I Hate Going to the Hospital!
Kwon Seah does not want to go to the hospital!
If you asked me how much I knew about being a woman, I knew everything they taught in sex education.
So, in other words, nothing beyond that.
There was no way I could know.
"Uuuh... if I just search online, I should at least find something useful."
If you’re sick, the right answer is to go to the hospital, sure...
But if women were supposed to change their underwear this often as a matter of course, then I’d just be making a fool of myself all alone, wouldn’t I?
I hated that. I really hated it. I just hated it.
[women's underwear... ]
But what was I even supposed to search for?
Would anything even come up?
Ugh, I was so embarrassed I could die. It felt like I was doing perverted research for no reason.
[Is it normal to change women’s underwear often?]
"Oh... huh, something’s coming up?"
Blogs and all kinds of sites appeared.
...No, but why were there so many OB/GYN ads?
A whole pile of search results for women’s clinics and the like popped up.
It looked like obvious advertising, so there was no way I was clicking on those.
[Q. I’m a woman, and I change my underwear often. Is that okay?]
[A. Come heeere!]
[A. I think I can answer if you show me the underwear you changed often.]
[A. It’s difficult to judge accurately from the information provided, so if you visit our clinic... ]
[A. Dirty thoughts make you wet lol]
"Tsk... I thought this site used to have halfway decent information."
There was nothing useful on Knowledge Star, a site I hadn’t visited in ages.
There was so much nonsense I started wondering if they might get sued for sexual harassment.
No, and the people asking the questions were being way too vague, so none of it helped me at all.
[Changing women’s underwear in summer—am I the only one changing too often?]
"Oh... what? Did a woman actually write this? This looks way more helpful, at least."
A little embarrassed, I tapped it quickly.
[Changing women’s underwear in summer—am I the only one changing too often?]
Hello :) Today I want to talk about a slightly sensitive but very curious topic!
Let’s discuss the women’s underwear change cycle!
(A smiling emoji of a pure-white face)
But in summer, since you sweat so much, a lot of people end up changing several times!
Depending on the person, it can be 2 to 3 times!
(A winking emoji of a pure-white face)
If this helped at all, don’t forget to like and leave a comment!
"...That’s not helpful!!!"
A scream burst out before I could stop it.
What was this supposed to be? What kind of information was this?
Of course you’d change if you sweat a lot! What I wanted to know was whether changing three times a day meant something was wrong with my body!
"Was I searching too vaguely?"
I fidgeted with the keyboard using both hands.
I kept typing in embarrassing words, deleting them, typing them again, deleting them again.
"Ggh... still, when I was a guy, I never searched online for where to go if my dick hurt."
...No, wait? Come to think of it, weren’t there plenty of meme screenshots where people joked about their dick hurting, or getting dumped, or nearly ending up with an ice-cold dick?
Now that I thought about it, guys never really spoke delicately when they talked to each other...
"Uh... so what do women even call it?"
...
... ...
"How the hell should I know!"
I shook my head hard from side to side, forcibly clearing the thought that had just popped up.
Anyway! What mattered right now was getting reassurance that my body was normal and that I didn’t need to go to the hospital.
Honestly, going to the OB/GYN was mortifying as hell, but if I had to go anyway, I wanted to go before anything got to the point of surgery.
I wanted to catch it early, go in, take some shots? Pills? Whatever, and be done with it.
"Oh. Huh, this actually looks useful."
[Check this before going to the OB/GYN!]
The article I clicked on as if possessed by a ghost was simple enough.
"You can tell if you’ve got a disease from the liquid on your underwear?"
I had no idea what the mechanism was, but apparently this was common knowledge for women.
"Uh..."
Thinking it might just be complete bullshit, I searched other sites too, and sure enough, it really was a common topic.
It went into embarrassing detail about what color was normal, and that if there was a foul smell, you should go to the OB/GYN.
"Hmm..."
So I checked.
Honestly, all I had to do was pull down what was around my waist and look, so it wasn’t hard at all.
"There’s nothing here?"
It was just plain cotton underwear, wasn’t it?
"No, seriously... what woman looks inside her underwear every time she takes it off? Back when I was a guy... ah."
Oh, right? Women always sit down when they go to the bathroom, so naturally they’d see the inside of their underwear?
"...Even if I say that! I still don’t remember! Ah! This is driving me insane! Am I healthy? I don’t feel pain or stinging, so that means I’m fine, right?!"
Honestly, if it had been hot and bothered or if something like acne had grown there, I’d have thought something was wrong, but because it was just sweat, I had no way of knowing.
What should I do? Should I just treat this like some trivial little incident and pretend it never happened?
If I were still a man, I’d just roughly look with my own two eyes...
"Huh? Oh, I can just look with my own eyes? Why didn’t I think of that?"
If I looked down, all I’d see was my bulging stomach and the black plain below, but humans had tools, didn’t they?
"No need for a mirror~ You’ve got a smartphone in your hand."
Was I a genius?
Instead of agonizing until something showed up on my underwear, I could just look for myself, couldn’t I?
A human body was healthy as long as it wasn’t blazing red or swollen with inflammation or anything!
Whistling, I turned on my smartphone camera and switched it to selfie mode.
"If I do it like this..."
It would be indecently, painfully explicit, but for my health—
"Lady Seah? Lunch is ready..."
"Ah."
Elodie, smiling brightly as she came in, stopped mid-sentence.
And I, sitting on the edge of the bed with my legs spread, froze too.
...She was definitely misunderstanding, wasn’t she?
I had a smartphone between my open legs, and anyone looking would think I was taking a photo of my own body.
No! To someone else, it would look like I was taking a picture, not just looking at something!
"Oh my, my, my..."
"W-wait! Elodie unni! Elodie unni! Don’t think weird things!"
Panicking, I quickly snapped my legs shut and pulled my pants back up over my thighs.
"You’re misunderstanding, unni!"
"Since Lady Seah is a full-grown adult, whatever you may be doing—"
"It’s not that! It’s not that! I’m telling you, it’s not that!!! I’m not a pervert! There’s a reason for thissssss!!!!!"
* * *
Fortunately, Elodie listened to my explanation calmly and all the way through.
I was so embarrassed I felt like I might die from having to explain the whole thing from start to finish.
"Oh my, my... Lady Seah, you really do have the cutest worries."
"I-I was seriously terrified that something had gone wrong with my body, and that if I went to the hospital, what would I do?"
Elodie snorted with laughter.
Meanwhile, I was dying of shame.
"First, let me ease your worries: your body is absolutely not sick."
"Really?"
"Yes. Since I’m the one doing all of your laundry, there’s no way I’d miss any obvious sign of poor health."
Ah, come to think of it, even if I didn’t know, Elodie would know, wouldn’t she?
"...N-no! Wait! Elodie unni! Why are you looking at other people’s panties? And the ones they wore and took off at that!"
"Oh my, we haven’t even known each other for a day or two, and now you’re embarrassed? It’s already been more than two years since I started washing your underwear, you know?"
"Nooo... you never said you looked at it like that. I thought you might kind of, sort of be checking, but hearing you say you were actually checking is a completely different story."
Elodie covered her mouth with her hand and laughed again.
Thankfully, it seemed the old Kwon Seah had never had this conversation with her.
...Well, of course, I guess?
"Anyway... so changing three times isn’t weird?"
"Yes, it’s perfectly normal if you’re just changing frequently for cleanliness. Since you don’t use panty liners, it’s only natural to change whenever you feel unclean."
"Really? Then how many times a day do you change, Elodie unni?"
The question blurted out before I could stop it, almost as if some spine doctor had possessed me.
"I change twice a day, though depending on the situation, I may change three times, like you do, Lady Seah."
"Phew... so it’s fine if I change three times like this sometimes?"
Elodie smiled, nodded, and began taking each item of laundry out of the washing machine and hanging them on the drying rack.
"But... the reason I change underwear so often is that I sweat a lot and it gets damp. Is that still okay?"
"Oh? There’s nothing anyone can do about excessive sweating."
"Hmm~! Then as long as I keep showering twice a day, there shouldn’t really be any problem in the future, right?"
"That’s right, Lady Seah. And if anything ever does seem off with your body, I’ll tell you first thing, so you don’t need to worry."
Elodie’s kind words made me feel incredibly at ease.
Mm—! It felt like being a little kid who’d just been told she didn’t need to go to the dentist.
"Then~ I’m going to rest a bit, so for lunch, let’s have shabu-shabu together like you said yesterday."
"Yes, please wait comfortably, Lady Seah."
Sometimes I felt bad because I ate first and Elodie would eat separately later, but now that she said she’d eat shabu-shabu with me, I was even more excited.
I hummed to myself and headed into the bedroom.
"Though that’s strange. Lady Seah was never someone who sweated at all."
Once I was in the bedroom, I could no longer hear Elodie’s quiet murmur.
* * *
"W-what is this?"
Heretic set down the malatang she’d been slurping and blinked.
"I-it hasn’t even been a week since she started broadcasting, has it?"
Heretic rubbed both eyes with her hands.
"A-ah! It stings!"
Only after eating malatang did she realize she had been torturing herself on purpose.
She hurriedly wiped around her eyes with a wet tissue and sniffled.
"I-I thought she was just flaunting her money before, but what is this? How is this even allowed?"
Heretic’s hands trembled.
It wasn’t like jealousy at beautiful or successful people was anything new for her, but...
"I, I’m!! I’ve been broadcasting diligently for three years and only managed to get to a stream with 300 viewers, so what the hell! Why?! Why does Labellehar unni already have an average of a thousand viewers?!"
With a truly wronged expression, Heretic yelled her lungs out.
"Ugh... uuuugh...! This is making me furious..."
She glanced at the Discord messages she’d exchanged with Kwon Seah the other day.
"Of course someone broadcasting from a fully decked-out studio would do better than me broadcasting from a one-room apartment! I know that! I know that! I’m jealoussssss...!!!"
Her inferiority complex swelling to the brim, Heretic shoved malatang into her mouth to relieve her overheated stress and entered Kwon Seah’s stream.
This time, purely because she wanted to know why she was doing so well...!