The Roasted Whole Pig of Esmenta
The carriage tore down the road at a tremendous speed.
Even rattling over the uneven dirt path, it barely swayed.
Something about mana stones being installed here and there for stability—whatever the exact wording, that was the gist of it.
Mana stones were pebbles imbued with magical power. Since they were pretty as gemstones, they were sometimes used to make jewelry.
Like my dog collar.
When the mana inside one ran dry, it lost its luster and color and turned ugly—and the value of a mana stone was decided by how long it could hold on to that shine and hue.
Which means the stone in my dog collar is definitely top grade.
Two years of wear, and it still looked as good as new.
Clunk. The carriage jolted, bouncing slightly off the ground.
Figures.
And yet the interior of the carriage remained serenely indifferent to it all.
Feeling, once again, the full weight of wealth's power, I lifted the curtain hanging over the carriage window.
An hour had passed since we set off, and outside the window, morning had well and truly arrived.
The kitchen staff must be awake by now.
The nutty aroma of fresh bread out of the wood-fired oven, the rich smell of a thick stew bubbling away in a great big pot—the two of them together would be working everyone's appetites into a frenzy.
It was the image and the scent of the kitchen that had been carved into my body like a habit during my time at the Grand Duke's estate.
So even without seeing it, without smelling it, the scene painted itself vividly before my eyes, as if I were standing right there in the middle of it.
And how absurdly, devastatingly tempting that food's smell and taste were, too.
My mouth watered.
Oh, come to think of it, I haven't even had breakfast.
Between butler duties and training, I'd been splitting my hours down to the very last minute of sleep.
But the one thing I would never, ever compromise on was eating.
I'd always been a hearty eater, even back in my Sia days.
Not that I'd call it gluttony.
When you pushed your body hard and trained deeply with your aura, it was only natural for your body to demand generous amounts of fuel.
Besides, I was growing far faster now than I ever had as Sia. It made perfect sense that my body would demand more food.
Grrrooowwl—!
Right on cue, my stomach broadcast its hunger for all to hear.
Oh, dammit.
I supposed I'd been too absorbed in my daydream of the Grand Duke's kitchen. My body was certainly reacting fast enough to prove it.
Still—why now, of all times? In front of the Grand Duke, no less, and inside this cramped little carriage?
For some reason, my carefully laid plan to pursue perfection in front of the Grand Duke seemed to be unraveling bit by bit.
And this is entirely that Grand Duke's fault.
I stole a glare at him, eyes closed in his seat.
If he'd let me eat my meals on time, none of this would have happened.
Maybe because I'd finally registered just how long it had been since my last proper meal, I was rapidly becoming irritable and displeased.
Just then, the Grand Duke's eyes fluttered open. I quickly buried every emotion in my gaze.
He studied my face for a moment. Then those insufferable lips of his twitched.
Don't. Just don't. Don't say a single word!
Contrary to my fervent wishes, the Grand Duke's voice filled the narrow carriage.
"I've heard you've been eating quite often, and quite a lot."
"......"
...He really does report everything, doesn't he.
For a moment, I could almost hear Chief Aide Ed's infuriating little chuckle ringing in my ears before it faded away.
In any case, the whole point of him saying that was to enjoy watching me squirm.
I had no intention of playing along, Grand Duke.
I smiled.
"I can only be grateful for the Grand Duke's household's generous benefits."
Which is to say: I've been making excellent use of your pantry, and I intend to keep doing so—now, and foooorever.
And with that, I bowed my head slightly and offered my thanks in all sincerity.
After all, I could genuinely respect the Grand Duke's refusal to scrimp on food, clothing, or shelter.
Pfft. A small laugh burst from the seat across from me.
Did he just laugh?
My head snapped up.
But the Grand Duke's expression was as impassive as it had been a moment ago, without so much as a hair's difference.
It was definitely a laugh, though. The kind of laugh he'd been holding back, holding back, until it slipped through the gaps in his teeth before he could stop it.
Or not.
Did I mishear it?
I tilted my head slightly and studied him. A moment later, the Grand Duke unfolded his crossed arms and opened the little window connected to the driver's seat, then gave his order.
"To Esmenta Village."
"Yes, my lord!"
The carriage picked up speed.
Esmenta Village.
I remember that place.
It was a village I'd learned about while memorizing the territories of the Cadea Empire.
Right, that village was the one...
famous for its roasted whole pig.
Mmm. I hastily raised a hand and wiped my mouth.
This was a problem. My mouth was watering at the mere mention of a village's name.
In flagrant contradiction of my predicament, an enormous pig was already spinning merrily over a crackling fire in my head.
Delicious.
Crisply roasted skin, lean meat glistening with smoky char and hot juices.
The assorted specialty cuts surfaced in my mind all on their own.
And then my eyes met the Grand Duke's. I caught the corner of his mouth curving upward.
No! He didn't!
I hurriedly smoothed out my expression and ran my fingertips over my lips.
Good grief. I thought I'd actually been drooling.
Hunger was loosening my composure again.
Not allowed. Absolutely not.
At least, not in front of the Grand Duke.
Ahem. Clearing my throat and feigning perfect nonchalance, I asked,
"I thought we were expected at the imperial palace?"
The Grand Duke replied with casual indifference.
"We only need to arrive sometime today. I left early simply to avoid drawing eyes."
Ah, I see. I nodded. He went on.
"It's hardly an errand important enough to justify dragging my butler along on an empty stomach."
"......"
Grand Duke... I gazed at him, deeply moved.
Is he actually considering the state of my stomach...?
It was just a passing remark, but it moved me more than anything ever had.
Grrrowl. My tactless stomach growled again.
I slipped a hand discreetly over my belly and gave it a faint smile.
Just you wait a little longer, my friend. Meat is coming.
I turned to the Grand Duke with grave solemnity and declared,
"Then the moment we arrive, I shall seek out the best restaurant in the village."
As it turned out, I never needed to scout out a restaurant at all.
Because Esmenta Village happened to be home to a restaurant run by a vassal of the Ballot Grand Duchy.
Not long after the Grand Duke and I entered the establishment, a sign went up at the entrance announcing the end of business for the day.
No more customers would be taken today.
The only people who would be using this restaurant were the two of us—him and me.
Abuse of power? In this form, I'll welcome it with open arms.
Thanks to it, the roasted whole pig—which had apparently been turning on the spit since the crack of dawn—arrived on our table in its entirety.
I'd been bracing myself to nibble a single plate of cuts each and merely dull the edge of my hunger, but this unexpected windfall had my eyes going razor sharp.
The whole pig, roasted to a perfect caramel brown, was devastatingly alluring.
Hah, hah. Somehow my breathing had quickened.
I hurriedly picked up the carving knife laid out for the barbecue. Steadying my heart with all the solemnity of a prayer, I set the blade against that crackling caramel skin.
The well-honed knife glided through skin and meat without the slightest resistance.
I portioned a little of everything onto a plate, arranging the cuts neatly, and set it before the Grand Duke.
"Please, eat, my lord."
"You first, butler."
Ah. A poison test, is it?
I spooned a modest helping onto my own plate and speared it with my fork.
"Then, by your leave."
And I stuffed my mouth full of meat.
Hah...! A silent gasp of awe erupted inside me.
It was the best thing I'd eaten since Head Chef Lend's lamb steak.
How to put it—the more I chewed, the more endlessly the juices poured out, a flavor rich enough to kill a person with pure bliss.
The Grand Duke spoke to me.
"Well? How is it, butler?"
Swallowing the mouthful, I answered.
"There is no poison, my lord."
"...Poison?"
The Grand Duke tilted his head. I carved the meat up fresh on a new plate.
"Yes. Which means you may eat with perfect peace of mind."
I arranged the accompanying vegetables tidily alongside the meat and presented it all to him.
Eat up, Grand Duke. When it comes to carving meat, I'm truly second to none.
Ask anyone—I can cut skin, fat, and lean meat together in a ratio worthy of the heavens.
I put on my most confident expression.
The Grand Duke picked up his fork and knife and carried a piece of meat to his mouth. Only after watching him take the bite did I settle back into my seat and begin my own meal.
And so began a period of gloriously warlike eating.
A war waged entirely by me, of course.
The Grand Duke, ever the Grand Duke, dined on with elegance and impeccable grace.
It didn't take all that long to demolish an entire pig.
Having cleanly stripped even the last remaining hind leg down to the bone, I at last set down my fork with an expression of profound satisfaction.
"You really can put it away."
The Grand Duke marveled with unfeigned wonder.
Haha. I simply smiled.
A full stomach made me generous to everything and everyone—if the Grand Duke wanted to babble a few more words at me, I could have indulged him happily all day.
Then, gazing quietly at me, he asked,
"Was it good?"
I answered without a moment's hesitation.
"Yes, my lord. Much as it pains me to say it to Head Chef Lend, when it comes to roasted whole pig, this restaurant is the finest in the land."
At that, the Grand Duke let out a small chuckle.
He had clearly arrived at exactly the same conclusion I had.
And then, a moment later, came his next question.
"Nothing jogs your memory? Nothing at all?"
"I beg your pardon...?"