Chapter 1
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Translator: 8uhl
Chapter: 1
Chapter Title: The Star Shines
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One day, I met a star.
The star departed.
Leaving just one phrase behind.
"Follow your own justice."
I see the star.
It's a star only visible to my eyes.
The first time I encountered it was right after completing my firefighter training, just before my first day on the job.
At first, it was fascinating.
'Even when I close my eyes, it's still there.'
It wasn't a star in the sky—it was floating inside my head.
'Am I special or something?'
Did it appear because I was popular?
Because I had such a bright aura?
Because my future looked so promising?
Or maybe because I pulled so many pranks as a kid?
Because I'm a good-hearted pervert?
I analyzed it every way I could, but there was no logical explanation.
'They sure didn't teach this in school.'
But I quickly learned its effect on me.
What do you think it was like?
If a star suddenly appeared in your mind, its bluish glow dazzling your eyes...
'Ugh, eye-blinding light!'
...and if that light was filled with bone-chilling cold?
'The star... is terrorizing me?'
The starlight brushing my cheeks and forehead was chillingly cold. Even in the peak of summer, that freezing sensation froze my brain, filling me with an inescapable terror of death.
That was when it began.
The severe headaches started.
The headaches led to insomnia, the insomnia to physical exhaustion and frayed nerves, and eventually to shortness of breath, weakened immunity, and loss of sensation.
Countless diseases I'd never even heard of clawed at my body.
"Why are you doing this to me?"
My hands clutched a bunch of pill bottles as I asked.
But the meds did nothing.
Ever since the star appeared, no medicine worked on my body.
'At least ibuprofen has some effect. Ditch the rest.'
Acetaminophen, antihistamines, alprazolam, escitalopram, zolpidem tartrate... and whatever else.
Running back and forth between hospitals and pharmacies hadn't brought healing—just knowledge about painkillers, antidepressants, and sleeping pills I'd never cared about before.
"There has to be a reason you're doing this."
The star had no mouth.
Probably no ears either, that glowing bastard.
"God, Buddha, spirits of heaven and earth—please make this star go away."
I even tried praying, but as an atheist, it fell flat.
Priests and self-proclaimed holy men just begged for money.
I hope those scammers rot in hell.
Rather than lying back and taking it, I was the stubborn type who fought back however I could.
'I've gotten all the help I can. If nothing works, the rest is up to me.'
I gritted my teeth in defiance.
To keep that star's intense light from stealing my one and only life.
"You mute little shit! Can't even talk back, huh? All you got is eye-terror? Bald-ass bitch! Why you throwing a hissy fit over hair loss at me?!"
I provoked it outright.
It was the only way to keep from going insane.
"I'll pass right through you!"
Not medicine or faith, but my optimistic lunatic nature—that was my weapon against the star.
I wanted to live.
The me before the pain knew the refreshment of clean air and cool water.
I was someone who hung out with friends and flirted sweetly with girls, enjoying sweet youth.
Life can't always be beautiful, but just being alive is a good thing in itself, right?
"No headache~. Eyes not blinding~. Not tired~."
I couldn't do anything about the eye or brain strain from a thing visible even with eyes closed, but I figured I could manage the headaches from the cold.
"Jang-gun's showering again?"
"Yeah, Mom! Sweating a lot!"
What could I do?
A pain I couldn't tell anyone about or get help for—if I wasn't dying, I had to fight it myself.
'Keep trying till I die. If it doesn't work then, I can die then.'
To rebuild my stamina, get stronger, survive—I never skipped a day of exercise.
Exhausting my body let me sleep even through the dazzling light. Like how you can sleep with the lights on when you're dead tired.
'Better circulation must be easing the headaches.'
I kept close to heat, too.
Electric blankets on basic during sleep, hot packs on my head even in midsummer.
"Yeees~. As long as you're alive and don't give up, you somehow make it through."
After tearful efforts, I managed to reclaim some normalcy.
"Why'd you become a firefighter, Jang-gun?"
"To make a living."
What did the details matter?
I was just walking the path fate laid out.
"Too honest."
"I can't lie, Senior."
Maybe as compensation for senses dulled by long torment from that star bastard, or because my nerves got sharper...
My intuition was sharper than anyone's.
- Save me...
I'd hear voices only in my ears.
The gurgling death rattles from dying throats, puppies whimpering in fallen elders' arms, cats thrashing in the embrace of suffocating owners.
I'd catch them somehow, find them somehow, save them.
That merit earned me the record for fastest promotion to lieutenant.
"Overcoming one weakness gains you one or more strengths."
I nodded, recalling words from someone I admired.
If that was true, maybe the starlight had some helpful side after all.
My fellow firefighters were closer than brothers. They never pointed fingers at my nervy edges, accepting me as I was.
"Jang-gun! Set up a blind date for this lonely bro? I was your trainer, after all—"
"My friends have high standards."
"Damn, you turn it back on me good. Come here and chow down some cup ramen."
I had a trainer who looked out for me fiercely.
"What about me, then, Senior—"
"You think you're more human-looking than this bro right now?"
"Waaah—. Have mercy, Senior—."
"Bull. You bear-faced punk acting cute."
And a junior who followed me like an older brother.
We were tight enough to sling bone-deep jokes without hesitation, closer than friends.
Friends and girlfriends aplenty, but no one opened my heart as easily as those who suffered alongside me.
"Don't be mad, brooo—. I'll set something up next year."
"Ooh, that's my Kim Jang-gun! Raised a good sidekick! Knew it, so I hid some rock-hard eggs!"
Holding on, enduring—I was living normally before I knew it.
With a star on my head.
So, my life seemed to be flowing okay.
Too harsh and unfair to call it a firefighter's fate.
"Jingle bells~ Jingle bells~ Jang-gun! Merry Christmas! It's Christmas Eve—heading off to meet your girlfriends after shift?"
"Wanna come?"
"Ooh? Blind date?"
"Just grab dinner."
"Ah... yeah! That's good too!"
Our chit-chat ended there.
That damn blind date—what was so hard about it? I'd have set it up sooner.
'Ow, eye-blinding! Why's this bastard suddenly acting up?'
That day, I saw the star flicker for the first time.
I thought it odd, but the star wasn't priority one.
Firefighters never have time.
Rescue was urgent.
Third floor of a building engulfed in flames and thick toxic smoke.
Our senior, the rescue captain and firefighter, was firm.
"Jang-gun! Get down first!"
"Bro! There's someone inside—!"
"I'll save 'em. Bad feeling. You go first."
My trainer and rescue captain hurled me out from the third floor.
"...You're the only one."
Those were his last words.
Time stretching as I fell amid shattering glass felt endless.
I flailed.
Not at the empty air—at time itself.
I wanted to stop time.
Kwaaaaang—!
The building spewed a massive pillar of fire with the explosion.
To my eyes, it looked like a fire dragon.
The dragon shook the earth, tore the air, and soared skyward.
Grrrrumble—.
Collapse inside the building.
My junior was on the first floor, searching for survivors.
Beeeep—.
Tinnitus from the blast shock drowned out all sound.
My eyes bulged like they might burst, thick nosebleeds flowing with each pounding air pulse.
On the vibrating asphalt amid the crew's frantic steps, I just sat there, soul shattered.
The star shone brilliantly again, as if mocking me.
'Damn bastard...'
I wasn't smart enough to heed the star's warning.
Hesitated too long finding the victim—my people died because of it.
The damn bastard was me.
"Ugh... Uwaaaaaah—!"
Finally grasping reality, all I could do was wail.
"Jingle bells~ Jingle bells..."
"Kim Jang-gun, I get you're hurting, but no singing during the investigation."
I kept recounting the scene I dreaded remembering, moment by moment.
"There was a victim, so we were rescuing when the senior—"
I explained as observed, as felt.
Why and how they died—they needed to know. Detailed records were essential.
I believed that would soothe my brothers' souls.
"Senior unhooked my air tank... smashed the window with it... threw me out... and..."
Repeating it made the scenes sharper in my mind.
Starlight etched into memory made them clearer day by day.
'This is my gift to you! A promotion from our center! My sidekick's the best!'
'Senior Kim Jang-gun is so cool!'
'Jang-gun, bro's gotta save at least one. The only one I can save right now is you.'
Painful memories sharpened daily, eventually slicing my sanity like a blade.
I'd fought so hard to endure the star's torment unscathed.
Then—click—the safety pin released in my head.
I lost my mind.
After the accident, I distanced myself from friends and other colleagues.
'Get close to me, and you die.'
Even Mom, plagued by migraines her whole life, became miraculously fine after I moved out. So it wasn't just paranoia.
'Heh, I'm crazy.'
Accepting I was nuts actually eased my mind.
Lifting self-imposed restraints made the mania worsen daily.
I overpowered a drunk kicking an ambulance.
Broke the arm of someone swinging a knife at firefighters during a suicide attempt.
Pushed a car parked in the fire truck zone out of the way with the truck.
Beat up tattooed pigs starting shit in the ER.
Things no sane firefighter would do.
"Kim Jang-gun, this makes your 108th complaint, lawsuit, report combined. Why not take some time off if it's tough?"
"108... earthly troubles. Even amid worldly woes, troubles are starlight... shave head, amen."
"Look at this guy, actually nuts... "
Too perceptive. Must be the inspector vibe?
'The star appeared because I'm crazy.'
I was too foolish to realize it sooner.
'I was born crazy.'
Too late to see it—my good colleagues died.
Just a slightly strong weak human in an orange suit.
I never should've become a firefighter.
So I lived as a mad firefighter. Still with the shining star.
"Jingle bells~, Jingle bells~."
Like the moon changing phases.
Like the sun rising and setting.
Time flowed indifferently, Christmases passing.
"Jingle bells~ Jingle bells~ Jingle jingle bells~. Our sleigh's fuckin' fast—run fast ho~."
And winter came again.
[Trrrring-]
[Fire outbreak! Emergency dispatch! Rescue team deploy!]
Even a madman has to feed his family, and that takes money.
To eat and live, gotta work.
"Suits on! Quadron incoming. Rescue team, deploy swift via Quadron!"
Rescue captain's orders rang out.
"Jingle bells~ Jingle bells~."
I swayed to the dirge's beat.
Slipped into the busy crowd donning sleek silver suits.
Kyeeeeung—.
A massive, red-painted hornet descended on the center's front yard.
"Jingle bells~ Jingle bells~ Our drone's fuckin' fast—fly fast~."
Helmet tucked under arm, heading for the red eight-seater Quadron.
My hollow eyes sharpened, brow furrowing like pinched.
'Huh? Where'd that pervert go?'
The star vanished.
'Where the hell...'
Then reappeared.
'Son of a...'
Flicker—flicker—flicker—.
That creepy bastard was up to its old tricks again.