Hyeolma Guard: The Goblin Escort Service
"Live well, human!! Kerk!!"
"Hmm···."
"What's wrong, Master!"
"We're building favorability, but···."
Our goblins were hard at work on the second floor of the Labyrinth, steadily raising their favorability with humans. Thanks to the sacrifices of the previous generations of goblins, human wariness was gradually easing. It felt like we were almost there, but something decisive was still missing. Goblin survival rates had improved a lot, yet it still wasn't enough.
Do you know how heartbreaking it is every time a goblin dies?
A goblin has died.
"Agh, my backpack!!!"
"···Master."
"What?"
"What do you think of your familiars!"
"Workers carrying two-hundred-thousand-won backpacks."
"···And me?"
"A chatty flying squirrel."
"Kuhuk. How did someone like this become the True Ancestor···."
"Peanut confiscation?"
"M-Master is the best!"
When I shot him a glare, Mongmo quickly looked away. Did he think I was enjoying this? But there was no choice. I couldn't exactly kill humans just to save goblins. Or bite them and turn them into vampires? If word got out, I'd probably end up staked and sealed in a coffin.
"That's why I'm agonizing over it too, you know? Trying to keep the goblins alive."
"Is biting humans not allowed?"
"That would cause a disaster. And it's even worse now because of you."
Mongmo tilted his head.
"Because of me?"
"You went around spreading rumors that I'm the Shut-In Blood Demon!!"
He even told people I command monsters. Sigh, this flying squirrel—his intelligence stat is really seventy?
"But Master."
"What."
"Why does Master help humans for free? Because they're the same species?"
At Mongmo's sudden question, I was the one left speechless. What was this flying squirrel saying?
"What are you talking about? I'm doing it to raise favorability. To spread the word that there are good goblins too."
"Just charge money, Master. Wouldn't that be better for everyone? Master earns money, and the Awakeners get to keep their lives!"
"···As if people would actually pay. We'd be lucky if they just stopped killing goblins."
Charge money? Get paid for saving lives? He had to make sense first.
"Hmm?! Very well! Master, focus solely on the Labyrinth as you have been!"
Whirrrl!
His fur puffed up, and Mongmo transformed into human form.
"I shall handle the business!"
"Yeah, yeah, do whatever you want."
What was this flying squirrel planning now?
***
Ever since Mongmo's visit, Association President Kim Min-woo had been monitoring the Shut-In Blood Demon's every move. Of course, he hadn't crossed into illegal territory. It was just Association employees casually loitering around his house under the guise of taking walks. Even those employees didn't know the true nature of their assignment. Only he and his secretary knew the top-secret details about Park Hyun-gi's identity.
Yet···.
"Does this guy ever come outside?"
True to his nickname, he hadn't taken a single step out since moving in. He didn't even come out to throw away the trash. Was he farming the Labyrinth as an Awakener? That was actually encouraged, but···. In reality, he just stayed home. In short, everything was being handled inside.
Then what about the Labyrinth?
"The start is good, at least···."
When he'd been asked to issue a public notice telling people not to kill goblins, he'd wondered how to handle it. He wanted to support it even now, but rumors from the community and an official Association statement had completely different levels of impact. He couldn't carelessly make such a statement. What if an accident happened and those goblins killed an Awakener? The Association would take all the blame. Things were already difficult enough without being dragged to the National Assembly for more lectures.
Still, the Shut-In Blood Demon was maintaining his humanity and moving in a positive direction. He seemed like a genuinely decent guy···. If handled well, this could be huge···.
Beep-.
The intercom on his desk rang.
- Mr. President, you have a visitor.
"A visitor? Who? I don't have any appointments. Let them in."
Click.
The door opened, and in walked the very person who had been complicating his thoughts lately—or rather, that person's subordinate.
"We meet again!"
"···You're the one who came. Please, have a seat."
Mongmo, wearing the appearance of a boy, plopped down on a chair with a grin.
"···Would you like some coffee?"
"No, milk please."
"···."
Mongmo's appearance and tastes were no different from a child's. But the problem was that the being before him wasn't human. When Kim Min-woo nodded, his secretary brought the drinks—coffee for Kim Min-woo, white milk for Mongmo.
Gulp gulp.
"Kyah!"
"···So, why have you come?"
"I wanted to talk business."
"···Business?"
With a white milk mustache still on his lips, Mongmo brought up the topic. Starting with -10 trust—was that really okay?
"We don't need the Association's guarantee you mentioned last time. Just permission is enough."
"What kind of business are we talking about?"
"A Labyrinth safety escort service."
"···?"
"You randomly encounter a goblin, and it turns out to be a companion NPC!? If you buy a membership, goblins will guide you through the Labyrinth together!"
Watching Mongmo spread his arms like "ta-da," Kim Min-woo frowned. So he wanted to push goblins into the second floor and have them accompany anyone they met? It was certainly a plausible idea based on the rumors circulating in the community. But···.
"What happens if someone buys the membership but doesn't encounter any goblins?"
"That's just too bad."
"···Isn't that too irresponsible? Especially when you're charging money?"
"But isn't it still an opportunity? If they don't buy the membership, the goblins won't help them even if they're in mortal danger!"
"···Then they'll just keep getting hunted?"
"So what? Our goblins spawn infinitely. Killing them only drops junk items and wastes energy, so just keep hunting goblins for life!"
"···."
He'd said he commanded monsters, and now it seemed the Shut-In Blood Demon had truly gone mad. But as Association President, the offer was tempting. Tens of thousands of people went missing in the Labyrinth every year—missing, meaning dead. If they could reduce even slightly the number of Awakeners who vanished without a trace, erased forever by the reset···. The newbies dying on the second floor might survive and become rankers. An Awakener's survival was the foundation of national power. If they flooded the second floor with infinite goblins as Mongmo said, people would encounter one or two while wandering···. And the image of goblins would change too. If given for free, people would be suspicious, but if sold for money, modern Koreans would actually believe it. This might work···?
"How much are you planning to charge for the membership?"
"One million won a month!! For Awakeners operating on the second floor, that's pocket change!"
Kim Min-woo shook his head at those words.
"W-Why? Is it too expensive···? Then a little cheaper···."
"No. Two million won a month."
"···Excuse me?"
"Charge two million won per month. And for this business—may we receive some investment from you?"
"···Oh?"
"Let's run it as a pilot project for a few months and see how it goes. If it works well···."
Association President Kim Min-woo, a forty-two-year-old man in a key national position, spoke.
"We'll push it as a national project."
"···Oho?"
He had smelled money.
***
Ever since the goblins entered the Black Forest, one more thing had changed. Kobolds had been added to our base.
Compared to goblins, the difficulty of turning them into familiars was higher, so their numbers weren't large, but we steadily increased them one by one. In truth, they had no outstanding qualities compared to goblins. If anything, they seemed even dumber. Though they walked on two legs, kobolds were no different from violent hyenas.
After countless vampiric goblins traveled across the second floor in groups···.
You have made 10 kobolds into familiars.
A bonus has been granted!
"This is pretty decent too, huh?"
Finally, we had ten kobolds. They were far too stupid to send out for direct farming, but what if we paired them with goblins?
The goblins now had mounts. Behold—the Vampiric Goblin Cavalry!
Kobold job options have been unlocked!
- Kobold
- Kobold Scout (new)
"Woof woof!"
"Grrrr woof woof!"
"Hey, what's with the barking?"
"Whine."
When I spoke, the kobolds being held by leashes by the goblins immediately whimpered and wagged their tails. I immediately promoted the ten newly recruited kobolds to scouts.
A kobold scout with a highly developed sense of smell.
With proper training, they can find anything.
Compared to goblins, the kobolds had much higher agility but rock-bottom intelligence. For now, I decided to have them loot the first floor of the Labyrinth. No need to risk damaging the hard-earned goblin favorability by sending them to the second floor.
"Gob."
"Kerk. Did you call, Captain?!"
"How's the new recruit replenishment going?"
"Still ongoing!"
As many died on the second floor, we kept producing vampiric goblins on the first. If they kept dying? We'd just overwhelm them with numbers. After training in the training grounds, they'd hit level 10 at high speed and get deployed to the second floor.
"The reset isn't far off, right?"
"Kerk! When the numbers appear in the sky, we return! After that, we search for Ether, kerk!"
"That's right."
Having a well-trained commander really made life convenient.
The first floor of the Labyrinth was now running on full auto. Every week, they brought me one Ether on schedule, plus they earned pocket money selling junk items.
Was I actually going to become a chaebol at this rate?
"Good, good! Then keep up the good work! If anything happens, come to my room."
"Kerk! Understood, Captain! Um···?"
"Yeah, when the reset ends, I'll treat everyone to a meat feast."
"Kerrrrk! You lot!! Go out and farm right now, kerk!!! Earn your meat money, kerk!!!"
"Mm-hmm! Well done, Gob!"
Just by giving up garlic and sunlight, money was pouring in. Even Ether came every week—one per week, four per month! Three of them I'd invest in myself, so monthly revenue of ten billion won! Plus junk items selling for twenty million won per week!
"Wow, how much tax are they going to take from this? Should I hire a tax accountant?"
I returned home, happily pondering such worries. Where should I spend all this money? I'd already bought a house—maybe a car next? Ah, right, I couldn't go out in sunlight.
I headed straight to the kitchen and grabbed a yogurt for a snack, pulling the lid open with a long stretch.
"···Hmm."
Thud!
The lid went straight into the trash can. I was a man earning a hundred billion won a year. I didn't lick yogurt lids.
"Lululu."
When I entered my room, Mongmo was watching a video on a tablet PC while munching on peanuts.
"Master, did something good happen?"
"Of course. Why wouldn't it? Money keeps coming in just by breathing. Tens of billions at that."
Of course, on the other side of that, goblins were being whipped, but whatever.
"Master really likes money!"
"Who wouldn't?"
"Mm-hmm! I knew it!"
"···What do you mean by that? Something feels off."
"That's why I worked hard too!"
What on earth was he talking about? Mongmo saying strange things wasn't new, so I let it slide. Maybe I should watch some YouTube.
"Oh? Chef White-Black Cook's ASMR video? Can't miss this."
When I pressed play, an ad started.
Should I get Premium now that I was earning so much? No, it still felt wasteful.
Then a familiar sight appeared in the ad. A CG-generated goblin appeared on screen.
- Are you afraid of the Labyrinth? Do you sleep well inside it?
"···There's no way you can sleep properly in the Labyrinth."
At best, it was a light doze. One wrong move and you'd sleep forever.
- For you, the Goblin Safety Escort!!
"···?"
- Did you spot a goblin in the Labyrinth?! Call out to it right away! It will become your reliable teammate!
"···??"
- Night watch? OK! Combat? OK! Your dependable partner who does everything with you!!
"?????"
- Sign up now! Only 1,999,000 won per month!
"···Uh, Mongmo?"
"Hmm, why do you call?!"
"Looks like there's someone else commanding goblins. Is this really some kind of monster tamer ability?"
Mongmo leaped from his desk, arms spread wide, and flew toward me before landing on my shoulder.
"Ah, that! It finally aired!"
- Hyeolma Guard! We protect your safety!
"The company name is Hyeolma, huh? Similar to my nickname."
"That's right! Didn't you say Master likes money?!"
"Nobody dislikes money."
"That company belongs to Master!"
"···Huh?"
"You're the president there! Hyeolma Guard!"
"···?"
"How is it! I named it well, didn't I! I took it from Master's nickname!"
"W-What are you saying, Mongmo?"
"We're saving goblins and making money, Master! 1,999,000 won every month!!"
Mongmo flew back to his spot and tapped the tablet before checking something.
"Already 1,200 people have signed up!! Master! That's 2.4 billion won per month!"
President···?
···Me?
···Monthly revenue of 2.4 billion won?
"Applications keep increasing! Quickly raise your Domination Power with Ether!!"
"···Huh?"
···It was going to grow even more?
End