Just a Dream
I woke up to find the sun already high in the sky.
My bleary eyes drifted to my smartphone. A message from Siwoo was glowing on the screen.
The moment I read those words, a wave of nausea hit me. I clamped a hand over my mouth. It took everything I had to settle my stomach before I could pick up the phone again. I opened my contacts and changed the name I'd saved.
[Porter (Kim Siwoo)] → [Siwoo]
"Yeah... a dream is just a dream..."
The nightmare I'd had last night refused to leave my head.
Normal dreams usually faded the second I tried to remember them, but nightmares had a way of sticking, clinging stubbornly to my mind.
But still. A dream was just a dream.
Siwoo would never say those things to me. The way he'd spoken to me at the very end—that could only happen in a dream. Right. I'd been too caught up in those dreams lately. I needed to forget them. I had to stop relying on them so much.
I wasn't the hero.
I was S-Class Hunter Han Haneul.
"It wasn't my fault..."
"It was all just a dream..."
"That wasn't me..."
I was scared. Just a few days ago, I'd desperately hoped Siwoo would remember his past life. Now I prayed with everything I had that he never would.
What kind of sin had I committed?
I was terrified of being remembered. Terrified of being hated.
"Siwoo..."
[No response]
My hand trembled as I dialed. I needed to hear his voice. Needed to know he was alive, that he was okay, that nothing was wrong.
I needed to be reassured.
I wanted to hear him say thank you for saving him.
"Hello? Haneul?"
"Y-yes! Siwoo!"
"Oh, what's up? Was there something missing from what I told you yesterday?"
"No! It's just... um... I wanted to hear your voice..."
"...Pardon?"
"Is that... not okay?"
I didn't even have time to come up with a decent excuse.
I'd already told too many lies.
"It's fine with me, but... did something happen? You sound awful..."
"I... had a nightmare..."
"A nightmare?"
"Yeah..."
That's right. It was all just a nightmare.
I was his savior. So it was fine. Nothing had actually happened.
Because I wasn't the hero. I was Han Haneul.
.
.
.
Hmm. It feels like the genre of my life has suddenly changed. To romance.
The most famous S-Class Hunter in South Korea suddenly called me, saying she'd had a nightmare and was scared, so she just wanted to hear my voice.
This couldn't be a dream.
The situation felt that unreal.
"Um. What kind of nightmare was it?"
"Well..."
I could sense her hesitation through the phone.
Was it the kind of dream you couldn't tell other people about?
Well, dreams were an incredibly private thing. It would be embarrassing to expose your own subconscious to someone else.
"It was a dream... about you, Siwoo."
"Huh? A dream about me is a nightmare? That kind of hurts..."
"Ah! No, that's not what I meant..."
"Pfft. I'm joking. Did I get hurt or die in it?"
"...Yes. I couldn't save you... you died... and you blamed me... It was that kind of dream."
"I see."
So that's why she called me.
It wasn't exactly a green light or anything.
"That's one hell of a dream."
"...Pardon?"
"Haneul. I'm not the kind of shameless person who'd resent someone just because they couldn't save me. I was definitely angry when that bodyguard ran away... but even then, instead of blindly blaming anyone, I focused on how to survive first."
"That's... true, but..."
"Or were you thinking of me as that narrow-minded of a person?"
"N-no! Not at all... Really, not at all."
"Then that's fine. It was just a stupid dream. Just forget about it. Go for a walk, watch people passing by, look at the clouds, and let it go."
Nightmares tend to stick in your memory more than anything. It probably means humans are far more sensitive to negative emotions.
But in the end, a nightmare is still just a dream.
Once you wake up from a dream, it fades quickly and has no effect on reality.
"...Siwoo, have you never had dreams like that?"
"What kind?"
"Dreams where someone dies... where you lose someone... where someone resents you... The kind that still feels eerie and gross even after you wake up. Those kinds of nightmares."
"Hmm, well. I have them sometimes. But a dream is just a dream. I don't let it bother me too much. It'll fade soon enough anyway."
"Right... Once you wake up from a dream, it fades quickly..."
Well, I was the type to record my nightmares in detail whenever possible.
Overcoming a nightmare once usually boosted the resolution of my lucid dreams by a lot. Nightmares were often clearer than regular dreams by nature, and analyzing them frequently gave me clues on how to develop my dreams further. So sometimes I even welcomed them.
Of course, there were nightmares that were truly unbearable.
"Then what if... it wasn't just a dream?"
"Huh?"
"What if it was a memory... Something that really happened before... and even though I want to forget it... I can't turn away from the responsibility... If the dream keeps forcing me to relive the things I tried to forget because they were too painful... What should I do...?"
"Hmm."
Was this... trauma?
She was talking in such a jumbled way that I couldn't be sure, but... it seemed like she'd been through something similar. Maybe she was remembering the time she lost colleagues in a gate. Using me as the trigger.
That would explain why she was showing so much interest in me if she was having nightmares related to that.
"If that's the case... I can't just tell you to forget it."
"Ah, right..."
"Still, I survived thanks to you, Haneul... So you really don't need to worry about it. All I feel toward you is gratitude. Like I said before, even if you hadn't been able to save me, I wouldn't resent you."
"...Okay."
Wow. She really had such a soft heart.
Maybe the rumors about her cold personality were just a defense mechanism born from that tenderness. Being a hunter was a dangerous job, and losing colleagues probably wasn't a once-or-twice thing. She'd probably tried not to open her heart to others too easily.
In my case, since she'd saved my life, I'd managed to break through that defense and see her true face.
'This feels kind of embarrassing.'
I was a porter who'd gotten in through senior connections like a parachute hire... Really, you never know what life will throw at you.
"Um, Siwoo."
"Yes, Haneul."
"...Could we... meet again sometime?"
"Hmm."
If meeting me helped her regain her peace of mind, I could make time whenever she wanted.
"It would be an honor. I'll make time whenever you like."
"Ah, no... Just tell me when you're free... I'll adjust my schedule."
And just like that, another date with an S-Class Hunter was set.
.
.
.
I thought we'd just chat and hang out.
But surprisingly, Haneul made a rather serious offer.
"Siwoo. Would you like to join our guild?"
"Pardon?"
It was a direct scouting offer.
She wanted me to become an exclusive porter for the guild.
"Well, porters usually hire outside help, but we do have porters in our Resource Team... Being part of the guild would be much more stable."
"Hmm. That's..."
It wasn't a bad offer for me either.
I was basically a half-unemployed freelancer anyway. Joining a guild would let me gain all kinds of experience. My senior had actually offered to help me get into a guild a few times before. I'd turned it down because it felt too much like riding coattails, though. Part-time work was fine, but getting a full-time position through connections would definitely rub some people the wrong way.
"If I suddenly join, wouldn't there be issues with fairness toward the other employees?"
"Ah! That's fine. You protected the other porters in that gate and upheld our guild's honor and prestige. If we say it's a special hire based on that achievement, no one will complain."
"I see."
With that kind of justification, it did seem okay.
Special hires happened at every company anyway.
"From our Resource Team's perspective, we'd prefer a porter who can at least protect themselves. And you don't have to be a porter! If you'd prefer an office job or any other position, we'll accommodate you as much as possible."
"Hmm. Being a porter sounds good. I actually wanted to gain more gate experience."
As a full-time employee, I probably wouldn't face anything too dangerous... Joining the guild would let me experience all sorts of different gates. That would make my dreams even richer.
"Ah! You said you dream, right?"
"Yes."
"That's a relief. Pfft..."
Wait. If I got hired like this... wouldn't I become the porter who has both the Guild Master and the face of the guild's S-Class Hunter as connections? Hmm. I should be careful not to stand out too much...