Chapter 57

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Translator: penny

Chapter: 57

Chapter Title: The World Is Cold (3)

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"Bro, people are really curious about your face."

"Let 'em be curious. I'm never uploading my face. If I do, the gallery will lose its shit with crap like 'This guy's actually capable of laying eggs' or 'Sad dinosaur who couldn't become a dragon.' No way in hell."

Hmm.

As expected from a senior—he knows this stuff inside out.

"Your face is pretty, so just throw on a bunny girl outfit, snap a selfie, and upload it."

"You little shit?"

We're currently in Zone 2 of Dino World.

Zone 1 was the dense jungle I saw earlier, and Zone 2 was a swamp—one step more evolved.

The ground is squishier than expected, making movement tough.

Thinking about facing traps and minions here, Dino World is clearly no pushover dungeon.

"Invaders seem weak to the heat, so they use flame magic traps and fire-type minions like salamanders to wear them down in the jungle, then finish them off here in the first real clash."

Using the swamp's advantages, with relatively mobile minions and poison traps to slowly erode the intruders.

"Not bad, huh?"

"Right? But if a mage who can cast platforms shows up, they fight on those. Still, it limits their space, so it's decent overall!"

Secha Ham started rattling off about his dungeon.

Like an excited kid bragging about their accomplishments.

"The perk of the ancient theme is the variety of minions that shine on land, sea, and air. In this swamp full of trees and woods, there's the Ancient Croc—a fire-breathing crocodile..."

This guy just wanted to show off his dungeon, didn't he?

Once he got started, he wouldn't shut up.

Maybe I should butter him up a bit.

Time to flex some social skills.

"Honestly, out of all the dungeons I've seen, Dino World is the coolest, bro."

"R-Really...?"

"You might not know this, but I once watched a movie called Jura-World that blew me away. Your true form, plus crocs in this swamp—it's so atmospheric, feels less like a dungeon and more like a work of art. Man, I'm floored."

"Ahem..."

Secha Ham's lips curled up uncontrollably.

That's why my old boss always dragged me to after-work drinks.

All thanks to this sycophant's silver tongue.

Well, not like I was on payroll or anything.

But making a buddy happy makes me happy too.

So I gave him the thumbs up.

Secha Ham scratched his head, looking bashful.

"What if we placed an anomaly minion in this swamp, bro? What do you think?"

"Entrance is best, right? Chipping their strength early minimizes later losses."

Hmm.

What to call this...

Ah, right.

"It'd induce confirmation bias perfectly."

"Huh?"

"Your dungeon's all about smashing minions and traps—that's the strategy."

"Every dungeon except Dreamland runs that way from the start."

I nodded.

"So... they'll probably assume this anomaly minion is the same—something to smash with high probability."

Secha Ham's pupils dilated.

His tail wagged furiously—he got it.

I'm not gay or anything.

But damn, it was kinda cute.

Green-haired twintail loli dragon form.

Fuck, why the hell isn't this a girl?

The ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠world's fucked up.

Suddenly pissed off.

Oblivion.

You're the type who draws a girl and insists it's a guy, huh.

Aren't you scared of this Newbie's rage?

You're my enemy starting today.

"Newbie. You're a real bastard."

"Honor."

"Anyone who crosses you must be exhausted."

"Bro, I'm not that ruthless a Dungeon Master."

"Hmm..."

Why that look?

I'm a good guy.

"Bro."

"Yeah?"

"...All this assumes the anomaly minion works normally, so you should plan for if it doesn't."

Better to have backup plans.

The elevator's free to use, no bullshit.

But traps unfortunately can't be installed.

And Dino World's mostly open fields, so no reason for intruders to hop in the elevator.

"Yeah. If this minion moves right, it'd make things so much easier..."

Placing the anomaly minion went off without a hitch.

I placed two—weeping statue minions at the entrance.

Overkill? Maybe, but prep is never bad.

Now, just wait for intruders.

Secha Ham showed me beyond Zone 2—other zones, even the core room.

Most impressive was Zone 10, right before the core room.

They call it the Spring of Healing.

Tons of minions were bathing there.

Giant dragons straight out of fantasy, eyes closed ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠in bliss.

Happy expressions everywhere.

What to call this...

Big king, big cute.

Not just giant dragons either.

From lizardmen to all sorts of reptiles.

These are the ancient theme's hireable minions?

My minions are all freaky weirdos.

After Dreamland's dank gloom, this healing vibe ain't bad.

"Wounded minions heal here. And as you saw, Zone 9 has tons of fields—that's our main income source. Minions work there and come here to rest. Bathing relieves stress and fatigue. Can't skip the golden fields explanation—they handle food too..."

Yeah, yeah.

Our Secha Ham craves praise.

"Whoa! So amazing! Super duper amazing! The power of the ancient theme!? Jootak's shocked, the world's amazed, even Newbie's in awe... Dino World is just too perfect!"

"Hehe..."

I went full ham with double thumbs up and hype.

Secha Ham was thrilled, practically flipping in excitement.

Yeah, yeah.

Bro happy? That's all that matters.

Even while staying in Dino World, I kept tabs on Dreamland.

Thankfully, no intruder bullshit.

After all those dead dwarves, no way they'd come back.

Chase's suicide note sealed it—safe.

Anyway.

The hook's baited.

Electric shock rod ready to zap the fish.

Now just wait.

Hope the anomaly minion works here too.

About a week after I arrived at Dino World.

Intruders finally showed.

Minions resting at the Spring of Healing scattered to their zones at Secha Ham's wave alert.

Even with injuries not fully healed, they hustled.

You could see they loved this dungeon.

Secha Ham and I monitored from the core room.

"See that... Oh, you can't see the hologram, so I'll upload to the gallery."

"That guy's a Sword Master...?"

"Yeah. That's the Sword Master fucker."

Middle-aged guy covered in scars.

Human male, notable for no shirt.

Freezing outside, yet topless—world's got style.

No wonder the World Tree elves brought him.

Photo alone exudes intimidation.

If we threw down, I'd get wrecked in a second.

Guy's instinct.

"Now we just pray your minion moves."

"Whew..."

The elves and Sword Master were strong.

Handled the attacking fire lizards and pushed forward boldly.

Took them half a day to clear Zone 1.

Secha Ham said that's fast.

"Fire lizards are sneaky pains—usually takes two days... But their pace is insane."

Next up: Zone 2.

Anomaly minion waiting there.

Even a Sword Master equals a kid before an anomaly.

If it works normally, we got this.

I prayed inwardly.

Please, please, move.

But.

"...Goddamn. They passed it."

"What?"

"Your minion won't budge in my dungeon..."

Method failed.

Was I too optimistic?

Then my trip here's pointless.

Secha Ham looked conflicted.

Sighed deeply, then smiled.

"I'll handle it somehow."

"..."

"Honestly, you dropped everything despite worrying about your own dungeon—thanks so much."

"Bro..."

"Don't worry. I'm still level 2-3x yours. Escape scroll—use it, head back to Dreamland with Mallang."

Secha Ham looked relieved.

Hard to believe it's a crisis.

Like someone who'd made peace.

No good if he acts like he's done for.

My circle's small already—can't lose Secha Ham.

Without Dungeon Gallery, I'd have died of loneliness.

I get lonely easy.

They're more than friends to me.

Even if faceless mostly.

Time here is precious.

I can't just watch friends vanish.

Any way out?

Dump all points into me for power-up?

Unlocking anomaly traits needs 5 mil+ points base.

Best value ever.

But my points are nowhere near.

Stat dumps possible, but won't make a dent.

Think.

Think endlessly.

Need a breakthrough.

"Ah, fuck."

Found it.

Why didn't I think of it sooner?

Am I an idiot?

Simple enough—worth trying.

I stared at the hologram and stood.

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