Witches Are All Childish
"Aren't all dungeons usually like this?!"
"You can do it, junior! Fighting!!"
"Screw it!!! Wiyu Breath!!!!"
After getting my Tamer Junior certification, I started seriously dungeon crawling to rack up achievements.
They seemed to be sending me into super dangerous dungeons by exploiting the fact that ignorance is bliss—making me strong in a way.
But if I grilled them and figured it out, I'd just get scared, which would be a loss. So I just fought like an idiot, brain off, thinking, Hey, if I win, that's that!
Against monsters, I didn't even need to hold back, so I spewed fire, spewed water, and beat the crap out of them.
Once, I fell into some dark space, and what I thought was the moon floating in the sky came at me—that freaked me out a bit.
But it was still less scary than your average zombie swinging some mystery grinder from who-knows-where.
I wondered if this was even right... but fear's all relative, right?
Anyway, as long as I cleared it, job done.
"That wraps up the schedule... enjoy the rest of break!"
"Yay!!"
"What about break homework?"
"Left it to No.1."
"You... treat her right, okay..."
I bragged to Kaoru-senpai that as her master, I was properly rewarding No.1—she'd finished my homework and asked for a vacation, so I gave her one.
Kaoru-senpai muttered something about whether vacation even meant anything to her, but whatever!
With the schedule done, we all got together for an all-night feast and booze party.
Of course, I didn't drink—Kaoru-senpai snatched it away, saying I'd go berserk.
"I've got some time... and Grand Duke said it's fine... maybe I should go see Aunt Merlen."
Shed just replied that she was hunkered down in Sword City Arista on purpose.
I felt a pang of regret—couldn't I have met her last time I visited?
But whatever, I could just go now.
I opened the drawer and unhesitatingly chugged the [Man-ifying Potion] I'd been keeping safe.
"Ooh... oh...!!"
I felt my fingers lengthening, arms stretching, viewpoint rising as my whole body transformed.
I swept my newly long hair aside and checked my face in the mirror.
"...Was I this ugly?"
It still felt a bit feminine... worried, I checked my pants—yep, fully male.
For a moment, I was thrilled to see Junior again...
But then Grand Duke's words popped into my head.
This potion will turn you male, but you'll revert to female soon enough.
Spotty said Mom gave me a potion that could make me fully male forever.
But Grand Duke said my witch powers were so ridiculously strong I'd surpassed Mom, and even she couldn't fix it now.
Like punching a hole in a dam—this potion was just a wooden board patch at best.
...And he held back, but there were more secrets, so I decided to enjoy this fleeting moment.
With effort, maybe I could turn male for good someday.
Positive thinking...!
"Grand Duke said he'd work on my scores during break... but I'd rather he just stayed by my side."
Curious what he was up to? Nah.
I tried on my usual clothes—they were baggy as hell, except too short top and bottom... but the looseness felt amazing.
Should I bring a sword? Nah, just heading to a nearby city.
Still, male for the first time in ages, so I drew it, swung a few times lightly, then sheathed it.
"Feels weird being suddenly free."
We'd been rushing non-stop, squeezing in sleep to keep up—now with free time, the foggy-brain feeling wouldn't quit.
Hands in pockets, I strolled, watching academy kids chatter by the holy sword.
The inter-academy exchange was soon—wonder what chaos it'd bring.
Would Mom show up?
Oh yeah, I sent a letter—hope she got it.
Lost in thoughts, I stopped in front of a monstrously huge grocery store.
Even back home, she ran a big shop... but this? Six stories? All Aunt Merlen's...?
What if not? Peeking nervously, I knocked.
A woman with snow-white hair, glasses, faint wrinkles—rushed out like she'd been waiting.
"Who is it~? If it isn't our Wiyu~"
"Eubup!"
Aunt Merlen hugged me like a girl with a teddy bear, swung me around once.
"What a shame~ I wanted to see girl Wiyu! She'd be cute and lovable like Aris! This kid's too big—feral ugly now~"
"Euuuh..."
She set down my spinning self, then steamrolled with her one-woman chatter.
Old folks get chatty—once she grabs you, three hours minimum. Remembered too late.
"Spotty come too? Got the potion? Aris was so worried~ She said she got your letter! Man... she's a mom now, but still so shy. Asking an unmarried me? Weird, right? But you wouldn't know!! I'm kinda the godmother among witches?"
She waved it off—Women can lie about age~
"The world~ even after all these years, full of surprises~ Aris has a kid, and it's a boy~"
10,000 vs. 40 years... big gap?
Anyway, Aunt Merlen's a witch too... obvious, but hearing it from her felt weird.
And godmother to witches... she's family to me, but this secret scale gave me a headache.
"Oh yeah, you're a girl at academy, right? No ID as a boy, so you're my son now!"
"Huh?"
"Made an ID for my cute son! From today, you're [Tendo Poppins]!"
"Huh???"
"Call me Mom! Mom! Wanna hear it!"
"M-my opinion...?"
No chance to speak—she rapid-fired it.
More importantly, how'd she make this ID? My male face was on it.
Two sides—back had girl me as Wiyu Witchcraft.
Wait... I'm originally male, so does this trap me as female forever...?
"Fix it later! No biggie! I cleaned up Aris's mess, so I get a cute son too!"
"Uh, well... we're like family, so no issue... but I only have one mom."
"That's what I like! How'd Aris make such a kid?"
She laughed heartily—All witches are childish, forgive us.
I was born male, so even as girl, I lack innate femininity—unavoidable difference... cryptic stuff.
But we could chat leisurely later, she said, chattering on.
By the way, shop door still closed—I've been stuck at the entrance for an hour.
"Hid you're a witch—shocked me. But she has reasons."
"I see..."
"Oh! Wiyu! Know this? Our family swapped marriage talks once? Hehe... 1,700 years ago? I raised a hamster-like kid who founded a house. He said marry my daughter-like Aris to expand it—ambitious! But Aris was teen then! Brushed it off—Think kids later—bet she forgot?"
"1,700 years..."
Whoever the hamster kid was, probably dead by the metaphor.
"Still, generations kept ties—even hero party acquaintances... Wondered if you were really born girl~ Oh well!"
"Huh?"
"Even if 1,700-year-old promise, a promise is a promise! As their godmother... and you're girl!!"
"Um... too fast, I can't follow..."
So, ancient witch Aunt Merlen picked up a "human," raised him like a hamster—grew attached, became godmother for 1,700 years.
Even back in village, she sent my cheeses to the house, keeping ties.
Child-like Aris + child-like house(?) making a kid would seal the bond perfectly.
"But if you stay boy? Male witches live human lifespans."
"Getting heavy suddenly..."
"Bright talk then!! Took 1,700 years, but family promise—you have a fiancée! Wanted to introduce someday—now's time!"
Whoa, don't railroad like that—I'm lost!
Grandma-level promise even Mom forgot... no, Aunt Merlen nurtured this match herself?
"Come out, cutie? Surprise! Godmother has a cool son! Tendo-kun!"
"Huh...?"
"Come on!"
The mystery person inside sounded deflated—shocked too.
Makes sense... Mom takes after Aunt Merlen.
How'd she hide this childish side... scary, witches...!
While thinking, she stepped aside—door opened.
Fiancée out of nowhere—awkward for both, I tensed up.
Door opened.
Why's the top student here?
"Now, greet! This is Tendo Poppins! And this is~ Ephemera Flash!"
Time froze—choking—wishing it stopped.
Top student extended her hand.
"Didn't know godmother had a son."
"...Me neither."
We shook, smiling—inside, I wanted to faint.
What face do I make at academy when I revert...?