Delusion (2)
Delusion (2)
I stepped inside the small church.
The door swung shut behind me, and the clamor of the outside world vanished, replaced by the familiar hush. The smell of incense, old wood, and a faint trace of dust tickled my nose. It felt less like hallowed ground and more like an aging manor house that had been carefully maintained over the years.
Or perhaps I had spent too much time around Estelle and learned the hard way that the Saintess herself wasn't exactly overflowing with sanctity.
Sunlight streamed through the high stained-glass windows. Fragments of red and blue light lay scattered across the floor and over the long weathered pews with a lazy stillness. No one was here.
Just like always.
I walked slowly down the center aisle. My footsteps echoed far too loudly in the empty space. I reached the front row and laid a hand on one of the long benches. The wood was sun-warmed, smooth to the touch.
I'd spent so many hours here with Estelle. She would sit nibbling at some fruit she'd brought from who knows where, and I'd lie with my head on her lap, staring blankly at the ceiling. Back then, she was the only person I could lean on.
It wasn't that I'd grown to dislike her. But the memory of burning alive after clinging to her side wasn't exactly a pleasant one.
None of that remained here now. The memories belonged to me alone. Serepina's daily wishes for my death. Levina's declaration that I'd been cast out of the family. Everything that had happened after Estelle left. All of it lived only in my head.
I turned and made my way toward the narrow wooden stairs leading to the second floor. Each step drew a low groan from the boards. From what I remembered, Estelle hadn't stayed here before I did. Yet the church was immaculate. Not a speck of dust on the pews. Not a trace on the altar.
The second floor opened into a familiar space. I walked over to the window and looked out. The peaceful Academy grounds filled the view. Pleasant memories flickered through my mind, and not a few unpleasant endings followed right behind them. Whether any of those endings could actually be called good was debatable.
I stood there for a long moment before turning to head back down.
I was halfway down the stairs when the church door opened.
I stopped mid-step.
A girl stepped inside. Pure white priest robes, red eyes. The light at her back made her features hard to read, but the silver hair catching the sun was unmistakable.
Estelle.
She shut the door behind her and murmured something to herself without looking my way. Then she slid the bolt into place.
Clack.
The heavy sound rang through the church.
"Who comes to a little church like this, at an hour like this? No one, right?"
Her voice was light and cheerful, but there was an edge of cold beneath it.
"I just started attending recently."
I shrugged and played along, the way I always used to with her.
"Right when the Saintess changes residences, a student suddenly starts going to church. What a coincidence."
But Estelle's red eyes swept over me with the distance of a stranger. If anything, the look bordered on suspicion.
She walked slowly toward the altar, glancing around. Her footsteps echoed through the empty hall.
"Strange. In all this time, not a single person has ever come here."
She stopped in front of the altar, then tilted her head back, slowly, very slowly, to look up at the second-floor stairs.
Our eyes met.
A suggestion of intimacy. Something close to longing. But there was none of that in her red eyes. She stared at me. For a moment, she seemed to lean forward, as if about to step toward me. The movement was almost imperceptible.
Then she caught herself and stepped back instead. A faint flicker of confusion crossed her face.
I finished descending the stairs without a word. The sound of my footsteps tightened her brow.
Estelle stood frozen in place. She fixed me with a gaze sharp enough to cut and spoke.
"You... Ah. I see."
A humorless laugh escaped her lips instead of the rest of her sentence.
"Right. I've been killing a lot of your kind lately."
The words had barely left her mouth before she vanished.
No. She hadn't vanished. She had closed the distance faster than my eyes could follow.
An explosive impact slammed into my chest.
Crunch.
My body flew backward. The old wooden staircase I'd been standing on shattered. Sharp splinters raked across my back, the sensation sickeningly vivid.
"Ngh—!"
I hit the floor hard. I couldn't draw a proper breath. A few ribs were definitely broken. The taste of blood, metallic and raw, spread through my mouth.
I'd figured a first meeting wouldn't exactly be warm, but I hadn't expected this.
I lifted my head with effort and saw Estelle smiling down at me. She walked slowly toward my crumpled, twitching body. The playful smile was still fixed on her face.
"Nice try. With skills like that, you could probably wrap most priests around your finger."
She crouched in front of me and gently brushed the hair from my face. The touch was tender. The red eyes were ice.
"I almost fell for it myself. For a second. Really. Good thing I can't see anything usually. If I could..."
She whispered the words as her fingers caught my chin, tilting my head side to side, studying my face with meticulous care.
"Still, you really do look like him. Uncanny. Nothing about you should be the same, and yet the moment I saw you..."
I'd seen that expression on her face before. Back when I used to follow Estelle around, that was the exact look she wore right before disposing of a priest she didn't like.
At this rate, I was about to die.
I forced my mouth open.
"Edelgard— cough— Levina sent..."
Estelle's fingers on my chin went still. She said nothing for a moment. Then her brow furrowed as she stared into my face. Her hand moved slowly across my features, cold fingers tracing my cheek, brushing past the corner of my eye, lingering at my lip.
"Ah. There it is. You do look like Levina."
The words tumbled out, half to herself. Her red eyes shook violently. She looked like someone who had no idea what she was doing or what she was supposed to do.
That was the last thing I saw before my vision blurred.
When I opened my eyes again, I was immensely relieved to find I had not returned to my room.
What I found instead was Estelle's face, close enough that I could feel her breath.
The instant she realized I was awake, she flinched and pulled back. The expression was playful, the same as always, but her cheeks looked faintly flushed.
"You're up."
She cleared her throat and composed herself with practiced ease.
"Does anything hurt?"
"Doesn't seem like it."
Beneath my head, instead of a hard wooden floor, there was something soft and warm. Her lap.
I tried to sit up. Estelle pressed my shoulder down lightly.
"Stay still. You're not healed yet."
I glanced down. My uniform, which had been pristine, was now frayed, torn in places, and covered in dust.
"Anyway. You're the famous Levina's little brother. I've heard the stories, but you don't quite look the part."
She mussed my hair playfully.
"What, surprised I look more normal than the rumors said?"
"Yeah, I'm surprised. I asked Levina so many times to show me the little menace, and she never would."
I didn't answer that.
"More importantly... you really weren't using some kind of sorcery, were you?"
Estelle's voice turned serious. She laid a hand on my forehead and examined my face again, carefully, searchingly. Her red eyes seemed to bore into mine.
"Most people look hazy to me. Most people. Levina included. But you, for some reason... you're clear."
The words fell from her lips like she couldn't make sense of them. Her hand slid from my forehead to my cheek, then to my chin. The touch was careful this time. Different from before.
"And Levina... that woman would never send someone to me on her own."
"I lied."
"What?"
Estelle's face shifted to disbelief.
"You were going to kill me if I didn't."
She opened her mouth, then closed it, at a loss for words. For a moment her fist clenched tight and came down on my chest. But she looked at my face, let out a long sigh, and uncurled her fingers.
"So. Why did you come?"
Lying across her lap, I looked up directly into her red eyes.
"Help me."
"..."
Estelle didn't answer. The playfulness drained from her expression. She just looked at me like she couldn't understand.
I kept going.
"I'll stay by your side. So help me."
Her eyes widened. Just barely. The smallest fraction. A strange, entranced look took over her face.
Her lips parted slowly.
"...Ah."
She stared, blank, as if her mind had gone somewhere else, and then answered in a voice so small it was nearly swallowed by the silence.
"...Mm. If it's something I can do."
The reply was short. Almost inaudible. Like words that had slipped out against her will. Estelle gazed down at me with a dazed expression, as though she couldn't figure out why she'd said them either.