When Did This Love Begin?
Ethan von Astell stared quietly at the red wooden ceiling above him.
‘A variable has appeared.’
Eleanor’s reaction had been far more dramatic than he expected. If it had been the Eleanor he knew, she would have accepted the annulment pledge with calm composure. Instead, she wore a face full of hurt.
Only then did he realize this was the first time something like this had ever happened.
In all his previous regressions, he had never once asked her to break the engagement first or distanced himself from her. He had always tried to stay by her side.
And yet…
“…Why?”
Knock. Knock.
“Prince, I’m sorry to disturb you.”
Lia opened the door and set the teacup on the table.
“Ethan.”
“Yes, Prince.”
“During the two weeks remaining until the academy entrance ceremony, do not let anyone enter my room. Have meals placed outside the door.”
Lia froze, startled.
“Excuse me? Even if Her Highness or Prince Chris summons me, I am not to let them in?”
“Yes. I am tired. I do not wish to meet anyone.”
“…Understood. I will convey to Duke Astell that your health is not well.”
Unconsciously, his hand reached for the teacup, then halted. The familiar scent of tea filled the air. The tea Eleanor liked best, infused with the flowers she favored.
“From now on, bring a different tea.”
He spoke those words with the intention of completely severing every connection he had with Eleanor. He did not want it to appear as if he still harbored any lingering attachment.
“…Although it shames me to say so, I cannot obey that order.”
“Why?”
“That is…”
For the first time, Lia’s strange behavior caught his attention. She hesitated, lips trembling, before slowly continuing.
“Previously… I told you it was flowers I had picked from the garden, but that was a lie. This tea was personally gifted to Lady Eleanor.”
Ethan stopped moving and stared at the teacup.
‘…A gift?’
He searched his memory, but no immediate answer surfaced.
“…From now on, bring a different tea.”
He withdrew his gaze as if it were nothing and set the teacup down. Lia immediately fell silent and bowed deeply.
“…I will remember.”
The moment the door closed, Ethan quietly looked at the hand that had stopped.
‘…Why did I stop?’
Too many memories had been crammed into his mind.
During nine lives, the goodwill and malice he had received had become hopelessly intertwined. Who had given what had long since settled into the past.
‘Ah, now that I think about it…’
It had been on some day in the first regression. Eleanor had handed him something with an unhappy expression. That was all. Digging deeper felt too tiring.
In the past, he had never abandoned her. If she was weak, he helped. If she asked for help, he ran to her from anywhere.
The regressions twisted. Fate twisted. And because of her, he had suffered many times.
Could one sentence—that the past him had once liked this woman—truly erase everything?
“…It means nothing.”
As he recalled the memories, his brows furrowed. Even if he had grown dull, nothing remained from reliving the past. No matter the reason, it was something that would not be entangled in the future.
‘The academy entrance ceremony where all the imperial nobles gather…’
He had overheard rumors drifting through the mansion. Eleanor had said she would set the timing of the annulment then.
A public annulment.
It was a disgrace for the Astell family. Duke Astell and Chris would unleash their fury upon him, and his standing within the family would be shattered.
“Are you still doubting?”
If he widened the board, the frightened him would cancel the annulment first. An F-rank magic aptitude person suddenly throwing away the pledge scraps out of inferiority complex—once the board was widened and she was frightened, she would eventually kneel. That was his belief.
Then Eleanor could savor the arrogant victory of having held overwhelming dominance in their engagement and being able to say, “You ungrateful wretch dared to try to break the relationship I had given you as a favor first.”
That was her plan.
Meanwhile, inside a luxurious carriage returning from the Astell main residence to the Rosenberg ducal estate, Eleanor von Rosenberg stared blankly out the window at the passing scenery. On her lap lay the annulment pledge Ethan had handed her.
The pledge, its red seal now wrinkled from her tight grip earlier.
‘…Ethan von Astell.’
The man’s gaze still lingered in her mind.
Opposite him, the elderly butler Helmut frowned and spoke.
“Do you truly intend to announce the annulment with this pledge at the academy entrance ceremony? I strongly recommend reconsidering.”
“What is the reason for your objection, Helmut?”
Eleanor looked at the butler. Helmut continued without shrinking back.
“Although the political marriage with the Astell family was an unfair contract, it served as an important political shield for the Rosenberg family—to check the northern forces and avoid the imperial eye. Considering both the estate’s practicality and reputation, breaking the marriage with the Astell at this point would be more loss than gain. Moreover, if we publicly declare the annulment first, Duke Astell will likely launch a retaliatory political offensive, staking the family’s pride. It would be far better to quietly settle it behind the scenes while securing practical benefits…”
“Enough.”
Eleanor cut him off coldly.
“Political practicality? A shield? Such calculations become meaningless the moment I secure first place at the academy and the imperial’s dazzling support. The gain I obtain by entangling myself with the Astell family is far smaller than the justification to wipe that place away.”
“…However.”
“After all, because our family was bound by that troublesome ‘debt of life’ we lost to the Astell family in the distant past, the unfair contract I maintained through forced sacrifice. We can discard it as a one-sided request from the other side without needing to refuse.”
“Miss…”
“Stop. Helmut. This is a decision.”
“…Understood.”
Watching the retreating butler, Eleanor carefully wrapped her wrist. The spot where Ethan’s cold temperature had touched remained oddly troubling.
In the eyes that had looked at her, there had been no trace of inferiority or anger.
Only accumulated fatigue. The eyes of a man who wanted to throw away the engagement he had once given as a favor in exchange for the family’s debt, as if it were worth nothing.
Eleanor tightened her hand around her wrist, then slowly relaxed it.
She had believed she was sacrificing to repay the debt, yet why did that incompetent man throw away his freedom first, as if he were granting her a favor?
“Butler.”
“Yes, Miss.”
“Reconduct the investigation into Ethan von Astell.”
“Are you serious? If the fact that I attached a spy is discovered, it will not end with an apology.”
“It is fine. The other side has already discarded Ethan. Even if some noise arises, they will not interfere.”
Eleanor picked up the annulment pledge and neatly folded it into her bosom.
“Investigate who he has met recently, what actions he has taken, what has happened within the family… Leave nothing out. Even the smallest change is fine.”
“…Understood. I will send people secretly.”
As the carriage entered the ducal estate’s gate, Eleanor opened the window and welcomed the cold wind. Her head cooled. Eleanor smiled faintly.
She was looking forward to it.
The sight of Ethan, mask peeled away, pleading in front of everyone at the academy to think again just once more.
At the same time, in the Astell main residence study, Duke Astell took an old wooden box from deep within the desk drawer and placed it on the desk. The box was covered in white dust. The lid remained unopened.
Knock. Knock.
Before the knocking had even finished, the door opened roughly. The heir Chris strode into the study. His face was twisted with anger and irritation.
“You called, Father.”
Instead of answering, the Duke tapped a sheet of paper on the corner of the desk with his finger. The meal and supply distribution ledger that had arrived from the kitchen that morning.
“…You did this.”
Chris’s eyebrows twitched.
“I do not understand what you are talking about.”
“I never ordered you to imprison that man in the room.”
“Then will you continue to leave that child who sent the annulment request without even a word of consultation?”
The Duke’s cold gaze made Chris step forward, leaning on the desk with bloodshot eyes.
“Father! Why didn’t you kick that kid out long ago? How long are you going to keep that disgrace and burden of the family? If you want political benefits from the marriage with Rosenberg, isn’t it enough with me instead of that trash Ethan? No, originally, who left that arrogant woman to ignore our family?”
“Chris!”
Bang!
The Duke slammed his palm on the desk, leaving a heavy crack across the oak surface.
“Who are you shouting in front of right now!”
The air in the study froze instantly. Chris’s breath was momentarily choked by the pressure, yet he glared at his father with gritted teeth, unwilling to back down.
“Is it wrong? Because of that guy, our Astell has been crawling while watching Rosenberg’s eyes! Now he’s running around saying he’ll break the engagement himself—why do we have to clean up that idiot’s mess? If you drag him out and beat him, or erase his family register from the family, it would save my face, wouldn’t it!”
The Duke looked down at his son, panting roughly, with cynical eyes. Chris did not know.
Why the Astell family had tolerated Rosenberg’s arrogant attitude and maintained the deformed engagement until now.
The Duke’s gaze naturally drifted to the desk and the old wooden box.
‘The night of Rosenberg…’
A hundred years ago, the rampage of the great magician that shook the empire, and the deadly bloodline secret that Rosenberg had to hide behind it.
The Astell had held the clue to that weakness, allowing them to bind the family with their power until now.
Chris, who was to become the next head of the family, had never known that Ethan was the only ‘shield and shackle’ of that vicious political marriage.
“Who do you think you are talking big?”
The voice was lower than the earlier shout.
“That kid… I will handle it myself. As soon as the engagement ends at the academy entrance ceremony, every remnant related to Ethan will be erased from our family forever. So do not think of doing unnecessary things with that shallow head of yours. If you touch that kid without my order one more time, your successor position will not be safe either.”
Chris bit his lips until they bled. His entire body trembled with anger, yet under the Duke’s fierce pressure, he had no choice but to grit his teeth and lower his gaze to the floor.
“…Understood. As Father wishes.”
Chris turned sharply and roughly opened the study door, then left.
Bang! The door slammed shut as if it would fly off its hinges. Even after it closed, the study remained unsettled for a long time.
The Duke sat alone before the desk, then quietly slid the old wooden box down.