Chapter 5: The Angel with Pubic Hair
The Angel with Pubic Hair
"......What the hell are you?"
The Black Knight stared at the woman who had suddenly approached him and spoke.
"Call me the nosy angel~!"
Upon hearing her self-proclaimed title, the Black Knight muttered under his breath.
"You're insane."
"Uuu~! That's so mean~!"
The so-called angel puffed out her cheeks in playful frustration.
"If you escaped from a mental hospital, I should probably report you."
"I didn't~! I just came out for a walk!"
Clank. Clank. Clank. Clank.
"Ah! Where are you going~?"
The angel called out to the Black Knight as he slowly walked away.
"My mistake for engaging with a lunatic."
Thud—!!
"Hey, you—!! You look really sad. Want to talk to me?"
"Hey."
"Yes!"
Wham—!!
The Black Knight shoved his helmet right in front of the angel's nose as a warning.
"My mood's already in the shitter, so I suggest you don't push it. Unless you want your jaw broken, shut the hell up and scram."
"Ehh..."
Swoosh.
The Black Knight lifted his head again and took a step forward.
Clank. Clank. Clank.
"Yahp."
Thwack—!!
"!!!!!!!!!"
With the angel's light battle cry, a golden sword suddenly pierced the ground right in front of the Black Knight.
"You little bitch—!! Did she send you—?!"
The Black Knight shouted in shock, turning back toward the angel standing behind him.
"I'm bored~! Keep me company~!"
".............."
This woman is a magician.
That much was certain.
But he also realized she was a magician who had completely lost her mind.
The Black Knight figured that if he tried to walk away now, things would only get more annoying.
So, in the end...
Plop.
He sat down on the sandy beach and quietly spoke.
"Goddammit... Today's just not my fucking day..."
Plop.
The angel knelt beside him and lightly settled down.
"So, Mr. Black Knight, what do you do?"
".......College student."
"Ehh~! You sound pretty deep-voiced for someone who's not even in their thirties but still in college?"
"......Most people don't judge by... Never mind."
The Black Knight recalled his guild leader, who had been over 190 cm tall even at 15, and immediately retracted his words.
"I see~! But why do you look so down?"
"Even if I told you, you wouldn't get it."
"Just give me the short version~!"
She didn't seem malicious at all.
Her eyes were a pure, innocent blue.
Nothing like Azaria, who had been full of schemes to manipulate him.
Emotionally broken, he began explaining his situation with a sense of resignation.
"I'm dead."
"Huh?"
"Everyone who knew me in the past... they've all forgotten me. I'm alone now."
"I... don't really get it..."
"There's no reason for me to be here anymore. I'm just a worthless piece of flesh."
Swoosh.
The Black Knight stood up quietly and sighed as he spoke.
"What the hell am I even saying to some woman I just met..."
"I... see..."
".........."
Then, the angel's next words stopped him in his tracks.
"Being alone is really lonely. I know that too."
".......Must be hard making friends in a mental hospital."
"Ugh, seriously~~!!!"
"Whatever, that's the end of my story. If you've heard enough, scram."
"Wait."
"What now?"
"What kind of person were you before you were forgotten?"
"Why the hell are you asking that?"
"Because I want to know!"
".................."
Maybe he had humored her stubbornness just to soothe his own shattered heart.
But her final question drove a dagger straight into his broken soul.
"What kind of question is that..."
Crack.
A sound like something splitting apart echoed—not literally, but perhaps from deep within his chest.
Probably...
"Like, did you enjoy helping people? Or maybe you loved animals? Stuff like that!"
"Why the hell would you care about that..."
"Because I want to know more about you—!!"
Whoosh—!!
The angel stretched both arms toward the sky and shouted.
"Getting to know each other—!! I think that's an amazing thing!! If everyone's forgotten you, then we can just start over!! So tell me about yourself!! I'll be the first to learn about you—!!"
".......You."
"Yes!"
"Your left armpit's not fully shaved."
"KYAAAAAAAH—!!"
Bam—!!
"Ow."
The angel punched the Black Knight's helmet in retaliation.
"Kyaaaah...!! Hoo... hoo..."
She began blowing on her swollen right hand like an idiot.
"Fine. I'm the kind of guy who gets porn recommendations from my household android, steals school equipment to make Magic Soldier Gear, and charges a 70% weekly interest rate to anyone who borrows money from me. A real fucking economic genius."
"..............."
The angel's expression stiffened as the Black Knight continued.
"Oh, and last year, I aced the Floor-humping Level 1 Certification exam on my first try—"
"That's enough."
The angel cut him off with a dead-serious face.
"What? There's more."
"I said I like getting to know people, but I never wanted to know this."
"Don't be picky. A balanced diet helps you grow tall."
"I'm already an adult—!! I'm 25, goddammit—!!"
"Oh, right. Pubic hair grows even if you're not an adult, huh?"
"KYAAAAAH—!! Don't talk about pubic hair—!!"
The two bickered like that for a long while on the beach.
"Huff... huff... After this conversation, I definitely know who you are...!!"
"A total badass delinquent?"
"Nope."
Swoosh.
The angel smiled faintly and spoke.
"You're a brutal delinquent."
"Huh?"
"A delinquent worse than a beast~!"
"You little—? I've been told I am worse than a beast."
"Isn't that even worse?"
"Guess so."
"Pfft."
"Why the laugh?"
The Black Knight was puzzled as the angel burst into giggles.
"You seem more lively now, Mr. Delinquent."
"............I guess."
Clank.
The Black Knight raised his right hand, lost in thought.
("I'd forgotten. Who I really am.")
His face was unreadable beneath the helmet, but if he had one, he'd probably be smiling.
"I'm a goddamn delinquent. Even if everyone forgets me, that won't change."
He had rediscovered his true nature.
"That... doesn't sound like a great title, though?"
The Black Knight shrugged off the angel's criticism.
"It's who I am. No matter what anyone says, I'm a delinquent."
".......You've found yourself again."
"Thanks to some crazy bitch."
Clank. Clank. Clank. Clank.
With that, the Black Knight left the angel behind and walked away from the sandy shore.
"See you again someday, Mr. Delinquent."
___. ___
Whoooosh...
This was Valentine Garden.
The headmistress's office.
"Headmistress."
A woman with an eyepatch addressed Azaria, who sat in her chair.
Sip. "What is it, Subaru?"
Azaria elegantly sipped her black tea as she spoke.
"You said that Black Knight would return to you, didn't you?"
"I did."
"It's already been a week."
"........."
Azaria's movements froze at Subaru's words.
"Shouldn't you start preparing...?"
"No. I'll wait. He will come back. I'm certain of it."
"Is that so?"
Another week passed.
"Headmistress."
"Yes. Found him?"
"You've been spending a lot of time in your office lately."
"Ah~! It's only polite to be here when a guest arrives. I've been waiting just in case."
"I see. As expected of you, Headmistress."
Another week later.
"Headmistress... I'll go down and search for him myself."
"No... I'll wait."
Azaria, dark circles under her eyes, answered her guard, Subaru.
"......Do you really need that man that badly?"
"I do. But unless he comes to me willingly, it's meaningless."
"............."
"Subaru. Do you think I'm doing this out of pride?"
"Yes."
Subaru answered immediately.
"..........No."
"Let's leave it at that."
Another week later.
"I'll go down now."
"................."
Azaria stared at Subaru with an expression of utter disappointment.
"I'll be back."
Taking her silence as approval, Subaru bowed lightly and stepped out of the office.
Creak. Thud.
Step. Step. Step. Step.
Subaru walked down the hallway with measured strides, drawing admiration from the students around her.
"Professor Subaru is so cool...!!"
"Did you see her combat magic class this morning?!"
"Ahh...!! Let's try asking her to lunch tomorrow~!"
"H-how am I supposed to do that~?!"
To the students, she was like a prince.
Strength, personality, eloquence—she was flawless in every way.
That was why she was the most popular professor at Valentine Garden.
But...
Tap.
"Um... Professor Subaru!!"
A girl with an orange ponytail suddenly appeared before her.
"Azusa. What is it?"
Subaru asked the student standing in front of her.
"How much longer until Touka comes back to the garden...?"
Seeing the girl's anxious fidgeting, Subaru gently placed a hand on her head.
Swoosh.
"Don't worry. She's the strongest magician in this garden. A mission like this won't hurt her."
"B-but... taking on a Catastrophe alone..."
"I understand your concern, but shouldn't you be focusing on your exams right now?"
"Ahh...!! Y-yes! Thank you for answering!"
Whoosh—!!
The girl bowed deeply before hastily running off.
Tap.
"So, he'll be attending classes here too."
Subaru muttered meaningfully.
"..........I can't even imagine it."
___. ___
About a month had passed since the Catastrophe appeared—and was destroyed—in Pluto's T-1 Zone.
Tap.
"I'm here, big brother."
Amidst the chaos of the world, a single girl stepped into the city of magicians.