Chapter 70
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Translator: Silver Dragon
Chapter: 70
Chapter Title: Invitation Match
-----------------------------------------------------------------
After the friendly A-match between Ecuador and South Korea wrapped up, the internet lit up with rants about Jesus Joo.
I bought tickets to the Ecuador match just to see Jesus Joo play live, and this motherfucker gets suspended and doesn't show ^_^
Idiot lol, you should've booked the first match like me.
Jesus bro vs Chinks match, and you thought he wouldn't get suspended lol. Is your brain a hat rack?? lolol
For real lolol, is this shit real?
Lmaooo didn't you see Jesus bro play? Go watch it, he's insane!
Whoa... big trouble, I'm already hyped for the World Cup.
Still two years away, dude?
With yesterday's performance and Jesus bro's finishing, round of 16 is easy peasy for real.
Dumbasses riding the hype train, aww~ even with Jesus Joo we'll flop in groups~ wake up~
Thinks soccer's a solo sport, you fucking clueless noobs lol
Why's this guy so pissed?
Probably a Haechi Unicorns fan.
No fuck, inviting a 4th division team for a mid-season friendly? Makes zero sense?
Lmaooo it's a real Haechi fan.
Time flew by.
Early July.
The invitation match between Colchester United and Haechi Unicorns at Haechi Unicorns' home stadium was unfolding with Haechi holding the upper hand.
"See? I told you the game's not working! How's a 4th division team doing this?!"
At that moment, Enzo Martínez shook off Haechi Unicorns' pressure and launched a counterattack.
"Whoa~ who's that crazy bastard? Why's he so good?"
"That's Enzo Martínez, the guy on loan from La Fábrica."
"Insane, why's he playing in the 4th division?"
"He's the next captain of the Kimchi Pirates. His fandom for Jesus bro is off the charts."
In truth, there had been a ton of online backlash about this invitation match. The angriest were the Haechi Unicorns supporters, and their gripes made sense once you heard them.
"Playing an invitation match mid-season? No league break either, so while other teams rest, we're playing extras and barely getting any downtime before facing others. Promotion's on the line, and they invite a 4th division team—not even Premier League or Championship level..."
In response to the furious fans, Haechi—the confectionery company—quickly negotiated with our side and issued a statement to calm things down.
"It was a secret event, but Jesus Joo was set to play about 20 minutes in Colchester United's kit. Post-match, there'll be a fan meet with him plus various events. Any season ticket holder for Haechi Unicorns can attend."
And now, as Jesus Joo stepped onto the touchline...
The crowd murmured louder.
"Ooh—! He's coming!"
"Woooaaah—! Jesus Joo!!!"
"Jesuuuus broooo!! I looooove yoooouuu~!!!"
"Fuck—! Missed him in Ecuador cuz I bought tickets, but being a Haechi fan let me see him!!!"
"Haechi fans must be happy, right?"
"I~ am happy."
Jesús Joo waved to the cheering fans and subbed in.
The three La Fábrica lads, including Enzo Martínez, teared up with emotion as Jesus Joo entered the pitch.
'Oh God! I get to play with Jesus!'
'This is it, this is why I transferred to Colchester!'
'Wonder if we'll get dinner together again like last time...'
While the trio was lost in thought, Jesus Joo grinned and slung an arm around Enzo Fernández's shoulder.
"Enzo! Mind if I take the free kick?"
"...Huh? Y-Yes!"
Takes me back to school days with the local thugs lmao
Lol so funny
That's commentator Lee Do-hyun saying Jesus Joo looks like a local thug.
[Commentator Lee Do-hyun's quick apology—bet Jesus Joo forgives him.]
From the bench, I watched the match, sizing up Haechi Unicorns' goalkeeper.
Great feet, solid saves. Couldn't figure out why he was a backup in the 2nd division.
I asked Enzo Martínez for the free kick.
"Enzo! Mind if I take it?"
"...Huh? Yes!"
The young keeper's face caught my eye.
Wonder if he can stop this.
If he does, national team keeper worries are over.
About 26 meters from goal.
Haechi Unicorns players looked tense as I stood behind the ball.
Tweet!
The ref's whistle blew. I ran up slowly and curled it with my left foot.
Thwack—!
Ah! Damn my competitive streak! I knew the second I struck it I'd fucked up.
Meant to hit it savable, but my damn will to win turned it into a pinpoint rocket to the corner.
Sigh. No way he saves this?
As I sighed and headed to center circle...
Thud—
Aaaaaaaah—! He saved it!!
The keeper's save drew boos from the crowd.
I turned at the jeers. The flushed keeper had blocked my shot and was roaring. I bolted to him!
"Vamos!!!"
The 185cm ripped dude charged yelling Spanish the kid couldn't understand, face going pale. Tough luck. I locked him in a headlock, ruffled his buzzcut potato head like a baseball teammate, and roared.
Fuck! Where you been hiding?!
Whatever! Keeper's saved!
Still hyped, I sprinted to the corner flag camera for a ceremony. Punches in the air, kicks, pointing to the sky, mourning my old life.
Everyone else looked baffled, but I didn't care!
A keeper who can stop my free kick!
Jackpot, absolute jackpot!
Match end.
Colchester United 5 : 3 Haechi Unicorns.
Jesus bro's influence is wild...
For real, offers pouring in just cuz Jesus bro said something ;;
He's done so many wild things it's skewed, but managers voted him #1 soccer player best suited for coaching.
And his eye for talent topped the list.
What y'all talking about? That's not my point.
This. (FIFA Online delisted Yoo Young-beom cards for sale.jpg) See the buy orders? ;;
Fuck off FIFA nerds!
Lol which striker gets happy missing a goal?
(Jesus Joo grinning like Liu Bei after Zhuge Liang's arrival at Yoo Young-beom's save.gif)
(Jesus Joo ceremony spam at Yoo's save show.gif)
Turns out it was our star striker Jesus Joo lol
Jesus bro was genuinely thrilled.
Haechi Unicorns idiots? Why starter over the backup?
Fuck. Shows how rotten Korean soccer is.
Haechi Unicorns supporter here. Yoo Young-beom joined via trials last Dec! Stop slandering us!
Articles everywhere lately, read before hating...
Y'all hating on Haechi without reading news, so here's the TL;DR you fucks.
Yoo Young-beom's life story.
1. Graduated high school at 173cm—no pro clubs or college scholarships.
2. Gave up soccer, enlisted immediately. Grew 15cm in the army.
3. Post-discharge, debating soccer comeback when he saw Jesus bro score in CL final and win.
4. Hyped, canceled cram school secretly, tried K-League trials but timing off. Heard Haechi trials in Dec, applied blind.
5. Got in.
6. Hard training = quick improvement. Adapted fast to height spurt.
7. Benched the starter, started vs Colchester.
8. Now this. Got it?
And advice for any soccer noobs thinking blind challenge like him:
(HS Yoo Young-beom save stats.jpg)
173cm, tiny for GK, but save rate nuts right?
Don't quit on hype. We ain't him.
Young-beom god was talented from the start.
Thanks for talking me out. Saw Young-beom story, got hyped, was about to drop out for trials.
Lmaoooooooo
Saved one soul lol
Fuck post sooner, I just dropped out today
Idiot run to admin and cancel it
Dropped out calling advisor impotent bald eagle, ok? Think kneeling begs him back?
Grad student?
Yeah
Slave lol just escape now.
Grad student's fucked lol boomer! Too late, job hunt or beg advisor!
Age don't matter, better regret doing than not. Challenge it.
Jesus bro! Knew you'd get me! Training hard now, see ya on national team!
...And Jesus bro just ruined another life.
Not our life anyway.
True, we can backseat others' lives.