Even Dragons Are Equal Before the Head (3)
Yuhan was descending from the arena.
I lost.
No matter how many times he replayed it, it had been utterly pathetic. Losing like this actually brought a strange sense of relief.
What was I so greedy for? What did I think I had going for me?
"Let's leave now."
He no longer had the face to see his master, nor the dignity to stand before his senior brothers as the sect's top disciple.
In one corner of the waiting room sat a simple bundle of belongings. Yuhan had packed them before the match even began, intending to depart immediately if he lost.
Yuhan picked up the bundle and slipped out of the waiting room without a backward glance.
But he hadn't gone far when his steps halted.
An old man stood in his path.
"Were you really planning to leave without seeing your master even once?"
Yuhan couldn't bring himself to lift his head and meet his master's eyes. He kept it bowed low as he replied.
"I don't have the right."
Jaming Jin-in had hurried to the waiting room exit the moment the match ended. He knew Yuhan well enough to guess he'd try to slip away alone again.
Why does he have to be so soft-hearted yet so stubbornly responsible?
It was praise, not criticism. A wry smile tugged at his lips unbidden. It was regret for his own failure to teach the boy that he didn't have to shoulder every burden alone.
"Then this time, I'll come with you."
At that, Yuhan's head snapped up.
Meeting his disciple's eyes after so long, Jaming Jin-in brushed off the brief awkwardness and spoke.
"Er... um... Hand over that baggage. It's been ages since I last went traveling."
Before becoming sect leader, he and Yuhan had occasionally set out on trips together—not frequently, but now and then. They'd even visited Namgung Daeso's place once a year.
"......"
"Don't want to travel with your master?"
Awkwardness and worry flickered across Jaming Jin-in's face again.
What came back wasn't an answer or refusal, but his disciple's sharp voice.
"What about Huashan Sect?"
Yuhan knew full well how much his master loved Huashan.
This wasn't what he'd wanted. He hadn't come here to be a burden to his master.
I just... wanted to be of help.
If it was for Huashan, he was ready to devote his life to it. It was the first real home he'd ever had.
But this situation? Far from helping Huashan, it looked like everything was falling apart.
And yet his master was smiling brightly.
"I stepped down. Heh heh."
His master shrugged as if it were no big deal, giving the illusion that he'd truly washed his hands of it all.
Even if that were true, it wouldn't lighten Yuhan's heart.
"Because... of me?"
"No, because of me. And now, I want to."
Jaming Jin-in had long known he wasn't cut out to be Huashan's leader. Yet he'd clung to the position anyway.
The root of it all? His own greed. An excuse dressed up as devotion to the sect.
He'd turned a blind eye to it.
"I'm sorry for all this time. For making you carry my burdens."
For placing needless weight on his disciple's shoulders.
Regret welled up, but he kept it from his face. He'd regretted enough already.
From now on, they'd fill the gaps together, one by one.
Just like the old days.
Whether Yuhan would allow it was another matter...
"Pretend I didn't hear that. Go back. I don't want to be your burden."
"Where would I go now?"
"You really came out?!"
It had been ages since he'd seen his disciple this furious.
Why did it take me so long to realize?
Huashan had been his entire life. But serving it didn't require being sect leader.
This child had left Huashan, yet no one cared for him and the sect more.
"You're teaching me yet another lesson."
The heart mattered. Not the place or position.
Hadn't this boy proven it proudly on the arena stage?
Staking everything outside of Huashan.
How could such an exemplary disciple's master act like a fool?
"Don't change the subject!"
"Shall we ask Namgung Clan to take us in? We could beg Daeso."
"Master!"
At Yuhan's shout, Jaming Jin-in only smiled more brightly.
"Perfect."
He'd already seen two new sides to Yuhan today.
"I'm serious! I'm not in the mood for jokes!"
"So am I."
"Haa... Fuck, you're impossible!"
Ho! Make that three!
Yuhan cursing so colorfully? That was a first.
In the old days, he'd have scolded the boy harshly for such crude words from a Daoist. But Jaming Jin-in just chuckled again.
"What was that 'fuck'? Should your master learn a curse or two?"
"Argh, seriously! Master!"
"I'm old, but my ears still work fine. Anyway, it's nice hearing 'Master' after so long."
Yuhan felt like he might lose his mind and jump around.
His master really seemed to have left Huashan for good.
As if reading his thoughts with ghostly intuition, his master spoke up.
"No need to worry."
Unlike his earlier playful tone, this was the true voice of his master from long ago—reassuring and steadfast.
Yuhan looked at Jaming Jin-in.
His master was smiling again.
That smile always weakened Yuhan's resolve. It was the first true kindness he'd ever received from the world.
"From now on, I won't leave you alone again. You've suffered because of your worthless master... I'm sorry."
"I'm not over it yet."
"I figured! That's why I snuck this along. Even as a kid, you'd pout like this, but one candy and you'd be fine."
Yuhan wanted to say he wasn't a child anymore.
But nostalgia for that old taste kept him silent.
Jaming Jin-in pulled something from his robes.
Not candy... but a bottle of liquor.
"Hm... Wrong one."
Yuhan yelled at the sight.
"You still drink?! I told you it's bad for your health!"
"Well... it just wets the lips on lonely days."
"Haa... Give me that bottle."
Jaming Jin-in handed it over with trembling hands.
Yuhan promptly poured it on the ground.
"No booze until you're healthy."
What could he say? It was sound advice.
Jaming Jin-in smacked his lips and rummaged again, finally pulling out what he wanted.
"Here it is. Take it."
Not candy this time either.
A small Hwandan wrapped in black paper.
"Not candy?"
"Pfft, you're not a kid."
Jaming Jin-in continued excitedly, utterly shameless.
"I've served Huashan all this time. It'd feel wrong to leave empty-handed, so I took one."
In other words...
"You stole it?"
"Daoists don't steal. They borrow temporarily."
Same difference.
Yuhan suddenly recalled something Namgung Daeso often said about his master.
—"Hey, Daoist grandpa."
—"Master?"
—"Yeah. Total quack."
"So what is this?"
Just one of the pills rolling around Huashan, probably.
"Jaso Dan."
Yuhan's hand froze mid-tear of the paper.
He looked up at Jaming Jin-in.
His hand trembled.
"What. Did. You. Just. Say. This. Is?"
His tone burned with fury.
Unaware or uncaring, Jaming Jin-in launched into his tale with vigor.
"I was the sect leader, after all. So I snuck in and grabbed a few!"
Hm? Did I hear that wrong?
Yuhan couldn't outright frisk his master, so he asked tentatively.
"That 'few' aren't all Jaso Dan, right?"
Jaming Jin-in rummaged again and pulled out three more identical pills.
"All but one."
"For real! Master! Please!"
"Why? Should've taken them all?"
"No, that's not what I mean! Do you even know how important these are?!"
"Yuhan, you're more important than any pill. For you, I'd dive into fire. So just for today, the booze..."
—"He's not a quack! Master's the best Daoist!"
—"That's what people say who don't know him. You know him better than anyone."
—"N-no, that's not..."
—"He is! Totally!"
—"I-I should say no... Damn it, he's a quack!"
That's when the Huashan elders, led by Grand Elder Haemu, burst in, panting like they'd run flat out.
It spoke to their urgency.
Yuhan squeezed his eyes shut.
Jaming Jin-in boldly stepped in front of him.
Argh, seriously! Master, don't be pointlessly heroic!
"Don't worry. I'll protect you!"
This time, it was embarrassment that kept Yuhan from meeting his eyes.
"We've been waiting."
"Me?"
Namgung Daeso spoke politely to the woman. She was a stranger, after all.
The woman hesitated, unsure how to respond to his deference.
Her sisters had assured her the youngest young master would take the lead.
Jegal Sua didn't panic. She'd been trained for awkward moments too.
—"The young master loves heads!"
—"Headbutters! Got it?"
—"Thick skulls!"
He'd first seen Jegal Sua on the preliminary arena stage.
No makeup, hair tied back tight, simple martial robes.
Second time: at the betting table, red headband and all, much the same.
This was their real third meeting, aside from that quick glimpse.
Her hair was now beautifully unbound.
Ilhyang and the others had dolled her up right after the match: fresh jacket and skirt, light makeup.
A simple change.
But on Hobuk's top beauty, it transformed her completely.
With Namgung Daeso saying nothing, Jegal Sua steeled herself.
She'd arranged this. She wanted to thank him sincerely—not as a disposable woman, but as a person.
He definitely likes heads... not the smashing kind, hair!
The headbutter uncles had said so too. If things got awkward, offer your head!
The mood would melt from there!
Jegal Sua bowed her head gracefully toward Namgung Daeso.
Just for today!
I eyed the prettiest woman I'd ever seen with puzzlement.
Is she nuts?
She stared, greeted me, then thrust her crown at me.
Eyes squeezed shut, she said,
"Go ahead—just for today, do whatever!"
Whatever what?
First the madman, now the madwoman. Time for an exorcism?
Then she smacked her own occiput.
Tap-tap!
I just stood there, baffled.
She looked up, puzzled.
Nodded to herself, then bowed again and smacked harder.
Smack-smack-smack!
Crazy bitch.
Such a pretty face, yet I pitied her.
Out of sympathy for her poor head's misfortune, I stroked it.
Finally feeling Namgung Daeso's touch, Jegal Sua tensed up.
It's coming!
But no headbutt flew.
Instead, a gentle hand caressed her hair.
Wh-what do I do...?
First time for this.
Her face burned; she couldn't lift her head.
Smooth strokes.
She melted like spring snow.
But how long...?
H-how long are you gonna pet me...?
Sprinkle-sprinkle.
Spring breeze blowing.
Spring arrived in Jegal Sua's heart.