they told me you had gone to see the Elder, so I was just on my way there myself..."
"A mercy we didn't walk right past each other, then. Come—let's go find something to eat."
"Yes....."
When I took her hand, her cheeks flushed shy, and I led her off, quickening our pace...
"A-woo! Make room for me as well!"
"If you follow us, I will never call you sister again for as long as I live!"
"Baekhwa!!!"
Leaving Namgung Han to stand there like a forsaken memorial stone, I paid her no further heed and hurried us along.
Meanwhile, at that very moment, the Saber King was stroking his beard, turning the story he had just heard over in his mind once more.
"Dang Cue, was it... certainly a name I've never heard before..."
He closed his eyes and pondered deeply for a time before muttering with a low hum.
"Hmm... either way, I'll have to look into it."