There Are No Potatoes for Them
Rachel Campbell stood in the moonlight. It was the dead of night, and yet her armor was flawless, the Black Blade resting at her side — and the sight of her had Blow already regretting that he had stepped outside for something as trivial as a drink.
"So. Blow Deblique. How's the body?"
"As you can see, I'm in one piece."
"You didn't ask who I was. I take it you remember yesterday's introduction?"
"Not a memory I'm likely to forget."
It had been around the time things with Hervena had grown awkward enough to kill him, when Yulia came over and introduced her. Rachel had greeted him then with a smile, as if something about him had caught her interest, and Blow had thought her straightforward manner made her easier to talk to than Yulia.
"You were rather knightly."
"I'll take that as a compliment."
"We'll see each other again before long."
"If you're granting me that honor... though, what brings you all the way to the recovery room, my lady? I was under the impression Greig had already gone home."
"Why? Am I not allowed to come?"
"No, that isn't what I meant."
"I stopped in while passing, that's all. I'm on my way back from an audience with His Highness the Prince."
"I hope it was a good meeting. Well then, I'll just—"
Blow tried to slip back into the room. Rachel let out an incredulous little laugh and caught the back of his shirt.
"I, Rachel Campbell, am standing right here, and you're trying to go back inside?"
"Was there something else you wanted to say?"
"Your nerve is almost admirable, Blow Deblique."
She let go, and the two of them stood face to face. As he cleared his throat, Rachel offered him a sinister smile.
"You're getting out of here tomorrow?"
"Yes. I should be out before evening."
"Then how about we have dinner together?"
"Just the two of us, you mean?"
"We're hardly on those terms, are we?"
"That's true."
"We've decided to make a gathering of it. Yulia, Skadi, and those loyal people of yours who went through so much — all of them."
"May I ask when this was decided?"
"Yesterday."
Blow Deblique's danger sensor tripped on the spot. He put on the most amiable smile he could manage.
"Ah... I'm fine with—"
"What, do you have an appointment with His Highness?"
"No. I'm sorry. We'll do it your way."
"Good. Tomorrow evening we're eating at your restaurant, so keep that in mind."
The weight of it made him want to cry. Blow pointed at himself and asked once more.
"At my restaurant?"
"Yes."
"My restaurant is in the Dusk Block, and the food isn't exactly—"
"And what does that matter?"
Sensing that argument would get him nowhere, Blow shrugged.
"I'll leave early and have everything ready."
"I like a man who doesn't drag his feet. See to the tables yourself."
"Once you walk in, I doubt anyone else will dare come through the door anyway."
"You've a talent for making people laugh."
"If yesterday's duel is still weighing on you—"
At that, Rachel laughed as if she couldn't believe her ears.
"Now that really is funny. Do I look like a knight who would brood over a duel?"
"Even a hedgehog can go soft over its own little sibling, can't it?"
"Isn't that a saying about one's child?"
"I thought it might apply either way. I have an older brother myself."
"You had better set a very fine table tomorrow evening, Blow Deblique."
"I'll do my best. But why hold the dinner at my restaurant?"
"Yulia sang its praises so highly that my curiosity got the better of me."
One disaster piled on another. They said a negative times a negative made a positive, but there was no world in which these two would cancel each other out. Blow swallowed a sigh and dragged a hand down his face.
"Yesterday I asked her what possessed her to step in front of me."
"You asked her that, too?"
"Standing in my way requires a reason of that weight, Blow Deblique."
The Black Blade flashed in his sight, and Blow had no choice but to concede the point.
"And then she said this."
Rachel suddenly settled into Yulia's demure posture. Blow's brow, already halfway to disbelief, drew tight.
"The corn cheese there is the very best."
"What? Hahaha."
The perfect imitation of Yulia's manner broke him. Blow laughed for a good long while before he could answer.
"I think you're the one with the talent for comedy, my lady."
"I do have a bit of humor in me."
A brief silence followed. Then Rachel spoke in a voice far more serious than before.
"I apologize for being too rough with my hands that day. Worthless as he is, he's still my little brother. Yes — you were right. I went soft."
"I heard. That you meant to box my ears yourself."
"Are you all right?"
"I don't remember a thing, so I'm fine."
From inside came the drunken laughter of Skadi and Hervena. Rachel glanced that way and added, her voice flat.
"I don't think you're cut out for an ordinary life, Blow Deblique."
"Please refrain from cursing a small businessman like that."
"Hmph. For a noble, you say the strangest things. I'll see you tomorrow evening."
With that she turned on her heel and strode off. Blow, midway through a bow, felt a fresh stab of dread.
Yulia, and now Rachel. Couldn't he just leave the whole thing to Hans and run? The sort of people who would chase him to the end of the continent. Better to give up on that idea.
He let out a long breath and went back into the recovery room.
"That was one long trip to the washroom, Blow Deblique!"
Drunk and in high spirits, Hervena and Skadi were deep in a pour-and-drink contest, while Jane, her face flushed scarlet, lay asleep on his bed.
"What a mess."
"Get over here and take a cup!"
"I'm sorry!!!!!"
Hervena sniffled as she threw herself into Skadi's arms. Vowing never again to drink hard liquor with these two, Blow took the seat beside Skadi.
A little later, once Hervena had collapsed, he laid her down next to Jane. Skadi watched him, idly turning her cup.
"Blow, how were you able to fight like that yesterday?"
The sudden seriousness in her voice — the liquor must have been strong.
"Because that's what the situation called for."
"That's all?"
"More or less, it was what it was. Why?"
"I was just curious. I wanted to know why you kept getting back up. Again and again."
"I wasn't thinking much of anything. I just couldn't stand staying down, so I got up."
"If you went back, would you do it again?"
"It all worked out, didn't it? I think this was the best ending I could have managed."
As he answered, the cups filled with orange Ropert Special. Skadi looked at Jane and Hervena, then leaned toward him.
"You're a lucky one."
"Lucky?"
"Hervena, Jane... and someone like me."
"You say things like that without so much as a change in your face."
"Would it kill you to just admit it?"
She sounded a little hurt. Blow gave her shoulder a gentle pat.
"All right. Thank you. If it hadn't been for you this time, it would've been rough."
"Haha. Right?"
She joked, but something in Skadi had gone quiet. Blow remembered how awkwardly she had stood in the dueling hall yesterday, so unlike herself, and asked with care.
"Is it Rebecca?"
"..."
"What's there to agonize over? You've made it just fine all the way to fourth year. From here on, keep a reasonable distance and leave it at that."
Skadi hesitated, then let out a deep sigh.
"...The truth is, I ran into her one more time after it ended. And then her retainer showed up. That girl hates me something fierce."
"Danvers? Is there anyone who likes her besides Rebecca? Her personality is... well. Not that I'm in any position to talk."
Something in the way he took her side drew a smile out of Skadi for no good reason.
"Yeah. We'd just run into each other, so that's probably why — when the student council called us in."
"Why? What'd she say?"
"No, it's just..."
Skadi hemmed and hawed, too embarrassed to say it outright. Blow answered by dumping a generous pour into her cup.
"Why do you think a person drinks?"
"Because it feels good?"
"You drink to get honest. To get honest."
Skadi stared at his dead-serious face, then snorted a laugh. And then, with genuine difficulty, she began.
That afternoon, while Blow was eating one of Melo's sandwiches and listening to Megan fret, Skadi was waiting outside the inquiry room at the hall. The student council and the faculty council were conducting witness interviews, and she had one very large problem: the person next in line after her was Rebecca, the one she found most uncomfortable of all.
So Rebecca and Skadi ended up seated side by side in the corridor outside the inquiry room, and for more than thirty minutes neither of them said a word.
Who in the world set this order?
Skadi had grumbled it inwardly a hundred times or so when Rebecca, who had been sitting bolt upright beside her, suddenly turned her head. Skadi, wondering if a bug had landed, glanced down at her own skirt, and Rebecca quietly opened her mouth.
"The ice... was beautiful."
Startled, Skadi looked at her, then quickly averted her eyes and answered in a voice that shrank in on itself.
"...Thank you for the compliment."
"I'd never seen you use ice magic."
"My ice is rather shabby, so..."
"...Is Grand Duke Björn well?"
"Yes."
"I've been thinking I ought to pay my respects, but it isn't easy..."
"My lady!!"
Gray hair flying, Rebecca's retainer Danvers came running, then looked her over from face to feet in a voice thick with worry.
"My lady, are you all right?! For something like this to happen while I was away!!"
"...I'm fine."
Skadi pretended not to see and turned her eyes the other way. That was when a voice sharp as a knife-point drove into her.
"Skadi!"
The voice irritated her, but she looked anyway. Danvers was staring down at her with a face like she'd bitten into something foul.
"How dare you sit beside my lady! Get up this instant!"
"...The student council told me to sit here, so I sat."
"Talking back, without even knowing your place!"
"Danvers."
Rebecca checked her, but Danvers was already well and truly angry. She planted herself in front of Skadi and began to needle her in a soft, persistent voice.
"It's always like this when we get tangled up with you! Skadi Hetaya!"
The way she leaned on the name wore Skadi's patience thin. She gave a hollow laugh and glared, and Danvers shrieked at her.
"It's only because Lady Rebecca came through unharmed! If she hadn't, I wouldn't have let it go — not you, and not Hervena!"
"And what were you going to do about it?"
Dragging Hervena into it was more than Skadi could endure. She looked straight up at her, and Danvers let out a scoff and shot the question back.
"What?"
"I asked what you were going to do. Besides screaming like this, what can you actually do?"
"Haah. The shape of the way you talk... Well. I suppose it's only natural."
"..."
"You... should have changed both your family name and your given name. That the likes of you should dare be called by a name of the North."
The moment she heard it, Skadi shot up from her seat and stepped in close, as if she meant to shove her.
"If it grates on you that much, settle it the way Blow and Greig did."
"And who says I couldn't?"
Danvers answered without yielding. In that hair-trigger moment, the door of the inquiry room flew open.
Everyone who saw the person coming out had no choice but to freeze. Yulia Edfolk stood there with her brow drawn tight, glaring at them.
"What do you think you're doing? Danvers De Winter?"
"..."
Danvers couldn't manage an answer. She avoided Yulia's eyes with a sullen, reluctant face, and Yulia, baffled by the reaction, shifted her gaze to Danvers's master.
"Rebecca, I don't understand. Is this inquiry being conducted because Lady Skadi did you some harm?"
"No."
"Then what, exactly, is this situation?"
"...I'm sorry."
"Is it always like this? Rebecca Settelund?"
It was a hardened face on Yulia, who had only ever been kind — something none of them had seen before. Skadi and Rebecca alike swallowed dryly and could do nothing but wait for what she would say next.
"Whenever something like this happens, do you always just let it slide? All while you handle the Planning Department's work with such precision."
"I'm sorry."
This time Yulia's gaze moved to Danvers, whose fingertips were trembling at her side.
"Danvers."
"...Yes."
She wouldn't even meet her eyes. Yulia raised her voice slightly and called again.
"Danvers?"
"Yes."
"Apologize to Lady Skadi. Right now."
Yulia's voice had gone cold, and at her words Danvers was shaking from head to toe. Saying she was sorry to Skadi looked, to her, more hateful than dying. But it was none other than Yulia Edfolk staring her down with a chilling look, and in the end Danvers had no choice but to open her mouth.
"...I was rash. I'm sorry."
"..."
Skadi looked at Danvers, who was stumbling even over her words. Whether from rage or from the unfairness of it, tears stood in Danvers's eyes, and that only made Skadi more uncomfortable — but there was nothing to be done. She had been through scenes like this several times before and was sick to death of them. Not wanting the matter to grow any larger, she sighed and tossed the words at her as if casting them aside.
"...Thank you for saying so."
In that moment Danvers was looking at Rebecca — Rebecca, who had bowed her head to Yulia because of her. Ahead of her own feelings, she had put the lady she served in an awkward position. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying somehow to still her trembling hands.
"Lady Skadi."
Yulia didn't so much as glance at Danvers. She looked Skadi over, but Skadi's expression, of course, could not have been good.
"Lady Skadi, are you all right? You don't look well."
"Yes, I'm fine. I'm sorry, Senior Yulia, for such an unsightly scene..."
"There's no need for you to apologize, my lady. I'll change the order of the inquiry. This must be uncomfortable for you in more ways than one."
"Thank you for the consideration."
"All right. I'll see you tomorrow."
It was settled, for the moment. But Skadi was irritated by an atmosphere that made it seem as if she were the one at fault. Grateful for Yulia's consideration, she walked quickly, wanting to be out of there even a second sooner.
Listening had left even Blow's chest tight. He asked her, as she downed her drink, in a consoling tone.
"When did this happen?"
"Just a little while ago."
"How'd you even hold it in? Not smacking her even once."
She could hear that he meant it, and Skadi's expression had eased a great deal from before. Relieved as he looked at her, Blow folded his arms, shook his head, and spoke with a voice packed full of resolve.
"What about beer?"
"No beer either."
"Even if they tip more than I do?"
"Yes. Even if they tip ten times as much. Twenty."
"...Then shouldn't you sell to them?"
"I'm not selling."
She read the sincerity inside the joke, and at last Skadi smiled, bright and clear. They clinked their cups, and the night deepened.
The student council president's office.
Julbert Mertios, his hair in disarray, sat like a condemned man. Randolph — Second Imperial Prince, and president of the student council — was looking out the window.
"Julbert."
"Yes, President."
"When I began my term as president, what was it I asked of you?"
"...You told me to see that nothing troublesome arose."
"So I did. And yet you produced a fiasco like this."
Randolph's gaze stabbed into him, sharp, and Julbert had no choice but to bow once more.
"I'm sorry."
"Before long I'll be able to become a truly great student council president — the one who, during his own term, reduced the authority of both the council and its president. Thank you, Julbert Mertios."
"I'm sorry."
Outside, only the bleak cry of crows. After a long while, Randolph spoke again.
"President of the student council of Capall Municipal Magic School. A reasonably honorable seat, isn't it?"
"..."
"And should an honor like that be given to a half-wit who can't even get a grip on the few thousand students at a single school?"
"...You're right."
"Not that it applies to me. I'm a prince, after all."
"..."
"My term ends soon regardless, and I'll be leaving the school next February. Is that why you stirred up nonsense like this?"
"I'm sorry."
"But remember. Whether you like it or not, you are tied to me."
Randolph Serdia glared at him. Julbert swallowed dryly.
"What had you ahead of Yulia Edfolk was the students' support, wasn't it? That's gone now. Which leaves you as nothing at all."
"..."
"You don't even measure up to Rebecca Settelund — you're worse than our Cindy. The Treasury stays quiet, doesn't it? And that's with so much work, and such enormous sums changing hands."
"...I'm sorry."
"Julbert."
When Julbert lifted his head, a thin, cold smile rested at the corner of Randolph's mouth.
At those words Julbert looked at the prince before he realized he was doing it. The prince clicked his tongue and shook his head, and Julbert felt a headache beginning to surge up from the very deepest part of his mind.