Chapter 167
Chapter 167
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 167
Chapter Title: vs Barcelona -1
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***
After the Champions League semifinal matchup between FC Barcelona and Union Berlin was confirmed, online communities were flooded with all sorts of reactions.
[Title: Hey, can we actually beat Barcelona?]
Those guys smashed Bayern Munich and Chelsea—fucking gangsters.
└ Barcelona was insanely strong.
└ Union Berlin smashed Bayern too. Gotta watch the game though, no guarantees.
└ No way, you know it.
└ Seeing you spout that bullshit makes me wanna catch whatever disease you've got.
└ Fuck off, it could happen!
└ Oh man, look at this shameless prick...
└ I'm sticking with Park Chan-hyuk on this one.
└ Even Park might struggle against Barcelona.
└ For real, what kind of team is that? Especially Messi—that dude can play.
└ Yeah, no joke. Smashing Bayern and Chelsea like that? No wonder they're calling him the reincarnation of Pelé.
And rightly so. There was something different about this Barcelona—on another level entirely.
They'd crushed Bayern Munich and Chelsea to get here. And the standout star in both games? Lionel Messi, just 22 years old.
['Pottrick' Messi demolishes Chelsea at home, sends team to Champions League semifinals.]
└ At this point, purely on skill, isn't he basically Pelé-Maradona reincarnated?
└ Dude's insanely good;;
└ Everyone said Messi was great, but damn, this level?
└ But he's this good and Koreans barely know him?
└ How many Koreans even watch foreign soccer tho...;;
└ In Korea specifically, Union Berlin's probably more famous lol
└ True lol In Korea, Son Heung-min >>> Messi.
Based on his Champions League performances, Lionel Messi was already being hailed at just 22 as the next heir to Pelé and Maradona.
[Park Chan-hyuk lavishes praise on Barcelona's Lionel Messi. "Messi will one day surpass Maradona and Pelé to become the greatest soccer player in history. Ronaldo? Sorry, but he's got a long way to go starting from Gerd Müller...."]
And then Park Chan-hyuk poured even more fuel on the fire.
*......Why's he been coming after me lately?*
Cristiano Ronaldo, suddenly dragged into Park's interview and getting bodied, was understandably baffled.
But Park had his reasons for dissing Ronaldo.
*Fuck! I loved you, Cristiano.*
He was a victim of the Asiad no-show incident, after all.
He still couldn't forget that failed crush from his past life.
***
Time flew by after the Champions League semifinal draw.
[Union Berlin on cusp of back-to-back Bundesliga titles! Manager Park Chan-hyuk: "I'm still hungry."]
While handling league fixtures, I racked my brain over tactics for the Barcelona game.
*This team's insane.*
But the more videos I watched of Barcelona, the more my head spun.
Sure, any soccer fan who knew the future might say "go high press against Barcelona."
But now that I was actually back in time watching their games firsthand, it didn't seem that simple.
*......Am I seriously gonna high press these guys?*
Regrettably, this Barcelona couldn't be beaten with a high press. Unlike the future, this was prime time for their midfield trio.
Prime Messi, Iniesta, Xavi Hernández, Sergio Busquets—pressing that group was basically just handing them the space behind.
*What team has this many press-beating monsters?*
Teams that tried aggressive pressing against Barcelona actually got hammered harder.
That's why every opponent dropped deep and defended—they had no choice.
Managers who didn't? They got obliterated by Barcelona and sacked.
Even with Barcelona's clear weakness (high defensive line), no one exploited it for this exact reason.
*If I can just neutralize Xavi Hernández somehow....*
Easier said than done.
*You bald octopus-headed bastard... I'm jealous!*
Honestly, as a manager, I envied Pep Guardiola.
Pep could build tactics around peak Iniesta, Xavi, Busquets, and Messi just entering his prime.
Xavi's form tanked after 2010 anyway.
Essentially, Pep was the only one who got the full benefit of Messi and the trio.
*Messi's one thing, but prime trio? No answer.*
That day, watching Barcelona footage, I kept thinking about just parking the bus.
***
While I agonized over tactics for Barcelona, time marched on.
Union Berlin kept winning in the league, piling up points.
The gap with second-place Bayern Munich widened—league title was basically ours.
Oh, and we got knocked out of the DFB-Pokal in the round of 16 by Bayern.
Starters were gassed, so we had to rotate.
Pokal win would've been nice, but unavoidable.
*If I had to pick between Champions League and Pokal, it's Champions League.*
Juggling Champions League and Bundesliga was tough enough—we had to cut corners.
Pokal mattered less than Champions League anyway.
*Fine, you win it.*
We could toss the Pokal to Bayern like charity.
- Union Berlin cuuuuuurse!
- Never challenge the Bundesliga kings again!!
Problem was Bayern fans running their mouths after the win.
That died down once we reached the Champions League semis.
"Park Chan-hyuk is a god and Union Berlin is invincible!"
"Yahoooooo!"
*......Why do these guys look half-insane?*
Union Berlin fans were high on semifinal euphoria, rationality on life support.
Pokal results couldn't touch them anymore.
With no clapback, Bayern fans went quiet.
Anyway.
Time flew.
April 14, 2010—Iceland's volcano erupted.
Flights canceled due to ash, but Champions League semifinal first leg loomed.
Barcelona begged UEFA for a postponement due to travel woes—denied flat out.
*Huh...? This is jackpot?*
Now they'd bus from Barcelona to Berlin. About 1,500 km. Their form would be wrecked.
And that's when victory started smelling sweet—not lonely bachelor stink, but sweet triumph.
"Heung-min, let's talk."
"Y-Yes? Sure!"
Spotting the angle for a win, I called Heung-min to my office.
"Can you shut down Messi?"
He looked expectant for a home start, so I made the sneaky pitch.
*......Me?*
Heung-min blinked, caught off guard.
"You're talented... Never mind, Heung-min. Just prep well for tomorrow."
I tried convincing him again, but his pure, unscarred innocence made me back off.
That night, I pulled an all-nighter tweaking tactics.
Failed on Messi duty, but win now felt possible.
***
Pre-match interviews ahead of Barcelona vs. Union Berlin.
With Barcelona delayed, I wrapped mine first.
Meanwhile, rejected by UEFA, Pep Guardiola and Barcelona bused 1.5 days to Berlin for the away leg—barely made it.
Their bus covered 1,547 km.
Arriving wiped, Pep faced interviews.
First question to greet him?
- Union Berlin manager Park Chan-hyuk said Koreans love eating octopus. Your thoughts...?
None other than Park Chan-hyuk's provocation.
Pep's scalp tingling? Perfectly natural.
***