Why, Why Are You Doing This?
“Why, why are you doing this?”
“If you don’t grant my request, I’ll expose all your secrets to everyone.”
“My secrets?”
Dominic’s eyes darted around nervously. A few things he desperately didn’t want revealed were probably swirling in his mind. But what I knew was one secret he absolutely refused to let slip.
“What is it about our head maid that caught your eye? That stern face? That cold voice? Your tastes are certainly unique, Dominic.”
“Kuh, cough!”
Dominic had been sipping the tea placed there out of courtesy when he spat it out dramatically. His eyes shook violently, silently demanding how I knew.
I recalled Abigail’s memories with a leisurely expression.
“Is she your first love? Is that why you still haven’t mustered the courage to even talk to her?”
“Wh-what are you t-talking about…”
“If you’re that shy, how about I write a letter for you? A heartfelt message of passionate love, sent in Dominic’s name. What do you think?”
“N-no, please don’t!”
I’d only guessed based on Abigail’s memories, but it looked like I’d hit the nail on the head.
Emily Sobrio. Second daughter of Baron Sobrio and currently the head maid of the ducal house. Dominic seemed to have a crush on her. But with his shy personality, he couldn’t bring himself to approach her and only stole glances from afar.
Abigail clearly remembered how he’d come over under the excuse of looking after her as a child, just to sneak peeks at the head maid.
“You’ll grant my request, right?”
“…You’re a devil, my lady. A total devil. Boo-hoo.”
Dominic poured out his resentful words toward me, who had laid bare his pure heart. It didn’t faze me in the slightest. Unfortunately.
“Tell the Magic Tower to send Ren Magicus first, as soon as possible. Father mustn’t know, got it?”
“Haa, I’ll do my best.”
Dominic shook his head as if his headache was worsening, then eyed me suspiciously.
“But why are you so obsessed with the Magicus family?”
“I told you before. I’m interested.”
I couldn’t tell him I planned to use them as a treatment for the duke, so I repeated the excuse I’d been sticking to.
Fortunately, Dominic still didn’t seem to suspect my actions much.
He nodded and rose from his seat.
“Please be careful if you meet him. I’ll take my leave now.”
“Oh, Dominic.”
I stopped him just as he turned to go. Feeling his puzzled gaze, I beckoned with my finger.
“Have some food before you leave.”
“No, I…”
“The shrimp gratin was delicious today.”
“I-I’ll just have a little, then.”
Unable to resist the ducal chef’s gratin, Dominic muttered softly. I smiled and tugged the servant cord to call Annie.
* * *
Two days later, the duke finally regained consciousness. When word came that he was asking for me, I went to see him after finishing my sword training.
It was unexpected. Calling for me the moment he opened his eyes.
Honestly, I didn’t particularly want to see him right now. The unpleasant feeling from thinking he might die was resurfacing.
I sighed inwardly and entered the duke’s room.
“You called for me, Father?”
My words came out much stiffer than I intended. I glanced at his pale face and bit my lip.
“…You’ve come.”
The duke spoke with a composed expression.
“Dominic told me…”
“…”
So Dominic had blabbed unnecessarily. My face soured involuntarily.
“He said you saved me.”
“…”
“Is it true?”
I fell silent for a moment. I didn’t know what to say to the duke.
Conflicting emotions whirled inside me like a vortex. One voice urged me to fawn over him like the old Abigail and gain some favor. Another told me to say nothing.
I just stood there, unsure what to do.
“…Why so quiet?”
“That’s…”
My lips moved, but no words came out. It was then I realized how hard it was becoming to play Abigail.
Only now, with her blood relative standing before me, did I truly understand.
“Abby?”
“I…”
I took a steadying breath.
“Yes, I saved you, Father.”
“…”
“You looked in danger. Sir Jade had mentioned it, so I just tried it out.”
As I spoke calmly, the duke’s expression grew strange. I managed a smile for him.
“Are you feeling better now?”
“Yes.”
“I’m glad.”
And that was it. I had nothing more to say.
My thighs trembled from the intense training. I wanted to hurry back to my room and rest.
But the duke seemed lost in thought and said nothing. Staring down at his haggard face, I reminded myself the stinging in my chest was because of Abigail’s body.
“…If there’s anything you want, tell me.”
“Pardon?”
“No need to feel burdened. It’s out of gratitude.”
I looked at him, wondering what he meant, and saw his face faintly flushed. Was he… embarrassed?
I couldn’t get used to it. I only remembered the face that glared at Abigail with displeasure. He’d been so cold even to his only daughter.
Hm, well, as for what I wanted… Nothing really came to mind.
Abigail would’ve rattled off a list of expensive luxuries, but I had no such material greed. I was content as things were.
“Not really… I don’t need anything.”
“What?”
The duke seemed genuinely shocked. Abigail had been the incarnation of greed, after all.
“Really nothing?”
“Yes.”
I answered indifferently, looking down at his confused face. My stomach was growling now—could I go?
As my mind wandered, I suddenly recalled the name he’d murmured while looking at me here.
‘…Canella… ra…’
Canella Carpoem. The lady of the Carpoem ducal house and Abigail’s mother, the duchess. But she’d been frail and died shortly after giving birth to Abigail.
The duke sent gifts every birthday without fail but never attended the parties. That day was also the anniversary of the duchess’s death.
Pathetic. Truly pathetic love.
Neglecting his daughter because he missed his dead wife. No wonder Abigail turned out so twisted.
To a third party like me, it just looked pitiful.
Maybe that’s why. I felt a spark of curiosity.
I wondered what such an all-consuming love was like.
“Ah, there is one thing I want, Father.”
“What is it?”
The duke looked immensely relieved. He must’ve been uncomfortable with me not acting like my usual self.
But his face twisted at my “request.”
“I’d like to see Mother’s paintings.”
“…Canella’s?”
“Yes.”
The painting by the lake had surely been the duchess’s. The duke didn’t seem the type for such delicate watercolors, and the tools were treated with special care—it had to be hers.
“Why? You never showed any interest in your mother…”
That was because Abigail felt like her mother had stolen him away, even though she’d never seen her face, so she threw tantrums.
In truth, Abigail had been very curious about her mother. But compared endlessly to the kind, warm duchess and ignored by the duke, she’d grown stubborn out of spite.
“I think I glimpsed one of Mother’s paintings by the lake. It sparked my curiosity after that.”
I hadn’t realized it was the duchess’s at the time, so I hadn’t thought much of it.
“…I see.”
The duke was silent for a long while before speaking.
“Very well. I’ll have them brought to you soon.”
“…Yes.”
He permitted it more easily than expected.
“Then I’ll head back now. Don’t push yourself—rest well, Father.”
“…Thank you.”
“…”
Thank you. I never expected to hear those words from the duke, so I was startled.
Forgetting to leave, I stared at him, but he was no longer looking at me.
Hiding my surprised expression, I smiled at him.
“Good night.”
Then I turned and returned to my room.
* * *
A few days later, Dominic secretly informed me. The first warp from the Magic Tower would happen soon, and Ren Magicus would be among them.
I wanted to follow to the magic circle out of curiosity about the mages’ warp, but that request was shot down immediately. Instead, I got a promise to meet Ren Magicus alone.
I took only Annie and May to the appointed parlor. Not the grand one for VIPs, but a small one attached to the annex. Here, I could meet Ren without other servants noticing.
“No need for tea—just go.”
“…Are you sure?”
Annie didn’t show it, but May fidgeted, clearly uneasy about superstitions. She didn’t like me meeting a suspicious mage alone.
But I couldn’t let them hear my conversation with Ren.
“It’s fine. Step out for a bit. Let him in when the mage arrives.”
“Understood, miss.”
May still looked anxious but obediently left the parlor.
I rested my chin on the table and gazed outside.
Northern summers were cool. It was getting properly hot now, but having experienced Korea’s summers, this didn’t feel sweltering.
The crown prince, who attended the capital academy, said it was brutally hot there. That’s why he trained indoors lately. We were still using the outdoor training grounds.
Knock knock.
A neat knock sounded.
“Come in.”
Someone entered the parlor. My gaze landed on the doorway.
“…Ren Magicus?”
“…”
I asked the figure cloaked deeply in a robe. But the presumed mage—Ren—just stood frozen at the door.
The mage, draped in a drab brown robe, seemed wary of me.
I rose from my seat, looking at him.
“You’re Ren Magicus, right?”
“…”
“Don’t just stand there—come closer.”
He hesitated, then slowly approached.
Ren was shorter than I’d imagined. A bit shorter than the current Abigail. How old was he?
I eyed him curiously.
“So, I…”
“I’m sorry!”
“…What?”
His booming voice suddenly filled the parlor, leaving me awkwardly standing there, words lost. I’d only meant to greet him.
Still at a distance, Ren bowed deeply and began begging forgiveness as if the room would collapse.
“I’m sorry, my lady! It’s all my fault! Please forgive me!”
“Hey, calm down, Ren Magicus.”
“I’m sorry! I’m so sorry, my lady…”
I watched him awkwardly, then approached. But the robe’s hood was pulled so low I couldn’t see his face.
After a moment’s thought, I said,
“Can I take off your hood? I need to confirm something.”
“Sniff, um… yes…”
Confirming his nod, I carefully lifted the drab hood.
A sniffling young boy’s face appeared.
“Hm.”
“Hic, sniff…”
Ren, sobbing like a child who’d been harshly scolded, flinched and looked up.
Our eyes met—his green ones brimming with tears.